So you're in Woodies just as a Zombie attack begins....

magick · 01-04-2008 05:02PM #1

What is the first object you go for to protect yourself?

Id go with an axe because unlike a chainsaw it doesnt need petrol, and i can axe my though doors,zombies, and people who get in my way.....

KTRIC · 01-04-2008 05:03PM

I'd go for the cordless sanders and some white emulsion. I've been meaning to paint those stairs for a while.

rejkin · 01-04-2008 05:06PM

ah if i was in woodies when that happened id prob stay there,theres enough things there to keep me protected there for ages

Nerin · 01-04-2008 05:07PM

used to work in woodies...
there was a gardening knife like this
http://www.arborlab.com.au/images/1/11.jpg

i'd grab two of them
and this gardening scythe dealy too.
http://tbn0.google.com/images?q=tbn:hUAAWQ-HtJg_BM:http://im.edirectory.co.uk/p/955/i/scythe1.jpg

awesome.

TEH REAL CDP · 01-04-2008 05:08PM

the unhelpful inanimate sales assistants. pick them up and use them as a striking object. you can also throw them at people.

Ruu_Old · 01-04-2008 05:10PM

A garden shed to hide in.

orestes · 01-04-2008 05:15PM

A nail-gun. Not one of those little ones, one of those big mutha fcuker one's like the one Bateman had in American Psycho that has it's own gas cannister.

Eat metal spikes you zombie basterds!

FunkZ · 01-04-2008 05:16PM

I'd hide on top of Ruus shed who while throwing hammers at them. Protect the fort!

Nerin · 01-04-2008 05:19PM

forklift ftw

biko · 01-04-2008 05:19PM

I'd run over to the spirit levels and drink them all.
The zombs are not getting me sober!

orestes · 01-04-2008 05:20PM

FunkZ wrote: »

I'd hide on top of Ruus shed who while throwing hammers at them. Protect the fort!

Can I join you up there with my nail-gun? We gotta stick together if we're gonna make it through this!

Nerin · 01-04-2008 05:23PM

orestes wrote: »

Can I join you up there with my nail-gun? We gotta stick together if we're gonna make it through this!

*lifts Ruu, fort and defenders onto top shelf with forklift*
better protection guys.
*drives off on killing spree*

Voodu Child · 01-04-2008 05:24PM

Those attachments for your shoes with spikes in them, for aerating your lawn.

Combined with my famous Chuck Norris-stylee roundhouse kicks, that would pretty much be the end of the zombies :cool:

FunkZ · 01-04-2008 05:25PM

Lads with nailguns shooting out of sheds on top of forklifts we could possibly be the new A-Team!

We can throw paint at them to make the whole thing humorous as well. I'm hoping the zombies are Shaun of the Dead style!

Fremen · 01-04-2008 05:27PM

Are these fast-moving zombies (28 days later), or the more conventional kind?
WD40 all over the floor might work pretty well against fast-moving zombies.

Nerin · 01-04-2008 05:29PM

make a perimeter around the fort with garden furniture,bbqs and lighter fluid.

Tar.Aldarion · 01-04-2008 05:31PM

Rail gun.

FunkZ · 01-04-2008 05:32PM

Is the attack starting outside or inside? Cause if it's outside ya could just order a pizza, film it and stick it on YouTube, those zombies ain't getting in here!

Davidius · 01-04-2008 05:33PM

Reminds me of Dead Rising.

keefg · 01-04-2008 05:33PM

magick wrote: »

What is the first object you go for......

The fecking door....as fast as my legs could carry me. I wouldn't stop running/swimming until I hit France.

Oh mind you, depends on what type of Zombies they are.....if they're those slow George Romero ones, then no problem, finish your shopping and take a nice stroll back to your car.

On the other hand, if they're the zombies from 28 days later then I would probably use the few short seconds before I die to soil myself.

Drift · 01-04-2008 05:38PM

1. Woodies has a large BBQ section

2. Zombies are not human

Surely I'm not the only one wondering what a zombie burger tastes like???

Abi · 01-04-2008 05:39PM

FunkZ wrote: »

Is the attack starting outside or inside?

Pff. Where is your sense of adventure?

I bags the water-butt.

smemon · 01-04-2008 05:56PM

clothes line & chainsaw.

tie the two ends of the clothes line to something. tie the chainsaw to the clothes line, start it up pointing down and let it fly along the clothes line, obviously when the zombies are right where you want them

FunkZ · 01-04-2008 06:00PM

Abigayle wrote: »

Pff. Where is your sense of adventure?

I bags the water-butt.

"Here come zombies"
"Excellent, tell them to wait there while I put on my Indiana Jones costume"

They're probably just going to 'attack' the awesome sales* in Woodies at the moment?

*Woodies don't actually have sales, terms and conditions need not apply :pac:

the_syco · 01-04-2008 06:17PM

Gas cylinders, fertilizer, spirits, and a nail gun. Take out most of the ****ers, with the explosions, than nail off the remainder.

Drift · 01-04-2008 06:20PM

Will you all stop killing my zombies in such explosive high temperature ways. It's RUINING the taste of the burgers. :mad:

The Real B-man · 01-04-2008 06:23PM

White Spirits & Matches!

01-04-2008 06:27PM

I wouldn't be in Woodies when a zombie attack begins, I'd be in my fortress far far away :pac:

But to answer the question, I wouldn't use an axe. I'd use some sort of machete or sword (something very sharp, an axe requires too much of a swing so you might get caught if you mis-swing) - something with enough reach so that I wouldn't get bitten. Nail gun sounds good but it depends on how many zombies there are, plus whether the nail gun would go through the skull or just stay in the front of the temple.

niceonetom · 01-04-2008 06:34PM

chainsaw...

...on a stick.

zuroph · 01-04-2008 06:45PM

the till.

01-04-2008 06:49PM

The problem with a chainsaw is that the zombie flesh might go splat everywhere, and you risk ingesting some zombie pieces. Plus you have to go for the head.

So you're in Woodies just as a Zombie attack begins....

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