Haven't touched a drop in...

quinrea01 · 17-08-2014 9:04pm

Mickey Dazzler wrote: »

So Im around a bit now and foolishly though all would be gravy but its not....

The drinking life nearly destroyed my mind in the end… my sense of self, my once abundant self confidence was gone. I though that when I quit I’d be “fixed” but I’m not. I just don’t know who I am anymore. I was so sure of myself once upon a time. Its ironic as I had nothing to be sure about and now I have achieved so much and should be standing tall but I’m not. I’m afraid of my own shadow. So much of my personality was caught up in the wild man persona, which became pretty desperate towards the end. But I don’t know which is worse. I can’t even speak now. Literally. The words don’t come out..

I don't want to discourage anybody who is just staring out... it is the best decision I ever made.......but....

Your feelings are not uncommon. Sometimes when we have achieved something brilliant, something we've been working at for years, we experience an anti-climax. Life seems at times to be boring and pointless and we feel temporarily lost. At these times we must stay focused and as determined as before to stay on the straight and narrow. The negative feelings will pass and all will be fine. Sometimes too it helps to find a little inspiration from somewhere. Maybe a book or a film can provide this. I would highly recommend a movie named 'Flight' which I watched very recently. It stars Denzil Washington as a cross-addicted airline pilot and the portrayal of the main character's struggles with addiction are very believable and the subject is handled very honestly. Worth a look. Anyway, just relax and let the negative feelings wash over you. You will feel much better very soon.

xzanti · 17-08-2014 11:23pm

Much as I agree with the above posters on some of the points there.. I think if you feel like "words aren't coming out" and you've maybe hit a wall, so to speak.. it's best to go and talk to your GP or a counsellor..

Some fights are too hard to win by yourself!! Well done staying off the drink Mickey Dazzler.. That's a huge step.. but that old Irish chestnut of "sure you'll be grand" can do more harm than good in some cases.

I think sometimes heavy drinkers are really self medicating.. when they stop drinking, whatever they were 'drinking away' will inevitably come to the fore, and probably worse than ever!

If you're feeling anxious or depressed.. go to your Doctor, that's what they're there for.

Kunkka · 18-08-2014 9:15am

Diablo Verde wrote: »

9 months yesterday

A nice coincidence that it was also my birthday yesterday, and got to spend it with some great friends, none of whom felt the need to question the fact that I don't drink.

I'll be running the Valencia marathon on 16th November, which by another happy coincidence falls on the day that I'll have been 1 year free from alcohol.

Life is great!

Great stuff, one of my proudest moments after giving up booze was doing the Dublin marathon last year. Best of luck with the Valencia one!

xzanti wrote: »

Much as I agree with the above posters on some of the points there.. I think if you feel like "words aren't coming out" and you've maybe hit a wall, so to speak.. it's best to go and talk to your GP or a counsellor..

Some fights are too hard to win by yourself!! Well done staying off the drink Mickey Dazzler.. That's a huge step.. but that old Irish chestnut of "sure you'll be grand" can do more harm than good in some cases.

I think sometimes heavy drinkers are really self medicating.. when they stop drinking, whatever they were 'drinking away' will inevitably come to the fore, and probably worse than ever!

If you're feeling anxious or depressed.. go to your Doctor, that's what they're there for.

Very true, EVERYONE needs help.

Sunnyisland · 18-08-2014 1:21pm

Mickey Dazzler wrote: »

So Im around a bit now and foolishly though all would be gravy but its not....

The drinking life nearly destroyed my mind in the end… my sense of self, my once abundant self confidence was gone. I though that when I quit I’d be “fixed” but I’m not. I just don’t know who I am anymore. I was so sure of myself once upon a time. Its ironic as I had nothing to be sure about and now I have achieved so much and should be standing tall but I’m not. I’m afraid of my own shadow. So much of my personality was caught up in the wild man persona, which became pretty desperate towards the end. But I don’t know which is worse. I can’t even speak now. Literally. The words don’t come out..

I don't want to discourage anybody who is just staring out... it is the best decision I ever made.......but....

Hi mickey dazzler

My life is a thousand times better without alcohol. For me its more about living truer, richer, and deeper, being present. It’s not because I stopped feeling anxious and overwhelmed and tired and frustrated, but because I sat with all of those things rather than medicating them, so I could actually deal with them (or at least get started on the process).you have to except you have changed, you are not the person you once were.

The real secret to getting sober, and to repairing all the broken aspects of your life, is to take the time (probably through trial and error) to figure out the causes of your addiction and the aspects of your character that can be pressed into service in curing them. To do that, you'll have to figure out your own list of things you enjoy about drinking and how you can keep those things alive through sobriety. Then you need to figure out what part of your personality will drive you to stay sober. Instead of regretting or resenting it, embrace it and be grateful that you're alive and can feel joy, and pain, and everything in between.

Also what xzanti said :-)

Sunnyisland · 18-08-2014 2:39pm

I posted this elsewhere and found it,might be relevent to above ?

For many people abstinence from alcohol is viewed as the only acceptable outcome to treatment.Well how we view any problem obviously influences the solutions or treatments that we believe possible and/or acceptable. We can also point out that if the (former) drinker is unhappy in abstinence then they will not maintain it, hence, the suggestion that lifestyle changes are required. Like all followers of any pursuits alcoholics often mix with others who share their lifestyles and goals of sobriety, generally through self help or mutual help groups or here.

However if they are to participate in the wider world outside self-help groups they are liable to come into contact with alcohol. Non-alcoholic friends may be supportive and not actively encourage the alcoholic/addict to indulge, however just being in the company of others who are getting intoxicated, or even just consuming, can represent a major temptation to relapse. This temptation is even more acute for alcoholics since alcohol is so widely available everywhere. Indeed the alcoholic often fears that his/her social life will be over and it may take a considerable length of time until they feel that they can socialise at all, and even longer if alcohol is present. Thus total abstinence is a difficult goal to maintain.
.
While one can speak about alternate goals and choice, for some there are sound medical reasons why abstinence is essential. In cases where there is severe liver damage and further consumption of alcohol will only exacerbate the problem, stopping drinking is strongly recommended. Thus there can sometimes be very good grounds for abstinence for health reasons and in cases where moderation cannot be achieved. Nevertheless even under these circumstances it is a difficult goal to maintain. Nevertheless it can be achieved and millions of people throughout the world achieve and maintain abstinence daily. So get your plan & goal and go for it, Change your lifestyle today.;-)

GerB40 · 18-08-2014 8:58pm

So yesterday was day 108 off the drink and even though I've haven't been feeling too great lately (anxiety disorder back like a bang) I decided it was time to properly test myself. I went to the Tipp v Cork semi final, an occasion I've always considered a 50/50 between a piss up first, support the boys second.

I hope I'm not being intolerant but everyone there annoyed me, drunk young lads roarin abuse at the opposing teams fans, fights and general divilment on the hill. But what got to me the most was I was one of them most years since 2001 at the tender age of 15.

My question is, will drunk people having a good time always annoy me? I'm generally easy going but yesterday was just too much..

On the plus side Tipp won so hooray!!

marienbad · 18-08-2014 9:34pm

GerB40 wrote: »

So yesterday was day 108 off the drink and even though I've haven't been feeling too great lately (anxiety disorder back like a bang) I decided it was time to properly test myself. I went to the Tipp v Cork semi final, an occasion I've always considered a 50/50 between a piss up first, support the boys second.

I hope I'm not being intolerant but everyone there annoyed me, drunk young lads roarin abuse at the opposing teams fans, fights and general divilment on the hill. But what got to me the most was I was one of them most years since 2001 at the tender age of 15.

My question is, will drunk people having a good time always annoy me? I'm generally easy going but yesterday was just too much..

On the plus side Tipp won so hooray!!

Ger - I think this is something we all have to come to terms with in our own way . The fact is when you are stone cold sober and by that I mean there isn't even any residue in your system from the booze up two days ago the carry on of others can vary from the mildly amusing to the fcuking appalling .

Initially I used to get embarrassed if people made fools of themselves etc ,( possibly it was remembering that I was often that fool )but now I help I know it is not my problem and I leave if it gets uncomfortable.

Matches and such can still be a problem , but generally speaking the tolerance of even the mildest drunken behaviour is so much less now than it was even 10 or 15 years ago.

18-08-2014 11:40pm

GerB40 wrote: »

I hope I'm not being intolerant but everyone there annoyed me, drunk young lads roarin abuse at the opposing teams fans, fights and general divilment on the hill. But what got to me the most was I was one of them most years since 2001 at the tender age of 15.

My question is, will drunk people having a good time always annoy me? I'm generally easy going but yesterday was just too much.

First and foremost, well done on being in a place immersed in a drink culture and not giving in. That's something to be proud of, and the one thought which put loneliness on me before I gave up.

As for your question, I think if they weren't annoying you, you wouldn't be growing. Giving up booze is allowing you to grow and develop again. But the annoyance is just a passing phase as you'll stop putting yourself in such an environment. I'm very definitely the opposite now: being in noisy pubs with televisions roaring so loud I can't talk to somebody and people ar an drabhlás just makes me want to go home to peace, to quiet, to calm. I value peace an awful lot more these days. As my wife said to me, 'Look around you; everyone has moved on from the pub culture'.

And I opened my eyes and it really sank in for the first time that the pub culture I had immersed myself in was a transitional phase in the lives of the vast majority of people around me, particularly if they are focused on career progression or doing something productive with their lives. Yes, they still go to a pub now and then, but the regular pub nights are firmly in the past. People move on; people get new priorities.

I would think of all the opportunities not being into the drink culture now gives you. How many hours would you have spent drinking/in the pub scene per month before this? (the guys who annoy you are wasting their precious hours) What could you do with those hours now? Learn an instrument? a language? train the local hurling team? aim to run a marathon? Breathing in the fresh crisp morning on a run or walk at 6am? The sheer zest for life in the last thought alone is enormous when contrasted to drinking booze. There must be something life enriching you could do with all those hours. Like a broken relationship, you can look at it as loss, or use all the pain to reinvent and rediscover yourself. Best of luck. It gets so much easier.

GerB40 · 19-08-2014 12:24am

[Deleted User] wrote: »

First and foremost, well done on being in a place immersed in a drink culture and not giving in. That's something to be proud of, and the one thought which put loneliness on me before I gave up.

As for your question, I think if they weren't annoying you, you wouldn't be growing. Giving up booze is allowing you to grow and develop again. But the annoyance is just a passing phase as you'll stop putting yourself in such an environment. I'm very definitely the opposite now: being in noisy pubs with televisions roaring so loud I can't talk to somebody and people ar an drabhlás just makes me want to go home to peace, to quiet, to calm. I value peace an awful lot more these days. As my wife said to me, 'Look around you; everyone has moved on from the pub culture'.

And I opened my eyes and it really sank in for the first time that the pub culture I had immersed myself in was a transitional phase in the lives of the vast majority of people around me, particularly if they are focused on career progression or doing something productive with their lives. Yes, they still go to a pub now and then, but the regular pub nights are firmly in the past. People move on; people get new priorities.

I would think of all the opportunities not being into the drink culture now gives you. How many hours would you have spent drinking/in the pub scene per month before this? (the guys who annoy you are wasting their precious hours) What could you do with those hours now? Learn an instrument? a language? train the local hurling team? aim to run a marathon? Breathing in the fresh crisp morning on a run or walk at 6am? The sheer zest for life in the last thought alone is enormous when contrasted to drinking booze. There must be something life enriching you could do with all those hours. Like a broken relationship, you can look at it as loss, or use all the pain to reinvent and rediscover yourself. Best of luck. It gets so much easier.

Well I can play guitar and speak (nearly) fluent Irish so I'm half way there

Seriously though, it's reassuring to find out that this is just a transitional phase and I do think I've learned from it.
For years I've been a total slob whose only ambition was to get drunk but now I'm on a fitness buzz and it is genuinely fantastic..
I'm still not nearly where I want to be but for the first time in years it doesn't seem like an impossible task..

Keep up the good fight folks, it can be beaten.

HcksawJimDuggan · 20-08-2014 5:07pm

Day number 2 of my second attempt at giving up alcohol for good.

First attempt was from 27th Dec 13 and lasted until 14th March 14. Didn't seek any professional help during this time but followed the posts on some of the non drinkers threads for inspiration. Originally went back on it and was drinking at a respectable level (one night weekends with no major instances). However, over the course of the summer theres been too many weekends where a friday night out has lead into a monday evening which has made me realise that I can't drink at a safe level (no matter how hard I've tried to convince myself that I can).

Majority of regrets I have all involve instances with too much alcohol so it's time to quit for good while there's still something worth salvaging.

Not entirely sure what the point of this post is but I guess I just needed to get something down in writing so I can look back on it as I progress. Maybe that was the problem with my first attempt, I was reading other peoples posts and never actually posted anything in NDG.

20-08-2014 8:07pm

GerB40 wrote: »

Well I can play guitar and speak (nearly) fluent Irish so I'm half way there

Excellent, Ger. I haven't set foot in Club Chonradh na Gaeilge since last I gave up the drink and am just back from the Gaeltacht so if there are a few of us here who'd like to go on a Non-Drinkers' Group as Gaeilge I'd be brave enough to return as well.

xzanti · 20-08-2014 11:30pm

HcksawJimDuggan wrote: »

Day number 2 of my second attempt at giving up alcohol for good.

First attempt was from 27th Dec 13 and lasted until 14th March 14. Didn't seek any professional help during this time but followed the posts on some of the non drinkers threads for inspiration. Originally went back on it and was drinking at a respectable level (one night weekends with no major instances). However, over the course of the summer theres been too many weekends where a friday night out has lead into a monday evening which has made me realise that I can't drink at a safe level (no matter how hard I've tried to convince myself that I can).

Majority of regrets I have all involve instances with too much alcohol so it's time to quit for good while there's still something worth salvaging.

Not entirely sure what the point of this post is but I guess I just needed to get something down in writing so I can look back on it as I progress. Maybe that was the problem with my first attempt, I was reading other peoples posts and never actually posted anything in NDG.

Welcome to the forum Jim, congratulations on your decision.

My 2 pieces of advice would be these.

1. Read the Allen Carr book on quitting alcohol. Doesn't work for everyone but it worked for me and other posters here.

2. Make a list of all of the things you wish to change about yourself and your life. Tick them all off as the changes occur, read and add to them regularly. Use them as affirmations so to speak. This was a great tool for me when I first gave up and it still stands to me now.

Best of luck!

Tramps Like Us · 21-08-2014 12:18am

Sad to say I fcuked up.

A few weeks ago there was a work night out and I went... one of these thing were you have to go as its a new job and I didnt want to be "out of the loop" or miss making friendships. Despite vowing not to drink I ended up having a few after a lot of (kind hearted)"pressure" from a woman I had my eye on.... I gave in. No one to blame but myself. I only had a couple and all went well and had a great time... so of course being a dope I thought being off it for six months or so meant I could be responsible... so I went out the next night too... and the entire following weekend and got totally destroyed, blacked out, the whole nine yards.... the worst I've ever been I think. thank god no one from work saw me. Have been having a major pity party the last week. I had been training hard but that stopped when I went back on the drink... and I just polished off my second takeaway this week. Amazing how everything can go to sh!t so quick, a real self implosion.

I'm just so angry at myself for not having the strength to say no because everything was going so well. I'm so angry for stopping eating healthily and training for the past couple of weeks. And I'm angry at myself for being so sad over it all. A real crippling sense of failure. Being sober and training had really improved my sense of self worth and all round happiness.

I just need to snap out of it now and get my sh!t together from tomorrow on... back training and off the drink. (havnt touched it since and never will again!!!). I just posted this here to vent and get it out... feel a bit better about it now

Kunkka · 21-08-2014 9:24am

Don't beat yourself up about it. These things can happen but an experience like that will stand to you as you know the end result. I'd exercise caution for a few months though and plan your spare time away from drinking environments.

enoughalready · 21-08-2014 4:13pm

Sorry to hear that Tramps like Us, hope you are okay, I can only imagine what you're going through and how disappointed you are but don't dwell on it too much, back up on the horse you go and giddy up as they say! lol

syngindub · 21-08-2014 9:27pm

Tramps Like Us wrote: »

Despite vowing not to drink I ended up having a few after a lot of (kind hearted)"pressure" from a woman I had my eye on....

I'm interested to hear how this part went !!!

Sunnyisland · 21-08-2014 11:14pm

Tramps Like Us wrote: »

Sad to say I fcuked up.

A few weeks ago there was a work night out and I went... one of these thing were you have to go as its a new job and I didnt want to be "out of the loop" or miss making friendships. Despite vowing not to drink I ended up having a few after a lot of (kind hearted)"pressure" from a woman I had my eye on.... I gave in. No one to blame but myself. I only had a couple and all went well and had a great time... so of course being a dope I thought being off it for six months or so meant I could be responsible... so I went out the next night too... and the entire following weekend and got totally destroyed, blacked out, the whole nine yards.... the worst I've ever been I think. thank god no one from work saw me. Have been having a major pity party the last week. I had been training hard but that stopped when I went back on the drink... and I just polished off my second takeaway this week. Amazing how everything can go to sh!t so quick, a real self implosion.

I'm just so angry at myself for not having the strength to say no because everything was going so well. I'm so angry for stopping eating healthily and training for the past couple of weeks. And I'm angry at myself for being so sad over it all. A real crippling sense of failure. Being sober and training had really improved my sense of self worth and all round happiness.

I just need to snap out of it now and get my sh!t together from tomorrow on... back training and off the drink. (havnt touched it since and never will again!!!). I just posted this here to vent and get it out... feel a bit better about it now

Tramps like us, we have to be incredibly selfish to stay sober, even to the point of disappointing others.

You know something, if your womanfriend doesn't have a drinking problem, she would probably still have ordered the bottle she wanted, had a glass or two from it, and then stopped.

That's the way "normal" people drink. We are not like them - I just cannot imagine doing that - I would want the bottle/pint to myself, and probably a second one to keep the first one company. We pay waaaaay to much attention to what's in other people's glasses - because we have a problem. Normal people just see a glass of beer/wine - we see a never-ending drinking opportunity. I visited a friend for dinner last weekend. He had a glass and a half of wine - as I said, we notice these things - and that was it. Even now for me that's alien,We can't do things like that, and that's why we're here.

Look on the bright side: you're back, you've learnt from your sober days, and you've learnt from your mistake. So, get Day 1 done and dusted because Day 2 is waiting for you - make it happen! :-)

leinsterdude · 22-08-2014 1:43pm

So posted here before love beer so much keep saying no more but only have four beers at a time so really I am
Not too bad eh ? Never get pissed never black out etc etc still might be too fond of it but to what harm is four beers maybe four days a week, maybe cut down to two nights then I might not feel I have to give it up ?

GerB40 · 22-08-2014 4:35pm

leinsterdude wrote: »

So posted here before love beer so much keep saying no more but only have four beers at a time so really I am
Not too bad eh ? Never get pissed never black out etc etc still might be too fond of it but to what harm is four beers maybe four days a week, maybe cut down to two nights then I might not feel I have to give it up ?

By the sound of it you just like drinkin. If it escalates it might get problematic but at the moment I wouldn't worry too much..

Sunnyisland · 22-08-2014 5:00pm

leinsterdude wrote: »

So posted here before love beer so much keep saying no more but only have four beers at a time so really I am
Not too bad eh ? Never get pissed never black out etc etc still might be too fond of it but to what harm is four beers maybe four days a week, maybe cut down to two nights then I might not feel I have to give it up ?

Only you know whether it's bad or not, if it's not effecting your life in any way,and the important one, do you have to have them beers every night ? If the answer is no then IMO enjoy :-)

quinrea01 · 22-08-2014 10:47pm

Tramps Like Us wrote: »

Sad to say I fcuked up.

A few weeks ago there was a work night out and I went... one of these thing were you have to go as its a new job and I didnt want to be "out of the loop" or miss making friendships. Despite vowing not to drink I ended up having a few after a lot of (kind hearted)"pressure" from a woman I had my eye on.... I gave in. No one to blame but myself. I only had a couple and all went well and had a great time... so of course being a dope I thought being off it for six months or so meant I could be responsible... so I went out the next night too... and the entire following weekend and got totally destroyed, blacked out, the whole nine yards.... the worst I've ever been I think. thank god no one from work saw me. Have been having a major pity party the last week. I had been training hard but that stopped when I went back on the drink... and I just polished off my second takeaway this week. Amazing how everything can go to sh!t so quick, a real self implosion.

I'm just so angry at myself for not having the strength to say no because everything was going so well. I'm so angry for stopping eating healthily and training for the past couple of weeks. And I'm angry at myself for being so sad over it all. A real crippling sense of failure. Being sober and training had really improved my sense of self worth and all round happiness.

I just need to snap out of it now and get my sh!t together from tomorrow on... back training and off the drink. (havnt touched it since and never will again!!!). I just posted this here to vent and get it out... feel a bit better about it now

Well here's the thing TLU, every day that dawns is a new day with new and fresh opportunities. This was one of the basic and best lessons I learned. I, too, slipped and slid like a duck on a frozen lake. Whenever you fall down get back up again and carry on. Get hold of the recommended literature and try to talk to others who may be able to offer you help and advice. You have suffered a set back but all is not lost and quite evidently you have the desire and the will to fight on. Good luck to you.

souls · 23-08-2014 11:23am

100% agree with quinrea! TLU Today is a new day!!!The exact same thing happened to me!why?because we are merely human.. Its actually a good thing (in a weird way) that this happened because its how you learn from and move forward from our mistakes that define us.
This probably all sounds very cliche and you may have indeed heard and/or read these kinds of things before but that is for a very good reason!it resonates true with so many people! Realies said to me that you can't simply unlearn what you have learned over your time of abstinence! this actually is so true! the amount of techniques i have unknowingly taught myself that have helped me get back on track is incredible! Anyway I wish i could just shake your hand and say you are doing a great job go easy on yourself!i know there are good and bad days!they come and go like clouds in a windy sky!i just want to echo that statement Today is a new day! it helps me anyway!

Tramps Like Us · 29-08-2014 11:17pm

Thanks guys, you are all very kind. I spent a few hours earlier doing out a list of things which are good about myself or which I am grateful for and it was surprisingly long.

I feel a lot better now and I realise that I cant keep going on pretending like I dont really have a problem. Realises was spot on when he said that I might have to be selfish or let others down in order to look after myself. I realise now that I cant have the same social life as other people like me in their early twenties - I've tried taking up a bunch of new hobbies and have met lots of new people, but inevitably when you are making friends you are invited to the pub after whatever it is you signed up for to take the next step on the "friendship ladder" or whatever you want to call it. I have to say no to this and steer clear of this, I've been out and drank only water but obviously it only takes a woman offering me a drink to tip me over for fear of looking "dry" or something equally stupid. No more pubs.

How do people say no to friends or acquaintances when they ask you out to the pub without sounding like a dickhead, putting them off or telling them that you have a drink problem?

quinrea01 · 30-08-2014 10:14am

Tramps Like Us wrote: »

Thanks guys, you are all very kind. I spent a few hours earlier doing out a list of things which are good about myself or which I am grateful for and it was surprisingly long.

I feel a lot better now and I realise that I cant keep going on pretending like I dont really have a problem. Realises was spot on when he said that I might have to be selfish or let others down in order to look after myself. I realise now that I cant have the same social life as other people like me in their early twenties - I've tried taking up a bunch of new hobbies and have met lots of new people, but inevitably when you are making friends you are invited to the pub after whatever it is you signed up for to take the next step on the "friendship ladder" or whatever you want to call it. I have to say no to this and steer clear of this, I've been out and drank only water but obviously it only takes a woman offering me a drink to tip me over for fear of looking "dry" or something equally stupid. No more pubs.

How do people say no to friends or acquaintances when they ask you out to the pub without sounding like a dickhead, putting them off or telling them that you have a drink problem?

The people close to you will already know you have a drink problem and respect your wishes and think no less of you; in fact in most cases they will admire your independent attitude and admire you for it and the others will be a bit confused at first but will also come to admire your stance and think no less of you for it. Best wishes.

enoughalready · 30-08-2014 8:52pm

Hello everyone! Hope you are all having a stress free weekend and are enjoying your sobriety.

I'm 9 months sober this weekend and so glad and grateful to be living the alcohol free life. Almost every single aspect of my life has improved and I am happier than I have ever been. Period.

I, however was parked outside an AA meeting last night and did not have the courage to go in. I was paralyzed with fear and anxiety and the fight of flight situation came into play when I sped off after 20 minutes of torturous self debate! I have been to a few meetings over the past 9 months, maybe 6 or 7 in total but haven't been to one in the past 3 months. I have a mental block of some description and just can't face it. I have anxiety issues which no one would know about as I keep it well hidden and try to fight the fear a lot. I don't know if AA is for me but I do like the fact that there is a group of like minded people sharing their strength, experience and hope with me. I thankfully haven't craved a drink in a long time and don't feel at risk at present but feel the fellowship is a great way to make friends when I've had to let past friendships slip away due to their toxicity and volatility around alcohol etc...

Signed up to some counselling that might help me with my negative emotions at present which include; I'm not worthy, good enough. I don't deserve to be happy. I'll never fall in love etc... all pity party stuff but its down deep in my core and hard to ignore. It keeps resurfacing and resurfacing. Hope the counselling will help and soon be able to face the AA rooms again.

This is such a lonely road and I can't help feeling isolated...

Would love to 'just snap out of it' but its not that simple. Anyway, sorry to burden ya's but needed to get this off my chest.

Can't wait to get a sponsor and work the 12 steps. I feel it would be the making of me.

Amazingfun · 31-08-2014 12:23am

For anyone with anxiety issues, or even anyone curious about AA, online meetings are a safe and easy way to participate.

In fact, I know several people who started out this way , good luck

http://www.aa-intergroup.org/

hubba · 02-09-2014 11:51am

Firstly, well done, enoughalready. You've really come a long way.

The tough stuff is in what you said below. I can identify totally with that and whilst it is painful to face, facing it you are which you probably weren't when boozing so it's tough now but with consistent 'work' and compassion towards your new emerging self, things WILL improve. And if in doubt, on a lonely night of self loathing, ask yourself this 'will going back to boozing be helpful'? The answer is always NO. Wishing you all the best on your journey, and you're never alone on NDG.

enoughalready wrote: »

Signed up to some counselling that might help me with my negative emotions at present which include; I'm not worthy, good enough. I don't deserve to be happy. I'll never fall in love etc... all pity party stuff but its down deep in my core and hard to ignore. It keeps resurfacing and resurfacing. Hope the counselling will help and soon be able to face the AA rooms again.

This is such a lonely road and I can't help feeling isolated...

Would love to 'just snap out of it' but its not that simple. Anyway, sorry to burden ya's but needed to get this off my chest. .

enoughalready · 02-09-2014 4:20pm

Thanks a million hubba

xzanti · 03-09-2014 11:05am

marienbad · 03-09-2014 1:32pm

xzanti wrote: »

congratulations

Haven't touched a drop in...

Comments