He says / she says

Poloman · 07-10-2008 2:15pm

She Devil wrote: »

thank god he is a real gent and gives it to me.QUOTE]

:pac::)

Tar.Aldarion · 07-10-2008 2:15pm

You were quite patient, women just get stroppy sometimes. Best of luck christy manure!
What would happen if we kept talking during grey's anatomy? Told to stfu!

JaneyMc · 07-10-2008 2:37pm

Tara Le d'Arion wrote: »

You were quite patient, women just get stroppy sometimes. Best of luck christy manure!
What would happen if we kept talking during grey's anatomy? Told to stfu!

Yes, you would. If you don't want the head bitten off ya, don't disturb me while Im watching Grey's Anatomy.

SarahJ · 07-10-2008 2:48pm

JaneyMc wrote: »

Yes, you would. If you don't want the head bitten off ya, don't disturb me while Im watching Grey's Anatomy.

My OH goes home just before this is on, or I leave his house before it starts, just so I have no1 annoying me

shellyboo · 07-10-2008 3:00pm

I totally don't get the whole Grey's Anatomy thing. Does that mean I get my ovaries taken off me?

Anyway, there's a difference between being interrupted during a TV programme that you can't pause or rewind and during a DVD that you can watch anytime. I'm famed for obnoxiously shushing my housemates when my reality-TV-drivel of choice is on.

coco85 · 07-10-2008 3:27pm

I have to say that i think a lot of posters are over-reacting here. The OP and his partner are obviously in a long term committed relationship since they are living together...an argument over him listening to her or not as the case may be should not be a threat to their relationship.(unless there are other issues going on behind the scenes we have not been told about- or unless this is a constant issue between the pair.)

I have a feeling that this same argument happens in hundreds of homes every night of the week!.. after a stressfull day at work i think everyone wants to just take it easy and relax after the day. The OP's way of doing this is to watch a DVD, his girlfriend does this by rambling on about things (like i do).....

Some posters here have the idyllic view that if a man/woman is watching a tv programme/reading book etc etc that they should drop everything for their partners- come on people, unless the house was burning down or there was some serious matter to discuss surely the partner could have waited???...are relationships not all about compromise???- let him watch his programme and you can have your ramble later on...

Now don't get me wrong Christy Manure- you have phrased some aspects of your original post fairly harshly, which doesn't rub well but on the whole i can understand where you are coming from..

I can also understand that your OH might have been excited to tell you about some things that were important to her.. just remember what is trivial matter to you may not be a trivial matter for her...

the_syco · 07-10-2008 3:27pm

shellyboo wrote: »

Anyway, there's a difference between being interrupted during a TV programme that you can't pause or rewind and during a DVD that you can watch anytime. I'm famed for obnoxiously shushing my housemates when my reality-TV-drivel of choice is on.

Anyone else read this as "pause your program to talk to me, but shut up when my programs are on"?

My bets is that she devil is the OH.

gabgab · 07-10-2008 3:42pm

This is funny,

Whilst the OP has described it in that macho I work on wall street and can have my pick kind of way, its a fiar question to ask the ladies:

If you are watching a show you are interested in, and are tired, just looking to chill and I stroll in talking to you about stuff that you have no interest in what would you do?

Be polite, and pause the film/show and listen
Give me that this better be quick look
Encourage a hug in the hope that I will shut up
Break out the mace because there is no reason in hell GabGab should be busting into your living room and talking rubbish to you.....

He made the point in a macho way, but its something that happens

shellyboo · 07-10-2008 3:44pm

the_syco wrote: »

Anyone else read this as "pause your program to talk to me, but shut up when my programs are on"?

My bets is that she devil is the OH.

It should have read as "pause a pauseable programme to talk to anyone, but be quiet when a non-pauseable programme is on". Sorry if I was unclear

St Bill · 07-10-2008 3:57pm

OP, I can't believe how thoughtless your girlfriend was. If I were you, I'd ditch her and start going out with the TV instead.

Careful now....I mean TV as in 'television'

Christy Manure · 07-10-2008 4:02pm

Hmm.

Let me clear up something I maybe should have mentioned earlier. We had already spent the whole day together, visiting her family, where I had made a special effort to be pleasant to everyone. I viewed her attempt to then colonise the remainder of my day as an act of attempted domination. She was not content with me having toed the line all day, but wanted to see me yielding to her completely.

In short, I believe that her desire was not for meaningful communication; it was for obedience.

I have my own theory for why this was. I believe that women are driven by fantasy and jealousy. They see ads and movies where women are with these men who are like insanely devoted butlers, thinking of nothing but satisfying the woman's every whim. They become jealous of the fantasy women who are with the fantasy men, and every so often try to compete with the fantasy women and make their own lives resemble theirs. Then, when this doesn't work, it is someone else's fault.

I thought that coming here, someone would provide me with some kind of alternative explanation for her behaviour, but I have seen none. In fact, you all seem to think the main point is something to do with tv etiquette or whether a girl or a dvd is more important...

Nevyn · 07-10-2008 4:06pm

See her problem clearly is she forgot Barbra Woodhouses advice,
"ChokeChain" or better yet a remote shock collar which will repond to a verbal command so she doesn't have to chip her nail polish pressing a button to get you to conform when you act up.

missmatty · 07-10-2008 4:11pm

Christy Manure wrote: »

Hmm.

Let me clear up something I maybe should have mentioned earlier. We had already spent the whole day together, visiting her family, where I had made a special effort to be pleasant to everyone. I viewed her attempt to then colonise the remainder of my day as an act of attempted domination. She was not content with me having toed the line all day, but wanted to see me yielding to her completely.

In short, I believe that her desire was not for meaningful communication; it was for obedience.

I have my own theory for why this was. I believe that women are driven by fantasy and jealousy. They see ads and movies where women are with these men who are like insanely devoted butlers, thinking of nothing but satisfying the woman's every whim. They become jealous of the fantasy women who are with the fantasy men, and every so often try to compete with the fantasy women and make their own lives resemble theirs. Then, when this doesn't work, it is someone else's fault.

I thought that coming here, someone would provide me with some kind of alternative explanation for her behaviour, but I have seen none. In fact, you all seem to think the main point is something to do with tv etiquette or whether a girl or a dvd is more important...

I think your point of view is understandable. You needed some time in the cave. Of course the ladies here will all get this refernce even if you don't

Dragan · 07-10-2008 4:12pm

Christy Manure wrote: »

Hmm.

Let me clear up something I maybe should have mentioned earlier. We had already spent the whole day together, visiting her family, where I had made a special effort to be pleasant to everyone. I viewed her attempt to then colonise the remainder of my day as an act of attempted domination. She was not content with me having toed the line all day, but wanted to see me yielding to her completely.

In short, I believe that her desire was not for meaningful communication; it was for obedience.

I have my own theory for why this was. I believe that women are driven by fantasy and jealousy. They see ads and movies where women are with these men who are like insanely devoted butlers, thinking of nothing but satisfying the woman's every whim. They become jealous of the fantasy women who are with the fantasy men, and every so often try to compete with the fantasy women and make their own lives resemble theirs. Then, when this doesn't work, it is someone else's fault.

I thought that coming here, someone would provide me with some kind of alternative explanation for her behaviour, but I have seen none. In fact, you all seem to think the main point is something to do with tv etiquette or whether a girl or a dvd is more important...

People could only go off the information you posted. You gave no back story, merely said that you were sitting watching tv and she wanted to talk.

As such i find it amusing that you are holding people's opinions against them when you gave, in essence, **** all information.

My new opinion is, if you are tired from being dragged around all day like a little puppy then get yourself a basket.

Malari · 07-10-2008 4:18pm

Christy Manure wrote: »

Hmm.

Let me clear up something I maybe should have mentioned earlier. We had already spent the whole day together, visiting her family, where I had made a special effort to be pleasant to everyone. I viewed her attempt to then colonise the remainder of my day as an act of attempted domination. She was not content with me having toed the line all day, but wanted to see me yielding to her completely.

In short, I believe that her desire was not for meaningful communication; it was for obedience.

I have my own theory for why this was. I believe that women are driven by fantasy and jealousy. They see ads and movies where women are with these men who are like insanely devoted butlers, thinking of nothing but satisfying the woman's every whim. They become jealous of the fantasy women who are with the fantasy men, and every so often try to compete with the fantasy women and make their own lives resemble theirs. Then, when this doesn't work, it is someone else's fault.

I thought that coming here, someone would provide me with some kind of alternative explanation for her behaviour, but I have seen none. In fact, you all seem to think the main point is something to do with tv etiquette or whether a girl or a dvd is more important...

Perhaps you should have posted this first instead of only talking about the tv then??

Coming into a forum and making sweeping statements about women then hoping that a woman is able to prove you wrong is facile in the extreme. In my experience, I've never met any woman like your above description, in fact most of my friends would agree that a man who conducts himself like a well-behaved puppy is repellant.

kmick · 07-10-2008 4:21pm

There are two things here

1)Most men are unable to focus on two things at a time. When I am driving I have to turn off the radio to be able to hear what my OH is saying. This makes her roll her eyes but I cant help it as when two people are talking simultaneously my instinct is to listen to both which inevitably means I hear neither properly.

2)You might as well have turned off the tv when she came in, looked in her eyes and nodded intently while she described her perfect scarf. It would have been easier in the long run for you and that is all that matters. I think you know this in you own heart.

Gyalist · 07-10-2008 4:43pm

Never truer words spoken...

coco85 · 07-10-2008 4:45pm

Christy Manure wrote: »

Hmm.

I thought that coming here, someone would provide me with some kind of alternative explanation for her behaviour, but I have seen none. In fact, you all seem to think the main point is something to do with tv etiquette or whether a girl or a dvd is more important...

..alternative explaination for her 'behaviour'.. this is you girlfriend you are talking about and not a disobedient child!...

What do you want us to tell you that your girlfriend (dread the thought) wanted to talk to you??!!

Is it a case where you want her to weigh up what she has to say to you.. then decide if it is in fact an inferior matter in relation to your current activity or if it is a superior matter in relation to your current activity.. and then decide if she should talk to you or not.????..

ali.c · 07-10-2008 4:46pm

Christy Manure wrote: »

Hmm.

Let me clear up something I maybe should have mentioned earlier. We had already spent the whole day together, visiting her family, where I had made a special effort to be pleasant to everyone. I viewed her attempt to then colonise the remainder of my day as an act of attempted domination. She was not content with me having toed the line all day, but wanted to see me yielding to her completely.

In short, I believe that her desire was not for meaningful communication; it was for obedience.

Wtf? I think most people who are in commited relationships are required to spend time with the other halfs family. A special effort to be pleasant to everyone surely that has nothing to to do with obedience and everything to do with social skills. Surely afterwards you could have been a bit more assertive and said "sorry my head is a bit melted I need some chill out time"

I have my own theory for why this was. I believe that women are driven by fantasy and jealousy. They see ads and movies where women are with these men who are like insanely devoted butlers, thinking of nothing but satisfying the woman's every whim. They become jealous of the fantasy women who are with the fantasy men, and every so often try to compete with the fantasy women and make their own lives resemble theirs. Then, when this doesn't work, it is someone else's fault.

thats one theory alright ;)although girls and guys are different in social settings and when i spend time with my OH family I am pleasant and make an effort. Its not exactly a draining experience that I need time out after though I know for him spending time with my family is more work. Different strokes and all the rest but wtf it has to do with a fantasy butler is quite beyond me

I thought that coming here, someone would provide me with some kind of alternative explanation for her behaviour, but I have seen none. In fact, you all seem to think the main point is something to do with tv etiquette or whether a girl or a dvd is more important...

Maybe she also had a draining day and wanted/needed to spend some time with you without competing with the DVD? prehaps if you find her family alot of work maybe she does too. Maybe loads of things but tbh your explanations above seem to be over analysing the reasons behind it?

paperclip2 · 07-10-2008 4:53pm

Christy Manure wrote: »

Hmm.

Let me clear up something I maybe should have mentioned earlier. We had already spent the whole day together, visiting her family, where I had made a special effort to be pleasant to everyone. I viewed her attempt to then colonise the remainder of my day as an act of attempted domination. She was not content with me having toed the line all day, but wanted to see me yielding to her completely.

In short, I believe that her desire was not for meaningful communication; it was for obedience.

I have my own theory for why this was. I believe that women are driven by fantasy and jealousy. They see ads and movies where women are with these men who are like insanely devoted butlers, thinking of nothing but satisfying the woman's every whim. They become jealous of the fantasy women who are with the fantasy men, and every so often try to compete with the fantasy women and make their own lives resemble theirs. Then, when this doesn't work, it is someone else's fault.

...

Oh. Dear. God.

She interupted your viewing pleasure. She didn't strap you into a gimp suit and use you as a foot stool!

On a serious note OP you really seem to dislike your GF to put it mildly. If something so minor in the grand scheme of things disturbs you so much then maybe you should look at why that is within the context of your relationship.

For the record I don't think that I'm motivated by fantasy and jealousy but I will ask my husbands opinion when I let him out this evening!

shellyboo · 07-10-2008 4:58pm

paperclip2 wrote: »

Oh. Dear. God.

She interupted your viewing pleasure. She didn't strap you into a gimp suit and use you as a foot stool!

On a serious note OP you really seem to dislike your GF to put it mildly. If something so minor in the grand scheme of things disturbs you so much then maybe you should look at why that is within the context of your relationship.

For the record I don't think that I'm motivated by fantasy and jealousy but I will ask my husbands opinion when I let him out this evening!

Don't forget his collar and leash in case he gets away to enjoy himself or something... since we all know that woman's sole purpose is to ruin our partners' lives

I too think that the OP seems to have a deeper issue than DVD time with his gf and maybe women in general. We're not all out to get you! Honest!

laurak265 · 07-10-2008 5:10pm

Clare Bear wrote: »

I know I'm one of few probably taking his side here (and apologies in advance to the regular Lady in question) but while she just wanted to chat with you and I understand that, you needed your relaxing time after a stressful day. Her converstation wasn't an important one, it could have waited. If it was me personally I would have gotten the hint and just left it until it was over. I'd expect the same if the roles were reversed. If her favourite programme came on or favourite DVD that she wanted to watch was on and you came in baffling away randomly I don't think she'd be too impressed either. I'm sure she could have waited an hour or two to talk about her scarf. It would be a completely different story if it was something important that she needed to talk about. Everyone needs their "me" time people!

Agreed! Id kill someone if i was watching desperate housewives or whatever and someone starting talking at me i'd freak out!

Hrududu · 07-10-2008 5:21pm

I hate it when people know you are watching something but still insist on interrupting with inane drivel. She knew he was watching something as she was asking about it.

Tar.Aldarion · 07-10-2008 5:33pm

Women shooting themselves in the feet here. On one hand saying how dare he not stop and talk to her, on the other saying they would go crazy if somebody interrupted one of their bollocks programs.

Pj! · 07-10-2008 5:44pm

Tara Le d'Arion wrote: »

Women shooting themselves in the feet here. On one hand saying how dare he not stop and talk to her, on the other saying they would go crazy if somebody interrupted one of their bollocks programs.

A program about bollocks??

I think the op dealt with the situation badly. Could have explained he was watching the tv and asked her to watch it with him. Could have said cuddle up until it's over, give her a foot massage, anything!

Then again his OH should have realised that he was interested in the program and left him be.

It's a fairly minor thing as things go! Enjoy what ye have!

(this message was brought to you by a single person)

F.A. · 07-10-2008 5:47pm

Christy Manure wrote: »

In short, I believe that her desire was not for meaningful communication; it was for obedience.

I have my own theory for why this was. I believe that women are driven by fantasy and jealousy. They see ads and movies where women are with these men who are like insanely devoted butlers, thinking of nothing but satisfying the woman's every whim. They become jealous of the fantasy women who are with the fantasy men, and every so often try to compete with the fantasy women and make their own lives resemble theirs. Then, when this doesn't work, it is someone else's fault.

If that is how you view women in general and your girlfriend in particular, pray remind us/yourself why you are with a woman in general and her in particular?

Seriously, can you not just stop the DVD for the five seconds it takes to tell her: "I'm totally knackered and really need to switch off right now. Can we talk later/tomorrow?"

If you can't master the art of basic communication, I wouldn't be surprised if she was indeed comparing you to 'fantasy' aka normal guys who don't need to blow something so banal completely out of proportion in what comes across as an attempt to belittle women.

Having said that, depending on how long you've known each other, I'm surprised she didn't pick up on you being less than impressed by her interrupting you. But even if she's just thick that way, I think she'd understand those few words of request I mentioned above. Hence my original question - sorry to be blunt.

Dragan · 07-10-2008 5:49pm

I'm actually starting to get the impression that the OP walked around the family do all day in an obvious "i don't want to be hear tone."

I'm also starting to think his OH new exactly what she was doing by interrupting his show! lol

John Mason · 07-10-2008 6:10pm

Dragan wrote: »

I'm actually starting to get the impression that the OP walked around the family do all day in an obvious "i don't want to be hear tone."

I'm also starting to think his OH new exactly what she was doing by interrupting his show! lol

QFT

Reku · 07-10-2008 7:01pm

Thaedydal wrote: »

See her problem clearly is she forgot Barbra Woodhouses advice,
"ChokeChain" or better yet a remote shock collar which will repond to a verbal command so she doesn't have to chip her nail polish pressing a button to get you to conform when you act up.

:rolleyes:

Yes, and clearly he forgot his Honeymooners' advice:

"One of these days...one of these days...POW, right in the kisser!"

That'll shut her up...:p

Tara Le d'Arion wrote: »

Women shooting themselves in the feet here. On one hand saying how dare he not stop and talk to her, on the other saying they would go crazy if somebody interrupted one of their bollocks programs.

Alas, some women aren't good at thinking logically which makes them rather prone to blatent hypocrisy and yet somehow being disturbingly ignorant of this.

I do have to wonder if the OP would stop the DVD to listen to her if she was clearly upset and needed to unload, I also have to wonder though if her behaviour is perhaps a sign of lack of respect for the OP. Could be bad signs from both sides.

nomorebadtown · 07-10-2008 7:25pm

He says / she says

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