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Avoiding sausage fests
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Deleted User wrote: »We what?
WE WHAT?
Can't have been much of a fest if I can't even remember
More of a cabaret than a fest. But it was the best game of chess ever. Probably why you don't remember it. A lot of red lemonade and crisps had been consumed.0 -
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charlietheminxx wrote: »I've wanted a sausage roll all day thanks to this thread...
Nothing wrong with a bit of delayed gratification. So all my girlfriends have assured me 0 -
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Im not getting any younger either so hence im being proactive.
The thing about being proactive in regards to meeting someone, is that you can't really apply it in the same way as you would being proactive to get fit for example, or to improve another area of your life. I've tried it before and it didn't work; I ended up meeting someone when I wasn't looking.
Now I'm not saying taking a proactive approach can't work, but taking up some sort of hobby/activity that you have no interest in to meet someone is not a good idea IMO. You're probably better off sticking to what you enjoy and hope to meet someone that way. I hear of guys joining salsa classes to try and meet women when they have absolutely no interest in dancing. It's mad.H3llR4iser wrote: »There's one thing that is undoubtedly coming out of this thread: women and men enjoy, on a large scale, wildly different hobbies and activities and then complain about a lack of the opposite gender in whatever they do:D.
As for the OP, yes some of the language he used can be defined as immature at best, doesn't show much consideration and the likes; It has however to be said that every time a post about "hi ladies and gentlemen, I am struggling to meet women, what can I do?", the thread almost immediately becomes an original poster bashing fest, invariably descending into "OP couldn't get any girls if it rained them".
Most of the advice given is appalling to say the least; Joining "classes" and "courses" where women are? Do guys seriously think ladies are stupid and don't realize when somebody has zero interest in cooking/pottery/salsa dancing/painting but a lot of interest in their boobs?
I don't know you Lufties, have no way to judge your character or attitude, I can only go by what you say here; And from what I read, you might actually be trying a little too hard for your own good.
Make no mistake, it's good to be proactive; It's just that in my experience, it's really easy to overdo it - which makes a guy undesirable; "Reek of desperation", as some might say. If you join a yoga class just to meet women, that's overdoing it.
You've been at a singles party, and from what I read you actually enjoyed it except for the part where you went home alone. As simple as it is you don't win all the time. Don't let it frustrate you. I'd try again, you are in London which has plenty of opportunities. Wouldn't want to wait for a "singles event" in most Irish cities
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Last but not least, if it's true that the OP put in some derogatory comments it's just as true that there have been quite a bit of remarks along the lines of "guys that do X in/at Y are creeps!". Nobody ever bats an eyelid about it, but it's an unacceptable attitude just like the ice queens comment.
I know such attitude is largely triggered by the "join a class for x to meet women!" ideas and, while I can't possibly understand the predicament, I am aware of the fact that most women are essentially offered c0ck as a side to anything on a daily basis. I agree it is annoying.
Still, it doesn't give the right to stigmatize a guy's behaviour. The man trying to talk to a woman in the gym would probably be there exercising regardless, he's not there just to "creep", and the fact the two of you are doing the same thing points out to some quite obvious common ground. It's perfectly fine not to be interested, it isn't to label somebody because he just tried. If it was, nobody would talk to anybody in any setting.
In the end, if everyone from both sides relaxed a little bit about the whole "meeting women/men" thing, it'd be a better place.
Excellent post, particularly the parts in bold which is so typical of AH.0 -
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