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The Cooking Disaster Thread

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13567…14

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    #62
    rubadub
    Registered Users Posts: 32,373 ✭✭✭✭rubadub


    If stuff ends up too spicy I would freeze it in small batches, and it can be used in future as a hot sauce itself. i.e. if you added twice too much you could make an identical dish again, minus the chilli, add in the strong stuff and then it is all evened out.

    I hate throwing stuff out
    5unflower wrote: »

    272535.jpg

    It should have been some lovely coconut biscuits :o
    I would have eaten those no bother! big pint of cold milk with them.


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    #63
    decisions
    Closed Accounts Posts: 8,207 ✭✭✭decisions


    rubadub wrote: »
    If stuff ends up too spicy I would freeze it in small batches, and it can be used in future as a hot sauce itself. i.e. if you added twice too much you could make an identical dish again, minus the chilli, add in the strong stuff and then it is all evened out.

    I hate throwing stuff out


    I would have eaten those no bother! big pint of cold milk with them.

    I think I would have only needed a teaspoon of it, and if it was in the freezer a drunk me would have attempted to re heat it at some stage forgetting that it was so hot :P


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    #64
    BaZmO*
    Registered Users Posts: 18,625 ✭✭✭✭BaZmO*


    Many moons ago as a young whippersnapper I decided to make some Christmas Cookies from a recipe in a book I'd gotten from the library. I think they were in the shape of Christmas trees.

    I was chuffed with myself when making them. I was allowed measure and mix all the ingredients myself and just got my mum to put them in the oven for me. Unfortunately what came out of the oven was totally inedible and I almost got sick when tasting them.

    What I thought were Christmas "Cookies" were in fact Christmas "Decorations" and the reason why they tasted so awful was because the recipe called for something like two cups of salt instead of sugar. :o
    Presumably the salt was there to act as a preservative.


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    #65
    seosamh1980
    Closed Accounts Posts: 1,126 ✭✭✭seosamh1980


    kylith wrote: »
    I once tried to make a pie crust with self raising flour.

    I recently tried to bake bread in a slow cooker. It took two hours for the bottom to cook while the top remained a doughy mess. It sank to about an inch thick and was terribly dense. The dough had turned out really well too, I felt like a monster for wasting it.

    Why did you try to do it in the slow cooker can I ask? Most breads just need a really hot oven to make them rise and most cook pretty quickly, wouldn't have thought a slow cooker would add anything to it.

    With melting chocolate, even adding water will stop it going rock hard, just a drop before melting. If you don't want to add cream or butter etc, but feck it if eating dessert might as well have one of them too :)


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    #66
    shootermacg
    Registered Users Posts: 4,833 ✭✭✭shootermacg


    A mate once told me, his girlfriend burned the rice. I commiserated, until he told me she didn't add water. Another spoilt bitch who let momma do all her cooking. How these people don't starve to death in Uni is anyone's guess ^ ^


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    #67
    Madame K
    Registered Users Posts: 125 ✭✭Madame K


    In college my friend and I were making brownies but the only vegetable oil we had was extra virgin olive oil.

    They baked up lovely, smelled amazing, tasted like broken promises. Horrible.


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    #68
    oscarBravo
    Technology & Internet Moderators Posts: 28,791 Mod ✭✭✭✭oscarBravo


    shootermacg wrote: »
    How these people don't starve to death in Uni is anyone's guess ^ ^
    Pot Noodles.


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    #69
    emeraldstar
    Registered Users Posts: 5,383 ✭✭✭emeraldstar


    shootermacg wrote: »
    A mate once told me, his girlfriend burned the rice. I commiserated, until he told me she didn't add water. Another spoilt bitch who let momma do all her cooking. How these people don't starve to death in Uni is anyone's guess ^ ^
    oscarBravo wrote: »
    Pot Noodles.

    Even Pot Noodle needs water added :eek:


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    #70
    Hootanany
    Registered Users Posts: 5,477 ✭✭✭Hootanany


    Clams in Vermouth & garlic spaghetti
    Looked the business one full chilli as well?
    I did not realise it was a Scotch Bonnet.

    Major ring sting.


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    #71
    Michellenman
    Registered Users Posts: 11,195 ✭✭✭✭Michellenman


    Not sure if it counts as a cooking disaster but just set my boyfriends oven gloves on fire. Damn it.


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    #72
    Cork selfbuild
    Registered Users Posts: 649 ✭✭✭Cork selfbuild


    Trying to impress my new GF being all fancy pantsy, tried to make pavlova...

    A brown swamp is all that came out of the oven 3 times, couldn't figure it out, she wasn't supposed to know but saw them in the bin, at least I got an A for effort... :rolleyes:

    She also saw the box, when I gave in and bought one at the farmers market! Didn't hide it well enough!


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    #73
    Billy86
    Closed Accounts Posts: 23,495 ✭✭✭✭Billy86


    DIT: Wrong thread, I was proud of this! :P


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    #74
    BaZmO*
    Registered Users Posts: 18,625 ✭✭✭✭BaZmO*


    Billy86 wrote: »
    Rare/medium-rare steak with pepper sauce on top of mashed potato with a small bit of red chaddar and carrot (ran through the cheese grater and quickly boiled to make it soft). Stuffed mushrooms, cherry tomatoes, and a small rocket/carrot/feta/asparagus salad on the side. Yummy!

    FILE0006.jpg

    While it's probably a disaster in the presentation, are you sure you have the right thread? ;)


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    #75
    Cork selfbuild
    Registered Users Posts: 649 ✭✭✭Cork selfbuild


    Billy86 wrote: »
    Rare/medium-rare steak with pepper sauce on top of mashed potato with a small bit of red chaddar and carrot (ran through the cheese grater and quickly boiled to make it soft). Stuffed mushrooms, cherry tomatoes, and a small rocket/carrot/feta/asparagus salad on the side. Yummy!

    http://s15.postimg.org/9x7d0abbv/FILE0006.jpg

    Looks very undisastrous!


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    #76
    Cork selfbuild
    Registered Users Posts: 649 ✭✭✭Cork selfbuild


    BaZmO* wrote: »
    While it's probably a disaster in the presentation, are you sure you have the right thread? ;)

    But the Tomatoes and the stuffed mushrooms are all symmetrical! :D


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    #77
    Billy86
    Closed Accounts Posts: 23,495 ✭✭✭✭Billy86


    Wrong thread, damn you 25 tabs!!


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    #78
    kylith
    Registered Users Posts: 17,736 ✭✭✭✭kylith


    seosamh1980 wrote: »
    Why did you try to do it in the slow cooker can I ask? Most breads just need a really hot oven to make them rise and most cook pretty quickly, wouldn't have thought a slow cooker would add anything to it.

    Firstly it was simple curiosity, I'd heard you could do it and then just brown the crust under the grill and I wanted to give it a try.

    Secondly, my oven is banjaxed. I put a loaf in the oven at the same time as I had one in the slow cooker. It was at top heat and after 2 hours was still terribly pale. I couldn't wait any longer so I took it out, it was still doughy in the middle.


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    #79
    Vojera
    Closed Accounts Posts: 2,812 ✭✭✭Vojera


    I once put rashers too close to the grill and set them on fire. Then I panicked and sprayed the bejesus out of them with the fire extinguisher. If I had just closed the door of the oven they'd have been saved.


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    #80
    hardCopy
    Registered Users Posts: 5,969 ✭✭✭hardCopy


    Vojera wrote: »
    I once put rashers too close to the grill and set them on fire. Then I panicked and sprayed the bejesus out of them with the fire extinguisher. If I had just closed the door of the oven they'd have been saved.

    The only kitchen fire I ever produced was caused by closing the door while grilling.


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    #81
    Vojera
    Closed Accounts Posts: 2,812 ✭✭✭Vojera


    hardCopy wrote: »
    The only kitchen fire I ever produced was caused by closing the door while grilling.

    Then I'm going to consider the sacrifice of bacon to the fire extinguisher gods a good investment :)


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    #82
    Layinghen
    Registered Users Posts: 1,552 ✭✭✭Layinghen


    Only found this thread today. It is fantastic haven't laughed so much in ages. Unfortunately can relate a lot to mixing up teaspoon and tablespoon measurements.


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    #83
    Loire
    Registered Users Posts: 2,034 ✭✭✭Loire


    I do all the cooking at our place (God love them) and we also have an au pair with us who couldn't boil an egg. Anyway, I made a pasta bake for the kids lunch (tomato, cheese and cream bake) and also some carrot & corriander soup that I made from scratch myself - both are yummy.

    I came home and asked the au pair if the kids ate lunch.

    "No" says she "..they didn't like the new pasta sauce".

    "What sauce?" says I....

    "The carrot & corriander sauce" says she.

    I bit my lip and LMAO later when I told herself! :D


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    #84
    iverjohnston
    Closed Accounts Posts: 1,242 ✭✭✭iverjohnston


    Those of you who do not get The Farmers Journal every week, (shame on you!) may not realise that they regularly feature recipes . NevanMaguire often contributes. He published a Christmas cake recipe about 5 years ago, and one evening I decided to give it a whirl. All went well until it instructed to "cream" the butter. I had no idea what to do, so as a last resort , I rang his restaurant to ask. I got a relative, and she was highly amused, but went down to the kitchen to ask the chef . On telling me what to do, she asked when was I baking the cake . When I told her I was in the middle of the process, she started laughing and told me that my wife would be very impressed. I didn't know what was so funny to her, but soon found out after putting the mix into tin oven and checking the baking time.
    Had to set the alarm clock for 4am !


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    #85
    seosamh1980
    Closed Accounts Posts: 1,126 ✭✭✭seosamh1980


    Iver I'm intrigued :) Had you done much baking previously? Creaming butter and sugar together is a very common instruction in cakes. Laughing at the idea of ringing the restaurant about it, fair play ha :)


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    #86
    Layinghen
    Registered Users Posts: 1,552 ✭✭✭Layinghen


    iverjohnston wrote: »
    Those of you who do not get The Farmers Journal every week, (shame on you!) may not realise that they regularly feature recipes . NevanMaguire often contributes. He published a Christmas cake recipe about 5 years ago, and one evening I decided to give it a whirl. All went well until it instructed to "cream" the butter. I had no idea what to do, so as a last resort , I rang his restaurant to ask. I got a relative, and she was highly amused, but went down to the kitchen to ask the chef . On telling me what to do, she asked when was I baking the cake . When I told her I was in the middle of the process, she started laughing and told me that my wife would be very impressed. I didn't know what was so funny to her, but soon found out after putting the mix into tin oven and checking the baking time.
    Had to set the alarm clock for 4am !

    Brilliant :D


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    #87
    iverjohnston
    Closed Accounts Posts: 1,242 ✭✭✭iverjohnston


    seosamh1980 wrote: »
    Iver I'm intrigued :) Had you done much baking previously? Creaming butter and sugar together is a very common instruction in cakes. Laughing at the idea of ringing the restaurant about it, fair play ha :)

    Well I suppose I an a typical farmer, in that I won't starve anytime soon . But never made a cake before. Roasts and spuds and gravy etc, 100%. But that threw me .

    Anyway, if some gosson from Blacklion can do it, so can I !


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    #88
    Billy86
    Closed Accounts Posts: 23,495 ✭✭✭✭Billy86


    Vojera wrote: »
    I once put rashers too close to the grill and set them on fire. Then I panicked and sprayed the bejesus out of them with the fire extinguisher. If I had just closed the door of the oven they'd have been saved.
    This actually just reminded me... can anyone explain how rashers under the grill always seem to not only stick to the bars of griddle-yolkey like glue (which never happens with the rest of the breakfast), but also invariably manage to become hotter than the surface of the sun?


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    #89
    seosamh1980
    Closed Accounts Posts: 1,126 ✭✭✭seosamh1980


    iverjohnston wrote: »
    Well I suppose I an a typical farmer, in that I won't starve anytime soon . But never made a cake before. Roasts and spuds and gravy etc, 100%. But that threw me .

    Anyway, if some gosson from Blacklion can do it, so can I !

    That was a serious challenge to start with, a Christmas cake!


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    #90
    decisions
    Closed Accounts Posts: 8,207 ✭✭✭decisions


    Made a mess of my cooking club recipie last night :o

    I'll throw up the details when my recipie goes up on Friday.


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    #91
    Tabitharose
    Registered Users Posts: 940 ✭✭✭Tabitharose


    iverjohnston wrote: »
    Well I suppose I an a typical farmer, in that I won't starve anytime soon . But never made a cake before. Roasts and spuds and gravy etc, 100%. But that threw me .

    Anyway, if some gosson from Blacklion can do it, so can I !

    gotta ask, how did the cake turn out? great story :)


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