The Online Dating Thread 3..READ 1ST POST Oct 2012

dub5 · 16-06-2012 3:24pm

Ok, I am just about to start mailing. Just to point out, I will be mailing people that I fancy etc, as if I am putting effort into this and they reply, I may as well be mailing half decent people, just in case something comes out of it!!!;)

Galvasean · 16-06-2012 3:26pm

dub5 wrote: »

Ok, I am just about to start mailing. Just to point out, I will be mailing people that I fancy etc, as if I am putting effort into this and they reply, I may as well be mailing half decent people, just in case something comes out of it!!!;)

I will be personally devastated if I don't make the 'half decent' grade :pac:

sharper · 16-06-2012 3:34pm

I think this a bit like the rich man envying the simple life of the poor man and the poor man envying the material wealth of the rich man.

Which you identify with and value more is really a reflection of your own experiences. Men love the idea of getting a lot of attention without having to do anything because it's the direct opposite of their normal experience. Women like the idea of it being more acceptable for them to make the first move and getting less of a "Huh? What's going on here?" type response.

Personally I don't particularly like "hi hows u" type crap from people I'm not interested in nor do I like seeing someone I think I'd get along with, taking a bit of time to write a message and then getting nothing or a "Oh thanks for dropping by, see you" type response.

We all want to meet someone that's right for us, we're all basically in the same boat in that regard.

Varied · 16-06-2012 3:40pm

Bit wary about tonight

I've only ever met someone off the Internet once but I knew her pretty well. This is a complete stranger. Gah!

dub5 · 16-06-2012 4:03pm

Varied wrote: »

Bit wary about tonight

I've only ever met someone off the Internet once but I knew her pretty well. This is a complete stranger. Gah!

Good luck tonight. Sure its a night out anyway, even if it is a disaster.

Galvasean wrote: »

I will be personally devastated if I don't make the 'half decent' grade :pac:

Ok, I have mailed 10 men. It was hard going even picking out that many. You might make it into the next 10:D

Daveysil15 · 16-06-2012 4:12pm

dub5 wrote: »

Good luck tonight. Sure its a night out anyway, even if it is a disaster.

Ok, I have mailed 10 men. It was hard going even picking out that many. You might make it into the next 10:D

Ok I'm finished. 20 women. I've had 2 reply's so far, including yourself.

smallgarden · 16-06-2012 4:19pm

Aww I missed the cut! Devastated;)

dub5 · 16-06-2012 4:39pm

Daveysil15 wrote: »

Ok I'm finished. 20 women. I've had 2 reply's so far, including yourself.

I didnt reply to you!!!

First Analysis ...... The man finished mailing before the woman did. Does this mean that the man did not put as much thought into the mails as the woman did

Galvasean · 16-06-2012 4:43pm

dub5 wrote: »

First Analysis ...... The man finished mailing before the woman did. Does this mean that the man did not put as much thought into the mails as the woman did

Perhaps he has different (I hesitate to use 'lower') standards? Perhaps there are more good female profiles out there than male ones? It could be any one (or more than likely a combination) of many things. Unless we got to inspect each mail from both parties and the profiles they messaged in fine detail we can only speculate.

Daveysil15 · 16-06-2012 4:50pm

Or maybe I'm just a fast typer!

dub5 · 16-06-2012 5:09pm

Ok, I am done. 20 males have been mailed. Apologies to anyone on here that didnt make the cut but if I dont get any replies from the 20, I might consider you guys

Devastated I didnt get a mail from a mail from Davey

G-Money · 16-06-2012 5:12pm

dub5 wrote: »

Ok, I am done. 20 males have been mailed. Apologies to anyone on here that didnt make the cut but if I dont get any replies from the 20, I might consider you guys

Devastated I didnt get a mail from a mail from Davey

Booo, I wasn't included in your survey!

dub5 · 16-06-2012 5:15pm

G-Money wrote: »

dub5 wrote: »

Ok, I am done. 20 males have been mailed. Apologies to anyone on here that didnt make the cut but if I dont get any replies from the 20, I might consider you guys

Devastated I didnt get a mail from a mail from Davey

Booo, I wasn't included in your survey!

Ah sorry, maybe you are outside my age bracket that I go for!!!

sharper · 16-06-2012 5:24pm

dub5 wrote: »

if I dont get any replies from the 20, I might consider you guys

Finally! See I knew this day had to come!

herisson · 16-06-2012 5:40pm

Varied wrote: »

Bit wary about tonight

I've only ever met someone off the Internet once but I knew her pretty well. This is a complete stranger. Gah!

Good Luck tonight!!

Hope it goes well for ya!!

Galvasean · 16-06-2012 5:45pm

dub5 wrote: »

if I dont get any replies from the 20, I might consider you guys

dub5 · 16-06-2012 6:05pm

Galvasean wrote: »

dub5 wrote: »

if I dont get any replies from the 20, I might consider you guys

If all the men could pm me their link I would gladly take a look at you all....lol

Larianne · 16-06-2012 6:10pm

Varied wrote: »

Bit wary about tonight

I've only ever met someone off the Internet once but I knew her pretty well. This is a complete stranger. Gah!

You'll be grand. Remember she will probably be just as nervous!!! Just have a few conversation starters in your head ready. Have fun!

Daveysil15 · 16-06-2012 6:22pm

dub5 wrote: »

Ok, I am done. 20 males have been mailed. Apologies to anyone on here that didnt make the cut but if I dont get any replies from the 20, I might consider you guys

Devastated I didnt get a mail from a mail from Davey

A girl replied to me saying she was dub5. I assumed it was you.

How many photos do you have up?

dub5 · 16-06-2012 6:29pm

Daveysil15 wrote: »

dub5 wrote: »

Ok, I am done. 20 males have been mailed. Apologies to anyone on here that didnt make the cut but if I dont get any replies from the 20, I might consider you guys

Devastated I didnt get a mail from a mail from Davey

A girl replied to me saying she was dub5. I assumed it was you. How many photos do you have up?

About 4 I think. I haven't got any mail today

Galvasean · 16-06-2012 6:42pm

Daveysil15 wrote: »

A girl replied to me saying she was dub5. I assumed it was you.

Now that is perplexing. Perhaps it was a fellow boardsie who has been watching this thread and fancies some mischief?

dub5 · 16-06-2012 6:44pm

Galvasean wrote: »

Daveysil15 wrote: »

A girl replied to me saying she was dub5. I assumed it was you.

Now that is perplexing. Perhaps it was a fellow boardsie who has been watching this thread and fancies some mischief?

Interesting alright.

Varied · 16-06-2012 7:02pm

Larianne wrote: »

You'll be grand. Remember she will probably be just as nervous!!! Just have a few conversation starters in your head ready. Have fun!

If by conversation starters you mean drinks then I'm getting there :P

dub5 · 16-06-2012 7:22pm

Varied wrote: »

If by conversation starters you mean drinks then I'm getting there :P

NO NO NO....dont get pissed:eek:

Varied · 16-06-2012 7:36pm

dub5 wrote: »

NO NO NO....dont get pissed:eek:

Nah I'm not that stupid. Just one or two to calm the nerves.

the west wing · 16-06-2012 9:21pm

Ok some I've been lurking on this thread for a while and have been on OKC for about a month. Have had a couple of dates and they have gone well. My issue now is this one guy that has been contacting me all along.

He is really nice and I think he is cute. At first we were talking alot and it was really interesting. However now most of his messages are one sentence long with very little content. Normally I would think that he wasn't interested in me, but he always initiates conversation, always! Most days there will be a mail waiting for me but very quickly the conversation ends up with me trying to write at least a paragraph to every reply and him writing back a sentence, or sometimes just a word!! I'm just finding it very frustrating. He lives in a different part of the country so we just can't meet up for a coffee.

I know he is capable of talking as he did at the start, but now he seems to have gotten lazy. But I don't understand why he keeps talking to me if he has nothing to say??

dub5 · 16-06-2012 9:34pm

the west wing wrote: »

Ok some I've been lurking on this thread for a while and have been on OKC for about a month. Have had a couple of dates and they have gone well. My issue now is this one guy that has been contacting me all along.

He is really nice and I think he is cute. At first we were talking alot and it was really interesting. However now most of his messages are one sentence long with very little content. Normally I would think that he wasn't interested in me, but he always initiates conversation, always! Most days there will be a mail waiting for me but very quickly the conversation ends up with me trying to write at least a paragraph to every reply and him writing back a sentence, or sometimes just a word!! I'm just finding it very frustrating. He lives in a different part of the country so we just can't meet up for a coffee.

I know he is capable of talking as he did at the start, but now he seems to have gotten lazy. But I don't understand why he keeps talking to me if he has nothing to say??

In my opinion I would reckon he had lost interest. Its the usual story.....all keen at the start, daily long messages and then after roughly 6 weeks (for me anyway), the messages get a bit dull and short etc. Basically I think that alot of men are scared to actually say that they are not interested anymore, which is silly really, as women would prefer the honesty.

The way I look at it is, if you are questioning his motives at this stage and you havent even met him, just move on dont waste your time on him. Whats the point, life is too short.

MarkyTheLips · 16-06-2012 9:36pm

the west wing wrote: »

Ok some I've been lurking on this thread for a while and have been on OKC for about a month. Have had a couple of dates and they have gone well. My issue now is this one guy that has been contacting me all along.

He is really nice and I think he is cute. At first we were talking alot and it was really interesting. However now most of his messages are one sentence long with very little content. Normally I would think that he wasn't interested in me, but he always initiates conversation, always! Most days there will be a mail waiting for me but very quickly the conversation ends up with me trying to write at least a paragraph to every reply and him writing back a sentence, or sometimes just a word!! I'm just finding it very frustrating. He lives in a different part of the country so we just can't meet up for a coffee.

I know he is capable of talking as he did at the start, but now he seems to have gotten lazy. But I don't understand why he keeps talking to me if he has nothing to say??

Sounds like he could have quite a few plates spinning...

the west wing · 16-06-2012 9:41pm

Yeah I think you guys are right. Thanks for the replies!

Larianne · 16-06-2012 9:54pm

the west wing wrote: »

Yeah I think you guys are right. Thanks for the replies!

How come you haven't met up?

the west wing · 16-06-2012 9:58pm

Well I was out of the country for over a week and he lives on the opposite side of the country and works 6 nights a week. He has never suggested to meet up unlike other guys. So I dunno? I've had other guys really interested in me so I think I'm just going to tell him I'm not interested.

MarkyTheLips · 16-06-2012 10:03pm

the west wing wrote: »

Yeah I think you guys are right. Thanks for the replies!

Welcome

sad part is he's probably chuffed with himself as quite the ladies man :pac: .. I'd a date organised last sat and she postponed til the following night.. i dropped a text to organise a time and heard nothing back until later that night.. "Sorry didn't see your text 'til now figured you didn't want to meet up!" then nothing 'til a text today asking what I'm up to tonight
My @rse is roasting on this back-burner..:rolleyes:

dub5 · 16-06-2012 10:07pm

MarkyTheLips wrote: »

Welcome sad part is he's probably chuffed with himself as quite the ladies man :pac: .. I'd a date organised last sat and she postponed til the following night.. i dropped a text to organise a time and heard nothing back until later that night.. "Sorry didn't see your text 'til now figured you didn't want to meet up!" then nothing 'til a text today asking what I'm up to tonight
My @rse is roasting on this back-burner..:rolleyes:

I honestly think that people, both men and women, just use the on line dating out of boredom. Saying that, that is why I probably joined POF, as I was bored in the evening and it was fun chatting to people. But at the same time, I am single and I would like to met someone, so I am not a time waster. I just wish people would be honest with each other. I would rather someone to me "listen I am not interested, you are not my type etc", rather than this crap of ignoring each other. Really annoys me

coco_lola · 16-06-2012 10:08pm

dub5, I got a message today asking "Are you dub5?"

Methinks you are popular

dub5 · 16-06-2012 10:15pm

coco_lola wrote: »

dub5, I got a message today asking "Are you dub5?"

Methinks you are popular

Send them my way PLEASE

MarkyTheLips · 16-06-2012 10:19pm

dub5 wrote: »

I honestly think that people, both men and women, just use the on line dating out of boredom. Saying that, that is why I probably joined POF, as I was bored in the evening and it was fun chatting to people. But at the same time, I am single and I would like to met someone, so I am not a time waster. I just wish people would be honest with each other. I would rather someone to me "listen I am not interested, you are not my type etc", rather than this crap of ignoring each other. Really annoys me

Chronic attention seekers will surface everywhere as well so they need to be waded through

"validate meeee!!!! Kthxbai"..

16-06-2012 10:41pm

At what point is it okay to suggest meeting up? Is there a specific timeframe?

Larianne · 16-06-2012 10:46pm

Karsini wrote: »

At what point is it okay to suggest meeting up? Is there a specific timeframe?

Really depends on how long you've been messaging the person - as in, are you spending an hour online messaging back and forth for a few days or sending just one message everyday.

If there is a lot of messages flying to and fro, I'd say around day 4-5 suggest meeting up. If its more single messages every day I would say 7-14 days.

Then again, it just really depends on how the conversation is going.

Have any of ye seen people you have been chatting to online/seen online about the place? I've seen two guys in the past week, in the same area! :eek: And I'm almost sure one dude served me in HMV last week. ha!

dub5 · 16-06-2012 10:46pm

Karsini wrote: »

At what point is it okay to suggest meeting up? Is there a specific timeframe?

I suppose it depends on when you feel comfortable with meeting the person. I would never meet someone after a day of chatting. You should get a vibe from a person, that they are normal enough, and hopefully not a serial killer, after a while.

The first guy I met from on line, I was chatting to him for about a month prior before meeting. When I met him, there was no spark, although we got on well, and then after that, I decided not to wait that long to met someone, as I felt that I had wasted a month.

Normally I would wait a week at least.

MarkyTheLips · 16-06-2012 10:54pm

Karsini wrote: »

At what point is it okay to suggest meeting up? Is there a specific timeframe?

It's more down to the dynamic you have with the person in my experience. Usually after a couple of phone calls to find common ground/weaken the conversational ice before breaking it in person

An advantage like already having a private joke with a person you've never met is gold in those situations. You'll feel when it's right but it isn't going to take ages, not if both parties have an interest.. Don't let things get stagnant or you'll end up messaging each other about the weather and wondering why she isn't enjoying the sun with you

I went on a date the day I signed up to POF (really!) so there just isn't a hard and fast rule for me.

MarkyTheLips · 16-06-2012 10:58pm

Larianne wrote: »

Really depends on how long you've been messaging the person - as in, are you spending an hour online messaging back and forth for a few days or sending just one message everyday.

If there is a lot of messages flying to and fro, I'd say around day 4-5 suggest meeting up. If its more single messages every day I would say 7-14 days.

Then again, it just really depends on how the conversation is going.

Have any of ye seen people you have been chatting to online/seen online about the place? I've seen two guys in the past week, in the same area! :eek: And I'm almost sure one dude served me in HMV last week. ha!

A girl I went on a few dates with years ago turned up at my mates wedding as the receptionist at the hotel if that counts? That was a strange check-in experience.

16-06-2012 11:06pm

Thanks. While I don't really have my eye on anyone in particular at the moment I'm still getting the hang of what to do and what not.

The only woman I've been in touch with fairly regularly has in her profile that she's seeing someone. She contacted me first though.

Larianne · 16-06-2012 11:10pm

MarkyTheLips wrote: »

A girl I went on a few dates with years ago turned up at my mates wedding as the receptionist at the hotel if that counts? That was a strange check-in experience.

I'm waiting to go to a beers or a restaurant or interview and meet someone I was chatting with. :pac: Ireland is very small.

Karsini - is that on OKcupid? Is she seeing someone? Does that not bother you?

dub5 · 16-06-2012 11:11pm

Karsini wrote: »

Thanks. While I don't really have my eye on anyone in particular at the moment I'm still getting the hang of what to do and what not.

The only woman I've been in touch with fairly regularly has in her profile that she's seeing someone. She contacted me first though.

WHAT......She is seeing someone....so what is she on POF for?

16-06-2012 11:13pm

Larianne wrote: »

I'm waiting to go to a beers or a restaurant or interview and meet someone I was chatting with. :pac: Ireland is very small.

Karsini - is that on OKcupid? Is she seeing someone? Does that not bother you?

Yeah she's on OKCupid alright. I'm not taking it seriously at all, hence why I said I don't have my eyes on anyone in particular. I don't know if she is seeing anyone, never asked, but her profile says so.

MarkyTheLips · 16-06-2012 11:15pm

Karsini wrote: »

Thanks. While I don't really have my eye on anyone in particular at the moment I'm still getting the hang of what to do and what not.

The only woman I've been in touch with fairly regularly has in her profile that she's seeing someone. She contacted me first though.

http://www.google.ie/url?sa=t&rct=j&q=office%20gareth%20sidecar&source=web&cd=3&ved=0CF4QtwIwAg&url=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.youtube.com%2Fwatch%3Fv%3D-1i7LQGdZyY&ei=egTdT-jbCIOWhQeCrc2hCg&usg=AFQjCNG7xZN9uIHbQA6TVaRZnXkfixS7eA

It's late and I've never embedded so excuse the link

but that could be in your near future if you aren't careful

16-06-2012 11:24pm

Hmm, looking back, anyone (except for one) who messaged me on OKCupid has themselves down as "Seeing someone" and "Looking for friends." Anyone I've messaged hasn't replied to me.

I don't know about this...

mood · 16-06-2012 11:46pm

catallus wrote: »

I think what he means is the ratio of men to women on the sites is so skewed that it's hard to get a man's profile to be noticed due to the sheer numbers of guys on the sites compared to women....Literally thousands of guys to a few hundred women....

Where is the evidence of that?

Varied · 17-06-2012 12:28am

LOL what a disaster. She was an absolute nut. Never again will I do this.

Samich · 17-06-2012 12:30am

Varied wrote: »

LOL what a disaster. She was an absolute nut. Never again will I do this.

Details?

The Online Dating Thread 3..**READ 1ST POST Oct 2012**

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The Online Dating Thread 3..READ 1ST POST Oct 2012