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positive beginnings

24

Comments

  • #52
    hubba
    Registered Users Posts: 376 ✭✭hubba


    souls wrote: »
    There are times when i have fleeting thoughts of just having a glass of wine and proving to myself i can just leave it at that. I let thoughts like these occur.. I find they go as quick as they come. I've definitely learned a certain amount of mindfulness in the last few months..

    Still when the 'victim' persona raises its ugly head and i get thoughts like "ah ,no one gives a **** about the effort I've put in" , "I've no friends now so **** it" "life is still ****ing hard" it can be quite taxing on the system. i find my routine of excerise and meditation has helped significantly.. its no surprise that creating a new life for myself as apposed to the life of feeling deprived has worked no end for me.

    still i would love to hear advice and thoughts from anybody who has found other outlets or whatever to aid them when days seem dark..

    Hi Souls, what I tell myself if I'm feeling weak, is that going back to drinking would just make things worse. In NO way would it possibly improve matters. My problems would still be there, AND I would have added drinking on to it again. Works for me, every time.


  • #53
    souls
    Registered Users Posts: 131 ✭✭souls


    117 days!i think haha i better double check that!losing count.
    anyway i was having a scan through my old posts and feel so proud of myself for how far I've come!
    to think of the grip that booze had around me for so long,actually almost makes me well up with tears..
    its a ****ing curse. and to see the untold damage alcohol does to our society as a whole sometimes leaves me feeling overwhelmed.its important for me to remember that.


  • #54
    KeefF
    Registered Users Posts: 174 ✭✭KeefF


    souls wrote: »
    117 days!i think haha i better double check that!losing count.
    anyway i was having a scan through my old posts and feel so proud of myself for how far I've come!
    to think of the grip that booze had around me for so long,actually almost makes me well up with tears..
    its a ****ing curse. and to see the untold damage alcohol does to our society as a whole sometimes leaves me feeling overwhelmed.its important for me to remember that.
    Very well done.


  • #55
    souls
    Registered Users Posts: 131 ✭✭souls


    It's with a heavy heart that i have to write this post, i feel such shame and anger at myself for blowing my abstinence last night. after all my hard work i have let myself down. But today is a new day. i will start again and learn from my mistakes.


  • #56
    Sunnyisland
    Closed Accounts Posts: 10,562 ✭✭✭✭Sunnyisland


    souls wrote: »
    It's with a heavy heart that i have to write this post, i feel such shame and anger at myself for blowing my abstinence last night. after all my hard work i have let myself down. But today is a new day. i will start again and learn from my mistakes.

    No need to be embarrassed souls,I wouldn't say it was BIG TIME though. You made a mistake, you choose to drink. This is not the end. It's a stumbling block along the path. Pick yourself up and keep walking towards sobriety. You can do this, you've proven that you can. Nobody here is perfect, we understand that. We all make mistakes.

    This happened. Knowledge cannot be taken away from you. You have learned so much and now you have learned something else today. No time has been wasted. This is a journey and you have taken one small step backwards but look at all the forward steps you Have taken,You are so much further along the path then when you started. Please continue this journey,it's so worth it :-)


  • #57
    souls
    Registered Users Posts: 131 ✭✭souls


    Thank you for your words Realies,Theres not a chance i'm not giving up! I have been in pubs recently as my childhood friend was emigrating so its evident that i shouldn't have done that,complacency on my part! i don't mind admitting i cried earlier as my sobriety means everything to me!


  • #58
    souls
    Registered Users Posts: 131 ✭✭souls


    Hey guys i hope everybody is doing well!? I thought id add a little post as I remember when I was initially making changes to my lifestyle i would be glued to this forum looking for information,advice and support!And would often follow individuals on their journeys!

    Today I'm feeling great and have being enjoying a new healthy life, I keep everything in the here and now and don't get as anxious as i used to. Ive learned a lot this year about myself and indeed others, Ive learned (probably for the first time in my life) that it's OK to make mistakes! These mistakes are what help us learn,adapt and grow as human beings!

    I keep active with daily running/meditation and pursue my interests in music.

    There is one thing that for me though id like to seek opinions on and that is my job which i enjoy and have been at for many years but its right in the nest/business of our old friend Alcohol! Now for me its never been an issue as it's my job! But i wonder if the old saying "hang around a barbers long enough…and your gonna get a haircut" comes in to play?

    I know at the end of the day only I can answer that…so maybe by writing it down like that i can see what i should do?but there are other elements such as family and my daughter that come into play here… so just feeling a little confused at the moment.

    anyway as I said I hope everybody is well! Stay the course amigos! :D


  • #59
    souls
    Registered Users Posts: 131 ✭✭souls


    Well thats a wedding done sober for the first time ever!haha twas grand.


  • #60
    DAWID123
    Registered Users Posts: 1 ✭DAWID123


    Hello my name Andrew,I came to Ireland in 2006,In 2006 I LIVE IN NEWBRIDGE.For 6 months I went there for aa meetings in Newbridge.It is not true that in aa around the world are the same rights meetings AA ..Am from Poland i live now in Dublin.I went yesterday to Newbridge ,where I lived in 2006.I found yesterday ,my frend from AA Irish meeting died a few weeks earlier In the house where I lived, people drank alcohol and did fracas.THIS WAS MY WORST PERIOD IN LIFE.I ASKED FOR HELP PEOPLE With AA,WHEN I LOOKING FOR JOB.NOBODY DID NOT HELPED.PEOPLE FROM AA NEWBRIDGE WAS DEAF AND BLIND!!!.PEOPLE FROM AA NEWBRIDGE IGNORED ME AND MY FRIEND FROM POLAND.LUDZIE Z AA NEWBRIDGE WAS VERY IMPORTANT .TODAY WE KNOW THAT THERE UNWELCOME FOREIGNERS IN MEETINGS AA NEWBRIDGE.After 8 years when I LIVE IN iRELAND I WANT COME BACK TO MY COUNTRY.12 STEPS PROGRAM IS ONLY ON MEETINGS AA .AFTER MEETING I DONT SEE FRIEND FROM AA.PEOPLE FROM AA ARE LIARS.AM SOBER FOR 12 YEARS .THANK YOU IRELAND!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


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  • #61
    tealcottage
    Registered Users Posts: 32 ✭tealcottage


    souls wrote: »
    Well thats a wedding done sober for the first time ever!haha twas grand.

    Well done!

    Isn't it a brilliant feeling to come home from a wedding sober.


  • #62
    userod
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 327 ✭✭userod


    DAWID123 wrote: »
    Hello my name Andrew,I came to Ireland in 2006,In 2006 I LIVE IN NEWBRIDGE.For 6 months I went there for aa meetings in Newbridge.It is not true that in aa around the world are the same rights meetings AA ..Am from Poland i live now in Dublin.I went yesterday to Newbridge ,where I lived in 2006.I found yesterday ,my frend from AA Irish meeting died a few weeks earlier In the house where I lived, people drank alcohol and did fracas.THIS WAS MY WORST PERIOD IN LIFE.I ASKED FOR HELP PEOPLE With AA,WHEN I LOOKING FOR JOB.NOBODY DID NOT HELPED.PEOPLE FROM AA NEWBRIDGE WAS DEAF AND BLIND!!!.PEOPLE FROM AA NEWBRIDGE IGNORED ME AND MY FRIEND FROM POLAND.LUDZIE Z AA NEWBRIDGE WAS VERY IMPORTANT .TODAY WE KNOW THAT THERE UNWELCOME FOREIGNERS IN MEETINGS AA NEWBRIDGE.After 8 years when I LIVE IN iRELAND I WANT COME BACK TO MY COUNTRY.12 STEPS PROGRAM IS ONLY ON MEETINGS AA .AFTER MEETING I DONT SEE FRIEND FROM AA.PEOPLE FROM AA ARE LIARS.AM SOBER FOR 12 YEARS .THANK YOU IRELAND!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    Maybe you found the meetings tough because you can't string together a sensible English sentence. Maybe you mistaked 'feeling unwelcome' with just the fact that other people probably hadn't a clue what you were on about.


  • #63
    KeefF
    Registered Users Posts: 174 ✭✭KeefF


    userod wrote: »
    Maybe you found the meetings tough because you can't string together a sensible English sentence. Maybe you mistaked 'feeling unwelcome' with just the fact that other people probably hadn't a clue what you were on about.

    I understand where the OP is coming from. I attended AA for over a year and was really surprised with the lack of interaction and explicit support. I have to admit that it took me a long time to open up at meetings and while this did help, I never found people very welcoming. I attended a meeting in the City Centre and I found aspects very clique (y). It obviously works well for a lot of people and certain people find it easy to integrate but that has not been my experience. As I said aspects of that experience are my responsibility but not everyone has the same experience and I personally would be reluctant to diminish anyone's experience due to their ability to "string together a sensible English sentence"


  • #64
    xzanti
    Moderators, Entertainment Moderators Posts: 10,439 Mod ✭✭✭✭xzanti


    userod wrote: »
    Maybe you found the meetings tough because you can't string together a sensible English sentence. Maybe you mistaked 'feeling unwelcome' with just the fact that other people probably hadn't a clue what you were on about.

    Irony ;)

    Also, bit harsh there, no? I understood the point he was making.. compassion is a universal language.. he shouldn't have been left feeling unwelcome at his meetings imo.


  • #65
    [Deleted User]
    Posts: 0 ✭ [Deleted User]


    xzanti wrote: »
    Irony ;)

    Also, bit harsh there, no? I understood the point he was making.. compassion is a universal language.. he shouldn't have been left feeling unwelcome at his meetings imo.

    This is true. I am Irish but if I was in Poland and not from there and had an abuse problem I would like to think that if my Polish wasn't the best I wouldn't be ignored just cause I couldn't speak the language the best. Being honest I know everyone has their own methods of quitting but I do think that there is better methods than A.A.


  • #66
    souls
    Registered Users Posts: 131 ✭✭souls


    Stay the path. meditation is medication. Daily Exercise and eat healthily. :)


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  • #67
    lufties
    Registered Users Posts: 3,507 ✭✭✭lufties


    hubba wrote: »
    I don't think we can expect others to understand. And maybe understand is the wrong word. I know when I was a drinker, my mind was closed shut to the idea of life without alcohol. Shut firmly and that meant that all non drinkers were a species to be wary of and on occasion, to ridicule. These feelings of mine (and I know other drinkers are like this) were based on denial and fear. I can see that clearly now but I do remember how closed my mind was and how I avoided non drinkers like the plague.

    And yes, I have been hurt by comments from those who I thought were friends about me being 'boring' and when was I going to stop this and start drinking again. Hurt that they weren't bothering to try to understand what a huge deal it was to me but then again, they were pub friends. Family have also been guilty of looking at me, bemused, wondering why I don't drink but not daring to ask. At this stage I just have to tell myself that this is my journey and I have to travel it alone. I am doing it for myself so can't expect anyone to tell me how well I'm doing (except all of you here, who keep me sane). I am the only one who lives inside my head and that is where it matters at the end of the day.

    It may help to turn it around and feel compassion for drinkers as they are still in the dark whereas we have discovered a secret. The secret to REAL life. This sounds lofty, and any drinkers reading this - cue your scathing laugh - but there's no other way of putting it.. I feel like my life before sobriety was all somehow fake. So maybe try to be 'understanding' of your drinking friends, without being patronising and just try to accept them for who they are, just like you would like them to accept you. :)

    I went to a fresh start clinic last week and was amazed to hear that alcohol damage can be accumulative, I always thought if you drink then detox via exercise, sauna etc that you'll be grand. The doc suggested going on a detox (I'm a moderate drinker), not sure if I could give it up fully though. I had 5 pints last night and felt awful today, it was spent mostly in bed.


  • #68
    Arbing dog
    Registered Users Posts: 8 ✭Arbing dog


    Hi all. I've been browsing boards all morning reading up in these topics and overall I found this one great. For the last 5 years I have struggled with alcohol abuse, I went from a sports mad nice guy to a nuisance that had lost the respect of many people. Only a few days ago I hit rock bottom after a binge of drinking and drugs. I tried to take my own life and luckily I failed. I had drove everyone who cared about me away but thankfully when I needed my family they were there for me. I know I'm along way off being cured, but I was hoping if anyone here could offer any advice it would be most appreciated. Here's to a clean living 2015 where hopefully I can build back up the bridges I've burned down over the last few years.


  • #69
    souls
    Registered Users Posts: 131 ✭✭souls


    Arbing dog wrote: »
    Hi all. I've been browsing boards all morning reading up in these topics and overall I found this one great. For the last 5 years I have struggled with alcohol abuse, I went from a sports mad nice guy to a nuisance that had lost the respect of many people. Only a few days ago I hit rock bottom after a binge of drinking and drugs. I tried to take my own life and luckily I failed. I had drove everyone who cared about me away but thankfully when I needed my family they were there for me. I know I'm along way off being cured, but I was hoping if anyone here could offer any advice it would be most appreciated. Here's to a clean living 2015 where hopefully I can build back up the bridges I've burned down over the last few years.[/QUOTE

    Well Thankfully you didn't your own life Arbing dog! As they say … "A permanent solution to a temporary problem" .. is not the answer! The human being has a inert instinct to survive. You have proved this.

    Sorry I've only seen this now, but there are always people out there that care, Im delighted to hear your family are there for you! that should be of great comfort to you!

    My Advice to you,is to start small, you have already made the first step by posting on here!and that alone is a great achievement.!:)
    It is just through little steps that you will make that "big" change!

    I recommend exercise,meditation,healthy eating as but a few guidelines but please dont hesitate to pm me if u want to talk more!

    happy christmas to you and yours! :)


  • #70
    gmarty
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 87 ✭✭gmarty


    I came to AA 13 years ago in limerick I struggled to get in with the crowd for years and did find it cliquey and I was a person terrified of meeting new faces. Yet after many failed attempts and not knowing anyone from limerick it finally dawned on me, it was up to me to get up off my backside and make my presence known. I came half hour before the meeting and hung around a hour afterwards, people began to take notice and I haven't looked back since. I realised it's up to me and no one else to make my recovery work, and Iv applied the same routine to many other rooms and it works. One can make all the excuses and play the blame game all they want of why AA didn't work for them, if u want to sort ur ****e out one must find that desire within themselves and go to any lengths to get a decent quality of life.! God Bless AA and the people of limerick for giveing me a life worth living today.


  • #71
    souls
    Registered Users Posts: 131 ✭✭souls


    Im glad what works for you gmarty, works for you. :)

    Stay the course.


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  • #72
    [Deleted User]
    Posts: 0 ✭ [Deleted User]


    There's a good article by Pádraig O'Morain in today's Irish Times encouraging people to give up alcohol for the new year: That’s men: Keep yourself active, eat regularly and you can give up the drink (can't link here). There's a lot of wisdom such as the role of boredom and being conscious of the association between hunger and alcohol.

    He also recommends a book by by somebody named Jason Vale, entitled Kick the drink . . . Easily!. It has got some excellent reviews over on Amazon. Anybody find it useful?


  • #73
    Arbing dog
    Registered Users Posts: 8 ✭Arbing dog


    souls wrote: »
    Arbing dog wrote: »
    Hi all. I've been browsing boards all morning reading up in these topics and overall I found this one great. For the last 5 years I have struggled with alcohol abuse, I went from a sports mad nice guy to a nuisance that had lost the respect of many people. Only a few days ago I hit rock bottom after a binge of drinking and drugs. I tried to take my own life and luckily I failed. I had drove everyone who cared about me away but thankfully when I needed my family they were there for me. I know I'm along way off being cured, but I was hoping if anyone here could offer any advice it would be most appreciated. Here's to a clean living 2015 where hopefully I can build back up the bridges I've burned down over the last few years.[/QUOTE

    Well Thankfully you didn't your own life Arbing dog! As they say … "A permanent solution to a temporary problem" .. is not the answer! The human being has a inert instinct to survive. You have proved this.

    Sorry I've only seen this now, but there are always people out there that care, Im delighted to hear your family are there for you! that should be of great comfort to you!

    My Advice to you,is to start small, you have already made the first step by posting on here!and that alone is a great achievement.!:)
    It is just through little steps that you will make that "big" change!

    I recommend exercise,meditation,healthy eating as but a few guidelines but please dont hesitate to pm me if u want to talk more!

    happy christmas to you and yours! :)

    Thanks for your reply souls, it means a lot. I haven't touched a drop yet and I must say I've had my best Christmas in years. Looking forward to getting fit and eating right in the new year. I know it's a cliche to say that at this time of year but what the hell :). I'm also looking forward to getting back into some of my old passions and past times. Here's to onwards and upwards. Thanks again


  • #74
    the evasion_kid
    Closed Accounts Posts: 2,740 ✭✭✭the evasion_kid


    [Deleted User] wrote: »
    There's a good article by Pádraig O'Morain in today's Irish Times encouraging people to give up alcohol for the new year: That’s men: Keep yourself active, eat regularly and you can give up the drink (can't link here). There's a lot of wisdom such as the role of boredom and being conscious of the association between hunger and alcohol.

    He also recommends a book by by somebody named Jason Vale, entitled Kick the drink . . . Easily!. It has got some excellent reviews over on Amazon. Anybody find it useful?

    Did that guy start a thread on here a while ago offering to send his book to people?


  • #75
    souls
    Registered Users Posts: 131 ✭✭souls


    So if i stay sober do i stay single!?? …… (actual genuine question)

    Im back on the saddle and feeling much better for it, but i have noticed that when the booze goes so do the ladies :(


  • #76
    Arbing dog
    Registered Users Posts: 8 ✭Arbing dog


    souls wrote: »
    So if i stay sober do i stay single!?? …… (actual genuine question)

    Im back on the saddle and feeling much better for it, but i have noticed that when the booze goes so do the ladies :(

    I don't think that's the case souls. It might just seen like that for a while. Stick at it and everything will fall into place lad. I find im better at talking to women sober once I pluck up the courage.


  • #77
    souls
    Registered Users Posts: 131 ✭✭souls


    Mind racing ahead of itself as usual, feel like **** as usual, wish i could fast forward a few weeks. feel god awful. I know this is normal though.. bleugh.


  • #78
    [Deleted User]
    Posts: 0 ✭ [Deleted User]


    souls wrote: »
    So if i stay sober do i stay single!?? …… (actual genuine question)

    Im back on the saddle and feeling much better for it, but i have noticed that when the booze goes so do the ladies :(

    I suspect staying single might be best for you until you conquer the drink, or at least feel safer from it. Try and keep your life as simple and uncomplicated as possible until you feel stronger. Sorting out you should be your priority until then. There are a lot of blessings in being single when tackling addiction; you have the freedom to do so many spiritual, life-changing things and adventures which might not be possible in a serious relationship. Walk the Camino de Santiago? Nepal? Spend time in a monastery of your choice? The possibilities are endless. Make the most of the freedom of your single days.


  • #79
    souls
    Registered Users Posts: 131 ✭✭souls


    Deleted User wrote: »
    I suspect staying single might be best for you until you conquer the drink, or at least feel safer from it. Try and keep your life as simple and uncomplicated as possible until you feel stronger. Sorting out you should be your priority until then. There are a lot of blessings in being single when tackling addiction; you have the freedom to do so many spiritual, life-changing things and adventures which might not be possible in a serious relationship. Walk the Camino de Santiago? Nepal? Spend time in a monastery of your choice? The possibilities are endless. Make the most of the freedom of your single days.

    Solid advice! Thanks Anamcheasta :)


  • #80
    souls
    Registered Users Posts: 131 ✭✭souls


    I forgot how much like an Anti-Christ one becomes when stopping drinking. A place to go for the first 30 days,out away from society would be a dream come true for me,but i dont have that luxury.. so its into ****ing work where I'm surrounded by ****ing alcohol for 8 ****ing hours!great.


  • #81
    lufties
    Registered Users Posts: 3,507 ✭✭✭lufties


    souls wrote: »
    I forgot how much like an Anti-Christ one becomes when stopping drinking. A place to go for the first 30 days,out away from society would be a dream come true for me,but i dont have that luxury.. so its into ****ing work where I'm surrounded by ****ing alcohol for 8 ****ing hours!great.

    I can really empathise with you souls, you have a lit more will power than me. The longest I've stayed off drink was 11 days in the last 15 years. I've made many attempts, even sought help, but it never works. I do shiftwork too and need something to help me sleep on my rest days.


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  • #82
    souls
    Registered Users Posts: 131 ✭✭souls


    Well today would have been all too easy to grab beers after work and say to hell with it! but sure at least i had an element of mindfulness and indeed experience from before to recognize a trigger a mile off! i was just tired after work and a bit hungry too.
    So at least I'm on my toes now and taking this one day at a time. Im a bit of a moody bollox at the minute too but sure that comes with the territory! id be 3 weeks in had i not had that slip alas I'm only 1 week in now but sure just needed that as a reminder as to why i cannot drink anymore.


  • #83
    Arbing dog
    Registered Users Posts: 8 ✭Arbing dog


    souls wrote: »
    Well today would have been all too easy to grab beers after work and say to hell with it! but sure at least i had an element of mindfulness and indeed experience from before to recognize a trigger a mile off! i was just tired after work and a bit hungry too.
    So at least I'm on my toes now and taking this one day at a time. Im a bit of a moody bollox at the minute too but sure that comes with the territory! id be 3 weeks in had i not had that slip alas I'm only 1 week in now but sure just needed that as a reminder as to why i cannot drink anymore.

    Keep at it souls. I was 5 weeks sober yesterday and while it's been hard just taking a minute to sit down and realise it makes it feel great. I've even had to overcome a family wedding in those few weeks which wasn't easy. At the end of the day it's about playing the long game and getting over each day as it comes. Keep the chin up lad ðŸ‘


  • #84
    souls
    Registered Users Posts: 131 ✭✭souls


    Arbing dog wrote: »
    Keep at it souls. I was 5 weeks sober yesterday and while it's been hard just taking a minute to sit down and realise it makes it feel great. I've even had to overcome a family wedding in those few weeks which wasn't easy. At the end of the day it's about playing the long game and getting over each day as it comes. Keep the chin up lad ðŸ‘


    Well done Arbing dog! you're doing great :)
    Ahh yea the weddings are a pain tbh, i have one to attend next month myself!Fair play to you for getting through it!! ive done them sober in the past myself so i can do it again.

    I was fairly heavy with the drinking there before so the withdrawal at the minute is quite uncomfortable to say the least, Im normally extremely active. i.e running,weights,etc. but I've had to stop for the week as my body is in bits..

    Sure its all about focussing on the here and now. Doing what needs to be done day by day. if i need to rest right now so be it. things will get better. just looking forward to getting decent daylight between me and my last drink so i can take the next step!


  • #85
    souls
    Registered Users Posts: 131 ✭✭souls


    8 days in, sorry if I'm annoying people by posting all the time, just good to vent! particularly at this early stage!
    Drinking copious amounts of coffee,but will be switching back to herbal teas soon, just letting the "come down" off the gargle settle down. Trained yesterday for the first time since stopping, put myself through the paces so feeling a good kind of tired tonight!


  • #86
    [Deleted User]
    Posts: 0 ✭ [Deleted User]


    souls wrote: »
    A place to go for the first 30 days,out away from society would be a dream come true for me,but i dont have that luxury

    You'd be surprised, souls, how you could get away for that time if you make it a priority. I was similarly unable to take time off (primarily for financial reasons) but I needed the "me" time badly. So, I looked at a way to get that month as cheaply as possible and I walked all 800km of the Camino de Santiago very cheaply (between €5 and €10 per night for accommodation).

    In Ireland, I know from my searches at that time, that a number of monasteries still offer people a spiritual space to get away from the world quite cheaply and some will leave it up to you how much you want to donate. Very few people know about this option but I'm sure there are other similarly cost-effective choices (actually this could be a good idea for a thread). To get away you don't need to spend thousands on a retreat, is what I'm saying.

    Failing that, perhaps mindfulness training might help you through this difficult initial period? I find branches of existential philosophy - Heidegger at the moment - helpful to me these days and compatible with the mindfulness idea of appreciating living in the moment and making a point of noticing more about the world around me. I think I might be finally getting, in my own meandering way, to Realies oft-spoken idea in this forum of gratitude for being among the living.


  • #87
    souls
    Registered Users Posts: 131 ✭✭souls


    How long were you sober before you did all that anamcheasta, just out of interest? At the minute I'm keeping it simple as you say, just meeting basic needs. eating well,sleeping and exercise.. But certainly food for thought down the road. I think it's something that i would benefit from greatly..

    Mindfulness is something I'm working on... ill look up that existential philosophy that you suggest :)

    I have some time off in a week or two for a few days so it might be a chance to look up some places in ireland..

    Thanks for the advice :)


  • #88
    [Deleted User]
    Posts: 0 ✭ [Deleted User]


    souls wrote: »
    At the minute I'm keeping it simple as you say, just meeting basic needs. eating well,sleeping and exercise.. But certainly food for thought down the road. I think it's something that i would benefit from greatly..

    Mindfulness is something I'm working on... ill look up that existential philosophy that you suggest :)

    I have some time off in a week or two for a few days so it might be a chance to look up some places in ireland..

    Thanks for the advice :)

    Exercise is fantastic, not least because you'll be tired after it and you won't have time to be thinking of alcohol (see below). Additionally, if you didn't want to just soak in the colour of life and nature and focus on your breathing on your walks/runs, you could download some good self-help resources from free audiobook websites like Librivox and listen to them on your Ipod. At the very least, they'll be a distraction. At best they'll offer you a new, more productive way of thinking about life. Or, at least I find it beneficial in that regard.
    Another thing I find beneficial in helping me to change old modes of thinking is to listen to new types of music. It might be worth exploring music as a way towards solace and growth. I've gone through everything from Andean panpipe to Ludovico Einaudi to Vivaldi to Portishead to Spanish Renaissance music to Dustin O'Halloran. I've discovered music I never would have listened to in languages I would never have considered (Lyric FM on an evening can be very good for introducing me to new classical and world music).
    souls wrote: »
    How long were you sober before you did all that anamcheasta, just out of interest?

    I had been drinking the week before - or at least "normally" - immediately prior to doing the Camino Francés. I decided not to drink on the Camino as I was determined to walk all 800km as a sort of spiritual rebirth from St Jean Pied de Port in southwest France to Santiago de Compostela in Galicia come hell or high water and I knew with the cheap drink I would be lucky to make it to Pamplona (c. 75km from St Jean). Complete ban on drink, then.

    Not drinking actually worked out perfectly because it was so hot I just needed to drink water constantly to dehydrate and obviously alcohol would have made things worse in terms of hydration. But, even more than that, I was so completely knackered every single day (and in pain for the first two weeks with blisters and the like) that all I wanted to do after resting my feet in a basin of water for an hour or so was to fall asleep. With the physical pain, I didn't miss drink at all (I'm sure there's a deeper lesson there about abstinence!). I lost 15kg on it, spent some spiritual time in the 6th century Benedictine monastery in Samos to soak up the famous Gregorian chant and felt light as a feather by the time I walked into Santiago. Although I walked it in summer they say April or September are the best months for walking as it's not too hot then. I think if you try and change your thinking and, as far as possible, your environment, keeping off drink gets easier.


  • #89
    lufties
    Registered Users Posts: 3,507 ✭✭✭lufties


    Im going to see an alcohol clinic counselor tomorrow, hope its a success.


  • #90
    souls
    Registered Users Posts: 131 ✭✭souls


    Deleted User wrote: »
    Exercise is fantastic, not least because you'll be tired after it and you won't have time to be thinking of alcohol (see below). Additionally, if you didn't want to just soak in the colour of life and nature and focus on your breathing on your walks/runs, you could download some good self-help resources from free audiobook websites like Librivox and listen to them on your Ipod. At the very least, they'll be a distraction. At best they'll offer you a new, more productive way of thinking about life. Or, at least I find it beneficial in that regard.
    Another thing I find beneficial in helping me to change old modes of thinking is to listen to new types of music. It might be worth exploring music as a way towards solace and growth. I've gone through everything from Andean panpipe to Ludovico Einaudi to Vivaldi to Portishead to Spanish Renaissance music to Dustin O'Halloran. I've discovered music I never would have listened to in languages I would never have considered (Lyric FM on an evening can be very good for introducing me to new classical and world music).



    I had been drinking the week before - or at least "normally" - immediately prior to doing the Camino Francés. I decided not to drink on the Camino as I was determined to walk all 800km as a sort of spiritual rebirth from St Jean Pied de Port in southwest France to Santiago de Compostela in Galicia come hell or high water and I knew with the cheap drink I would be lucky to make it to Pamplona (c. 75km from St Jean). Complete ban on drink, then.

    Not drinking actually worked out perfectly because it was so hot I just needed to drink water constantly to dehydrate and obviously alcohol would have made things worse in terms of hydration. But, even more than that, I was so completely knackered every single day (and in pain for the first two weeks with blisters and the like) that all I wanted to do after resting my feet in a basin of water for an hour or so was to fall asleep. With the physical pain, I didn't miss drink at all (I'm sure there's a deeper lesson there about abstinence!). I lost 15kg on it, spent some spiritual time in the 6th century Benedictine monastery in Samos to soak up the famous Gregorian chant and felt light as a feather by the time I walked into Santiago. Although I walked it in summer they say April or September are the best months for walking as it's not too hot then. I think if you try and change your thinking and, as far as possible, your environment, keeping off drink gets easier.

    Well i have integrated exercise into my life since last year, i am extremely active and have benefitted greatly from it! however i still fell off the wagon, i was doing weights training in the morning,then going to work,and then 5 to 10 k runs every evening and still finding myself drinking before bed. so it wasn't a full fix for me unfortunately. But then again i didn't want to give up then… i suppose, despite one slip, i have been able to stay off it when i wanted too.

    music helps a lot for sure,i do like classical.. i always play my 'sounds of nature' playlist… Im always listening to rain and storms.. jesus if people knew that they'd think I'm a nut haha,but sure if it helps!why not?

    I think drinking has stripped away a lot of my confidence as well as desire,heart and passion for life.. I'm a shell of a human really just existing as apposed to living and its a ****ing damn shame! A young lad in the prime of his life,unable to leave the house for the most part and too numb to talk or feel.
    If drink was a person id knock the ****ing **** out of him for doing this to me!
    I wonder if anyone has ever got sober through revenge..? a lot of people took advantage of me when i was drinking and this will never sit easy with me..but that was then…i have cut negative agents out of my life..its funny how after i did that the only people i have is my family… anyway i digress .. apologies

    The camino!yes, i have heard only great things! but 800kms!?what?really you walked that distance!?jesus thats some going,fair play. how long did it take you? I can't drink in the heat anyway myself so it probably would be good to do in the summer too!although id need me factor!ha
    Were you with a group or by yourself?just wondering how you managed accommodation etc? did you need a lot of money?
    Ive interests in all things culture.. spirituality maybe not as much however I'm a very open minded person and respect other peoples beliefs. id say it was an amazing experience?


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  • #91
    souls
    Registered Users Posts: 131 ✭✭souls


    lufties wrote: »
    Im going to see an alcohol clinic counselor tomorrow, hope its a success.

    Let us know how you get on lufties! Best of luck :)


  • #92
    souls
    Registered Users Posts: 131 ✭✭souls


    Just wondering if anybody has any information they might think helpful regarding current medication for alcoholism.. I understand that from the small bits of info I've picked up that it should be taken in conjunction with counseling and or 12 step program,etc. But I'm just interested to hear any first hand experience before i talk to my gp.


  • #93
    lufties
    Registered Users Posts: 3,507 ✭✭✭lufties


    souls wrote: »
    Just wondering if anybody has any information they might think helpful regarding current medication for alcoholism.. I understand that from the small bits of info I've picked up that it should be taken in conjunction with counseling and or 12 step program,etc. But I'm just interested to hear any first hand experience before i talk to my gp.

    I was at an alcohol counselor today,she didn't tell me much that I didn't already know but mentioned about the 12 step program and also that AA would be a good option.


  • #94
    souls
    Registered Users Posts: 131 ✭✭souls


    lufties wrote: »
    I was at an alcohol counselor today,she didn't tell me much that I didn't already know but mentioned about the 12 step program and also that AA would be a good option.

    Hey lufties! Yea was wondering how you got on.. So nothing from a medicinal perspective was suggested? was just curious to see whats out there these days..il do some homework myself anyway.

    yep AA and all that is always an option, personally i dont really have any 'spiritual' beliefs as such.. so the idea of having a higher power that will take charge of my addiction doesn't sit with me.. just my opinion on the matter. I am however delighted to see it work for others.


  • #95
    the evasion_kid
    Closed Accounts Posts: 2,740 ✭✭✭the evasion_kid


    souls wrote: »
    Just wondering if anybody has any information they might think helpful regarding current medication for alcoholism.. I understand that from the small bits of info I've picked up that it should be taken in conjunction with counseling and or 12 step program,etc. But I'm just interested to hear any first hand experience before i talk to my gp.

    Usually gp's prescribe Librium or Valium during the initial stages of giving up drinking,more so to keep withdrawals at bay,there's also antabuse which if you drink while taking it is supposed to be a nasty experience,I wouldn't even venture down that road as there have been deaths from it including a youngfella I used to know


  • #96
    lufties
    Registered Users Posts: 3,507 ✭✭✭lufties


    souls wrote: »
    Hey lufties! Yea was wondering how you got on.. So nothing from a medicinal perspective was suggested? was just curious to see whats out there these days..il do some homework myself anyway.

    yep AA and all that is always an option, personally i dont really have any 'spiritual' beliefs as such.. so the idea of having a higher power that will take charge of my addiction doesn't sit with me.. just my opinion on the matter. I am however delighted to see it work for others.

    Oh I didn't realise that AA was about 'God', might give it a miss in that case. My counselor didn't mention medication but I'm sure the anti craving stuff is good.

    For me I'm just taking one day at a time, currently started reading jason vale's book as a help. I read allen carrs' book last year but wasn't ready to knock booze on the head then.


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  • #97
    souls
    Registered Users Posts: 131 ✭✭souls


    lufties wrote: »
    Oh I didn't realise that AA was about 'God', might give it a miss in that case. My counselor didn't mention medication but I'm sure the anti craving stuff is good.

    For me I'm just taking one day at a time, currently started reading jason vale's book as a help. I read allen carrs' book last year but wasn't ready to knock booze on the head then.


    Well their are prayers of a christian nature at it but i know people that go and just use there own version of a 'higher power' at it.. This has absolutely no relevance to me,i tried it a few times for sure as i have an open mind to all avenues and suggest you try it out just to see? i can see some people really get satisfaction from their 'share' maybe you could too? I didn't get any such satisfaction from this so left it, it has 'networking' bonuses if you're into that, i just dont like people. So again each to his own!

    would you believe i have that allen carr book at home and i never read it before moving out! il go home after work tonight and get it!!


  • #98
    Amazingfun
    Registered Users Posts: 3,161 ✭✭✭Amazingfun


    lufties wrote: »
    Oh I didn't realise that AA was about 'God'

    The whole point of AA is to find a power that makes sense to you. If drinking has become your "higher power" (which for many serious problem drinkers it certainly has done)....then it makes perfect sense to now search for a new source of power . For some it's the "power" of the group as a whole...or the beauty of nature...or even concepts like "love" can work. Still others define "GOD" as GOOD ORDERLY DIRECTION etc.
    Truth is no one in AA really cares what you define it as lol ;)

    When you've been beaten almost to death by the bottle having to search for a "something" else as the basis for a new way of life isn't as difficult a move as it may seem.


  • #99
    souls
    Registered Users Posts: 131 ✭✭souls


    Amazingfun wrote: »

    When you've been beaten almost to death by the bottle having to search for a "something" else as the basis for a new way of life isn't as difficult a move as it may seem.

    Whats that old saying 'You have to let someone hit rock bottom before they are willing to accept help' ….


  • #100
    lufties
    Registered Users Posts: 3,507 ✭✭✭lufties


    Had my first night in years out tonight alcohol free and it was speed dating. Normally I'd need a few in me to pluck up some dutch courage but no it was virgin mojito instead :)


  • #101
    Amazingfun
    Registered Users Posts: 3,161 ✭✭✭Amazingfun


    lufties wrote: »
    Had my first night in years out tonight alcohol free and it was speed dating. Normally I'd need a few in me to pluck up some dutch courage but no it was virgin mojito instead :)

    Did you meet anyone you want to see again? :cool:


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