Lets all be anxious/depressed together.

Reactor · 26-01-2011 12:13pm

I did 2 job interviews in the same place on 2 different days down in Waterford so I had to do 8 hours on the bus on Saturday and then again on Monday, the interviews were horrible and awkward and now Im still sick and miserable from it, I feel cold and nauseous all the time, and everything has a horrible pointless feel to it. All I can eat is tea and biscuits or maybe an apple every now and then, Im such a friggin mess, its like one brush with normal society totally destroys me

I just cant function at all anymore, my mouth goes dry if anyone says anything to me, I have zero friends, I never go out, I just sit in my room with the tv or internet waiting until its tme to go to bed.

Tags · 26-01-2011 5:43pm

Just found this thread here and skimmed through it. I have some of the same issues affecting me for the last years. Great to see a nice and friendly place to chat with others affected.

LegacyUser · 26-01-2011 5:52pm

margarite wrote: »

It s a brillent sign, I agree with the person advised you about not giving the money, take care of your self. If you feel bad about not thinking of them take time out for yourself, make a your favourite drink and tell yourself its my life, I m not responsible for anybody but myself, my future and then do a plan for study time, giving yourself short breaks like say I have to get such an amount done, when you are happy with what you have achieved award yourself. Do something nice again and go on for there. I have suffered a number of years with depression and its the only way I found to help me with my study without getting to stressed. If you are still finding it hard please come back to us, we all have our problems and I know if I can I will try help people if I can.

Thank you so much for your reply. I have only two more exams to go. I had today off thank god. I saw a doc there today and she gave me lustral.(doc I saw last week would give me nothing!) So starting on that today.

As well as that I booked a massage and facial next week. Even though I'm still doing exams I am meeting up with friends and stuff..

I just can't wait to be finished college; I'm pretty certain I'll be back sitting two repeats in September but sure what can you do!

Hope all is well!

LegacyUser · 26-01-2011 5:54pm

I was prescribed these tablets today and I was wondering if anyone else out there is on them and how have they been feeling since they have started using them.

Reactor · 26-01-2011 6:09pm

I meant to say to you Intears, the welfare system in this country is one of the most generous in the world so there really is no reason for parents to be leaning on their kids in this day and age, just my opinion, hope you feel better.

margarite · 27-01-2011 6:52pm

intears wrote: »

Thank you so much for your reply. I have only two more exams to go. I had today off thank god. I saw a doc there today and she gave me lustral.(doc I saw last week would give me nothing!) So starting on that today.

As well as that I booked a massage and facial next week. Even though I'm still doing exams I am meeting up with friends and stuff..

I just can't wait to be finished college; I'm pretty certain I'll be back sitting two repeats in September but sure what can you do!

Hope all is well!

Drs. that understand what it is actually like are few and far between, that why I find a site like this such a help. Envy you the massage and facial but you definately derserve it. Enjoy and you never you know you will do better then you think in your exams, I really hope that you do. Best of luck:)

RubyXI · 27-01-2011 10:53pm

I see and night out invite coming up in my immediate future. Time to start coming up with excuses to get out of this one. No wonder everyone hates me :rolleyes:

pheasant tail · 28-01-2011 1:28am

Well all i just happened to come accross this by chance but glad i did

Dont mean this in a bad way but glad to see that theres others in the same boat as meself and having it as bad and worse

so i wish all the very best.

Im not sure if i can ask this and if i cant,sorry mods delete it,but can i ask has anyone had any experience of depression in relation to roaccutane......??????

Reactor · 28-01-2011 1:37am

phi3 wrote: »

I see and night out invite coming up in my immediate future. Time to start coming up with excuses to get out of this one. No wonder everyone hates me :rolleyes:

I did that for ages the last time I had a job and now I have nothing, I go weeks without speaking to someone who isnt serving me in a shop or takeaway, my phone never rings either and if anyone looked in my inbox its nothing but texts from my mother asking if Im okay

Im really struggling with rage now aswell, I could be lying in bed and Ill remember someone pushing me or taking food without asking and Ill get so mad Ill start picturing strangling them or beating the **** out of them even though I never would in real life, Ill literally be shaking and drenched in sweat I get so mad, this is happening 3 or 4 times a day now, what can I do about it? I tried paying for councelling but it was useless even though I went to the most highly rated one in my area and spent a good bit of money.

margarite · 28-01-2011 10:17am

phi3 wrote: »

I see and night out invite coming up in my immediate future. Time to start coming up with excuses to get out of this one. No wonder everyone hates me :rolleyes:

What makes you think that? not everyone hates you, you sound like me sometimes when I am very depressed, there are a few ways I can get out of those times, but what works for me might not work for you, think of things that you like doing, and try do one of those when you are feeling so low. Hope things will improve soon, keep on writing on this site and maybe some of us can help you more. I really hope so.:)

Tags · 28-01-2011 3:28pm

phi3 wrote: »

No wonder everyone hates me :rolleyes:

I feel like that a lot of the time. But just think about it, you started a thread that's 60 pages long with almost 900 posts on it. That screams popular to me, at least online anyway

R_a_u_l · 28-01-2011 7:00pm

margarite wrote: »

Unfortunately you have to push your g p again for referral but if you do not he/she will think you are coping. How accessable is your nearest town. If you go on the Aware web site or recovery website they will have the information where they have access to one of their meetings where people, in the same position can advise you in a friendly manner. Most of these people are going through what you are going through. You do not have to speak unless you want to, but maybe someone at the meeting might have the information that you want. Please try this, of come back to us with regard to what your G P. Some of the symptoms (sorry bad speller) sound like they could be stress related but still your G P will be able to tell you that they have send for a referral. Please do not isolate yourself it make everything worse. Good Luck. Take care.:)

Thank you for your reply Margarite!

I rang the GP on Monday and got them to contact a neurologist (didn't appear to have done so without my prompting which was disappointing afer 2 years of paid visits to him) and so am waiting for my appointment. Having quite a bad week with headaches and dizziness, so hoping not having to wait too long.

Unfortunately there are no Aware meetings within 30 min drive (which is probably the limit of my driving currently). You mention "recovery website" - could you tell me what this is as I am not familiar with this?

Fingers crossed it is "all in my head" as the gp obviously thinks, and thanks again for taking the time to reply to me.

Reactor · 28-01-2011 11:08pm

An expert on depression there on the Late Late Show, didnt catch the name but he was the very first guest if you want to watch the repeat or RTE Player, he reckons oily fish like mackerel and Vitamin D supplements are vital in the winter for fending off depression, and you can accurately guess a countries depression levels just by looking at how much seafood is in their diet, something to try maybe.

margarite · 29-01-2011 4:09am

R_a_u_l wrote: »

Thank you for your reply Margarite!

I rang the GP on Monday and got them to contact a neurologist (didn't appear to have done so without my prompting which was disappointing afer 2 years of paid visits to him) and so am waiting for my appointment. Having quite a bad week with headaches and dizziness, so hoping not having to wait too long.

Unfortunately there are no Aware meetings within 30 min drive (which is probably the limit of my driving currently). You mention "recovery website" - could you tell me what this is as I am not familiar with this?

Fingers crossed it is "all in my head" as the gp obviously thinks, and thanks again for taking the time to reply to me.

It also maybe caused by anxiety or depression, but it is better to be sure then sorry, sorry if you thought I was pushing you to go back to your G P as sometimes this also puts pressure on you which you do not need. Recovery is another place people can go to talk with people who are like us depressed, if you go onto any of the following web sites:- Aware, Grow or recovery u should where the nearest help is to your home. In the meantime please contact this site for help. I m glad you have an appointment for an neurologist, in the mean time keep in contact with this thread. There are some ways that I have being taught through my friends that have helped I will send you a private message if that is allowed and if you want me to do so, but only if I m allowed and you want me to do so.

margarite · 29-01-2011 4:12am

C_Dawg wrote: »

Cheers for the kind words, much appreciated

I've taken to daydreaming in work so a bit of the worry is gone with that

I m a little down myself at the moment, just to confirm the following I was taught this way of lowering my stress levels through a course which was led by Trinity College and Belfast University, arranged through by physc. So I do hope that you are not making fun of what I suggested.

pheasant tail · 29-01-2011 4:20pm

Can i just ask has anyone hear ever had any experience with st patricks..????

Tags · 29-01-2011 7:08pm

margarite wrote: »

I was taught this way of lowering my stress levels

Hi margarite, hope you're feeling better since you wrote your last message.

Would you mind sharing that way of lowering stress? It might help myself and others on here. Thanks

Tags

margarite · 30-01-2011 4:45pm

french toast wrote: »

Just wanted to share something.

I've been suffering from depression for about 5 years now,never went to a doctor to have it diagnosed unfortunately or to let them know how bad it gets sometimes.Used to just struggle through it even though the odd time I was barely able to speak or do anything,no motivation to do anything.Just horrible.
Then in the past 2 months I had one of the worst spells of it.I didn't go to college for about 2 months(couldn't get out of bed),ignored my friends,didn't go out.Feels like I become 'stupid' and forgetful.I'm a bit socially awkward but it gets 10 times worse in a depressed state for me.Things that seem easy are impossible.Unable to hold a simple conversation with someone that I've known for years.And the total apathy that came over me was terrible.
Want to see a doctor soon so that I can get rid of it or atleast control it.
I know it probably stemmed from when my mam passed away when I was 13 but the way it comes and go's is frustrating because its usually when I'm relatively happy,nothing seems to trigger it.Although it does seem to follow a pattern as in it will come at a certain point in the year or if theres a major change in my life,like starting college or something.

Thats it anyway,sorry for rambling on.

You are now rambling on I know I can only speak for myself and all of the above is true and I ve being dignoised with a certain form of depession and one of the things that trigger is change. So I d say you and I are now the only ones that change can cause us destress. Good luck, I know what I am doing is very hard to do and it took me a long time to learn how to do it but I did a course which was run by some Universities here in the Republic and the North and we were taught how to survive what times are hard. I may not be explaining this very well as the protocols of the thread disallows me from doing so. Anyway after a lot of practice and a lot of time I made myself by taking baby steps doing things slowly, I will say to myself (yes I do talk to myself) like giving myself a prep talk and say to myself are you going to allow yourself to be run by your habit of ignoring life or are you going to run your own life and get one with it. I m now saying it is easy but it is not. I hope you understand what I m trying to say.

margarite · 30-01-2011 4:51pm

R_a_u_l wrote: »

First time poster, long time reader of this thread.

I have suffered from anxiety and depression for upwards of 10 years but did not do anything about it until about 2 years ago when it started to get the better of me, with me struggling to keep it together at work.

I have been on and off antidepressants (currently back on for 5 weeks) and unfortunately have not found one that has worked for me. I live alone, in a rural village and have become quite isolated - hence boards.ie has become a source of advice and comfort in the absence of having someone to talk things through with.

Through my GP I have sought a referral to Psychriatric services - requested last October and heard nothing back. I have also sought a referal to a neurologist/MRI scan 2 weeks ago (my vision is constantly blurred, getting headaches and have a frequent crawling sensation in back and chest) and have not heard anything back yet.

How long should I be waiting to get to see a specialist before I start chasing my GP or should I look to find another GP?? I am quite reserved and don't like to push unreasonably, but I am going out of my mind with worry that I have MS or something and would really like to find out 1 way or the other.

I anyone could advise on how to get to see a specialist I would be greatful.

I received an response e mail from the boards which contained information that we had said to each other in a pm, I honestly had nothing to do with that being put on the site, and hope that you do relise that I am just as annoyed and upset as I m sure you are. I feel the pm should be kept private and am very hurt and surprised that this has happened.:mad:

margarite · 30-01-2011 4:58pm

Tags wrote: »

Hi margarite, hope you're feeling better since you wrote your last message.

Would you mind sharing that way of lowering stress? It might help myself and others on here. Thanks

Tags

A little, I take each day as it comes. As for ways for lowering stress levels it different from person to person. One that I was taught was recognising when I am stressed and have a lot to do, I do the following make a list of things that I have to do, then I put them in order of the most important thing and in that list I make sure I have some fun things included in that list. The other things I was taught was if I m feeling stressed to to recognise first why I am stressed and then drink a mug of coffee/tea and take a timed out break then do some of the work and promise whatever I have done to my satisfaction I will promise myself another fun things to do after a specified time. Walking, talking to friends, going to places I like to go to. Playing computer games which I am able to do as to how I m feeling. I do hope this helps.

R_a_u_l · 30-01-2011 6:01pm

margarite wrote: »

I received an response e mail from the boards which contained information that we had said to each other in a pm, I honestly had nothing to do with that being put on the site, and hope that you do relise that I am just as annoyed and upset as I m sure you are. I feel the pm should be kept private and am very hurt and surprised that this has happened.:mad:

You are fine, nothing to worry about.

The recovery organisation you mentioned hold meetings local to me - had never heard of them. Has anyone else got any experience on them?

Hope it is ok to post link to them (apologies to moderator if this is against the rules????)

http://www.recovery-inc-ireland.ie/

Tags · 30-01-2011 7:20pm

margarite wrote: »

I was taught was if I m feeling stressed to to recognise first why I am stressed and then drink a mug of coffee/tea and take a timed out break then do some of the work and promise whatever I have done to my satisfaction I will promise myself another fun things to do after a specified time.

I'm the same. In work we're allowed 15 minutes comfort breaks so if I'm feeling stressed out I can pop out for three or four minutes for a quick smoke. Those four minutes might not sound like much but it's chance to let the hair down and de-stress if only for those few moments.

margarite · 31-01-2011 2:23pm

R_a_u_l wrote: »

You are fine, nothing to worry about.

The recovery organisation you mentioned hold meetings local to me - had never heard of them. Has anyone else got any experience on them?

Hope it is ok to post link to them (apologies to moderator if this is against the rules????)

http://www.recovery-inc-ireland.ie/

I went to one meeting and I just had to listen, for I cannot remember how long, then you tell them whatever you want to tell them in as how you are feeling and each member will give you advice. They have a book which they read from and this book contains helpful information they read a passage from this book each week. Hope this helps.

LegacyUser · 31-01-2011 2:41pm

Hi all,

I thought I would post back on my progress. I have been doing alot better since last Friday. Exams are now over which is great. Also now nearly a week on the lustral, don't know if thats having effect or if it's the relief of having the exams done!

I am due back to the counsellor now on Thurday afternoon, she's really nice and very supportive. As well as that I'm starting my work placement for college next Monday so there's alot going on at the minute.

I havn't had much contact with home in recent days which is a bit of a help I'd say, I have decided that I am no longer going to give in to their demands, as hard as this is going to be it has to be done.

Thank you for all yer advice

LegacyUser · 01-02-2011 12:49am

Hi,
I'm just coming in here to vent a bit..received a bit of bad news last week regarding my condition which will require further treatment.. desperately depressed but trying my best to keep my spirits up and put on a brave face...just losing hope at this stage, I've fought to the bitter end and pulled back..but mentally I don't know if I'm able to do it anymore..it's just too much too handle.

Reactor · 01-02-2011 12:53am

Whats wrong exactly?

margarite · 01-02-2011 9:11am

Visitor123 wrote: »

Hi,
I'm just coming in here to vent a bit..received a bit of bad news last week regarding my condition which will require further treatment.. desperately depressed but trying my best to keep my spirits up and put on a brave face...just losing hope at this stage, I've fought to the bitter end and pulled back..but mentally I don't know if I'm able to do it anymore..it's just too much too handle.

It is hard to receive news like that, please just do what you have advised to by your Dr. Vent here all you want, and take each day as it comes. If you do not feel well physically take it easy for a while and if you can do something to take your mind off what s happening i e like watch t v, have friends visit you but do what I do (Sorry everybody, not feeling to good today but if you want to come over and make your own tea/coffee I would love to see you.) If you want to be on your own do that but not to much of it and its then that you start thinking. Hope this helps.:)

LegacyUser · 03-02-2011 12:15am

I've been following this thread for a while, just trying to pluck up the courage to post my own story. So, yeah...

I turned 18 near the beginning of January. Since I was in primary school I remember being bullied badly, however I remember swallowing it and just blocking it out (In retrospect I was a child, so I didn't know how bad that was!). That went on outside school too, in any activities I tried (summer camp, and what not). I, again, blocked it out. Once I started secondary school I had no idea how to be friends with someone. I considered it a given that everyone was over there and I was here. I still do to an extent. I suppose my real problems came in Second Year, when I ran out of room for emotions to store. It began coming up. I remember randomly crying at the bus stop, screaming, shouting, hitting things. This was all in private, except for the bus stop obviously.

I didn't keep this up. Towards the end of 2nd year I began to resort to self-harm. This severely escalated in 3rd year. I seemed to be the lackey for the year - people had their stresses about the Junior Cert, I was their relief. I attempted suicide 3 weeks before the Junior Cert.. Thankfully I survived, unknown to anyone here, and carried on. I've made it a rule, never to attempt that ever again. I'm sticking to that!

I kept self-harming, not telling a soul about things up to that Christmas. I quit SH-ing. I made it 384 days. I finally caved on New Year's Night, 2010. I ended up deeper in the pit. 384 days of the same old "block it out" routine hurt worse than before. My moods became erratic. My moods change uncontrollably. It's affecting my school work badly. I sometimes see delusions, some random but some flashing back to "friends'" abusing me, and primary school.

I still SH. Not badly. Not endangering. Just do it to cope.

November last I had enough. I went to my GP who referred me on to James's. The week after my 18th I met with a new psychiatrist there, who couldn't diagnose me. All he could do is refer me to a counselor for the time being. (On the phone he mentioned a psychiatric ward twice...).

I've not heard back from him since. I was to hear from him by that Friday, the 15th. I've rang twice. To no avail. This is literally my only shot at professional help. I can't afford private, it HAS to be HSE.

So yeah, that's my little rant over and done with

starviewadams · 03-02-2011 3:54pm

MJ232EI wrote: »

I've been following this thread for a while, just trying to pluck up the courage to post my own story. So, yeah...

I turned 18 near the beginning of January. Since I was in primary school I remember being bullied badly, however I remember swallowing it and just blocking it out (In retrospect I was a child, so I didn't know how bad that was!). That went on outside school too, in any activities I tried (summer camp, and what not). I, again, blocked it out. Once I started secondary school I had no idea how to be friends with someone. I considered it a given that everyone was over there and I was here. I still do to an extent. I suppose my real problems came in Second Year, when I ran out of room for emotions to store. It began coming up. I remember randomly crying at the bus stop, screaming, shouting, hitting things. This was all in private, except for the bus stop obviously.

I didn't keep this up. Towards the end of 2nd year I began to resort to self-harm. This severely escalated in 3rd year. I seemed to be the lackey for the year - people had their stresses about the Junior Cert, I was their relief. I attempted suicide 3 weeks before the Junior Cert.. Thankfully I survived, unknown to anyone here, and carried on. I've made it a rule, never to attempt that ever again. I'm sticking to that!

I kept self-harming, not telling a soul about things up to that Christmas. I quit SH-ing. I made it 384 days. I finally caved on New Year's Night, 2010. I ended up deeper in the pit. 384 days of the same old "block it out" routine hurt worse than before. My moods became erratic. My moods change uncontrollably. It's affecting my school work badly. I sometimes see delusions, some random but some flashing back to "friends'" abusing me, and primary school.

I still SH. Not badly. Not endangering. Just do it to cope.

November last I had enough. I went to my GP who referred me on to James's. The week after my 18th I met with a new psychiatrist there, who couldn't diagnose me. All he could do is refer me to a counselor for the time being. (On the phone he mentioned a psychiatric ward twice...).

I've not heard back from him since. I was to hear from him by that Friday, the 15th. I've rang twice. To no avail. This is literally my only shot at professional help. I can't afford private, it HAS to be HSE.

So yeah, that's my little rant over and done with

Sorry to hear that things are going badly for you,maybe you could go see your G.P. again and explain to him about how the HSE have mis-managed your situation.He may be able to make a few phone calls etc to speed the process up and get you some help.

Princess Peach · 03-02-2011 4:36pm

I wish I could stop getting upset by the silliest little things that most people can just brush off. I was doing really well the last couple of weeks and then I'm not even quite sure why but I've just been crying for the past couple of hours. And now I just feel awful. I guess when things are going well, sometimes I forget how easily my mood can just swing the other way around.

Lets all be anxious/depressed together.

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