The least stressful job...

Stinicker · 14-12-2012 9:35pm

unkel wrote: »

Boards moderator. No stress at all, €45k and free coke & hookers.

BANNED

Stinicker · 14-12-2012 9:43pm

mikemac1 wrote: »

Night porter

Decent pay, around 12 euro an hour. Good for a student

Just about 2 hours of cleaning to do in a shift, that's all

Sleep if you want if it's mid week and quiet. Just forward the phone to the mobile and put the door buzzer on vibrate and on your belt

Drunk girls chatting you up as they come back drunk from the nightclub

Big fry breakfast from the chef in the morning

And best of all, no managers to bother you!

Having did that job I can tell you it is nothing like you describe.

3ndahalfof6 · 14-12-2012 9:48pm

Dipping my toe in tepid water to make sure it is tepid, then induce popweed to keep me on track.

upstairs for coffee · 14-12-2012 9:49pm

Stinicker wrote: »

Having did that job I can tell you it is nothing like you describe.

What was it like?

Crann na Beatha · 14-12-2012 9:54pm

This post has been deleted.

bigron2109 · 14-12-2012 10:01pm

A Tea Taster

seven_eleven · 14-12-2012 10:04pm

Toll booth operator.

Stinicker · 14-12-2012 10:13pm

upstairs for coffee wrote: »

What was it like?

At least four hours of cleaning, resetting and restocking things, keeping the bar opened until silly O'Clock, taking out the rubbish, lots of things really. Having to vacuum several hundred square metres of carpet each night was the final straw and I gave it up after several weeks.

Darwin · 14-12-2012 10:18pm

KyussBishop wrote: »

Also boring as fúck sometimes, so it's a double edged sword that; can lead to burnout, if you don't keep it interesting. Still, pretty nice if you can do it self-employed, and be your own boss.

If you are in game development, ever hear of crunch time? Can go on forever in some studios, definitely not stress free.

14-12-2012 10:21pm

Lad Of Banter wrote: »

Luas pilot

I knew someone would say this. :pac:

Driving trams or trains isn't exactly easy. Especially with the Luas in the city centre, where jaywalkers provide an extra challenge. You have to keep full concentration at all times. You need to know your route inside out - the location of every station, speed limit (permanent or temporary), level crossing, accommodation crossing, you name it.

Would still love to do it though.

DonkeyStyle \o/ · 14-12-2012 10:23pm

Work at the change counter in an arcade, they're the most listless people I've ever seen.

The_Gatsby · 14-12-2012 10:25pm

Teacher? They do **** all!

14-12-2012 10:31pm

Lukebray wrote: »

Teacher? They do **** all!

Hope you're joking. I'm so tired I could collapse right now.

sfwcork · 14-12-2012 10:39pm

susan boyles gynaecologist

Calibos · 14-12-2012 10:41pm

Karsini wrote: »

I knew someone would say this. :pac:

Driving trams or trains isn't exactly easy. Especially with the Luas in the city centre, where jaywalkers provide an extra challenge. You have to keep full concentration at all times. You need to know your route inside out - the location of every station, speed limit (permanent or temporary), level crossing, accommodation crossing, you name it.

Would still love to do it though.

Know your route inside out???

That's a lot of left and right turns to remember!!

Satts · 14-12-2012 10:42pm

Karsini wrote: »

Driving trams or trains isn't exactly easy. Especially with the Luas in the city centre, where jaywalkers provide an extra challenge. You have to keep full concentration at all times. You need to know your route inside out - the location of every station, speed limit (permanent or temporary), level crossing, accommodation crossing, you name it.

I thought the train passed through every station.

KyussBishop · 14-12-2012 10:44pm

Darwin wrote: »

If you are in game development, ever hear of crunch time? Can go on forever in some studios, definitely not stress free.

Indeed, which is the area I am in, though thankfully I'm not ever in a position where I have to go into crunch mode

(not yet at least)

Mr Benevolent · 14-12-2012 10:45pm

Mine.

It's taken.

retalivity · 14-12-2012 10:48pm

fluffer

14-12-2012 10:49pm

Calibos wrote: »

Know your route inside out???

That's a lot of left and right turns to remember!!

I don't mean that. You have to know where all the speed limits are. Unlike in a car, you can't just slow down when you see the sign up ahead. In some cases you need to begin braking anything up a mile before the limit. You could have a situation where a 100mph limit becomes 60 due to a tight curve - if you forget it then you're off the rails.

I know that on Irish Rail, failing to stop at a scheduled station is treated as severely as running a red light. In either case, you're immediately suspended and re-assessed.

Accommodation crossings are another big problem. These are used by farmers for crossing their animals across the tracks. Many farmers don't bother closing the gates, with the result that stray cattle could end up on the tracks. Over time you learn which crossings are problematic and know whether to slow down, stop, blast the horn or whatever.

On the Luas, you also have the added responsibility of setting the track points yourself. There's no signalman to do it for you.

franktheplank · 14-12-2012 10:59pm

FionnMcCool87 wrote: »

Ryan Tubridy's dietitian

Ryan Tubridy's talent manager.

justaskin likeyakno · 14-12-2012 11:19pm

Check out the check out staff thread, scan, beep, money, change, next, scan, beep, money, change, next....repeat, repeat, repeat...

I had a job that I hated, I left and found a job that was good, near home, hours I could manage, nice co workers......what,s the catch.....

The boss is a complete fooking wankker, he hates, hates, hates, his job and takes it out on us.

The moral of the story being, a job is only as stressful or as stress free as you make it, because I was going to leave this job but actually learnt to deal with spanner man instead.

Calibos · 14-12-2012 11:38pm

Karsini wrote: »

I don't mean that............

I know;)

TOMP · 14-12-2012 11:49pm

The guy from KPMG who acts as 'independent observer' for the weekly Lotto draw. I want that job.

uberalles · 14-12-2012 11:56pm

From another thread .....

http://www.independent.ie/national-n...s-3325806.html

Originally Posted by :
TWO men working for a repossession company were told to strip and get into a pen with a wild boar after a confrontation with a farmer, a court has been told.

"He said to us that we had met the devil and he told me he would take my head off and eat it. He said if we were willing to strip we could walk down the road naked," said Mr Tighe.

The witness, who told the court he is receiving treatment for post-traumatic stress, said Mr Connaughton instructed one of the farm workers to bring out a boar and "fire her up". He said that the animal was prodded and became more agitated.

He added that Mr Connaughton asked them which of them was man enough to get into the pen with the wild boar. He added that the boar would show them what happens to inmates in prison.

Mr Tighe said they continued to plead to be allowed to leave. He said they could if they got on their knees and recited the 'Our Father', which they did.
Keeping in mind these are just accusations at this time... but fcukin' hell!! :pac:

I have to say its probably one of the worst jobs you could have working for repossesion company

mike65 · 15-12-2012 12:13am

Capt'n Midnight wrote: »

Don't you just hate when a good raconteur gets interrupted by cricket and you never get to hear how the story ends

I'd do it for the cakes alone!

Thoie · 15-12-2012 12:25am

How about office cleaning? Quiet, indoor work, usually not too many people to deal with. Keeps you physically active, and as long as you actually clean stuff, relatively little hassle.

Most office toilets are in better nick than somewhere like a nightclub, and the rest of the job is mostly vacuuming and dusting.

Or lollipop lady - though that's more of a part time job, with presumably part time wages.

shuyin1 · 15-12-2012 12:25am

TOMP wrote: »

The guy from KPMG who acts as 'independent observer' for the weekly Lotto draw. I want that job.

That's his break, he goes back to work afterwards!!

smileyj1987 · 15-12-2012 12:26am

A life on Benefits , free healthcare and housing what more could you want !

mike65 · 15-12-2012 12:29am

Film classifier. Sit in a room with copies of the latest releases and scribble the odd note. Cake and coffee thrown in.

Shinaynay · 15-12-2012 12:38am

look, reality is, unless youre running your own playdough factory that has no deadlines or targets, youre going to experience stress in any job.

Call Me Jimmy · 15-12-2012 12:40am

Shinaynay wrote: »

look, reality is, unless youre running your own playdough factory that has no deadlines or targets, youre going to experience stress in any job.

Thanks for playdough factory, I hadn't thought of that before. Might be a winner.

The Dublin Whale · 15-12-2012 12:40am

Greenkeeper, out in the fresh air all day, would keep you fit so no need to go to a gym in that job, you could keep a naggin of whiskey on you and sip from it during the colder weather

15-12-2012 6:56am

Lukebray wrote: »

Teacher? They do **** all!

Teaching isn't stressful? Say what you want about teaching but only a full blown retard would think it's stress-free.

Irish Guitarist · 15-12-2012 8:05am

Food critic. Eat food for free and write about it tasted.

mike65 · 15-12-2012 1:11pm

You think food critic was low stress and yet the number of bitchy even hostile encounters between critic, cook, owners and some of the public suggests otherwise.

Capt'n Midnight · 15-12-2012 2:32pm

mike65 wrote: »

Film classifier. Sit in a room with copies of the latest releases and scribble the odd note. Cake and coffee thrown in.

Ah but imagine it back in the old days before there was internet or even videos and lots of books were banned, and you were allowed to cut out and keep all the really good bits.

Living the dream

redandwhite · 15-12-2012 2:43pm

Deleted User wrote: »

Teaching isn't stressful? Say what you want about teaching but only a full blown retard would think it's stress-free.

You can't blame him for his lack of intelligence.

I blame the teachers.

Shryke · 15-12-2012 3:45pm

smileyj1987 wrote: »

A life on Benefits , free healthcare and housing what more could you want !

The definition of "job".

humbert · 15-12-2012 6:00pm

Deleted User wrote: »

Teaching isn't stressful? Say what you want about teaching but only a full blown retard would think it's stress-free.

Or someone who's been to school and sat through class after class as teachers mumbled apathetically through textbooks hardly even bothering to acknowledge the students in front of them.

Rodin · 15-12-2012 6:05pm

Arsenal footballer

poeticseraphim · 15-12-2012 7:16pm

Yoga Instructor

Pilates Instructor

Fitness Instructor (exercise relieves stress:-)

Massage therapist???

jimd2 · 15-12-2012 7:40pm

Captain Chaos wrote: »

Any job in Government. Sure you don't even have to turn up half the time and still get paid even when you leave you still get paid more than 95% of the population until you die. You can't get arrested for anything either. Great job.

So you were one of those that was sufficiently forward thinking during the boom to apply and get one of the government jobs going replacing those that deserted those jobs for higher pay, bonuses etc? If not did you apply for any of these incredible jobs? There were a fair few going at the time.

If not then why not?

Hippies! · 15-12-2012 8:37pm

How about here?

Lawlesz · 15-12-2012 9:36pm

The Dublin Whale wrote: »

Greenkeeper, out in the fresh air all day, would keep you fit so no need to go to a gym in that job, you could keep a naggin of whiskey on you and sip from it during the colder weather

I am a Greenkeeper, and I can assure you it can get as stressful as most other jobs. Out in the fresh air and the physical work are perks though.