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The question of parents with young children in public

135

Comments

  • Closed Accounts Posts: 205 ✭✭MiniSquish


    What I find the most annoying is when you are working and parents bring their kids in while they are shopping and then proceed to ignore them. I used to work in a shop in a busy shopping centre and the shop was on the top floor. A man came in once with his son and wasn't paying attention at all, a few minutes later he just narrowly caught his son before he had succeeded in climbing over the railings that look down on the bottom floor. It's also really annoying when the kids climb under displays and things and the parents don't correct them so you have to tell them that they cant do that because they might hurt themselves.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 216 ✭✭Snappy the Moose


    My friend Gerry came up with a good solution a few years back.

    He wanted to head out with the wife and friends to a bar but didn't want to bring the kids so just filled them with calpol to put them to sleep. When one of the girls woke up he just killed her and pretended she was abducted, problem solved.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,271 ✭✭✭annascott


    I think it is unfair that the original poster is being attacked for not having children and attending an exhibition!

    I think it is the responsibility of the parent/guardian to ensure that the child in their care is not causing annoyance to other people. Without this consideration, galleries, restaurants etc will soon ban babies and young children which spoils it for others whose children are well behaved. I get annoyed when a young baby/toddler is obviously agitated and upset and the mother just shruggs and mutters that the child is tired or hungry etc. If they knew that their child needs an afternoon feed or nap, why didn't they go out either before or after? Babies and young children need a routine. Stick to it.

    And before you ask, yes I did have a child, yes I did take him out with me and no he didn't run around, scream or cry.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 27,252 ✭✭✭✭stovelid


    What gets me is when I see a mother and her young kid in the shop and the mother is saying "OK, what sweets to you want?" And the kid starts picking bar after bar off the shelf.

    DON'T GIVE THE KID A CHOICE!!!

    We were only allowed a small amount of chocolate at the weekends as kids and it was usually a case of "You're getting chocolate buttons and that's that!" :pac:

    We're certainly grappling with all the burning parental issues here today.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 1,057 ✭✭✭TaraFoxglove


    stovelid wrote: »
    We're certainly grappling with all the burning parental issues here today.

    How very snide.

    I can tell you're a parent. Defensive response.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 13,422 ✭✭✭✭Bruthal


    later10 wrote: »
    It should have become pretty clear pretty fast in the original post, and other posters' responses. Ideally, we're expected to read more than just the thread title before responding.

    Title says "parents of children in public". But now you say you are not talking about that. No big deal.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 27,252 ✭✭✭✭stovelid


    How very snide.

    I can tell you're a parent.

    Being called out on talking shite is universal.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 1,057 ✭✭✭TaraFoxglove


    stovelid wrote: »
    Being called out on talking shite is universal.

    You think I was talking shíte. I don't think I was. It was a valid point, I think.

    *shrugs*


  • Registered Users Posts: 3,145 ✭✭✭LETHAL LADY


    To all those giving out about badly behaved children, has it ever occured to you that the child may have a medical condition or developmental disorder. I have an autistic newphew, which is not obvious when you see him. His mam told me about the comments she had to put up with when out shopping and eating out etc., which of course upset her terribly, people just assuming he was badly behaved. So maybe people should think about that before they pass judgement parents.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 13,422 ✭✭✭✭Bruthal


    later10 wrote: »
    Unfortunately, there will always be a more militant few who insist that children must be allowed almost anywhere they go, and that everyone else should just put up with any distraction that occurs.

    You might become more "militant" yourself when you have a child. Most parents do want to bring young babies anywhere they go. It could be even remotely possible you could be walking down the street with pram, and you see somewhere of interest, such as a gallery, and go in to have a look. But one thing is certain, it cant happen to you at the moment, or at anytime up to now. But you can judge others it does happen to at the moment.


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  • Closed Accounts Posts: 11,299 ✭✭✭✭later12


    robbie7730 wrote: »
    You might become more "militant" yourself when you have a child. Most parents do want to bring young babies anywhere they go.
    I'm not convinced. I have a niece and a nephew who only leave the house to play with their friends or go where they need to go. I think most reasonable parents, if given the choice, will not subject their very young children to art galleries, restaurants and coffee houses (for example); both for the childrens' sake and for the sake of the grown ups present. These are basic manners.

    There will always be some parents who genuinely cannot find an alternative or cannot afford a babysitter, but there will also be those parents who just don't care about manners and see it as reasonable that everyone else accomodate or defer to their screaming child. It is that latter group who are the subject of the thread.
    it cant happen to you at the moment, or at anytime up to now. But you can judge others it does happen to at the moment.
    Just because I'm not a parent (a) does not mean I have no experience of children, and (b) does not make my views any less valid. I am willing to take on board the difficulties of parents, but it seems that many parents are unwilling to consider the challenge their children pose to grown ups engaging in an adult space or an adult pursuit.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 13,972 ✭✭✭✭Zebra3


    stovelid wrote: »
    I'll be honest though and say another person's kid doing it somewhere like a supermarket would never bother me that much.

    Nobody is complaining about kids crying full stop. It's about them crying or running riot in adult enviroments and their parents not giving a fvck. I don't think people would considerate it a big deal a baby crying in a supermarket.
    robbie7730 wrote: »
    You might become more "militant" yourself when you have a child. Most parents do want to bring young babies anywhere they go. It could be even remotely possible you could be walking down the street with pram, and you see somewhere of interest, such as a gallery, and go in to have a look. But one thing is certain, it cant happen to you at the moment, or at anytime up to now. But you can judge others it does happen to at the moment.

    Again, I wouldn't have a problem with someone bringing a kid into a gallery, but like at a funeral, a responsible, considerate parent/minder would take them out if they started acting up.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 11,299 ✭✭✭✭later12


    To all those giving out about badly behaved children, has it ever occured to you that the child may have a medical condition or developmental disorder. I have an autistic newphew, which is not obvious when you see him. His mam told me about the comments she had to put up with when out shopping and eating out etc., which of course upset her terribly.
    Try, for a moment, to see that from a stranger's perspective.

    It would be unreasonable for a stranger to assume that every crying child, or every child throwing a tantrum, has an autistic spectrum disorder.

    Very often the difference between an autistic episode and a typical tantrum is very apparent, it often doesn't sound like a normal irritation. I heard Victoria White on the radio talking about this very issue recently, and really, unless the tantrum is particularly wild, I'm not sure how any passer by should reasonably presume that what is happening is the manifestation of a disability.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 13,422 ✭✭✭✭Bruthal


    later10 wrote: »
    Just because I'm not a parent (a) does not mean I have no experience of children, and (b) does not make my views any less valid. I am willing to take on board the difficulties of parents, but it seems that many parents are unwilling to consider the challenge their children pose to grown ups engaging in an adult space or an adult pursuit.


    I didnt say it does make your point any less valid, what i said was, up to now you are not going to be in a position of being somewhere with your own screaming child affecting others.

    Im not saying i completely disagree with what your saying either, all im saying is you may just see it from a slightly different point in time to come.


  • Registered Users Posts: 3,145 ✭✭✭LETHAL LADY


    later10 wrote: »
    Try, for a moment, to see that from a stranger's perspective.

    It would be unreasonable for a stranger to assume that every crying child, or every child throwing a tantrum, has an autistic spectrum disorder.

    Very often the difference between an autistic episode and a typical tantrum is very apparent, it often doesn't sound like a normal irritation. I heard Victoria White on the radio talking about this very issue recently, and really, unless the tantrum is particularly wild, I'm not sure how any passer by should reasonably presume that what is happening is the manifestation of a disability.

    And for that very reason perhaps we should not always be so harsh on judging parents, thats all I am saying, although I am not really referring to your own posts.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 28,964 ✭✭✭✭looksee


    I am a parent and a grandparent and I agree with the op. There is a good bit of trolling going on in this thread, people creating extreme situations to make a point. Of course children cry, and of course they are out in public. And it should be obvious that this is not about children, it is about their parents.

    On a bus or a train it can't be helped and it isn't a problem. But in an art gallery? I do not understand how a parent could give their full attention to the exhibits with a crying child beside them, and I certainly don't think that other people should have to put up with listening to it. If you take a child into that sort of environment, fine so long as the child is acting appropriately, but if they start racing round or screaming or generally causing a disturbance then the parents should remove him or her. Its called responsibility.

    If I went into an art gallery and started to play the bagpipes (I don't play the bagpipes ;)) I would be asked to stop. Why? Because I am disturbing the other patrons. But I should be allowed to do what I want when I want because I want to. In the same way that a parent 'wants' take a child into an inappropriate environment and allow it to do whatever it wants or what comes naturally.

    I have heard children wailing in supermarkets and it is perfectly obvious from the cry that they are exhausted and probably hungry, but the parent continues ambling round apparently unaware of the reason for the crying. I find this distressing, but not irritating - except that I want to tell the minder what the problem is. But you don't go into a supermarket for peace and relaxation, and people do have to take their children with them. However, if I am in an adult environment I don't expect to have to deal with other peoples' poor parenting skills.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 5,668 ✭✭✭nlgbbbblth


    Callan57 wrote: »
    Couldn't agree with you more. Children misbehaving is usually because they are utterly bored and/or overtired & parents put their own entertainment before the interests of their children. When I see parents dragging bored, tired and overwrought children around department stores or supermarkets I often feel like asking why they bothered having children if they are such an inconvenience to their lifestyle.

    So I should get a babysitter whenever I have to do the weekly shopping?

    :rolleyes:


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 13,422 ✭✭✭✭Bruthal


    looksee wrote: »
    On a bus or a train it can't be helped and it isn't a problem.
    If I went into an art gallery and started to play the bagpipes (I don't play the bagpipes ;)) I would be asked to stop. Why? Because I am disturbing the other patrons.

    You would be asked to stop on the above mentioned bus or train as well, hardly relevant comparing babies crying, to playing bagpipes.
    I have heard children wailing in supermarkets and it is perfectly obvious from the cry that they are exhausted and probably hungry, but the parent continues ambling round apparently unaware of the reason for the crying.

    Babysitter for shopping so?


  • Registered Users Posts: 1,071 ✭✭✭purplepanda


    Children going out in public places with many adults present need to have something to occupy themselves whilst there, crayons, reading ect; or they soon get bored & start craving attention. :D

    Best to take them out to the park or any other outdoors activity so using up their excess energy beforehand so they are relaxed later on for the above. :D

    Also talking about their trip out earlier in the day gets the point across that they are expected to behave well during certain events. :p

    All this is easy even for me to work out as the missus is a maternity nurse with decades of experience, but the more you know the more simple & / obvious it all becomes :eek:


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  • Registered Users Posts: 1,944 ✭✭✭fedor.2.


    The people who go to art galleries are the ones that annoy me, different strokes i suppose


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 11,299 ✭✭✭✭later12


    robbie7730 wrote: »
    Babysitter for shopping so?
    The poster clearly said:
    I find this distressing, but not irritating - except that I want to tell the minder what the problem is. But you don't go into a supermarket for peace and relaxation, and people do have to take their children with them.

    Nobody is criticising a parent (who has enough to be concerned about) for taking a child into Superquinn or Tesco for groceries. You expect to see families in there, you expect noise (to a certain degree) you generally get in and get out, not hang around for some deep thinking and relaxation.

    Even when we go to the park or to the beach, we expect families and young children, and if we find it hard to relax, we generally move to a quieter area.

    However galleries and museums and libraries are those quiet areas. Restaurants too are those quiet areas where we go to be with other adults, and stimulate our brains or simply relax with some food that somebody else has cooked - I'm sure parents appreciate this, and these rare moments of peace, more than anyone and are as upset as anyone when there are very small children making a racket.

    Therefore, that makes the action of those inconsiderate parents all the more difficult to understand.


  • Registered Users Posts: 1,944 ✭✭✭fedor.2.


    All this is easy even for me to work out as the missus is a maternity nurse with decades of experience, but the more you know the more simple & / obvious it all becomes :eek:[/QUOTE]

    How old is your wife??


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 11,299 ✭✭✭✭later12


    fedor.2. wrote: »
    The people who go to art galleries are the ones that annoy me, different strokes i suppose
    It doesn't have to be a gallery, the gallery was just an example of a quiet space for adults or children who understand the need to maintain a quietness (not necessariy silence of course)


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 27,252 ✭✭✭✭stovelid


    Are there really people that take young kids to art galleries?

    Surely it's a tailor-made location to drive them batshit: the enforced quiet and amount of things not to touch for starters.


  • Site Banned Posts: 5,676 ✭✭✭jayteecork


    I used work in bars and parents who bring their small children, let them run around supervised, while they get pissed should be annihilated.


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  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 13,972 ✭✭✭✭Zebra3


    jayteecork wrote: »
    I used work in bars and parents who bring their small children, let them run around supervised, while they get pissed should be annihilated.

    Would the manager not ask them to leave if they are annoying other customers?


  • Registered Users Posts: 156 ✭✭NomdePlume


    Children are never as annoying as annoying adults.

    The only time I ever felt annoyed by anyone in an art gallery was at an exhibition where some crone kept wandering the room making loud pretentious remarks on everything.
    Give me a whingeing child over that any day.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 11,299 ✭✭✭✭later12


    NomdePlume wrote: »
    Children are never as annoying as annoying adults.

    The only time I ever felt annoyed by anyone in an art gallery was at an exhibition where some crone kept wandering the room making loud pretentious remarks on everything.
    Give me a whingeing child over that any day.
    True but even if it is more annoying, there isn't a choice, and that doesn't make crying babies acceptable.

    The ideal is neither, and that adult oriented spaces might be engaged with in a respectful way. I think a lot of this comes down to adults respecting other adults, nobody is blaming the babies.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 17,689 ✭✭✭✭OutlawPete


    Certain complaints that have made here have been legitimate. Children running amok and going unsupervised in public places is not on. Screaming kids and the like should be removed if at all possible (cinemas, theaters, galleries etc) but sometimes it isn't of course possible to just removed yourself and a child from a situation (doctors or just queuing etc). Also, people bringing children to pubs and restaurants after 7pm should have a bit more cop on, or at the very least, be super aware and keep them on a far tighter leash than they would say if it were 2 or 3pm. As Snyper eluded to earlier, there is a big difference between complaining of children crying and making noise at the cinema at a 1pm screening, than there is of complaining of the same type of behavior at a late night screening. One is understandable, the other is not.

    In saying all that, members of the public can be selfish, narcissistic, sour faced cunts, who just will complain at the smallest of things regarding children and what they perceive to be 'bad parenting'. They are everywhere and they are a boil on the arse of humanity. I have been the carer of someone with autism (my sister) for almost 25 years now, since I was a child myself in fact and the kind of stuff that has been leveled at me by so called adults, has been nothing short of disgusting. Rolled eyes would be a Christmas present compared to the crap that we've dealt with while out in public places trying to live our lives. When I was younger I used to snap back, but you eventually get thick skinned, otherwise you'd be fighting with morons all day everyday.

    You may think that my situation is different to that which is being discussed here, but it isn't and the reason for that is because people do not know that my sister has autism, as she looks just looks just like anybody else (as many kids/adults with autism do in fact). Even today, as a 33 year old, you would just think she was just an average 12 year old and so, throughout all my years of being in public places together, what I experience is precisely what parents of normal kids experience when they have a bad day with their "normal" unruly children in public, when other people react badly to them. Only difference is, with most parents that might be 2 or 3% of the time they go out, with myself (and most other parents/siblings of someone with autism) it's almost every single day and every single time that they leave the house.

    Again, there are of course times when people have every right to expect some peace and quiet. They may very well have problems of their own to cope with and so when they go out, they should be entitled to expect to enjoy that time undisturbed by children screaming and acting up.

    However, people who complain, throw dirty looks and make judgmental comments about other parents, just because they see a child scream or throw a tantrum in a shop, cinema etc, in my mind .. are just arseholes, get over yourselves. Okay, so your day has been interrupted by noise that you would prefer went away or hadn't happened, but that doesn't give you the right to be prissy or obnoxious about it. If an adult is clearly doing their best to take care of a kid, but that child is still being wild or unruly, bear in mind that there could very well be more to why that child is behaving that way, than meets the eye. That adult or sibling may have spent the last week stuck indoors, going through the same crap (sometimes literately) and this trip to the shop, cinema, cafe etc has been there only refuge in that time, their only chance to get outside the house and so the last thing that they need is someone making things harder for them, with their selfish, ignorant reactions and attitudes to those situations. Of course, a small dose of 'minding your own bloody business' would go a long way too.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 27,252 ✭✭✭✭stovelid


    Wolfe Tone wrote: »
    I hate crying kids, little bastards should STFU. The parents are worse, continuing on with whatever they are doing not caring that their demon spawn is ruining everything for everyone else, whether thats a meal, or like what I experienced, peoples study in a bloody library. Leave the kids at home or in childcare if they can't stay quiet rather than making everyone else suffer.

    Blowing them up is always an option too.


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  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 13,972 ✭✭✭✭Zebra3


    OutlawPete wrote: »
    Certain complaints that have made here have been legitimate. Children running amach

    Yeah, I hate children running out. :pac:


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 5,389 ✭✭✭mattjack


    later10 wrote: »
    Because it is important that children develop strong reading skills. In most situations, children who are old enough to read are old enough to be socialised - I am talking about very young children, as I said in my OP, particularly those in prams and buggies. Except for when there are reading groups/ children's meetings, even children in libraries are asked to uphold quietness.

    I have a problem with this question, to be honest.

    Firstly, this is the internet, and ideally we ought to debate on a logical level. This isn't a children collecting competition, and I don't see how that can count for much anyway. You don't win a debate by having children. This is the same argument that says 'no vagina, no opinion' in relation to abortion.

    No, mattjack, as I have already said, I do not have children. I said I do understand that being a parent is a difficult role. Nevertheless it is not everybody else's job to accomodate young children in places that were not designed for baby's enjoyment.

    What do you want me to do, put my Mother on the telephone????

    I'm sure I did. But my parents didn't take me out to dinner or to exhibitions until I was old enough to learn to behave myself, and I knew that if I was loud or obnoxious, there would be consequences.

    No, but watching, understanding, and enjoying can demand a certain level of concentration to appreciate the technique or theme being employed.

    The same goes for libraries and museums, and that is why these are usually rather quiet places, it's hard to concentrate when young children are agitated and crying, as of course they can so easily be when they do not feel stimulated.

    I'm talking about babies at funerals. Particularly babies who don't know what's happening. Or, as another poster said, she would leave the funeral if her baby started crying, and obviously that sort of intervention would be welcomed by the other mourners, and it is a very considerate position to take.


    No. My problem with small babies in restaurants is that it can be hard to have a conversation when the baby (or babies) are crying. Whatever about galleries, which are either cheap or free of charge, this is one I find particularly hard to understand. If you can afford to eat in a nice restaurant, can you not also afford a babysitter?

    I would also find this annoying if I were a parent who did make the effort to get a babysitter and enjoy a night out, and then found myself near to a screaming child.
    Nobody said anything about babies not being allowed in the park, or at the seaside, as far as I have read. You appear to be inventing this.
    But I do like children. I want to be a Dad. It isn't a case of either believing that small children should be allowed anywhere 'or else you must hate children'. I just don't see what small babies need from galleries, restaurants and religious ceremonies.
    No, it will be my pension doing that - for which I am already paying heavily in terms of social contributions voluntary deductions. And it is childless adult's taxes which indiscriminately goes towards things like infrastructure, education, and childrens' allowance.

    I'm 24, I would consider myself too young for children, and again I don't hate children, I actually enjoy their energy and curiosity.

    plain ol, curiosity


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 5,389 ✭✭✭mattjack


    mattjack wrote: »
    plain ol, curiosity

    sorry...plain ol curiosity has me asking had you children...


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 2,347 ✭✭✭si_guru


    asshole wrote:
    I just don't see what small babies need from.. ..restaurants and religious ceremonies.

    To eat (to survive) and how exactly were YOU baptised?


  • Registered Users Posts: 1,071 ✭✭✭purplepanda


    fedor.2. wrote: »
    All this is easy even for me to work out as the missus is a maternity nurse with decades of experience, but the more you know the more simple & / obvious it all becomes :eek:

    How old is your wife??[/QUOTE]

    You should never mention a womans age :D

    Suffice to say that she has 25+ years of professional experience in that field & has cared for the offspring of prominent royality, & even some well known media types amongst her clients.

    Any more information & the tabliods will be parked up outside looking for her, she left for the far east today however ;)


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 27,252 ✭✭✭✭stovelid


    OutlawPete wrote: »

    In saying all that, members of the public can be selfish, narcissistic, sour faced cunts, who can complain at the smallest of things regarding children and what they perceive to be 'bad parenting'..

    Paradoxically, the people that are so vituperative about the mere presence of kids in public space are probably the most likely to be wholly inconsiderate of childless people when/if they become parents themselves.

    Basically, if you're the sort of the person that thinks about society purely in terms of your own convenience/needs, that will hardly magically change just because you do or don't have kids.

    Summed up in the oft-mentioned paradox of sitting around your fry-up expecting the world and their kids to creep around on tiptoe because you have a self-inflicted hangover.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 11,299 ✭✭✭✭later12


    si_guru wrote: »
    Originally Posted by asshole
    I just don't see what small babies need from.. ..restaurants and religious ceremonies.
    To eat (to survive) and how exactly were YOU baptised?
    Babies don't need to attend restaurants to eat, I don't think they're particularly interested. And I wasn't baptised, I did perfectly OK. Nevertheless I was talking about religious ceremonies that babies don't need to attend, not baptisms where they are The Big Cheese.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 13,972 ✭✭✭✭Zebra3


    You should never mention a womans age :D

    Suffice to say that she has 25+ years of professional experience in that field

    21 so. ;)


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 2,831 ✭✭✭genericguy


    in most places i can understand parents saying "fook it, i'll bring little johnnie, it'll save me some hassle". I don't approve, cos I couldn't give a fook about little johnny and his desire for a chocolate bar. however, i draw the line when inconsiderate fucks insist on bringing their crying snotty bastard on a plane. i can't understand how people can get thick when you ask them to shut ther child up on a flight - how can they be ignorant as to how annoying this is for other passengers?

    actually - i also remember a time when some oul hag started a row with me in the pub on a saturday because myself and my friends were laughing about santa claus and we were at risk of spoiling her child's christmas. at 7pm. in a pub. she said her child had as much right to enjoy the pub as had anyone else - even though the poor little shite had been sat in the corner crying for attention for 3 hours. bint.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 5,389 ✭✭✭mattjack


    genericguy wrote: »
    in most places i can understand parents saying "fook it, i'll bring little johnnie, it'll save me some hassle". I don't approve, cos I couldn't give a fook about little johnny and his desire for a chocolate bar. however, i draw the line when inconsiderate ****s insist on bringing their crying snotty bastard on a plane. i can't understand how people can get thick when you ask them to shut ther child up on a flight - how can they be ignorant as to how annoying this is for other passengers?

    maybe they have a reason for having their child on a flight...other than annoying passengers


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  • Closed Accounts Posts: 1,732 ✭✭✭Toby Take a Bow


    Also: the cinema? That's the worst place to bring kids!! It's based entirely on people being silent to enjoy it properly.

    My heart just sinks when you've bought your (overpriced) ticket, your (overpriced) popcorn and drink and sit down to watch a film and someone walks in with their young family. I have no problem if it's a film for kids, and you've gone for the morning showing, but last time it happened was at (I think) Thor, which must be at least 12s (or, I suppose, PG). Anyway, a guy walks in with a 5 year old and one a little older, and a 2 or 3 year old. As soon as the film started, the toddler started shouting WHO'S HE? WHAT'S HAPPENING? all the way until the film ended.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 27,252 ✭✭✭✭stovelid


    genericguy wrote: »
    however, i draw the line when inconsiderate ****s insist on bringing their crying snotty bastard on a plane. i can't understand how people can get thick when you ask them to shut ther child up on a flight - how can they be ignorant as to how annoying this is for other passengers?

    How do you suggest they take their kids to far destinations - for example, to see their grandparents if they're ex-pats? - ship them in a parcel ahead of them?


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 11,299 ✭✭✭✭later12


    stovelid wrote: »
    How do you suggest they take their kids to far destinations - for example, to see their grandparents if they're ex-pats? - ship them in a parcel ahead of them?
    If they're old enough to derive a benefit from the trip, surely they're old enough to understand their parents' warnings and respond accordingly.

    The poster referred to crying children, and those who are beyond reproach by other passengers in the eyes of the parents; not children generally.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 2,116 ✭✭✭Salty


    RachaelVO wrote: »
    But yes, these things will still happen in public, it's just a matter of knowing how to deal with it!
    stovelid wrote: »
    And by bad behaviour I don't mean toddlers making a bit of noise or crying.

    There is a huge difference between small children making noise and crying, and badly behaved children. The latter can be highly annoying as often, they tend to be bratty as well as loud.

    However, when it comes to small kids making noise just because they don't understand public etiquette, it's a different matter. And sometimes, parents don't deal with it properly.

    In some cases, it can be upsetting, tbh. Just last week, I was on break (I'm in 6th year), and my boyfriend came down to a shopping centre with me for a cup of tea. We were sitting in a cafe, having a chat and whatever, when we heard this child screaming hysterically from outside the cafe. He couldn't have been more than 2 years old, but he wasn't misbehaving or anything from what I could see; he actually seemed frightened. His mother was after walking away and leaving him screaming the place down, I could see her in front of a shop a few metres away. The child seemed to nearly begging for her to come back, and then she proceeded to make her way out of the main shopping centre into the hall where the elevators are (there's a multistorey carpark attached to the centre) leaving him there, screaming and terrified. :eek: I know that some parents use the whole "oh I'm leaving now" to spur their children into following them or whatever, but this was ridiculous. I don't know what the child could have done at that age to warrant being left alone like that. I was annoyed at the mother for leaving him in such a state, and felt upset about it. I was on the verge of tears listening to him. Eventually, he ran after her towards the elevators, but I could still hear him screaming.

    I'm aware that this is different to what the OP was talking about, and I agree that there are certain places that aren't child-friendly, and that parents should be more firm with there kids about their conduct in public. But this situation is just crazy. Obviously, children are welcome in shopping centres, but this mother took "teaching a lesson" way over the line!!


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 9,376 ✭✭✭metrovelvet


    stovelid wrote: »
    How do you suggest they take their kids to far destinations - for example, to see their grandparents if they're ex-pats? - ship them in a parcel ahead of them?

    Why do you bother responding? Its so not worth it.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 5,389 ✭✭✭mattjack


    later10 wrote: »
    If they're old enough to derive a benefit from the trip, surely they're old enough to understand their parents' warnings and respond accordingly.

    The poster referred to crying children, and those who are beyond reproach by other passengers in the eyes of the parents; not children generally.

    and if they were emigrating or travelling for a medical procedure.....


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 2,831 ✭✭✭genericguy


    later10 wrote: »
    If they're old enough to derive a benefit from the trip, surely they're old enough to understand their parents' warnings and respond accordingly.

    The poster referred to crying children, and those who are beyond reproach by other passengers in the eyes of the parents; not children generally.

    Thanks.

    Yep, I meant children who are so young as to understand the idea that they can't act the bollocks in public - these are invariably the type that derive no more pleasure from a trip/holiday than they would at home, thus I see them as an unnecessary inconvenience to other who have paid a large amount of money to travel in comfort.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 27,252 ✭✭✭✭stovelid


    later10 wrote: »

    The poster referred to crying children, and those who are beyond reproach by other passengers in the eyes of the parents; not children generally.

    I must open my eyes more on long-haul flights. I never really notice all the 9-15 year kids on flights with running noses crying their eyes out while their parents blithely shoot up, watch TV and read magazines.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 2,090 ✭✭✭BengaLover


    Blame the parents not the kids!
    I dont have a problem with crying babies, thats what they do, cant be helped, but parents who dont discipline or control their children in public are what get up my nose.
    some parents should make more of an effort to control their children so that they dont disturb others whilst travelling, in cinema etc, but lets not rememeber we were all kids once..


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  • Closed Accounts Posts: 11,299 ✭✭✭✭later12


    mattjack wrote: »
    and if they were emigrating or travelling for a medical procedure.....
    I don't have a particular problem with children going on holidays or boarding aircraft, I was just clarifying what another poster seemed to be saying. Also I'm not quite sure it would be reasonable that passengers should presume that a child on a flight is emigrating or going to say, Majorca, for medical reasons.

    In the case of aeroplanes, however, sometimes babies do need to be somewhere. And I would be far more concerned with parents who do not discipline their older and loud children on board aircrafts, it being an already tight and uncomfortable space and crying children who go ignored just make it unnecessarily uncomfortable.


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