Fromthetrees wrote: » Hmm, I think you are very wrong here, in the area of family law, would a woman be 'projecting their own insecurities about themselves' if they were being denied access to their child, really now? What about if their child was moved out of the country permanently and there is a fair chance they'll never see their child again, is that projecting? If the whole area of rights to children was switched tomorrow from being in favor of the woman to being in favor of the man I'm pretty sure you'll get a lot of woman and their associated organisations and movements to complain about equality quite loudly, and the thing is the'd be right, but if men do it they're being 'insecure about themselves', maybe it's they feel insecure about seeing their children, maybe.
FishBowel wrote: » They're only jealous because people who believe in God usually live longer than those who don't.
The King of Moo wrote: » I'm not talking about that at all. You're deliberately choosing one area in which men in Ireland and other countries are discriminated about, and assuming that I'm referring to that specifically when I talk about men projecting. Family law in Ireland does unfairly discriminate against men. It's something I've brought up on many occasions on different threads. It's why I mentioned in my previous post that men are discriminated against in some areas. I've no problem with a man complaining about being unfairly untreated in such a case. What I do have a problem with is the "we have it harder than you argument" from a minority of men who say things like "you can't be a man anymore, traditional maleness isn't valued, men are always portrayed as idiots, things have gone too far and feminazis have all the control" and try to argue that men are more discriminated against than women. It's those men who have insecurity issues, I believe. The law regarding fathers' rights here and elsewhere needs to be revised, yes. But overall, throughout the whole world, and to a lesser extent in the west, men have it a lot easier than women. It doesn't mean that men can't try to do anything about changing anti-male discrimination. But it does mean that men who complain about Boots' ads as though they're a real issue sound ludicrous, and do harm to men who genuinely want to effect change in the area of male discrimination.
Mardy Bum wrote: » There has been a crisis of masculinity for the past twenty years. Most men are terrified of losing a sense of self and end up blaming women for their own personal woes without ever examining themselves.
The King of Moo wrote: » I think that's all in people's heads. I've never felt like my identity has been in any kind of crisis. Where does this crisis come from? In practical terms, things haven't changed very much for men, except that we have less of an unearned, automatic position of power in professional, social and familial terms. That's only fair. But we don't have it bad at all.
Duggys Housemate wrote: » This is a modern leftist argument which ignores old left wing arguments, which argued that most men - workers - were powerless. I go with the latter idea not the former.
The King of Moo wrote: » That's true to an extent, but most women were powerless too. Political and economic power was mostly wielded by a small number of men. But in terms of the family unit, men still had a lot of power, even if they had none in the workplace. And they usually wouldn't be hidden away and locked up if they got a single woman pregnant. Society was still heavily gendered, and favoured men more than women. Now power's a bit more evenly distributed in every sense.
bee_keeper wrote: » so you dont think their is a drive to undermine traditional masculine traits and to try and feminise men nowadays ?
Duggys Housemate wrote: » In gender, maybe. In class, not at all. Power evened out mid 20th century but is careering back to being highly concentrated. One thing I have to say about power is this - it is not averaged out. Although I agree that all men were better positioned in the past, given family roles and sex and pregnancy, this is not the same as men being more powerful on average. men are still more powerful on average, but most men have no power. Its just some have lots.
The King of Moo wrote: » At least say "I think that in the west there's a drive to undermine traditional masculine traits and feminise men." That'd still be wrong, of course, and there's no simple set of traditional masculine traits, and even if there were, there's still no drive to undermine them and feminise men. It's all in your head.
Galwayguy35 wrote: » Really? It works both ways. I've lost count of the amount of man bashing threads I've seen on internet forums where women are blaming men for everything and giving out about how tough they have it.
garysully1986 wrote: » Yeah you could also say that most rock music is about being broken hearted, being in love or drugs, or how much you can observe in the local pub of a saturday night. You can use these stereotypical views on every form of music, Emo is all suicidal music and kids who want to rebel against the world. Chances are you are picking the worst parts of the genre and using that as what all hip hop represents. There are poets in every genre, Just because you havent heard them doesnt mean they dont exist.
I wrote a rythme Rosemary and thyme Called up my ho Its freaky time.
Duggys Housemate wrote: » Actually, its hardly in his head. Nor is it as powerful as force as he says, but there are academics who claim that gender is a total and social construct and what they mean in reality is that maleness is a construct. They generally complain about male traits. However that is not so powerful outside the academy.
There are other indications that men are less manly than the past. None of us have time machines, and very few people here are old enough to remember, but it seems that in the sixties, and seventies work was more masculine, and tougher, if we are to believe Mad Men and Life On Mars etc. These period pieces work for a reason, a nostalgia for a different past. Whether that past is good, or bad is open to dispute, but that things are different is not. This change in the general culture is different from the Romantics, and New Romantics, both reacting as a counter culture to a more masculine culture. The New Romantics are set around the time of Life of Mars, the Romantics were a tiny group who were surrounded by a society of universal and daily male drunkenness, fighting and duelling.
The King of Moo wrote: » I think that's all in people's heads. I've never felt like my identity has been in any kind of crisis. Where does this crisis come from? In practical terms, things haven't changed very much for men, except that we have less of an unearned, automatic position of power in professional, social and familial terms. That's only fair. But we don't have it bad at all. I think every generation feels it's going through a crisis of masculinity. People nowadays look at clothes shops and some young people and think "Bloody hell! Look at the state of that, they're not real men!" But objectively, I think masculinity's doing just fine.
Originally Posted by The King of MooNever in the history of civilization has maleness been seen by the majority as a weakness or as less worthy than being female.We have it easy overall, and always have. Just because society is a little more equal overall and men blacks are negatively discriminated against in a small number of situations, doesn't mean that men blacks are treated like second-class citizens overall. This may or may not be an unpopular opinion, but I believe that many men blacks who complain ad nauseum about discrimination against men blacks are projecting their own insecurities about themselves.
Fromthetrees wrote: » I deliberately picked one area in which men are discriminated against because I actually know a little bit about it, it's also such an important area, to the point that it is one of the biggest things in some men's lives. Family law is also a very broad area, it isn't just about actual custody. I could easily say that men are discriminated against when it comes to childcare, paternity leave, insurance, suicide prevention, domestic violence, prisons, dying younger, gender quotas and many more areas I would guess. Let me show exactly why I think you are so off the money and you deserve to be called out on it... ...now you can easily counter that by saying men had too much power and things are just balancing themselves out now, but is that really true? and more importantly does that make it right? I'm talking in the context of Ireland today, not any other country at any point in time.
The King of Moo wrote: » I don't think that discrimination against men has to be part of balancing out power relations. I don't think it should be part of the more even distribution of power. And I don't think that discrimination against men is a necessary spin-off of feminism. I don't think anyone would say it's ok for men to be discriminated against. But I think that overall, discrimination against men is not as severe as that suffered by women historically and at the moment, taking the whole world into account. That doesn't mean men shouldn't complain about discrimination at all. I just hate when people whinge that men have it harder than women. Overall, we don't, and such whinging does a disservice to people who actually work to end discrimination, against anyone. Such whingers make things into a contest: "We're more discriminated against than you!" It shouldn't be like that: personally I don't like any negative discrimination against particular groups, be they men, women, immigrants etc. So to answer your question, no, I don't think it's right that men are discriminated against in many ways in Ireland at the moment. I also don't think that this discrimination is necessarily an offshoot of the more equal gender relations we now enjoy.
It doesn't make sense to me that that would be the case, seeing as most of the people in positions of real power in this country are men.
The King of Moo wrote: » I don't think that discrimination against men has to be part of balancing out power relations. I don't think it should be part of the more even distribution of power. And I don't think that discrimination against men is a necessary spin-off of feminism. I don't think anyone would say it's ok for men to be discriminated against. But I think that overall, discrimination against men is not as severe as that suffered by women historically and at the moment, taking the whole world into account. That doesn't mean men shouldn't complain about discrimination at all. I just hate when people whinge that men have it harder than women. Overall, we don't, and such whinging does a disservice to people who actually work to end discrimination, against anyone. Such whingers make things into a contest: "We're more discriminated against than you!" It shouldn't be like that: personally I don't like any negative discrimination against particular groups, be they men, women, immigrants etc. So to answer your question, no, I don't think it's right that men are discriminated against in many ways in Ireland at the moment. I also don't think that this discrimination is necessarily an offshoot of the more equal gender relations we now enjoy. It doesn't make sense to me that that would be the case, seeing as most of the people in positions of real power in this country are men.
Fromthetrees wrote: » I just get the impression that you think men somehow have it easier than woman in Ireland today, that's definitively open for debate and open to interpretation but it is not at all clear cut. I think I've given a pretty long and broad list in which ways men are actively discriminated against in Ireland today. It most certainly is not about "We're more discriminated against than you!", it is about simple equality and basic fairness. If a woman/homosexual or black cries discrimination than any opposition to it is met with fervor, and rightly so. If a man cries discrimination he is met by many with open hostility, which is what I perceived you were doing, that's what I can't get my head around. This is a very interesting subject and can easily be explained without using the word 'discrimination'. Warren Farrell; The trade-offs include working more hours and for more years; taking technical or more-hazardous jobs; relocating overseas or traveling overnight. Why Men Earn More are the importance of assessing trade-offs; that "the road to high pay is a toll road;" the "Pay Paradox" (that "pay is about the power we forfeit to get the power of pay"), he documents 25 differences in men and women’s work-life choices, never-married women without children earn 13% more than their male counterparts; or that the gender pay gap is largely about married men with children who earn more due to their assuming more workplace obligations. Essentially men earn more because they work more, men have more money, woman have more balanced lives. This makes sense to me anyway. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jIo-EHQqSFo
Fromthetrees wrote: » I just get the impression that you think men somehow have it easier than woman in Ireland today, that's definitively open for debate and open to interpretation but it is not at all clear cut. I think I've given a pretty long and broad list in which ways men are actively discriminated against in Ireland today. It most certainly is not about "We're more discriminated against than you!", it is about simple equality and basic fairness. If a woman/homosexual or black cries discrimination than any opposition to it is met with fervor, and rightly so. If a man cries discrimination he is met by many with open hostility, which is what I perceived you were doing, that's what I can't get my head around. This is a very interesting subject and can easily be explained without using the word 'discrimination'. Warren Farrell; The trade-offs include working more hours and for more years; taking technical or more-hazardous jobs; relocating overseas or traveling overnight. Why Men Earn More are the importance of assessing trade-offs; that "the road to high pay is a toll road;" the "Pay Paradox" (that "pay is about the power we forfeit to get the power of pay"), he documents 25 differences in men and women’s work-life choices, never-married women without children earn 13% more than their male counterparts; or that the gender pay gap is largely about married men with children who earn more due to their assuming more workplace obligations.
The King of Moo wrote: » A long, meandering post, which goes off on a slight tangent about one third of the way through, without getting back to the original main point and neglecting to address the main point made in the post it quotes
Deleted User wrote: » Boards should limit messages to 256 characters.