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The words "died unexpectedly" on a death notice.

Itssoeasy

I've never understood this being put on death notices. People do die suddenly but death at some point isn't unexpected.

I mean if you're in your 70s or 80s then you are expecting to die. I'm sure people want to live as long as they can but when it does happen it's not unexpected.

Yes I had a lot of time to think over the weekend and it was something that came up.

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corner of hells

endacl wrote: »

bottlebrush wrote: »

The thing about death notices that I don't understand are the ones that read like CVs. I read one recently that had all the qualifications of the deceased ie a string of letters after her name and not only that but had all the academic credentials of her surviving relatives listed as well. is the man at the pearly gates going to ask her how successful she and her relations were in academia before deciding whether she gets in or not? I mean when I read the death notice I would have known who she was anyway without all that palaver.

I totally agree.

Endacl MSc PGradDip HDip Bmus.

Alphabet spaghetti for tea ?

bottlebrush

endacl wrote: »

I totally agree.

Endacl MSc PGradDip HDip Bmus.

care of The Music Department, Heaven.

whisky_galore

darkdubh wrote: »

Often an euphemism for suicide, especially if it was a quite young person. It's probably the biggest killer in this country for under 40's.

"Personal tragedy" is a common euphemism.

Cee-Jay-Cee

Theodore Fluffy Net wrote: »

The death has occurred of colour-blind Fred. He thought the lights were green when they were red.

That's not the way colour blindness works, no one mistakes one colour for another. They see colours differently but they still call that colour the same name as you or someone who is not colour blind. Sorry.

Anyway back on topic, I always found the line 'died suddenly' a little amusing, everyone dies suddenly, in that one second they were alive and the next they weren't.

ytpe2r5bxkn0c1

Cee-Jay-Cee wrote: »

That's not the way colour blindness works, no one mistakes one colour for another. They see colours differently but they still call that colour the same name as you or someone who is not colour blind. Sorry.

Anyway back on topic, I always found the line 'died suddenly' a little amusing, everyone dies suddenly, in that one second they were alive and the next they weren't.

Jeez!!!!

It's called a gag, not intended to be scientifically nor biologically accurate.

whoopsadoodles

Cee-Jay-Cee wrote: »

That's not the way colour blindness works, no one mistakes one colour for another. They see colours differently but they still call that colour the same name as you or someone who is not colour blind. Sorry.

Well you're not going to die laughing, that's for sure.

andekwarhola

The margins about where to mine for annoyance in everyday life are really becoming infinitesimal.

Itssoeasy

Vex Willems wrote: »

How hard is it to understand that people who aren't ill die unexpectedly!

I'd use the word suddenly then as that person who wasn't ill did die suddenly. If the person is ill they normally say after a long or brief illness. Also reading a few of the posts, I wouldn't have known about the apparent ways of not saying suicide on a death notice.

Also we Irish really have some inventive ways of getting around awkward family situations. Like saying "and his friend x"

[Deleted User]

andekwarhola wrote: »

The margins about where to mine for annoyance in everyday life are really becoming infinitesimal.

I am needlessly offended by your intelligence and eloquent observation.

You shall, perhaps, die unexpectedly! Have at thee, warmonger! :eek:

the_syco

bottlebrush wrote: »

I read one recently that had all the qualifications of the deceased ie a string of letters after her name

If her name is common, the creds would allow people who knew her know that she had died.

It's also done out of respect of who she was.

Cee-Jay-Cee wrote: »

Anyway back on topic, I always found the line 'died suddenly' a little amusing, everyone dies suddenly, in that one second they were alive and the next they weren't.

I find that someone dying unexpectedly would often mean that they weren't in the hospital or nursing home when it happened.

and still ricky villa

I want to die like my father, peacefully in his sleep, not screaming and terrified, like his passengers.
- Bob Monkhouse

who died unexpectedly

bottlebrush

the_syco wrote: »

If her name is common, the creds would allow people who knew her know that she had died.

It's also done out of respect of who she was.

I find that someone dying unexpectedly would often mean that they weren't in the hospital or nursing home when it happened.

I would hope that everybody regardless of their qualifications would be worthy of respect in death

splinter65

Itssoeasy wrote: »

I've never understood this being put on death notices. People do die suddenly but death at some point isn't unexpected.

I mean if you're in your 70s or 80s then you are expecting to die. I'm sure people want to live as long as they can but when it does happen it's not unexpected.

Yes I had a lot of time to think over the weekend and it was something that came up.

If you’re 83 and you were at bridge on Sunday and your grandchild’s nativity play on Tuesday and played golf on Friday, then doze off in the armchair watching the rugby on TV and don’t wake up, you’ve died unexpectedly.

splinter65

darkdubh wrote: »

Often an euphemism for suicide, especially if it was a quite young person. It's probably the biggest killer in this country for under 40's.

No suicide is now tragically, or suddenly or unexpectedly “at home” with a request for “family flowers only, donations to Pieta House”.

Buford T. Justice XIX

milehip wrote: »

Hay for sale

I think many missed that reference unfortunately.

branie2

A fatal heart attack is an unexpected death

amtc

Not quite the same but an old family friend died earlier this year. My mam and my aunt were at her bedside. Everything had been disconnected so knew she was close to death. However neither of them knew how you actually knew if someone died. Cue hysteria as both them started looking for mirrors to show breath.

everlast75

"Died unexpectedly" will not be the appropriate phrase for this thread.. ..

Oink

For my own obituary I would much prefer them to say “unexpectedly” rather than things like “wonderful surprise” or “karmic justice”, “”Free at last, Free at last, thank God Almighty we are free at last!”

CeilingFly

Its Funeral Director speak.

"In loving care of sisters at xx hospice" or "peacefully" = died of old age

"After short illness" - usually 3-4 weeks. If you knew them, you may feel a little guilt not knowing of the illness

"tragically" - can be anything from suicide, drowning, car accident etc. Words such as pieta house (suicide) or RNLI (drowning) give more info.

"Unexpectedly" - Usually heart attack, stroke or some other illness that was not known / cause of concern prior. Also means that if you knew of the person, you don;t feel gulity not dropping by beforehand if they had been ill.

Good to remember that a funeral director is dealing with an extended family - so wording has to take into account different thoughts / views.

When my mother inlaw passes, boith myself and my wife would like to say "Thankfully, at last"

(yep, I have a MIL from hell)

razorblunt

I always thought "died unexpectedly" should be kept for a some Franciscan Monk who was found having ceased to live surrounded with hos and blow.

[Deleted User]

I've informed my next of kin, that regardless of the circumstances of my demise, this is what is to be on my obituary:

markflynn101, died roaring.

valoren

"died reluctantly"

Akrasia

RayM wrote: »

Exactl

Who pressed the post reply button???

I suspect foul play!

Akrasia

bottlebrush wrote: »

I would hope that everybody regardless of their qualifications would be worthy of respect in death

This is why politicians get state funerals, while poor people get a 'paupers funeral'

Akrasia

splinter65 wrote: »

If you’re 83 and you were at bridge on Sunday and your grandchild’s nativity play on Tuesday and played golf on Friday, then doze off in the armchair watching the rugby on TV and don’t wake up, you’ve died unexpectedly.

Inconsiderate of a grandparent to die at christmas time. Puts a downer on the whole year, and the kids don't even get the day off school to go the funeral.

PeterParker957

CeilingFly wrote: »

Its Funeral Director speak.

"In loving care of sisters at xx hospice" or "peacefully" = died of old age

"After short illness" - usually 3-4 weeks. If you knew them, you may feel a little guilt not knowing of the illness

"tragically" - can be anything from suicide, drowning, car accident etc. Words such as pieta house (suicide) or RNLI (drowning) give more info.

"Unexpectedly" - Usually heart attack, stroke or some other illness that was not known / cause of concern prior. Also means that if you knew of the person, you don;t feel gulity not dropping by beforehand if they had been ill.

Good to remember that a funeral director is dealing with an extended family - so wording has to take into account different thoughts / views.

When my mother inlaw passes, boith myself and my wife would like to say "Thankfully, at last" (yep, I have a MIL from hell)

My dad actually asked the local paper could he put "what took sp long you God ??" when my mother's stepmother died (she hated her too!!) but they said no!!

PeterParker957

Akrasia wrote: »

Inconsiderate of a grandparent to die at christmas time. Puts a downer on the whole year, and the kids don't even get the day off school to go the funeral.

My maternal granddad died on 21 December, we'd already broken up grrr!!!!

WoollyRedHat

I used to think the only way you could die was to be murdered.

_Dara_

screamer wrote: »

We have many words which we use where death is concerned.
Yes death is an eventuality... Doesn't make it any less shocking or unexpected when it happens. Especially if the person was healthy and just died no matter whether they are 9 or 90. It's a shock to their loved ones and saying "oh well sure we all die" is not going to change that.

As a thirty-something terminally-ill person, I really have to put effort into not rolling my eyes when someone trots out “sure, we all die sometime!”. Yeah, that really makes me feel at peace with losing four to five decades of my life. :rolleyes::mad:

Don’t ever say the above or “sure, you could get hit by a bus tomorrow!” to any terminally ill person. They are not comforting.