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Morning After House Party

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    #62
    Rowley Birkin QC
    Registered Users Posts: 6,220 ✭✭✭Rowley Birkin QC


    elviscostello wrote: »
    Fire extinguisher in a house?

    Is that the new thing now is it?

    Unfortunately yes. It burns something serious. Almost as bad as toothpaste on the bag.


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    #63
    Degsy
    Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 16,397 ✭✭✭✭Degsy


    This bloke i used to know had a party because his folks had gone away.About ten times what he invited showed up and nobody liked the bloke.His bedroom was taken over to smoke dope and he wasnt allowed in.People would be lured into the darkend back garden till they went into a pond up to thier waist.Everybody emptied the water from thier boots onto the carpet.One guy got chased by somebody with a knife and took refuge in a darkened bedroom.A bloodthirsty scream rent the air...The fool and neglected to say that his bedridden granny was still in the house.The bathroom was an ice rink of vomit,i saw one blonde-haired girl fall on her back with her hair soaked in puke,crying hystericaly.The toilet somehow got smashed and there were wall tiles in the bath(also full of puke).Myself,i went out the back to pee and was sure somebody would lock me out so i out the keys to teh sliding doors in my pocket and propmtly forgot.When his parents got home they had to change all the locks because they couldnt find the keys.The granny hadnt spoken in twenty years suddenly started to speak and couldnt be stopped and i beleive yer man was thrown out of the gaff.


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    #64
    BroomBurner
    Closed Accounts Posts: 2,737 ✭✭✭BroomBurner


    Didn't happen to me, thankfully, but to my boyf before I met him. He was having a drinking session in his house where he lived with a few mates. Fell asleep stocious, as you do, sitting on the couch. Next morning he woke up with this horrible feeling in his jocks. He put his hand down his pants to find a sticky, warm substance. Off he runs to the jacks to discover his mates had stuck a block of cheese just in the part of a man's anatomy between his balls and his arse. I don't want to know how they managed to get it in there...


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    #65
    jayteecork
    Site Banned Posts: 5,676 ✭✭✭jayteecork


    BroomBurner wrote: »
    part of a man's anatomy between his balls and his arse.

    No man's land.


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    #66
    Alter-Ego
    Registered Users Posts: 2,324 ✭✭✭Alter-Ego


    jayteecork wrote: »
    No man's land.
    Guiche.


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    #67
    Rowley Birkin QC
    Registered Users Posts: 6,220 ✭✭✭Rowley Birkin QC


    Barce.


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    #68
    RoosterIllusion
    Closed Accounts Posts: 395 ✭✭RoosterIllusion


    The Gooch


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    #69
    Zzippy
    Moderators, Sports Moderators Posts: 14,166 Mod ✭✭✭✭Zzippy


    Taint


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    #70
    overexcitedaj
    Registered Users Posts: 976 ✭✭✭overexcitedaj


    I woke up one morning to find my flatmate passed out under a Pine tree in the living room. he went on a walk the night before with a knife and came home with that.Its the going on a walk with a knife thing that disturbed me


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    #71
    Degsy
    Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 16,397 ✭✭✭✭Degsy


    Was at a party one time and we all decided we needed to eat something.There was nothing in the house except dog food.We tried to make burgers out of the stuff b ut it disintegrated in the pan.The resulting slop was,with some humour poured out the bedroom window onto a friend of mine urinating out the back.He later shat himself whilst lying in an unconcious heap and had to be stripped and thrown into the bath where he very nearly drowned.


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    #72
    The Walsho
    Registered Users Posts: 1,251 ✭✭✭The Walsho


    Degsy wrote: »
    Was at a party one time and we all decided we needed to eat something.There was nothing in the house except dog food.We tried to make burgers out of the stuff b ut it disintegrated in the pan.The resulting slop was,with some humour poured out the bedroom window onto a friend of mine urinating out the back.He later shat himself whilst lying in an unconcious heap and had to be stripped and thrown into the bath where he very nearly drowned.

    I can just imagine him after you threw the dog food on him, coming back inside to continue drinking, "Well at least this can't get any worse..."


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    #73
    BrokenArrows
    Registered Users Posts: 7,500 ✭✭✭BrokenArrows


    overexcitedaj wrote: »
    I woke up one morning to find my flatmate passed out under a Pine tree in the living room. he went on a walk the night before with a knife and came home with that.Its the going on a walk with a knife thing that disturbed me


    was at least around christmas??

    i post earlier while i was still in bed. got up to find the party last night resulted in someone cracking open a few pens and wiping the ink all over the wooden floor.

    I mean why would anyone do that?


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    #74
    Hanley
    Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 21,981 ✭✭✭✭Hanley


    Degsy wrote: »
    Was at a party one time and we all decided we needed to eat something.There was nothing in the house except dog food.We tried to make burgers out of the stuff b ut it disintegrated in the pan.The resulting slop was,with some humour poured out the bedroom window onto a friend of mine urinating out the back.He later shat himself whilst lying in an unconcious heap and had to be stripped and thrown into the bath where he very nearly drowned.

    Oh dear god how I lol'd!


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    #75
    *adele*
    Registered Users Posts: 1,526 ✭✭✭*adele*


    BrokenArrows wrote: »
    was at least around christmas??

    i post earlier while i was still in bed. got up to find the party last night resulted in someone cracking open a few pens and wiping the ink all over the wooden floor.

    I mean why would anyone do that?
    Thats just lame. Whats wrong with some people


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    #76
    afatbollix
    Registered Users Posts: 4,045 ✭✭✭afatbollix


    Christmasparty wrote: »
    Set up night party at Christmas party in London and have a wonderful occasion with great dinner at reasonable price.
    your a cnut


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    #77
    Call Me Jimmy
    Registered Users Posts: 8,449 ✭✭✭Call Me Jimmy


    I always said morning after house parties are never a good idea because people are always wrecked from the night before.


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    #78
    brendansmith
    Registered Users Posts: 4,526 ✭✭✭brendansmith


    Deleted User wrote: »
    My housemates had a party last night. I somehow manage to sleep through it all as I was so exhausted from a 12 hour shift in work. I go downstairs to put stuff into dishwasher. There's jackets all over the couches (nobody sleeping under them, I checked) and there's golf clubs scattered in the sitting room and kitchen with hedge clippers beside them.

    I've no idea what happened last night.

    What strange things have you discovered the morning after a house party?

    In a previous house we woke up to find orange juice in the fish tank, lumps of meat stuffed into shoes, and the fridge door covered in eggs.

    Wow! *yawn*
    Merry Ploughboy wrote: »
    Havent ever found anything to strange, just furniture and floor covered with sick
    Mossy Monk wrote: »
    I don't have parties at my house. Why bother when other people will have them at their houses instead?

    Haha Cool!
    caoibhin wrote: »
    I found an elderly English hippy in the bath one morning.

    Had a dump anyway.

    Lie!
    Jay P wrote: »
    I know someone who woke up to find out some took a shit in her kettle. And that isn't a euphemism ;)
    and Lie!


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    #79
    anthony4335
    Registered Users Posts: 1,028 ✭✭✭anthony4335


    There are some really disturbed individuals here. But I really did like the boots filled with water left in the freezer, really must try that one some time.


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    #80
    KnifeWRENCH
    Closed Accounts Posts: 11,148 ✭✭✭✭KnifeWRENCH


    togster wrote: »
    A fish tank full of floating cans of cider and no fish :confused:

    Awwwww....:(
    That is possibly the saddest, most pathetic sight ever :(


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    #81
    MCMLXXXIII
    Closed Accounts Posts: 412 ✭✭MCMLXXXIII


    Funny:
    Besides the random, half-naked people sleeping everywhere and a normal mess in my house there were about 250 plastic forks sticking out of my front lawn, and the same amount of paper plates glued all over the outside of my house...some of them past the second floor :eek:

    Funnier:
    A good mate was using his parents house to have a party when they were away. There were a zillion people, but all good friends so no one wrecked anything. A different mate and me rearranged the living room furniture, but it still looked decent and practical. The next morning we cleaned up everything else so his parents wouldn't "find out" and left. My mate even vacuumed the living room and didn't notice.
    His parents came home and his mam immediately noticed the difference, found out everything that happened, and they changed the locks and only let their son come home when he is invited!


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    #82
    Frisbee
    Registered Users Posts: 23,563 ✭✭✭✭Frisbee


    After my mates 21st went back to his house.
    Next morning found that someone had cut all the straps off his sisters shoes... :confused:


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    #83
    IvyTheTerrible
    Closed Accounts Posts: 14,949 ✭✭✭✭IvyTheTerrible


    MCMLXXXIII wrote: »
    Funny:
    Besides the random, half-naked people sleeping everywhere and a normal mess in my house there were about 250 plastic forks sticking out of my front lawn, and the same amount of paper plates glued all over the outside of my house...some of them past the second floor :eek:

    I've heard this story before..


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