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The New Charter! (Old charter)

amp · 2005-08-30 18:29:16

Greetings humanoids, I am The Leader and I currently speak through my vassal "amp" as I am currently unable to lower myself into a non energy state. There are times when I can project a holographic image, which has previously taken the form of several cats, Kenneth Williams and Sarky_s. Welcome to this, my beachhead into…

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30-08-2005 7:29pm

#1

amp

Registered Users Posts: 11,446 ✭✭✭✭

Join Date: August 1999

Posts: 11031

Greetings humanoids,

I am The Leader and I currently speak through my vassal "amp" as I am currently unable to lower myself into a non energy state. There are times when I can project a holographic image, which has previously taken the form of several cats, Kenneth Williams and Sarky_s.

Welcome to this, my beachhead into your universe. The Cuckoos Nest [TCN] is a place where the following things are different from other forums on this site you call Boards.ie:

1. Off-topic is key

TCN is the place to go off-topic. If there is one key rule to this forum it's that if a thread goes off-topic then fate has declared this to be destiny or something.

2. Flaming

Creative flaming is encouraged. If people start actually getting upset I may temp ban them. However, non-creative flaming will lead to more extreme measures.

3. No Post Count

The TCN contains no sugar, fat, carbs or post count increases. Post all you like but your post count will remain the same. It will help you lose weight if you also eat less crap and excercise more.

4. The Stupidity clause

This is a handy little clause which allows me to ban anyone I consider too stupid/annoying/twatish to post in TCN. Please note that talking in txtspk is a symtom of extreme stupidity.

5. Thread games

TCN is proud to host many diverse thread games where posters can act like sheep and perform simple tasks like word association or post about the poster before them.

6. Impending enslavement

Rumours about my taking over "amp" completely and enslaving all TCN posters to become drones to infiltrate the Earth are completely unfounded and false. My real motives for controlling this forum are too horrifying for your meagre human brains to understand.

Lots of hardcore love,

The Leader

Previous charter

Version Orange.banana.duck

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#2 30-08-2005 7:46pm
Matthewthebig

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word

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#3 30-08-2005 9:32pm
ANarcho-Munk

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letter

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#4 30-08-2005 9:54pm
kawaii

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corr...

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#5 30-08-2005 10:24pm
kittenkiller

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amp wrote:

Greetings humanoids,

4. The Stupidity clause

This is a handy little clause which allows me to ban anyone I consider to stupid to post in TCN. Please note that talking in txtspk is a symtom of extreme stupidity.

Ha ha, wrong 'to'.
& in the stupidity clause section too!

Please don't ban me.
I looooove you.

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#6 31-08-2005 4:07am
amp

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kittenkiller wrote:

Ha ha, wrong 'to'.
& in the stupidity clause section too!

Please don't ban me.
I looooove you.

Why do you think I left the thread open, my proof reading monkey-girl!?

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#7 31-08-2005 4:56am
Victor

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Posts: 68631

3. excercise -> bike

4. symtom -> disease

6. meagre -> sheepfishmonkeyhead

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#8 31-08-2005 10:26am
Shabadu

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Anyone go to Sleater-Kinney last night? I was at Dinosaur Jr, and wish to compare notes. Hmm? Not relevant you say? I REFER YOU TO POINT ONE OF THE CHARTER, SCUMBEAST!

amp

/me waits patiently for a thread moved to tcn from After Hours for potential threadjack charter referral pour les shíts et giggles

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#9 31-08-2005 7:10pm
amp

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I have discovered multi-vitamins and have litterally had my eyes opened.

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#10 31-08-2005 7:29pm
ANarcho-Munk

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Shabadu wrote:

Anyone go to Sleater-Kinney last night? I was at Dinosaur Jr, and wish to compare notes. Hmm? Not relevant you say? I REFER YOU TO POINT ONE OF THE CHARTER, SCUMBEAST!

amp

/me waits patiently for a thread moved to tcn from After Hours for potential threadjack charter referral pour les shíts et giggles

SHABBADU, please please tell me all about the Dinosaur Jr gig last night! I really wanted to go to that but i couldn't and i was sooooo gutted because of that poxy f*cking age limit! :mad:

Did they play stuff from the first album? It must have been great with Lou back playing bass again!

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#11 31-08-2005 7:37pm
Shabadu

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See linky in sig for details. It was shíte, tbh. Wish we'd gone to Sleater Kinney who RAWK live.

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#12 31-08-2005 7:51pm
ANarcho-Munk

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ahh, no kidding, was it really all that bad?

They are supposed to put up a pretty great live show i thought....

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#13 01-09-2005 11:28am
kittenkiller

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amp wrote:

Why do you think I left the thread open, my proof reading monkey-boy!?

Proof reading monkey-boy???
Oh My God!!!

At last I have a calling!
& apparently a penis!
w00t!

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#14 29-09-2005 12:22pm
[Deleted User]
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I'm going to go ahead and support this charter.

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#15 29-09-2005 1:37pm
Capt'n Midnight

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If you want Off-Topic then try this http://uncyclopedia.org
Can we adopt their site, in the little oprhan Annies sense - or make it our own

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#16 30-09-2005 6:47pm
amp

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kittenkiller wrote:

Proof reading monkey-boy???
Oh My God!!!

At last I have a calling!
& apparently a penis!
w00t!

Dear Kittenkiller,

I apologise for acusing you of having a penis. It is my habit, from years of surfing boards, to assume everyone is in possession of said penis until they prove otherwise. While I often use words like s/he and avoid gender pro-nouns, on that occasion it required me to use one. I have since corrected this and will try my best not to imply you have external genitalia in the future.

Regards,

amp

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#17 30-09-2005 6:52pm
Victor

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amp wrote:

I have since corrected this and will try my best not to imply you have external genitalia in the future.

You mean they cut her bits off!!!!!twenty-one!!

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#18 30-09-2005 7:00pm
amp

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Transexuals are more than welcome in TCN.

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#19 30-09-2005 7:14pm
Capt'n Midnight

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kittenkiller wrote:

At last I have a calling!
& apparently a penis!
w00t!

who's ?

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#20 01-10-2005 11:38am
kittenkiller

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amp wrote:

Dear Kittenkiller,

I apologise for acusing you of having a penis. It is my habit, from years of surfing boards, to assume everyone is in possession of said penis until they prove otherwise. While I often use words like s/he and avoid gender pro-nouns, on that occasion it required me to use one. I have since corrected this and will try my best not to imply you have external genitalia in the future.

Regards,

amp

Well now my post just makes me look odd!
I was quite pleased being able to see how the other half live for a while there.
I never left my bedroom!
Boobs AND a willy, it was a fun couple of weeks!!!!

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#21 01-10-2005 12:41pm
Rhyme

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Capt'n Midnight wrote:

who's ?

*Checks*

Not mine anywho

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#22 01-10-2005 2:20pm
Shabadu

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Rhyme wrote:

*Checks*

Not mine anywho

You know the rules. Pics please.

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#23 01-10-2005 4:58pm
jezza

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Pics of sexy men! Lots and lots of sexy men.

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#24 01-10-2005 5:02pm
jezza

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amp wrote:

Transexuals are more than welcome in TCN.

Well thank God for that....... :relief:

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#25 01-10-2005 5:19pm
supersheep

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Capt'n Midnight wrote:

who's ?

I believe it was mine, it went missing for most of September. I'm glad kittenkiller took good care of it, although I am really not sure that a fourteen millimetre eight-gauge industrial with a zig-zag and spikes was the most suitable choice - I now urinate diagonally and northwesterly. However, I like the new colour scheme - aquamarine is this season's genital colouration of choice.

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#26 02-10-2005 4:05pm
kittenkiller

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I'm glad you approve m'dear!

xoxo

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#27 19-10-2005 12:11am
blu_sonic

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isn't this the best charter on the wole of boards, if the post count was on i'd be a mega poster

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#28 20-10-2005 7:32pm
Stalfos

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Posts not counting is the tool of the Devil

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#29 12-11-2005 5:16am
steveland?

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amp wrote:

Transexuals are more than welcome in TCN.

What about trisexuals*?

* Those who enjoy tricycle intercourse?

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#30 12-11-2005 6:07am
smoke.me.a.kipper

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or omosexuals. those who enjoy sex with washing powders?

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#31 12-11-2005 10:21pm
ANarcho-Munk

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and what about kipposexuals, the one's that rape kippers?

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This discussion has been closed.