nav[aria-label="Primary Navigation"] { padding: 0; & ul { list-style: none; width: 100%; display: flex; flex-direction: row; justify-content: start; align-items: start; gap: 30px; padding: 0; & li { margin: 0; } & ul li { list-style: none; } } }

Child Item

‘People think I’m the devil for having an abortion, but it’s the only option that&

RobYourBuilder

‘People think I’m the devil for having an abortion, but it’s the only option that’s right for me’

A YOUNG CORK woman has spoken out about her experience of travelling to Britain for an abortion in a new BBC documentary.

Tara has allowed the programme follow her on her journey to a clinic in Ealing, London, just two weeks after she found out she was pregnant.

The programme, ’Abortion: Ireland’s Guilty Secret?’, airs on BBC Three tomorrow evening at 9pm.

The 24-year-old is just one of the 5,000 Irish women who travel to the UK for an abortion every year.

She said she wanted to share her story publicly as it is something no one talks about.

I am sure there are people out there that think I am the devil for doing this, but I know myself that it is the only option that feels right to me right now.

Tara said being forced to travel to England for the procedure does make her feel like a criminal.

I think there is stigma attached to it as you have to leave the country for it.

She admitted she had questioned whether she was making the right decision.

At times I feel guilty… but I think I would be able to give a lot more to a child ten years down the line than I can now.

Travelling over 500 miles to have an abortion cost Tara and Steve over £1000.

I could hardly get clean… parts of my body or baby that was a part of me just coming a part inside of me, on an aeroplane – it was just horrific – very unfair, compared to girls who are living in UK while we are expected to travel and pay.

The rest of the world can see this is wrong. We are part of a western society and yet it hasn’t changed yet.

http://www.thejournal.ie/bbc-abortion-ireland-uk-1918197-Feb2015/

Very brave and courageous of her to come forward, waive her anonymity and to take part in the documentary. Braver person than I. Hopefully the documentary reasonates with some and emphasises the point that we should no longer put women through this on top of what is already a very stressful ordeal. Forcing them to travel and cough up circa €1,300 is not very humane.

Twelve women a day take the boat, it's time we stopped exporting this issue and legislate for it at home.

Find more posts tagged with

Quick Links

Comments

RobertKK

AlexisM wrote: »

What on earth does that even mean? 'a far more privileged chance of life'? What is that? The words don't even make sense strung together like that.

There was no possible guillotine hanging over my life due to my mother not in favour of abortion.
For millions of unborn lives there is.

So some unborn are more privileged because their outcome is safe from an unnatural outcome, as their mother's stance is anti-abortion.
The less privileged unborn lives end up in an abortion clinic.

traprunner

RobertKK wrote: »

My mother was against abortion, my right to life which I was given was never in doubt unless a natural abortion had happened.
It gave me a far more privileged chance of life before I was born due to the stance taken by my mother.

So you are saying that your mother choose not to abort you. She always had a choice regardless of what she was for and against. That's fine. None of the mothers of the posters here choose to abort them. We are all in the same boat. Congratulations, you are just as privileged as the rest of us.

It does not change the fact that you have no right to dictate what any person does to their body, be it abortion, piercings, tattoos or even plucking a hair.

Ave Sodalis

RobertKK wrote: »

There was no possible guillotine hanging over my life due to my mother not in favour of abortion.
For millions of unborn lives there is.

So some unborn are more privileged because their outcome is safe from an unnatural outcome, as their mother's stance is anti-abortion.
The less privileged unborn lives end up in an abortion clinic.

I had the "privilege" of life but that doesn't mean I had a privileged life. Again, I wouldn't have judged my mother if she had an abortion.

Delirium

wonderfullife wrote: »

If you are in favour of subsidising abortions then you open the floodgates for people wanting all sorts of procedures subsidised. A tummy tuck or gastric op would in theory save tax payers a lot in the long run as obesity causes long term health problems and burdens the health infrastructure.

I'm pretty sure gastric bands are already covered by public health/tax payers.

In fact, in 2008, people had to go abroad due to long waiting lists here

and more recently

RobertKK

traprunner wrote: »

So you are saying that your mother choose not to abort you. She always had a choice regardless of what she was for and against. That's fine. None of the mothers of the posters here choose to abort them. We are all in the same boat. Congratulations, you are just as privileged as the rest of us.

It does not change the fact that you have no right to dictate what any person does to their body, be it abortion, piercings, tattoos or even plucking a hair.

If abortion was legal here, you can be sure not everyone who currently is posting, would be posting their opinions...

eviltwin

RobertKK wrote: »

If abortion was legal here, you can be sure not everyone who currently is posting, would be posting their opinions...

If all our parents hadn't had sex that day none of us would be posting here. Its pure chance any of us exist at all.

Ave Sodalis

RobertKK wrote: »

If abortion was legal here, you can be sure not everyone who currently is posting, would be posting their opinions...

I wouldn't have a problem with that. You can't miss what you never had. Thus far I've been talking as though I had a consciousness after abortion but there's a fairly good chance I wouldn't so why would it matter to me if I had been aborted?

kylith

What about all the lives that abortion saves?

I went out with a guy in my teens who told me that his mother had had an abortion when she was in her late teens/early twenties. If she had not been able to terminate that pregnancy she would have been a penniless single mother struggling to make ends meet on benefits in a council house in London. She would never have finished her education and gotten the job that enabled her to meet his father. They would never have gotten married. My then boyfriend and his siblings would never have been conceived. He would never have grown up to go on to become a paramedic, as he is now, and to save however many dozens of lives that he has. He would never have met his wife. His children would never have been born. So much happiness brought into the world. So many wonderful, kind people born because a young woman had not been forced to have a baby she wasn't ready for and couldn't support, and hadn't had to drop out of college and go on benefits.

People only think of abortion as ending a potential life. It's a striking feeling to talk to someone, and sit and have dinner with a family, that wouldn't exist were it not for abortion.

Your Superior

eviltwin wrote: »

If all our parents hadn't had sex that day none of us would be posting here. Its pure chance any of us exist at all.

The miracle of Evolution.

RobertKK

sup_dude wrote: »

I had the "privilege" of life but that doesn't mean I had a privileged life. Again, I wouldn't have judged my mother if she had an abortion.

No one talking about a privileged life, just the privilege of life.

Ave Sodalis

RobertKK wrote: »

No one talking about a privileged life, just the privilege of life.

Life isn't always a privilege

RobertKK

kylith wrote: »

What about all the lives that abortion saves?

I went out with a guy in my teens who told me that his mother had had an abortion when she was in her late teens/early twenties. If she had not been able to terminate that pregnancy she would have been a penniless single mother struggling to make ends meet on benefits in a council house in London. She would never have finished her education and gotten the job that enabled her to meet his father. They would never have gotten married. My then boyfriend and his siblings would never have been conceived. He would never have grown up to go on to become a paramedic, as he is now, and to save however many dozens of lives that he has. He would never have met his wife. His children would never have been born. So much happiness brought into the world. So many wonderful, kind people born because a young woman had not been forced to have a baby she wasn't ready for and couldn't support, and hadn't had to drop out of college and go on benefits.

People only think of abortion as ending a potential life. It's a striking feeling to talk to someone, and sit and have dinner with a family, that wouldn't exist were it not for abortion.

She could have used the adoption services and kept her education going.

Ave Sodalis

RobertKK wrote: »

She could have used the adoption services and kept her education going.

She could have, but she didn't and the psychological problem that could have been caused by adoption, could have meant she never met her husband either.

RobertKK

sup_dude wrote: »

Life isn't always a privilege

Life is what you make it. Some moan and expect things to happen without doing anything.

RobertKK

sup_dude wrote: »

She could have, but she didn't and the psychological problem that could have been caused by adoption, could have meant she never met her husband either.

But look at all the lives that could have existed by adoption.

The argument used can be turned around on it's head.

RobertKK

eviltwin wrote: »

If all our parents hadn't had sex that day none of us would be posting here. Its pure chance any of us exist at all.

There is pure chance, then there is no chance.

Ave Sodalis

RobertKK wrote: »

Life is what you make it. Some moan and expect things to happen without doing anything.

Cool yeah. My mother ended up starving herself at the end of every week to make sure I was fed. We went without so much that other kids would get no problem.

Oddly enough, if someone was going to end up like that, they could have an abortion and then they wouldn't have to end up like that.

eviltwin

RobertKK wrote: »

She could have used the adoption services and kept her education going.

At what personal cost?

I value my mental health as much as my physical. If I had a physical ailment that pregnancy would negatively affect me in a physical way I think most people would support me ending that pregnancy. It would be for health reasons after all.

What about my mental health? If I choose to have an abortion to protect that why is that not okay? If I know that having the baby or putting it up for adoption will be harder for me than an abortion why is that not okay?

kylith

RobertKK wrote: »

She could have used the adoption services and kept her education going.

Could she have? Would she have been able to hand it over when it was born? Would her education have survived having to take the months' long break that a pregnancy would have necessitated? Would she have been mentally able to go back to education? Would she have spent the rest of her life torturing herself about what had happened to the child? As has been said upthread giving a child up for adoption is a hell of a lot more psychologically damaging than having an abortion. Would the child have languished in a home for years and been physically and sexually abused?

Ave Sodalis

RobertKK wrote: »

But look at all the lives that could have existed by adoption.

The argument used can be turned around on it's head.

It could have, but it didn't. The posters point was that life still happened despite abortion.

RobertKK

eviltwin wrote: »

At what personal cost?

I value my mental health as much as my physical. If I had a physical ailment that pregnancy would negatively affect me in a physical way I think most people would support me ending that pregnancy. It would be for health reasons after all.

What about my mental health? If I choose to have an abortion to protect that why is that not okay? If I know that having the baby or putting it up for adoption will be harder for me than an abortion why is that not okay?

Abortion is not a mental health treatment.

Ave Sodalis

RobertKK wrote: »

Abortion is not a mental health treatment.

It less of a stress on mental health than adoption

eviltwin

RobertKK wrote: »

Abortion is not a mental health treatment.

I never said it was

RobertKK

sup_dude wrote: »

It could have, but it didn't. The posters point was that life still happened despite abortion.

Were these people going to become infertile if there was no abortion? They could have met other people and have created more lives.

Drumpot

kylith wrote: »

It is not any woman's job to put herself through a painful and dangerous experience to supply children for other people.

In fact, I can't think how I could carry a pregnancy and go about my daily life with people telling me how excited I must be and to have to see the look of judgement on their face when I tell them I'm giving it away. And it's not just friends and family; pregnant women are fair game for any Nosey Nelly on the street.

Who ever said being pregnant was easy ?

And why would you make a huge decision to abort a child mainly because of what people would say or think ? What do you care about what random nosey Nellys think ?

Who said "it was a woman's job to put her body through a painful and dangerous experience"? Stop putting sensationalist words in my posts. I never said that. Giving birth is a natural process and not nearly as dangerous as your post suggest, unless of course you have statistics to back up how dangerous it is ? I am not speaking about people having abortions on medical grounds, that's a completely different conversation in relation to what I am writing.

You have a right to believe that having an abortion for ANY reason is fine, as I have a right to believe that having an abortion simply because it doesn't suit your lifestyle is not an admirable trait I would be looking to encourage.

sunshine and showers

RobertKK wrote: »

Life is what you make it. Some moan and expect things to happen without doing anything.

That's the most overly simplistic piece of nonsense yet. Next you'll be telling us the people in America working four jobs to make rent are too lazy for "the American dream".

The basic argument you have with most posters here, Robert, appears to be more of a question of when life actually begins. You think it's conception - some of the rest of us don't.

I am personally of the opinion that a foetus becomes a "baby" at the point of viability outside the womb. Before that, I think it's a woman's choice whether she wishes to use her body to ultimately produce another human or not. Pregnancy and adoption are not the picnic you seem to think they are.

kidneyfan

eviltwin wrote: »

What about my mental health? If I choose to have an abortion to protect that why is that not okay? If I know that having the baby or putting it up for adoption will be harder for me than an abortion why is that not okay?

Are you a psychiatrist?
Mad people don't know what is best for their mental health.

kylith

RobertKK wrote: »

Life is what you make it. Some moan and expect things to happen without doing anything.

Tell that to the kids left to roam the streets pretty much as soon as they're old enough to walk. Neglected and starved by parents who never really wanted them in the first place. Tell them that life is what they make it and to quit whinging.

RobertKK

sup_dude wrote: »

It less of a stress on mental health than adoption

Yet I was reading Nicki Minaj saying in Rolling Stone magazine how she is 'haunted' by the abortion she had.
Abortion is not easy, neither is adoption but with abortion you cannot undo it, while you can look to find the child you gave up for adoption.

smash

RobertKK wrote: »

She could have used the adoption services and kept her education going.

Why should she? It's traumatic for her body and mind to go through a pregnancy. Trauma that she doesn't need to endure.