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The approach

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  • 30-11-2011 3:55am
    #1
    AstonMartin
    Registered Users Posts: 1,313 ✭✭✭


    Your in a bar with a couple of mates.

    a few seats down you see a gorgeous woman with one or two friends. They look like they are out for the night and having a chat and a drink amongst themselves.

    you catch her eye, you stare at eachother for a couple of seconds and she gives you a little smile.

    how do you approach her, whats your icebreaker?

    shes irish and intelligent with class so you have at most 30 seconds to make an impression!


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    #2
    MrStuffins
    Registered Users Posts: 19,149 ✭✭✭✭MrStuffins


    AstonMartin wrote: »
    shes irish and intelligent with class so you have at most 30 seconds to make an impression!

    Say "Hello again" as from this sentence it sounds like you already know her


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    #3
    Jesus Wept
    Registered Users Posts: 25,243 ✭✭✭✭Jesus Wept


    Get in the van.
    etc.


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    #4
    murraykil
    Closed Accounts Posts: 460 ✭✭murraykil


    AstonMartin wrote: »

    Ahh, Pussy GoLeor! The name's Bond, James Bond, license to thrill! :cool:


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    #5
    dave3004
    Registered Users Posts: 621 ✭✭✭dave3004


    (confidently walk over) "Hello Ladies, you don't mind if a young attractive 26 year old sits down next to you"……Pause for effect……. " Coz my mate is dying to come sit next to yas"……They laugh, you sit and boom…….. Let the night begin !


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    #6
    Dravokivich
    Moderators, Category Moderators, Music Moderators, Politics Moderators, Society & Culture Moderators Posts: 22,360 CMod ✭✭✭✭Dravokivich


    AstonMartin wrote: »
    shes irish and intelligent with class so you have at most 30 seconds to make an impression!

    Well damn my American accent so, I'm shíte at doing Irish. My impression would be terrible.


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    #7
    AstonMartin
    Registered Users Posts: 1,313 ✭✭✭AstonMartin


    Ah lads, surely the collective wisdom of all the well groomed men here can come up with a better plan than trying to rescue a bad opening line by buying drinks for everyone?


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    #8
    Fear Uladh
    Closed Accounts Posts: 810 ✭✭✭Fear Uladh


    "How much for a handjob?"

    Works like a charm.


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    #9
    Scanlas The 2nd
    Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 3,144 ✭✭✭Scanlas The 2nd


    Walk over smile and talk. Any gibberish will do so long as you are relaxed.

    Chat to everyone in the group, perhaps tell them how you imagine they all know each other with mildy silly suggestions.


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    #10
    Standard Toaster
    Registered Users Posts: 10,256 ✭✭✭✭Standard Toaster


    AstonMartin wrote: »
    how do you approach her, whats your icebreaker?

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qurTK_0re3Y


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    #11
    AnonoBoy
    Closed Accounts Posts: 22,559 ✭✭✭✭AnonoBoy


    Do what all good Irish men do and only sleep with friends of friends. That way the introductions are easy and they're obliged to talk to you when you first meet.


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    #12
    Immaculate Pasta
    Registered Users Posts: 1,663 ✭✭✭Immaculate Pasta


    I have issues with the thread title. Do you really call it the approach? You're chatting up a woman not landing a plane!


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    #13
    Guill
    Registered Users Posts: 3,331 ✭✭✭Guill


    Order 9 treble Brandys, Race your mates and see who can drink his three the fastest. The girls seeing how manly you are will be extremely impressed. Winner gets the hottest and so on.

    guarantted to work.


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    #14
    leonidas83
    Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 1,065 ✭✭✭leonidas83


    go over and wip out your cock, hold it in your hand and ask them do they fancy a shot of that. Cheap way to get a few bevvies in


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    #15
    Riddle101
    Registered Users Posts: 8,385 ✭✭✭Riddle101


    Standard Toaster wrote: »
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qurTK_0re3Y

    you know, ricky gervais is notorious from cracking up on set and causing bloopers. So i would imagine he had a hard time doing that scene.

    As for my appoach. I don't know, I guess i'd just walk over to her, preferably when the woman is on her own and introduce myself. Then chat her up.


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    #16
    the groutch
    Closed Accounts Posts: 16,096 ✭✭✭✭the groutch


    let her do the approaching


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    #17
    Snowie
    Closed Accounts Posts: 22,048 ✭✭✭✭Snowie


    AstonMartin wrote: »
    Your in a bar with a couple of mates.

    a few seats down you see a gorgeous woman with one or two friends. They look like they are out for the night and having a chat and a drink amongst themselves.

    you catch her eye, you stare at eachother for a couple of seconds and she gives you a little smile.

    how do you approach her, whats your icebreaker?

    shes irish and intelligent with class so you have at most 30 seconds to make an impression!

    Jizz in your pants ? :confused:


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    #18
    foxyboxer
    Closed Accounts Posts: 3,528 ✭✭✭foxyboxer


    the groutch wrote: »
    let her do the approaching

    Was just about to post that.
    She smiled at you too. Raise your drink and give her a big, friendlty goofy grin and a wink. Then continue on chatting with your buddies.

    She will 'bump' into you later on if she's interested.

    http://floppingaces.net/wp-content/uploads/2011/09/wink-happy-16.jpg


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    #19
    Snowie
    Closed Accounts Posts: 22,048 ✭✭✭✭Snowie


    Ive got it


    Suck me beutifull :pac:


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    #20
    ascanbe
    Registered Users Posts: 3,089 ✭✭✭ascanbe


    http://homepages.theonion.com/PersonalPages/sB/openletter.php


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    #21
    baltimore sun
    Closed Accounts Posts: 483 ✭✭baltimore sun


    AstonMartin wrote: »

    shes irish and intelligent with class

    does not compute, does not compute *head explodes


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    #22
    Dial Square
    Registered Users Posts: 15 ✭Dial Square


    Just go with the Ron Burgundy line and say "I want to be on you!"


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    #23
    mikom
    Closed Accounts Posts: 16,391 ✭✭✭✭mikom


    AstonMartin wrote: »

    shes irish and intelligent with class

    Obviously a post-op transexual.............. avoid.


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    #24
    smash
    Closed Accounts Posts: 34,809 ✭✭✭✭smash


    AstonMartin wrote: »
    how do you approach her, whats your icebreaker?

    Do you know the elephant trick?


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    #25
    yupyup7up
    Closed Accounts Posts: 845 ✭✭✭yupyup7up


    wait till were all p!ssed drunk and stick the head in on the dance floor. 60% of the time it works everytime.


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    #26
    Deus Ex Machina
    Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 1,556 ✭✭✭Deus Ex Machina


    Take another sip of my whiskey and relax.

    I'm not trialing for some football team, I'm out for a drink. I don't want to have to impress anyone.


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    #27
    simonmln
    Registered Users Posts: 205 ✭✭simonmln


    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IShHOub-PO0


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    #28
    MJ23
    Closed Accounts Posts: 3,039 ✭✭✭MJ23


    how's your belly for a lodger ?


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    #29
    starbelgrade
    Closed Accounts Posts: 20,739 ✭✭✭✭starbelgrade


    AstonMartin wrote: »
    Your in a bar with a couple of mates.

    a few seats down you see a gorgeous woman with one or two friends. They look like they are out for the night and having a chat and a drink amongst themselves.

    you catch her eye, you stare at eachother for a couple of seconds and she gives you a little smile.

    how do you approach her, whats your icebreaker?

    shes irish and intelligent with class so you have at most 30 seconds to make an impression!

    You get chatting. You make an impression. You really hit it off.

    At the end of the night, she suggests you go back to hers. You agree.

    Things get steamy in the taxi & you get bet into each other as soon as you're in the door of her house.

    You strip her naked. She's a total ride.

    You're banging her like mad, doggy style, when she turns around & rips off what you now understand to be a prosthetic mask.

    Her real face is revealed.

    It turns out to be your best mate, John.

    So, the only question remains is - do you pull out fast or keep going till you shoot your load?


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    #30
    Dravokivich
    Moderators, Category Moderators, Music Moderators, Politics Moderators, Society & Culture Moderators Posts: 22,360 CMod ✭✭✭✭Dravokivich


    mikom wrote: »
    Obviously a post-op transexual.............. avoid.

    How can you tell it's post op?

    :confused:


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    #31
    PandyAndy
    Registered Users Posts: 583 ✭✭✭PandyAndy


    Approach her with a boner and rub it off her leg.


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