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Child Item

My first go - title "The Madman?"

padraiggg

Chapter 1

A man in a hat entered the room. He took off the hat. “It's you!” They all said. At the same time like a class speaking to a teacher. “Hahaha Hello gentleman”, the man in the hat said, putting the hat on the table. “And hello ladies he said. Turning to the ladies and lifting his hat politely. “Leave us alone Trent!” The women said. Perhaps it was because the were angry at him for something he had done in the past, a long, long time ago. Or perhaps it was because he was holding a gun at them! The gun came from nowhere. He had got it out of his pocket and now both bullets were aimed at the people.”Say your prayers!” The man said but one of the men grabbed the gun, knocking the table with the hat on it and some other things on the floor. A vase got broken. Now the gun was in the other hands and we would have to wait and see if it was the right hands.

got this far, now got to work out what happens next!

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Jackobyte

"EPIC! " thought ternt, "hahahaha

loved it!

Glico Man

Dear god my life has been completed then taken swiftly away with a Peeoww...this time the gun had bullets

awesome thread

Trent equals legend

ytpe2r5bxkn0c1

Sorry people but I have never read such dross. Utter crap! Spelling poor, punctuation worse. Story line - where? Accuracy -"both bullets aimed"??? Realisim - never. Written on the hoof - definately. Class - bottom.

goatboyrua

this is Trent you're talking about?

Jackobyte

Axton Acidic Reindeer wrote: »

Sorry people but I have never read such dross. Utter crap! Spelling poor, punctuation worse. Story line - where? Accuracy -"both bullets aimed"??? Realisim - never. Written on the hoof - definately. Class - bottom.

Thats what gives it its soul and makes it entertaining. Can you honestly say you didn't laugh at any point when reading it?

Jay P

Axton Acidic Reindeer wrote: »

Sorry people but I have never read such dross. Utter crap! Spelling poor, punctuation worse. Story line - where? Accuracy -"both bullets aimed"??? Realisim - never. Written on the hoof - definately. Class - bottom.

:rolleyes:
Sentence Fragment.

This is Trent. He doesn't need any of your grammar and correct writing.

Dave!

Axton Acidic Reindeer wrote: »

Sorry people but I have never read such dross. Utter crap! Spelling poor, punctuation worse. Story line - where? Accuracy -"both bullets aimed"??? Realisim - never. Written on the hoof - definately. Class - bottom.

ppfffffffffffffffffffffffff

Dancor

Axton Acidic Reindeer wrote: »

Sorry people but I have never read such dross. Utter crap! Spelling poor, punctuation worse. Story line - where? Accuracy -"both bullets aimed"??? Realisim - never. Written on the hoof - definately. Class - bottom.

:rolleyes:
Just dont jump on the bandwagon when this becomes an international best seller and highest earning/award winning movie of all time.

ytpe2r5bxkn0c1

Jackobyte wrote: »

Can you honestly say you didn't laugh at any point when reading it?

Yes!

ytpe2r5bxkn0c1

Jay P wrote: »

:He doesn't need any of your grammar and correct writing.

Nor substance nor wit.

Jeanious

Axton Acidic Reindeer wrote: »

Nor substance nor wit.

peeeow....peeeow peeeow peeeow peeeow!!! dead

Toto Wolfcastle

coyle wrote: »

peeeow....peeeow peeeow peeeow peeeow!!! dead

Hahaha!

padraiggg

Axton Acidic Reindeer wrote: »

Sorry people but I have never read such dross. Utter crap! Spelling poor, punctuation worse. Story line - where? Accuracy -"both bullets aimed"??? Realisim - never. Written on the hoof - definately. Class - bottom.

oh dear your not going to like this then

The malady of discontent part ii

The antiques man picked up the pot very carefully it was very fragile like your nans voice when shes been out in the cold.He was wearing white gloves like a mickey mouse. Then he heard someone say "ancient etruscan i beleieve most likely 1576bc absolutely priceless of course" he turned round a man was standing there wearing some brand new €134 trousers. And a hat. A passing secretary fainted at how clever the thing she had just heard was. The two men stared silently for a second at the precious beauty in front of them... SNAPKICK! The antiques man looked down, at the end of his arms was a mess of shattered hands and pottery. Two seconds and various kung fu moves later he was knocked out. The antiques man woke up he could feel something on his back, he turned his head, there was a heavily muscled man having sex with a half conscious secretary on his back. "tell me the information, i know you work for the boss i lost a good pair of trousers that day who set me up?" said the man. "who..who are you?" asked the antiques man. Trent was so shocked he almost stopped having sex with the secretary. He looked at the man in the eyes and the man knew at once who he was dealing with. Trent asked him another question but it was to late the man had died because of fear! Trent tossed the secreatary into a shelf of antique door handles in disgust. He would have to ge tthe information another way. He dived out of the office window leaving behind him trail of broken antiques, fingers and hearts.

Sir Gallagher

coyle wrote: »

Originally Posted by Srameen
Nor substance nor wit.

peeeow....peeeow peeeow peeeow peeeow!!! dead

Hahaha! Merry Christmas!

BluesBerry

Axton Acidic Reindeer wrote: »

Sorry people but I have never read such dross. Utter crap! Spelling poor, punctuation worse. Story line - where? Accuracy -"both bullets aimed"??? Realisim - never. Written on the hoof - definately. Class - bottom.

What!!!!! Never insult the Trent in my presence :eek:

Trent for Taoiseach !!!!!;)

Toto Wolfcastle

padraiggg wrote: »

Trent was so shocked he almost stopped having sex with the secretary.

Trent would never do something so silly!

Pure genius!

electrogrimey

Great work by everyone involved on the post of the day, kudos Dr. Gonzo.

francie BradyII

Trent has blown me away and i never saw it coming. Keep up the good work!

goatboyrua

ah top nacho!! was wondering what that loveable rogue was going to do next

SNAPKICK!!!!

GhostInTheRuins

Only discovered this thread now and I'm in tears here, I haven't laughed so much quite a while.

This is the the best thread ever on boards, no contest.

Keep it up Padraiggg!

GhostInTheRuins

DimestoreSaint

padraiggg wrote: »

oh dear your not going to like this then
.

Don't get me wrong, I've loved everything so far, but that probably got the loudest laugh out of me!

Basq

Trent tossed the secreatary into a shelf of antique door handles in disgust

Just stunning!

Aldebaran

SNAPKICK!

Tar.Aldarion

A passing secretary fainted at how clever the thing she had just heard was.

The antiques man woke up he could feel something on his back, he turned his head, there was a heavily muscled man having sex with a half conscious secretary on his back

LOL

Osgoodisgood

padraiggg wrote: »

The antiques man looked down, at the end of his arms was a mess of shattered hands and pottery. Two seconds and various kung fu moves later he was knocked out.

Genius

~me~

Ive been sent away from the sitting room on two occassions from laughing at this thread so much (and also at the man falling on RTE news thread!)! its hilarious! well done!

Rekop dog

~me~ wrote: »

Ive been sent away from the sitting room on two occassions from laughing at this thread so much (and also at the man falling on RTE news thread!)! its hilarious! well done!

Who gets thrown out of they're own sitting room for laughing? Who are your parents- the hitlers!!?

~me~

Rekop dog wrote: »

Who gets thrown out of they're own sitting room for laughing? Who are your parents- the hitlers!!?

boyfriend was trying to watch tv! i was laughing quite hysterically though, and id stop for a minute and then the fact that he was gettin annoyed at my laughter made me laugh more and then i made the mistake of trying to read it out to him to make him understand why i was laughing, it went something like this- "trent..bahahaha..tr..bahaha"- which irritated him more!

Poor Uncle Tom

~me~ wrote: »

boyfriend was trying to watch tv! i was laughing quite hysterically though, and id stop for a minute and then the fact that he was gettin annoyed at my laughter made me laugh more and then i made the mistake of trying to read it out to him to make him understand why i was laughing, it went something like this- "trent..bahahaha..tr..bahaha"- which irritated him more!

Snapkick him..!