LETS ALL LAUGH AT PEOPLE WITH DEPRESSION!!

jammstarr · 27-02-2012 7:22pm

ItsAWindUp wrote: »

Whaaaaaaat:eek:I can't afford that

I was working at the time thankfully however it was still a chunk of wages. If possible look into the drug payment scheme or a medical card.

mysteries1984 · 27-02-2012 7:29pm

ItsAWindUp wrote: »

Whaaaaaaat:eek:I can't afford that

jammstarr wrote: »

I was working at the time thankfully however it was still a chunk of wages. If possible look into the drug payment scheme or a medical card.

+1 to this. Mine cost me €1.89 each, and I take 3 a day.

Also +1 to talking to your parents about it, best thing I ever did.

roseybear · 28-02-2012 12:15am

ItsAWindUp wrote: »

Is there any way that I could go on anti-depressants without my parents finding out?

chances are your parents already know something is up. i know in my case, they knew something was wrong long before i even realised it. they were the ones who brought me to the doc last summer to get a prescritption for antidepressants. i was 20 at the time, and although i have always been an extremely independent person this was one time that i was glad they were involved in my business. it just makes things easier when they do know as they can be aware of stressful times and keep an extra eye on you

guitarzero · 28-02-2012 1:29am

Just curious as to what some folks make of these observations about psychiatry.

http://www.indymedia.ie/article/60719?userlanguage=ga&save_prefs=true

Im hoping this wont spiral into some dispute, see no reason why it should, but have a read through and see if any of it strikes a chord in anyway. Personally, I have no experience with psychiatry but I'm due an appointment soon enough. It all seems pretty murky.

I had once thought psychiatry was based on some form of emotional interaction akin to psychotherapy but it seems its pretty much like a drug merchant.

Also, I remember once reading that people who are left handed are more prone to depression, if I can find the link I'll post it. 1 in 10 people are thought to be left handed yet the ratio was said to be greater on part of left handers in the context of depression and addiction.

mysteries1984 · 28-02-2012 1:41am

guitarzero wrote: »

Just curious as to what some folks make of these observations about psychiatry.

http://www.indymedia.ie/article/60719?userlanguage=ga&save_prefs=true

Im hoping this wont spiral into some dispute, see no reason why it should, but have a read through and see if any of it strikes a chord in anyway. Personally, I have no experience with psychiatry but I'm due an appointment soon enough. It all seems pretty murky.

I had once thought psychiatry was based on some form of emotional interaction akin to psychotherapy but it seems its pretty much like a drug merchant.

Also, I remember once reading that people who are left handed are more prone to depression, if I can find the link I'll post it. 1 in 10 people are thought to be left handed yet the ratio was said to be greater on part of left handers in the context of depression and addiction.

I mostly skimmed it - but numbers 1 and 12 stood out to me as bizarre and blatantly untrue, with no proof posted there to back such statements up. It strikes me as nonsense that's potentially far more damaging than it claims psychiatrists to be.

K-9 · 28-02-2012 2:14am

guitarzero wrote: »

Just curious as to what some folks make of these observations about psychiatry.

http://www.indymedia.ie/article/60719?userlanguage=ga&save_prefs=true

Im hoping this wont spiral into some dispute, see no reason why it should, but have a read through and see if any of it strikes a chord in anyway. Personally, I have no experience with psychiatry but I'm due an appointment soon enough. It all seems pretty murky.

I had once thought psychiatry was based on some form of emotional interaction akin to psychotherapy but it seems its pretty much like a drug merchant.

Also, I remember once reading that people who are left handed are more prone to depression, if I can find the link I'll post it. 1 in 10 people are thought to be left handed yet the ratio was said to be greater on part of left handers in the context of depression and addiction.

While there probably is some truth buried in there somewhere, it kind of gets lost amid all the hyperbole, it's indymedia after all! I'd call it hypocritical as that article could potentially be very dangerous for somebody taking it too seriously!

purplestuff · 29-02-2012 2:38am

Depression is exactly as you have described it.It's a sense of nothingness.I've had it for a couple of years now and the best description I've heard , bar your own, is from Stephen Fry.It was in his documentary on Manic Depression.''Everything bad that happens to you is because you are a complete and utter ****''.It's not necessarily true but it's how it can feel sometimes.

nesf · 29-02-2012 4:09am

K-9 wrote: »

While there probably is some truth buried in there somewhere, it kind of gets lost amid all the hyperbole, it's indymedia after all! I'd call it hypocritical as that article could potentially be very dangerous for somebody taking it too seriously!

This.

Mucky.Bucky · 01-03-2012 1:05am

The feelings of shame, guilt, disguist and fear were very strong today. Sorrow and regret too.

Princess Peach · 01-03-2012 1:36am

Captain Graphite wrote: »

I've shared my story here before, and since then things have mostly been a bit better. But recently I've made the mortal error of allowing myself time to think. I'm currently in China, teaching English until the end of May. I came here to have an adventure, to get away from home, to give myself somewhere new to try and shake old demons out. And for the first couple of weeks, when everything was new and hectic, it worked. My mind was free of personal problems. Instead I focussed on getting along with Chinese public transport and being taken to fancy restaurants every few nights by gracious Chinese hosts. This should be the opportunity of a lifetime for me. I reckon a lot of people would love to be where I am right now. I should be giddy with excitement constantly.

But I can't feeling really underwhelmed and lonely right now. Other than two other foreign ESL teachers, there's no-one here for me to talk to really. But I know if I went back home, it'd pretty much just be my family I'd be talking to. Going back home would mean going back to mindnumbing days of boredom, unemployment and loneliness. At least here, the loneliness part is all I have to deal with. So there's no point in me going back home. But the novelty of teaching has worn off after a couple of weeks and, after 18 classes a week, I'm usually just left with a very sore throat and a vague sense of futility.

When I do get back home, I'm starting a Masters in Nottingham in September. And already I can't help thinking to myself; what if I'm not able for it? I screwed up in college a lot of the time and I can't help feeling I'll screw up this time too. I should be looking forward to having another great opportunity but, eight months in advance, I'm already just pretty terrified.

Going back to the loneliness thing, I know there's no chance of me having any sort of lovelife over here in China (the whole "gheyness" thing is non-existent where I am) and it probably won't be any different when I get back home. I love being in a relationship but my previous two both ended disastrously. I don't talk to either of my exes anymore, and that really bugs me. I think it says a lot about me that, two years in a row, I get dumped right before my birthday by guys who, only a little while before, told me that they loved me. And it feels really unhealthy that I have yet to have an ex that I've stayed friends with after. It feels like I'm just completely disposable, or something. Good for a few months and then thrown away. And even though I long for a relationship that works out (or even one that ends well), I'm now terrified of even the prospect of going on a date with anyone. If what's already happened to me twice happens a third time......there's no way I can deal with that kind of shít.

I'm only 22 years old but already it feels like I have unhealthy amounts of regret. There are so many things I wish I could change about my life and the way things have gone. I know that the past is the past, and that there's nothing I can do about it. But no matter how many times I tell myself that, my mind won't let me stop pondering the "what-ifs". And I've done the whole counselling thing, psychotherapy thing, psychiatric thing, anti-depressants thing (still on them at the moment)....and every time it feels like I'm resolving things and moving in the right direction, something comes along to just set me back again.

I'm not even looking for advice or sympathy any more, really. I just need to vent, and online is pretty much the only place I can do it right now. And a lot of this stuff I've already posted about before, so anyone who knows me that reads it would be forgiven for rolling their eyes and calling me a broken record. Maybe someone shouting in my face, telling me to cop on and get the fúck over myself is what I need.

I really thought I'd moved on from the whole "needing to see the bad in everything" mindset, and 2012 started off on such a high note; getting to go to China, getting accepted for a Masters......I should not be feeling so down right now. It just doesn't make sense. Nothing about depression does, I guess.

I just moved to Canada 2 months ago. Everyone is really nice but hard to kinda break through the barrier to good friends you know? So gets pretty lonely sometimes.

Feeling exactly the same as you. Everything was so exciting at first and then I kinda hit a plateau. Did you learn about the stages of culture shock in your ESL training? I did a course last year and its one of the things we learned about. Here's a link, lots of other sites on it too.

http://www.kwintessential.co.uk/cultural-services/articles/cultureshock-stages.html

You are probably just in stage 2. I had this all too the last time I moved to the states. Don't beat yourself up about it or think its you slipping back into depression. Hopefully it's just a bit of homesickness and will pass

You should be so proud of yourself going on an adventure and getting accepted to your masters. You've taken control of your life and are making positive changes. Hope you feel better soon and start enjoying yourself again.

stupidusername · 01-03-2012 1:46am

I'm realising more and more that it's anxiety I have, rather than depression. depression induced by anxiety I suppose. but much about a depression diagnosis is just me I think.

jammstarr · 01-03-2012 1:54am

stupidusername wrote: »

I'm realising more and more that it's anxiety I have, rather than depression. depression induced by anxiety I suppose. but much about a depression diagnosis is just me I think.

I used to think the same but they're after flip flopping so many times now I can't tell anymore.

K-9 · 01-03-2012 2:01am

stupidusername wrote: »

I'm realising more and more that it's anxiety I have, rather than depression. depression induced by anxiety I suppose. but much about a depression diagnosis is just me I think.

I'd concentrate on the anxiety part if you think depression is the symptom. Read up on it as much as you can, try and address it and see if it makes any difference.

I know, all seems very simple when its put like that, and it isn't!

stupidusername · 01-03-2012 2:08am

K-9 wrote: »

I'd concentrate on the anxiety part if you think depression is the symptom. Read up on it as much as you can, try and address it and see if it makes any difference.

I know, all seems very simple when its put like that, and it isn't!

i'm going to CBT for it. after analysing my thoughts for tonight I really don't see how I'll ever get past it. i'll never have a normal ****ing relationship!

K-9 · 01-03-2012 6:33am

DeVore wrote: »

It's incredibly easy to feel alone in a foreign country. No language , cant read or write, different culture etc... Trust me I've been on the road in Asia now for two weeks and it's a challenge but I have a buddy with me which makes it a bit easier... College will be a lot easier I think, cos you will have plenty of people who are potential friends. You are 22, I envy you. It gets sooooo much better.

Sherlock Season 2 is out on DVD here!

Young lad loved the first series and thought the cliffhanger was great, as I said, if you think that was good, wait till you see Season 2! Still thinks the movies are better so I think Series 2 will knock that out of him!

Anybody any good ideas for evening classes, general activities, not involving the pub or drink?

nesf · 01-03-2012 7:24am

K-9 wrote: »

Anybody any good ideas for evening classes, general activities, not involving the pub or drink?

Take up Go! Free to play online on the KGS or IGS servers. It'll keep you busy forever and there's loads of free learning tools here:

http://senseis.xmp.net/

and

http://goproblems.com/

That's my current hobby. I'm still crap at it though.

Night_Shade · 01-03-2012 8:12am

hi, this thread is a great read.

personally, i've had some major issues over the last 6 months that have really affected my life but i've no idea whether or no i'm actually **depressed** or if it's just a massive mental disorder that leads to symptoms of depression (i assume this is possible?)

i know myself that i've a huge mental disorder. it's a body image disorder. i know i have it, but haven't had the courage to go and see someone over it. basically i've been avoiding everyone i know these past 6 months bar a handful of people (mainly immediate family). and by avoiding, i mean none of them have actually seen me in 6 months. i never go down town anymore, i don't exercise and stay at home all day on the computer. i sleep at odd times, often wake up in the middle of the night. the odd time i do leave the house (only when i absolutely have to) i am extraordinarily anxious. i feel like i can't let anyone see me. i've also withdrawn from previous sporting activities i was engaged in. all of them.

i have hope, most of the time. i know what to do to fix it (at least temporarily). a strict healthy diet and exercise for about 6 weeks and i'd be back to normal, happy to see people and get out and about again. sometimes i might get through a day or two of sticking to my goals but always, i end up failing. the motivation just isn't strong enough. and then i suffer from feelings of guilt and occasionally have the odd thought of suicide when i'm at my lowest (although, i could never, ever, see myself going through with it, it's more of a selfish gesture than a serious thought). and then i get back to planning the healthy diet and exercise routine, get through a day or two and the same thing happens. rinse and repeat. has been happening for the guts of 6 months now.

i've only recently thought that i may be depressed. i hadn't done so before because i always thought depression was something that happens relatively naturally to people, they become sad for no reason whereas i know what the root of my problems are. the more i think about it, the more confused i become about it all.

Mucky.Bucky · 01-03-2012 1:21pm

Selena Creamy Bather wrote: »

Apoligising is something I want to do because I was in the wrong but I am kinda in two minds about it. He drove me into despair with his lies and actions and had absolutely no remorse for me or my feelings. Which actually started off the depressive episode. He made me feel so unbelievably low and worthless. There wasn't even so much as even an apology from him. Almost as if to say: if you feel that way, it's nothing to do with me.

maybe write him a letter saying sorry ? Then never post it

[/QUOTE]

I wrote him an apology. It didn't help one bit. Apologising is something I so badly want to do but I'm only going to make a fool of myself sending it because he was completely inconsiderate of me with empty promises crushing me which led to the depression which led to me being a b1tch and an absolutely batsh1t crazy one. He may be likely to dismiss it too.

Will ponder it for a few more days.

Wattle · 01-03-2012 3:26pm

Night_Shade wrote: »

hi, this thread is a great read.

personally, i've had some major issues over the last 6 months that have really affected my life but i've no idea whether or no i'm actually **depressed** or if it's just a massive mental disorder that leads to symptoms of depression (i assume this is possible?)

i know myself that i've a huge mental disorder. it's a body image disorder. i know i have it, but haven't had the courage to go and see someone over it. basically i've been avoiding everyone i know these past 6 months bar a handful of people (mainly immediate family). and by avoiding, i mean none of them have actually seen me in 6 months. i never go down town anymore, i don't exercise and stay at home all day on the computer. i sleep at odd times, often wake up in the middle of the night. the odd time i do leave the house (only when i absolutely have to) i am extraordinarily anxious. i feel like i can't let anyone see me. i've also withdrawn from previous sporting activities i was engaged in. all of them.

i have hope, most of the time. i know what to do to fix it (at least temporarily). a strict healthy diet and exercise for about 6 weeks and i'd be back to normal, happy to see people and get out and about again. sometimes i might get through a day or two of sticking to my goals but always, i end up failing. the motivation just isn't strong enough. and then i suffer from feelings of guilt and occasionally have the odd thought of suicide when i'm at my lowest (although, i could never, ever, see myself going through with it, it's more of a selfish gesture than a serious thought). and then i get back to planning the healthy diet and exercise routine, get through a day or two and the same thing happens. rinse and repeat. has been happening for the guts of 6 months now.

i've only recently thought that i may be depressed. i hadn't done so before because i always thought depression was something that happens relatively naturally to people, they become sad for no reason whereas i know what the root of my problems are. the more i think about it, the more confused i become about it all.

I would try and break the cycle of reclusiveness if I were you diet or no diet. Being by ourselves when we're ill just makes us more self obsessed and less able to communicate with people. Maybe you shouldn't try and do this alone? Maybe you should talk to a counsellor or family member? From reading your message it sounds like you may be setting yourself too high of a level of perfection. If you give in just once you end up feeling like a miserable failure and you are back to square one. This is unhealthy thinking. Try and talk to someone with a sympathetic listening ear. One of the irony's of depression is that we need people most when we least feel like talking to them.

SerialComplaint · 01-03-2012 4:43pm

Night_Shade wrote: »

hi, this thread is a great read.

personally, i've had some major issues over the last 6 months that have really affected my life but i've no idea whether or no i'm actually **depressed** or if it's just a massive mental disorder that leads to symptoms of depression (i assume this is possible?)

i know myself that i've a huge mental disorder. it's a body image disorder. i know i have it, but haven't had the courage to go and see someone over it. basically i've been avoiding everyone i know these past 6 months bar a handful of people (mainly immediate family). and by avoiding, i mean none of them have actually seen me in 6 months. i never go down town anymore, i don't exercise and stay at home all day on the computer. i sleep at odd times, often wake up in the middle of the night. the odd time i do leave the house (only when i absolutely have to) i am extraordinarily anxious. i feel like i can't let anyone see me. i've also withdrawn from previous sporting activities i was engaged in. all of them.

Congrats on posting here. This could be your first step on a long road to recovery.

My amateur opinion is that you need to move from trying to 'fix' your perceived problem (with weight presumably) as the first step. Lots of us are overweight - me included. Most of us don't let it rule our lives.

You might be able to start addressing this issue yourself, or with help from family or friends, or by getting professional help. But either way, don't keep falling into the trap of thinking that the first thing you have to deal with is diet. In reality, the first thing you have to deal with is how you are letting your body image issue control your life.

fozzle · 12-03-2012 10:02am

The retail park I work in has apparently gone into receivership this morning, I'm freaking out, not sure how well I can cope with this :-( I can feel that black dog pushing up against me and if this turns badly I don't think I'll fight him off. I'm not good when I'm missing structure; money aside I need something to force me out of bed in the mornings.
Sorry for ranting just panicing.

sheesh · 12-03-2012 12:00pm

fozzle wrote: »

The retail park I work in has apparently gone into receivership this morning, I'm freaking out, not sure how well I can cope with this :-( I can feel that black dog pushing up against me and if this turns badly I don't think I'll fight him off. I'm not good when I'm missing structure; money aside I need something to force me out of bed in the mornings.
Sorry for ranting just panicing.

well if the retail park still has shops it probably will keep going regardless. you should be fine.

Mucky.Bucky · 12-03-2012 12:39pm

fozzle wrote: »

The retail park I work in has apparently gone into receivership this morning, I'm freaking out, not sure how well I can cope with this :-( I can feel that black dog pushing up against me and if this turns badly I don't think I'll fight him off. I'm not good when I'm missing structure; money aside I need something to force me out of bed in the mornings.
Sorry for ranting just panicing.

Many places and large establishments like hotels and supermarkets have gone into receivership and still remain open. So I think you could be ok but I know what you mean. Without my job I think I would have slept for 5 to 6 months. My job kept me busy and outside of work my mind was wandering and racing.

I was involved with an asshole who made me feel so worthless which brought about more negative feelings. I was like a dog chasing its tail looking for answers. It was a vicious spiral. The more I thought about it, the more I felt down. The more I felt down, the more I thought about it. I took his sh1t and treatment personally then transmitted all that back at him being a nasty b1tch with nasty messages which made feel worse.

I still haven't gone to the doctor for a diagnosis but I think what I went through was depression. Doing a lot better now with many good days with some days being bleak.

K-9 · 12-03-2012 5:45pm

fozzle wrote: »

The retail park I work in has apparently gone into receivership this morning, I'm freaking out, not sure how well I can cope with this :-( I can feel that black dog pushing up against me and if this turns badly I don't think I'll fight him off. I'm not good when I'm missing structure; money aside I need something to force me out of bed in the mornings.
Sorry for ranting just panicing.

2 retail parks in Letterkenny were taken over last week, probably half the hotels, pubs and retail units are to some extent in receivership or NAMA. As long as businesses are paying rent in retail parks receivers will keep the business going as a going concern until hopefully a buyer can be found.

Mucky.Bucky · 15-03-2012 12:20am

Monday, Tuesday and today were fantastic for me. Didn't do anything out of the ordinary but I was able to let go most of the situation that led to being depressed go. I say most because I'm still beating myself up for my outgoing unhealthy behaviour and how I'm going to be perceived by others.

guitarzero · 17-03-2012 1:11am

Anyone know much about 5-htp? Apparently it helps depression, only came across some info on it now.

neemish · 27-03-2012 3:59pm

Hi all,
Just wondering if anyone here has come off anti depressants after a long time and did it work out for you. Curious to see if there is a life after them!

howsyourtusk · 27-03-2012 4:06pm

I suffer from depression. I recently made the decision not to hide it from the majority of my friends. Up until 6 months ago only a few people knew about it. It's such a weight to bear, having to make excuses all the time, lie, pretend. It's almost as bad as the feeling itself.

Coming clean has made things easier, I feel relief. The steps I've taken to sort things out have lost me one friend and one partner in that short time and that was extremely tough but I realise I have to do what's right for me and they have to do what's right for them. I love the both of them and I hope they're both happy

I still feel like crap on a regular basis but now I know I can talk to so many more people about it and than in itself is a relief. Phew :P

talkinyite · 27-03-2012 5:01pm

I'm starting to realise now that I've been depressed for awhile, that I've been masking/dealing with pain by drinking and smoking copious amounts of booze and weed and that I've distanced myself from mates somewhat. I'm on a bit of a detox the past week or so after making a eejit out of myself on the session almost overdosing on pills (which I never do) and I think I'm thinking a bit clearer now than I have been recently, although I just feel numb. I never talk to anyone about feelings because I've never seen the point in it and don't really trust people, but I might give it a go.

KyussBishop · 27-03-2012 5:27pm

Still (slowly) coming to the realization that I've been depressed for a long while now, with that loaded atop social phobia that's been afflicting me most of my teen/adult life.

Of the two, I'd put isolating cases of social phobia as one of the worst curses that can be inflicted upon anyone, but I'm (very slowly) making progress with it still.

howsyourtusk · 27-03-2012 6:40pm

talkinyite wrote: »

I'm starting to realise now that I've been depressed for awhile, that I've been masking/dealing with pain by drinking and smoking copious amounts of booze and weed and that I've distanced myself from mates somewhat. I'm on a bit of a detox the past week or so after making a eejit out of myself on the session almost overdosing on pills (which I never do) and I think I'm thinking a bit clearer now than I have been recently, although I just feel numb. I never talk to anyone about feelings because I've never seen the point in it and don't really trust people, but I might give it a go.

For years the only person I'd talk to was my Mam but I'd go through phases were I wouldn't and during that time I'd have no one to talk to. Simply put, after 11 years of suffering from it I know now that talking is the only cure, your own head is a dangerous place and getting those thoughts out are the best thing. Just try it, bet you'll feel relief! And if anyone judges you they don't care too much about you!

DeVore · 27-03-2012 9:23pm

Working on counselling as promised. So far it's been both challenging (in quite a rough manner at times) and kinda fun in an odd sort of way. To tell you the truth, after a wildly turbulent start I've never felt this much at peace.
As I wrote on twitter today "Lots of people like me. I've decided to be one of them."

Good luck to us all...

wonderfullife · 28-03-2012 12:51am

I just want to share my own thoughts on this. I have done so in other parts of the site but i suppose this thread has a wider audience.

I suffer from depression, panic disorder and a slight personality disorder. Most people who know me in some capacity would react with "what? go away outta that!!!". That's a perfectly natural response. I'll get to that in a minute.

I like to equate depression to a "temporary wheelchair for your mind". If you lost temporary use of both your legs and had to use a wheelchair, a lot of things would go through your head: The frustration at not being able to walk like you used to, the frustration at the length of time it is taking to regain the use of your legs, a change in how you are perceived and received by those around you and an all-round longing wish for things to go back to the way they used to be.

Depression is no different in a lot of respects. The key difference is this temporary wheelchair is not visible. People definitely respond better to the visual and seen versus the invisible and unseen. This is human nature. An actual wheelchair user will receive almost unilateral sympathy, empathy and support. Their "plight" is unmissable. Someone suffering cancer, like my father went through, get universal support and empathy, nobody wants to see anybody suffer.

The reason we respond better to the visual is that we are by nature problem solvers. If we see something is broken, we try to fix it. People suffering from depression don't have the "luxury" (and i chose this word carefully but respectfully) of having a visual telltale sign. Sure some people might look down, but everyone gets down now and then. Sometimes they might look "fine" and everyone looks fine now and then. The lack of a visual and physical stimulus (like a wheelchair or a bald head from chemotherapy) means it goes unseen. By proxy; whereas sympathy/empathy/support is projected TOWARDS visual sufferance, people with unseen sufferance, like depression, must project themselves to SEEK sympathy/empathy/support.

Personally i find a lot of the problem re: support structures from family/friends comes to down to misguided good intentions. I've always felt no matter how much i am struggling and hurting, it's infinitely worse on those dear to me. As a sufferer i am at least in some control of my illness and outcome. It may be difficult but i have things i can physically do to try make things "better". My mother, brothers and friends don't have that luxury. A lot of the time, misguided good intentions come in this sort of form: friends saying "ah come out on saturday night stop being a wet blanket!!", brothers joking "ah sure you're a lazy so-and-so get up outta that bed and do something!!" or mother saying "pure lazy is what you are get up and motivate yourself".

For all that the advice may miss the point, their intentions are so pure in heart and spirit. They can't physically make me do things and i'm sure they all know deep down it's more than laziness, it's more than lethargy. But the frustration in trying to help those with depression often means those around us suffer too. I can only speak for myself but that fact doesn't go unnoticed and, if anything, slightly heightens the feeling of being no good to anyone.

Recently i took a lot of positive steps. I have a Home Care Nurse who visits once a week, she's lovely and whilst our chats for the most part are just chats, it does help. My task for this week, wait for it, was to shower and shave before my appointment with my Psychologist thursday! That might sound beyond trivial to a lot of you but basic human function at times becomes an ordeal. I've also noticed since i took the positive steps, there has been a positive reaction from friends and family. Maybe it's a coincidence with the sun being out past few days but i notice a lot of them are perkier. maybe it's no coincidence.

In truth, i joined Boards originally for 1 reason - to try post on a depression related thread over the footballer Gary Speed. My doctor joked with me last week when asked what i do and i said i post a lot on The Walking Dead forum. And he said oh right whats that, and i said it's a post-apocalyptic show about the end of the world and survival. I laughed and said i must be a psyhcologists dream!!! depressed and watching the world being eaten alive by zombies!!

To sum up a long read i have been through my own personal hell and back for roughly 18 months. I am not going to go into all the negatives but trust me i've experienced a lot from homelessness to wanting to be somewhere else. And what i realised from all that, is that i love life so much!! and want to try my hardest to regain the one thing i've lost through all this....... ME. My username is wonderfulllife and i read this line every day, it's a quote from the film:

"Remember no man is a failure who has friends"- It's A Wonderful Life (1946)

Smidge · 28-03-2012 1:07am

guitarzero wrote: »

Anyone know much about 5-htp? Apparently it helps depression, only came across some info on it now.

Hi there afaik this product contains the compound "melatonin" which in some studies has shown to help with depression, SAD, and even bi-polar

Smidge · 28-03-2012 1:16am

I was surprised when I saw this thread as the topic of depression has been on my mind all day.
A very close friend of mine(and a wonderful human being!) suffers from depression. She got a letter in the post on Thursday to inform her that she will no longer receive Disability alllowance. Her doctor is more than well aware of how much difficulty she has but said there was nothing he could do to help as IHO he had seen a huge amount of the patients he treats with depression just simple being "cut off".
My heart breaks for her, this is just another worry that she cannot bear

wonderfullife · 28-03-2012 1:19am

mishkalucy wrote: »

I was surprised when I saw this thread as the topic of depression has been on my mind all day.
A very close friend of mine(and a wonderful human being!) suffers from depression. She got a letter in the post on Thursday to inform her that she will no longer receive Disability alllowance. Her doctor is more than well aware of how much difficulty she has but said there was nothing he could do to help as IHO he had seen a huge amount of the patients he treats with depression just simple being "cut off".
My heart breaks for her, this is just another worry that she cannot bear

I found myself in an identical position but there is no need to panic. The community welfare officer can pay weekly Supplementary Welfare indefinitely with the doctors letters etc. This means she will not be placed under the pressure of jobseekers allowance where she has to show she is looking for work. The welfare system gets slated in here but pushing herself back to work without dealing with the problem can be a massive ordeal and setback.

shuvly · 28-03-2012 1:23am

It's sunny = me happy! Had great 2 weeks off work, went to barcelona, then went on drives round the beautiful county where I live, all on my own. Have just had two gorgeous days on the beach a minute from my home...work is hell but the real life is great.

Deus Ex Machina · 28-03-2012 1:38am

The sun, or the scareball as us nightshift guys call it, makes everything worse. It's like a giant eye staring down at me, judging me for all my sins and the sins of my father. It mocks me.

KyussBishop · 28-03-2012 1:45am

mishkalucy wrote: »

She got a letter in the post on Thursday to inform her that she will no longer receive Disability alllowance. Her doctor is more than well aware of how much difficulty she has but said there was nothing he could do to help as IHO he had seen a huge amount of the patients he treats with depression just simple being "cut off".

Hmm, is this common at the moment? People with serious diagnosable mental health problems being cut off from disability?

If that's the case that's absolutely inexcusable; to hear peoples issues are not being taken seriously (and at a time when they may need financial help the most), especially when this country is already so poor on support for mental health.

Smidge · 28-03-2012 1:47am

wonderfullife wrote: »

I found myself in an identical position but there is no need to panic. The community welfare officer can pay weekly Supplementary Welfare indefinitely with the doctors letters etc. This means she will not be placed under the pressure of jobseekers allowance where she has to show she is looking for work. The welfare system gets slated in here but pushing herself back to work without dealing with the problem can be a massive ordeal and setback.

The letter she got said she could go to the cwo but that she may only receive payment after she had registered for jobseekers yada yada.
She always worked(would put anyone to shame!) until this depression hit her and the thought that any further stress put on her would make things worse for her, I hate it. Jobseekers is so not an option for her.

wonderfullife · 28-03-2012 1:48am

KyussBishop wrote: »

Hmm, is this common at the moment? People with serious diagnosable mental health problems being cut off from disability?

If that's the case that's absolutely inexcusable; to hear peoples issues are not being taken seriously (and at a time when they may need financial help the most), especially when this country is already so poor on support for mental health.

Yes unfortunately. For example, in my case, i have it from my GP, a psychologist and psychiatrist all saying i'm clinically depressed with panic disorder and a slight personality disorder and they cut me off and told me to seek jobseekers allowance. My doctor had a fit over it, he was raging, said it would be the worst thing i could do right now to try push back into employment without addressing my illnesses

wonderfullife · 28-03-2012 1:49am

mishkalucy wrote: »

The letter she got said she could go to the cwo but that she may only receive payment after she had registered for jobseekers yada yada.
She always worked(would put anyone to shame!) until this depression hit her and the thought that any further stress put on her would make things worse for her, I hate it. Jobseekers is so not an option for her.

Dont worry i didnt have to apply for jobseekers despite being told similar, the CWO's are for the most part pretty good as usually they work in the same offices as the mental health teams. She'll be fine just get down to the CWO with a doctors letter.

KyussBishop · 28-03-2012 1:56am

wonderfullife wrote: »

Yes unfortunately. For example, in my case, i have it from my GP, a psychologist and psychiatrist all saying i'm clinically depressed with panic disorder and a slight personality disorder and they cut me off and told me to seek jobseekers allowance. My doctor had a fit over it, he was raging, said it would be the worst thing i could do right now to try push back into employment without addressing my illnesses

:mad: Christ that kind of carry on is enraging, can totally see why your doctor would be angry as well. Any idea if this kind of stuff has been going on long? (how long ago was that?)

Maybe would be worth writing a letter with your doctor and sending it off to your local TD's (and having others in the same situation do that); it's screwing over people that are potentially the most vulnerable and in need.

Smidge · 28-03-2012 1:56am

KyussBishop wrote: »

Hmm, is this common at the moment? People with serious diagnosable mental health problems being cut off from disability?

If that's the case that's absolutely inexcusable; to hear peoples issues are not being taken seriously (and at a time when they may need financial help the most), especially when this country is already so poor on support for mental health.

It is true. As wonderfullife will atest to. We are random strangers on the internet and have the same info. My friend jumped through allof the hoops,went to every appointment for the SW when she was "called for". Has multiple docs, psych etc reports and just gets the letter in the post. I am fully aware of how awful the mental health services are in this country as we had a suicide in the family some years ago

KyussBishop · 28-03-2012 1:59am

mishkalucy wrote: »

It is true. As wonderfullife will atest to. We are random strangers on the internet and have the same info. My friend jumped through allof the hoops,went to every appointment for the SW when she was "called for". Has multiple docs, psych etc reports and just gets the letter in the post. I am fully aware of how awful the mental health services are in this country as we had a suicide in the family some years ago

Ya I personally find it unbelievable, when we are being taxed to fúck as well (and still only at the start of all that); if that's going on on such a wide scale it really needs immediate attention.

Smidge · 28-03-2012 2:04am

It's very sad indeed how this country views mental health, including neurological and psychiatric disorders. When I look back before my friend developed this you would never have said this was in the post for her. Scary thought that this horrid thing can strike anyone at any time in their life. No-one is immune and there is no vaccine

wonderfullife · 28-03-2012 2:07am

KyussBishop wrote: »

:mad: Christ that kind of carry on is enraging, can totally see why your doctor would be angry as well. Any idea if this kind of stuff has been going on long? (how long ago was that?)

Maybe would be worth writing a letter with your doctor and sending it off to your local TD's (and having others in the same situation do that); it's screwing over people that are potentially the most vulnerable and in need.

The thing i found , and maybe others too, is that with my illness i find it so much of an ordeal to deal with the social welfare people and the concept of going to a TD or writing letters is tough for me. I find it hard enough to get out of bed and shower, havent been out of bed in a few days now. It's just a sad state of affairs that in 2012 we're still woefully neglectful of mental health and the old approach of having to go to your TD to get anything sorted still prevails.

Smidge · 28-03-2012 2:11am

@ wonderfulllife
I don't think she could even CONTEMPLATE dealing with a TD.
She's stuck in a place that she can't get out of

KyussBishop · 28-03-2012 2:11am

wonderfullife wrote: »

The thing i found , and maybe others too, is that with my illness i find it so much of an ordeal to deal with the social welfare people and the concept of going to a TD or writing letters is tough for me. I find it hard enough to get out of bed and shower, havent been out of bed in a few days now. It's just a sad state of affairs that in 2012 we're still woefully neglectful of mental health and the old approach of having to go to your TD to get anything sorted still prevails.

Yes true indeed, just hard to think what might have an impact and reverse that (not on an individual basis, but the whole policy); needs media and political attention to reverse.

Smidge · 28-03-2012 2:16am

does anyone mind if I just throw this out there????
How many people have you heard of recently who have committed suicide?
I have to be honest I am sick to the back teeth as ever few weeks I hear of another suicide.
Does further pressure on people with mental health issues help?
Not in my opinion

Why are we not hearing about this?
Because if the public really knew what was going on and knew how many people were taking their own lives I would hope there would be an outcry

LETS ALL LAUGH AT PEOPLE WITH DEPRESSION!!

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