Most disappointing toys from your childhood

Akrasia · 18-04-2014 9:28am #1

Everyone remembers the toys that they always wanted but never got, and the toys that they loved and played with every day, but what about the toys that promised so much but delivered so little?

I remember when I was 8, I got 'Shark Attack Bowling' for my birthday
It's a game where you have a wind up plastic shark that you aim at a bunch of plastic pins shaped like fish.

The Ads on the tv were cool but man was it boring to play. It took ages to set up the pins and then when you hit them with the shark, half the time they didn't fall over properly, and even if they did, the payoff was nowhere near the effort.

We ended up using the pins as targets for water guns and bow and arrows (that we made from beech trees and bailing twine) so at least it wasn't a complete waste of money.

18-04-2014 9:29am

Dolls. I never could understand why girls got given dolls. They're so frickin boring.

MrSchecter · 18-04-2014 9:30am

The virtual reality advertisements were grossly misleading.

El Guapo! · 18-04-2014 9:32am

A pair of rollerblades.

Put them on, fell on my hole a thousand times, buried them in a wardrobe forever.

stefan idiot jones · 18-04-2014 9:35am

Evil Knevil rocket and motorbike.

Utter Crap. Fell over within a foot of the winding launcher.

fryup · 18-04-2014 9:36am

the stylophone, awful sound off it..like a bumble bee in a jar

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vqpICSfKFE0

RoboRat · 18-04-2014 9:37am

Domino Rally... reminds me of sex, hours of putting the groundwork and effort in for a couple of seconds of pleasure.... even worse when you are let down by a faulty product

Akrasia · 18-04-2014 9:40am

Deleted User wrote: »

Dolls. I never could understand why girls got given dolls. They're so frickin boring.

My wife got some china dolls from an aunt when she was a girl but wasn't allowed to play with them in case they broke. When she was a teenager she drew goth makeup all over them in permanent marker and altered all their clothes so now they're pretty freakin badass

whiskeyman · 18-04-2014 9:42am

Asking Santa for a radio controlled truck, but getting one that has a cable going to it instead!
I may as well just push the truck along as the cable is only 2 metres long anyway!
Had dreams of controlling it from my bedroom window and watchin it zoom around the streets and back garden...

Akrasia · 18-04-2014 9:42am

El Guapo! wrote: »

A pair of rollerblades.

Put them on, fell on my hole a thousand times, buried them in a wardrobe forever.

I got rollerblades while on holiday in France, they were really cheap over there, i think 200 francs or something. I spent half the holiday learning how to skate and brought them home.
It's much harder to rollerblade on gravel than it is on tarmac.

Akrasia · 18-04-2014 9:53am

whiskeyman wrote: »

Asking Santa for a radio controlled truck, but getting one that has a cable going to it instead!
I may as well just push the truck along as the cable is only 2 metres long anyway!
Had dreams of controlling it from my bedroom window and watchin it zoom around the streets and back garden...

Most radio control cars promise more than they deliver.

I remember my uncle had this RC car in his bedroom and he would never let me play with it and it looked so awesome, Finally years later he was moving house and he said I could have it.

It was not as fast or as fun as it looked on his shelf.

anncoates · 18-04-2014 9:54am

[Deleted User] wrote: »

Dolls. I never could understand why girls got given dolls. They're so frickin boring.

So their brothers can take the dolls hostage and force them to do sex positions.

danniemcq · 18-04-2014 9:56am

I got one of those push scooters for Christmas one year.

Such a waste. the roads were/are terrible at home so couldn't use it, the house was surrounded by either grass or gravel so couldn't use it there and the footpath didn't even go the whole way to town.

smallerthanyou · 18-04-2014 9:57am

Mousetrap. Wanted it for about two years, finally got it and it wasn't very good!

pickarooney · 18-04-2014 9:57am

Deleted User wrote: »

Dolls. I never could understand why girls got given dolls. They're so frickin boring.

How are they boring, assuming they're in some way articulated? You can do pretty much anything with a doll.

Gambas · 18-04-2014 9:59am

Scalectrix.

Always wanted a set, but never got one. Until I was a parent and I bought it 'for the kids'. Very disappointed.

dan1895 · 18-04-2014 10:01am

whiskeyman wrote: »

Asking Santa for a radio controlled truck, but getting one that has a cable going to it instead!
I may as well just push the truck along as the cable is only 2 metres long anyway!
Had dreams of controlling it from my bedroom window and watchin it zoom around the streets and back garden...

I got what looked like a radio controlled police car before but on opening the box it turned it was just a battery operated police car. Just switch it on and let it go, had absolutely no control over it. Two minutes of this before it was switched off and next time it was seen was on its way to the sale of work.

biketard · 18-04-2014 10:03am

whiskeyman wrote: »

Asking Santa for a radio controlled truck, but getting one that has a cable going to it instead!
I may as well just push the truck along as the cable is only 2 metres long anyway!
Had dreams of controlling it from my bedroom window and watchin it zoom around the streets and back garden...

Ha! You just reminded me of a "remote controlled" police car my granny bought me. It had the (far too short) cable, like yours. Also, it could only go straight forward, or backwards while swerving to the left. Trouble is that the wheel that was supposed to move so that it reversed on a curve didn't work right, so it ended up only ever going straight forward or straight back. Brilliant present that one.

Will I Amnt · 18-04-2014 10:04am

Bought one of these last Sunday. They don't tell you that it's on a fecking string and you have to drag it around :rolleyes:

Gambas · 18-04-2014 10:04am

Oh, and Action Man. Looked so cool in the ads, but in real life he was almost impossible to stand up, nevermind stand up and look imposing. Always with bendy limbs that made him look like he suffered from rickets, and he held guns like an accordion.

Gambas · 18-04-2014 10:05am

dan1895 wrote: »

sale of work.

haven't heard that expression in a looooong time.

Davarus Walrus · 18-04-2014 10:06am

Subbuteo. The ads made it look like you could capture the atmosphere of a FA Cup Final. The reality was a crumpled pitch, complex rules flicking plastic players with your finger, and punching your brother in the face after playing it for 5 minutes with him.

anncoates · 18-04-2014 10:07am

Gambas wrote: »

Scalectrix.

Always wanted a set, but never got one. Until I was a parent and I bought it 'for the kids'. Very disappointed.

This.

And subbuteo as well.

Totally looked better on TV.

The sandwich toaster of the toy world.

castletownman · 18-04-2014 10:09am

When I first got a video games console the coolest game around was Bonestorm.

But I ended up getting Lee Carvallo's Putting Challenge. It was sooo boring.

danniemcq · 18-04-2014 10:10am

whiskeyman wrote: »

Asking Santa for a radio controlled truck, but getting one that has a cable going to it instead!
I may as well just push the truck along as the cable is only 2 metres long anyway!
Had dreams of controlling it from my bedroom window and watchin it zoom around the streets and back garden...

Akrasia wrote: »

Most radio control cars promise more than they deliver.

I remember my uncle had this RC car in his bedroom and he would never let me play with it and it looked so awesome, Finally years later he was moving house and he said I could have it.

It was not as fast or as fun as it looked on his shelf.

What you wanted is this beast

The Tyco RC Python (stupid name when you see what it does)

Looked like a normal RC car and was really fecking good, great speed fairly bullet proof but with the press of a button it opened up to reveal a snake that would shoot water (ya know like a spitting cobra, not a fecking python)
images below and pretty sure i have one down home, must check now this weekend

Waitsian · 18-04-2014 10:10am

The Slinky.

Its a spring that goes down the stairs. Yeah, and....? :rolleyes:

danniemcq · 18-04-2014 10:11am

anncoates wrote: »

This.

And subbuteo as well.

Totally looked better on TV.

The sandwich toaster of the toy world.

wow wow wow hang on...

are you dissing sandwich toasters?

danniemcq · 18-04-2014 10:12am

mod9maple wrote: »

The Slinky.

Its a spring that goes down the stairs. Yeah, and....? :rolleyes:

it breaks gravity...

http://media.giphy.com/media/huYDeLxRJEXGU/giphy.gif

Maphisto · 18-04-2014 10:12am

Deleted User wrote: »

Dolls. I never could understand why girls got given dolls. They're so frickin boring.

I always peeked in there undies - for a time I thought everyone must be like that too.

danniemcq · 18-04-2014 10:13am

Maphisto wrote: »

I always peeked in there undies - for a time I thought everyone must be like that too.

peeking into undies or smooth?

anncoates · 18-04-2014 10:15am

danniemcq wrote: »

wow wow wow hang on...

are you dissing sandwich toasters?

No, they're awesome.

But they never turn out as stylishly perfect as the blurb pictures.

Or maybe my technique is to blame.

Most disappointing toys from your childhood

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