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Dumb/Great Facebook Status {merge} [No Names] - Part II

G_R

Original thread here: http://www.boards.ie/vbulletin/showthread.php?t=2056238863

Last thread hit 10k posts so needed to be closed.

Remember, no personally identifiable information please and thanks.

Anyway, as you were

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SusieBlue

Think I'm going to shave my hair fully off and ya I have an alibi for May this yearabout saying something about people around the town as I'm I home everyday of the week
barely leave my house only to do my shopping of the week or run to the shop for something I forgot or something I ran out of and my Facebook pages was blocked by headquarters for making too many pages
didn't know that they do that but they do and any page you make after you get blocked also gets blocked a day or 2 after you make it so didn't use Facebook all of may so therefore I couldn't have written anything about anyone and my pages in June that I made were blocked within a day they mostly blocked my pages in under half an hour so therefore I didn't write anything about anyone in May or June and half of July

I made pages but we're blocked by headquarters I have proof of that from my friend and the fella who dropped me up to get the dog and pick up his girl on the way as his mother and her were shopping and they wanted to show my ex a pic of the dog I said I can't cause I've no Facebook for being blocked
I had to send my friend the pic threw snapchat there is my proof of an alibi when anyone ever accuses me of anything again make sure ye have proof
cause I be sure to have an alibi for everything from now on sick and tired of being accused by people I may write stuff and give out to people on Facebook but I sure as hell don't accuse them of things
and I don't shout and roar in public at people but at least I have my proof and my alibies I was actually using the app Smule singing app that Let me record and save my records and I was using the smile singing app in May June and July and was watching my Netflix and Playing Fortnite and GTA 5 so there is my proof

(Paragraphs added by me)

corner of hells

SusieBlue wrote: »

Think I'm going to shave my hair fully off and ya I have an alibi for May this yearabout saying something about people around the town as I'm I home everyday of the week
barely leave my house only to do my shopping of the week or run to the shop for something I forgot or something I ran out of and my Facebook pages was blocked by headquarters for making too many pages
didn't know that they do that but they do and any page you make after you get blocked also gets blocked a day or 2 after you make it so didn't use Facebook all of may so therefore I couldn't have written anything about anyone and my pages in June that I made were blocked within a day they mostly blocked my pages in under half an hour so therefore I didn't write anything about anyone in May or June and half of July

I made pages but we're blocked by headquarters I have proof of that from my friend and the fella who dropped me up to get the dog and pick up his girl on the way as his mother and her were shopping and they wanted to show my ex a pic of the dog I said I can't cause I've no Facebook for being blocked
I had to send my friend the pic threw snapchat there is my proof of an alibi when anyone ever accuses me of anything again make sure ye have proof
cause I be sure to have an alibi for everything from now on sick and tired of being accused by people I may write stuff and give out to people on Facebook but I sure as hell don't accuse them of things
and I don't shout and roar in public at people but at least I have my proof and my alibies I was actually using the app Smule singing app that Let me record and save my records and I was using the smile singing app in May June and July and was watching my Netflix and Playing Fortnite and GTA 5 so there is my proof

(Paragraphs added by me)

Take out the paragraphs, it might make it easier to understand.

Gwen Cooper

SusieBlue wrote: »

Think I'm going to shave my hair fully off and ya I have an alibi for May this yearabout saying something about people around the town as I'm I home everyday of the week
barely leave my house only to do my shopping of the week or run to the shop for something I forgot or something I ran out of and my Facebook pages was blocked by headquarters for making too many pages
didn't know that they do that but they do and any page you make after you get blocked also gets blocked a day or 2 after you make it so didn't use Facebook all of may so therefore I couldn't have written anything about anyone and my pages in June that I made were blocked within a day they mostly blocked my pages in under half an hour so therefore I didn't write anything about anyone in May or June and half of July

I made pages but we're blocked by headquarters I have proof of that from my friend and the fella who dropped me up to get the dog and pick up his girl on the way as his mother and her were shopping and they wanted to show my ex a pic of the dog I said I can't cause I've no Facebook for being blocked
I had to send my friend the pic threw snapchat there is my proof of an alibi when anyone ever accuses me of anything again make sure ye have proof
cause I be sure to have an alibi for everything from now on sick and tired of being accused by people I may write stuff and give out to people on Facebook but I sure as hell don't accuse them of things
and I don't shout and roar in public at people but at least I have my proof and my alibies I was actually using the app Smule singing app that Let me record and save my records and I was using the smile singing app in May June and July and was watching my Netflix and Playing Fortnite and GTA 5 so there is my proof

(Paragraphs added by me)

Does she have a new profile again? I'm getting lost :eek:

Paddy Cow

SusieBlue wrote: »

Think I'm going to shave my hair fully off and ya I have an alibi for May this yearabout saying something about people around the town as I'm I home everyday of the week
barely leave my house only to do my shopping of the week or run to the shop for something I forgot or something I ran out of and my Facebook pages was blocked by headquarters for making too many pages
didn't know that they do that but they do and any page you make after you get blocked also gets blocked a day or 2 after you make it so didn't use Facebook all of may so therefore I couldn't have written anything about anyone and my pages in June that I made were blocked within a day they mostly blocked my pages in under half an hour so therefore I didn't write anything about anyone in May or June and half of July

I made pages but we're blocked by headquarters I have proof of that from my friend and the fella who dropped me up to get the dog and pick up his girl on the way as his mother and her were shopping and they wanted to show my ex a pic of the dog I said I can't cause I've no Facebook for being blocked
I had to send my friend the pic threw snapchat there is my proof of an alibi when anyone ever accuses me of anything again make sure ye have proof
cause I be sure to have an alibi for everything from now on sick and tired of being accused by people I may write stuff and give out to people on Facebook but I sure as hell don't accuse them of things
and I don't shout and roar in public at people but at least I have my proof and my alibies I was actually using the app Smule singing app that Let me record and save my records and I was using the smile singing app in May June and July and was watching my Netflix and Playing Fortnite and GTA 5 so there is my proof

(Paragraphs added by me)

Any idea what she's talking about Susie?

dreamers75

we need context!!!!!!

HorrorScope

Paddy Cow wrote: »

Any idea what she's talking about Susie?

Shaving her head??
Alibi for May this year because she playing video games and people are saying she wasn’t??
She has proof she was playing them because she was using a singing app on her phone??
And making multiple Facebook pages that end up getting blocked....

I think this person needs sectioning and that’s no joke, clearly something very very wrong in their head

SusieBlue

HorrorScope wrote: »

Shaving her head??
Alibi for May this year because she playing video games and people are saying she wasn’t??
She has proof she was playing them because she was using a singing app on her phone??
And making multiple Facebook pages that end up getting blocked....

I think this person needs sectioning and that’s no joke, clearly something very very wrong in their head

Pretty much the above. She’s being accused of talking about someone behind their back and she’s saying she couldn’t have because she was at home live streaming herself playing video games on FB when the incident allegedly occurred.
She then got banned from FB for a few months so she’s using that as proof that she couldn’t have been talking about the person online either.
And she also wants to shave her head.

Paddy Cow

HorrorScope wrote: »

Shaving her head??
Alibi for May this year because she playing video games and people are saying she wasn’t??
She has proof she was playing them because she was using a singing app on her phone??
And making multiple Facebook pages that end up getting blocked....

I think this person needs sectioning and that’s no joke, clearly something very very wrong in their head

Seems someone made a page that p!ssed someone else off but it can't have been her because headquarters?? have been blocking most of her pages since May. I'm getting a headache trying to make sense of it.

sligojoek

Sinead O Connor?

HorrorScope

SusieBlue wrote: »

Pretty much the above. She’s being accused of talking about someone behind their back and she’s saying she couldn’t have because she was at home live streaming herself playing video games on FB when the incident allegedly occurred.
She then got banned from FB for a few months so she’s using that as proof that she couldn’t have been talking about the person online either.
And she also wants to shave her head.

I don’t whether to feel pity for her or laugh - she seriously needs help though and that’s a fact. Is this the same crazy dog woman??

Foweva Awone

Chillaxed To The Max #FridayFeeling Yuuuup Waiting On A Takeaway & Spend The Day With My Child #SideKick . Nice Fresh Day Out Then, But Sure If I Go To Da Park Wiv Her She Be Asleep By 7 .So Naw Luv . She'l Thank Me Later When Tha #ToyShow Starts . Myt Hav A Few Cold Ones Fr It . #FestiveSeason #WhackinOutDahTuneees

Simmer down

Foweva Awone wrote: »

Chillaxed To The Max #FridayFeeling Yuuuup Waiting On A Takeaway & Spend The Day With My Child #SideKick . Nice Fresh Day Out Then, But Sure If I Go To Da Park Wiv Her She Be Asleep By 7 .So Naw Luv . She'l Thank Me Later When Tha #ToyShow Starts . Myt Hav A Few Cold Ones Fr It . #FestiveSeason #WhackinOutDahTuneees

Positive attitude anyway #Yuuuup!

It wasnt me123

Foweva Awone wrote: »

Chillaxed To The Max #FridayFeeling Yuuuup Waiting On A Takeaway & Spend The Day With My Child #SideKick . Nice Fresh Day Out Then, But Sure If I Go To Da Park Wiv Her She Be Asleep By 7 .So Naw Luv . She'l Thank Me Later When Tha #ToyShow Starts . Myt Hav A Few Cold Ones Fr It . #FestiveSeason #WhackinOutDahTuneees

Yuupp don't take your child to the park to play in the fresh air with other children, better she sits in watching you drink and watch tv - much healthier choice, not

Bigbagofcans

Simmer down wrote: »

Positive attitude anyway #Yuuuup!

#CapitaliseEveryWord

Foweva Awone

It wasnt me123 wrote: »

Yuupp don't take your child to the park to play in the fresh air with other children, better she sits in watching you drink and watch tv - much healthier choice, not

Should I also mention I met this girl in rehab ... now I'll be honest, I'm actually extremely fond of her and of her daughter, but I cringe when she posts on Facebook about having "a few cold ones". One cold one is one too many for the likes of me and her!!

KM792

Can anyone give me alone please

Yes you read that right,she doesn't specify if it's a car lone or a holiday lone but I'l personally drive her to the Kredit Younnyun if she posts it anymore.

RhubarbCrumble

KM792 wrote: »

Can anyone give me alone please

Yes you read that right,she doesn't specify if it's a car lone or a holiday lone but I'l personally drive her to the Kredit Younnyun if she posts it anymore.

Perhaps she 'vants to be alone'.

Foweva Awone

"The little man there now too goodly King gbh loved"

Goodly King

[Deleted User]

Plot twists

https://twitter.com/sonofhound/status/1200711873039097856

aoh

Special prayers for our pom (dogs name)! He is in pretty bad shape. We will know on Tuesday if he will make it or not!

Mena Mitty

In response to 'How did you get on chick'

I axed him last nite n he deneyed evrything. L8ers x

Hotblack Desiato

aoh wrote: »

Special prayers for our pom (dogs name)! He is in pretty bad shape. We will know on Tuesday if he will make it or not!

Is the dog baptised?

coolhull

"I made pasta for supper"

"What if I don't want pasta?"

"Why. Are you lack toast and told her aunt? "

"Pardon?"

"Lack toast and told her aunt. You know, that thing where you can't have dairy food."

"Lactose intolerant, you mean.."

"Isn't that what I said?"

sportsfan90

"Luv me knew black Pugh Joe 206"

aoh

Hotblack Desiato wrote: »

Is the dog baptised?

Not sure about that (I hope not!!) but

"Tonight we said goodbye to my companion, he knew me by grandma! My heart is broke into pieces! We had 12 good year's .he went camping ,long car rides to see my moms dog. He went every where with me! I'm so lost right now! RIP (dog name) go be with my dad and mama cat! I'll love you forever!"

Lots of luvs'n'hugs'n'prayers in the comments plus a load of RIP. It's a fupping dog!!

Leg End Reject

sportsfan90 wrote: »

"Luv me knew black Pugh Joe 206"

How are people this illiterate, the correct spelling is on the car?

Big Nasty

aoh wrote: »

It's a fupping dog!!

Most animals I've known are nicer than most people I've known

Paddy Cow

aoh wrote: »

Not sure about that (I hope not!!) but

"Tonight we said goodbye to my companion, he knew me by grandma! My heart is broke into pieces! We had 12 good year's .he went camping ,long car rides to see my moms dog. He went every where with me! I'm so lost right now! RIP (dog name) go be with my dad and mama cat! I'll love you forever!"

Lots of luvs'n'hugs'n'prayers in the comments plus a load of RIP. It's a fupping dog!!

I wouldn't go plastering it all over facebook but if one of my dogs died I'd feel exactly the same. I'd be devastated.

aoh

Paddy Cow wrote: »

I wouldn't go plastering it all over facebook but if one of my dogs died I'd feel exactly the same. I'd be devastated.

I understand that but it was all the RIP that got me.

Accepting Cookies

Posts some life advice/word of inspiration meme but your experience of the person who posted it never does anything but the opposite in real life. It makes me laugh and roll my eyes in equal measure.