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Lets all be anxious/depressed together.
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Call Me Jimmy wrote: »Thanks both you guys. Hersheys i know you have had it a lot worse than me and I appreciate the solidarity!
dfonlep, solid advice, it's just I lost the hair around my temples and won't be in a relationship again because baldness is death to me. If i wasn't goin balding I'd be out right now!
Don't sweat it brother! I went thin on top at 25, and just shaved my head. I mach-3 it every day
Ladies love it! 0 -
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Don't sweat it brother! I went thin on top at 25, and just shaved my head. I mach-3 it every day Ladies love it!
Yea I keep it shaved tight. But does it not make you feel (and you sound comfortable enough with it at this stage so I hope you don't mind) like your 'stock' went down. I dunno, I feel like anyone who sees me will just think 'well he must be bringing something else to the deal because he is bald'. I just can't resolve it in my mind. It is like a death, no? You had to become reborn to get back out there?0 -
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Call Me Jimmy wrote: »... I lost the hair around my temples and won't be in a relationship again because baldness is death to me.Call Me Jimmy wrote: »It's just an image thing Hersheys. **** it I'm gonna say it for the first time in my life, before I started balding I was a knockout, I looked ****ing great. Looks are so superficial and all that but I was a good looking kid. Just to balance things: I'm deep too. My isolation has lead me to follow every thread of thought imaginable to its completion but I still want to love and be loved as we all do and it's just ****ing terminal losing looks you once had in a very short period of time. Ye look at the mirror and you, yes you are an old man. sorry guys I just... I'm upset. I know you's are too, and I'd help that if I could.
CMJ, I think this is my first post on this thread, which I came to recently from the AH Laugh thread. I have trimmed your posts above to leave the thing I want to reply to. I accept that nothing I say here is going to result in you having an instant insight, but I am going to say it anyway.Call Me Jimmy wrote: »... does it not make you feel like your 'stock' went down. I dunno, I feel like anyone who sees me will just think 'well he must be bringing something else to the deal because he is bald'. I just can't resolve it in my mind. It is like a death, no? You had to become reborn to get back out there?
Growing older is a fact of life. For a man, that may include losing some of the hair on the head, or that hair going grey, or growing unwanted hair in/on your ears and in/on your nose. Regarding the ear/nose hair, what do you do? You pluck it or trim it, or if you couldn't care less, you let it grow. We all know men who are apparently oblivious to extra ear/nose hair. We don't usually want to emulate them though. The same goes for men who never trim their hair or shave/trim their beard. You probably shave regularly. Or if you have a beard, you keep it trimmed. The same goes for the hair on your head. Keep it trimmed - it can be long, short, very short, very very short, or shaved.
What do other people think when they see you with a shaved head or with a very short haircut? If they think anything at all, it is probably something like this: "That guy looks cool. He is obviously comfortable with his appearance. I wish I could be as comfortable as seems to be." That is if they think anything at all. Because the simple fact is that people in general are not looking at you. If they are, they are probably not thinking what you think they are thinking (phew, too much thinking there!)
Just out of interest, do you think that a woman who has had a mastectomy should be of the opinion that her life is over? I don't think you would, and rightly so. Not that losing some of the hair on your head is anywhere as life-changing as losing a part of your body that conventional society might consider to be an essential facet of being a woman.
Anyway, recently I told a guy I know (a big Game of Thrones fan) that Wilko Johnson (a famous guitarist and latterly an actor who plays the part of Ser Ilyn Paine, the mute executioner in game of Thrones) had been diagnosed with pancreatic cancer. His reply to me was "Maybe you could go for the role". Now Wilko in current real life is a shaven-headed scary looking dude. I took that as a compliment, instead of thinking that he meant that I was a baldy, frowny fooker.
So, get with the program, man! Feel cool about yourself, and you will be cool. Don't focus on the image in the mirror, because that's what it is - an image, and a distorted one at that. Do your eyes look old? I don't think so.Not your ornery onager
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Call Me Jimmy wrote: »Yea I keep it shaved tight. But does it not make you feel (and you sound comfortable enough with it at this stage so I hope you don't mind) like your 'stock' went down. I dunno, I feel like anyone who sees me will just think 'well he must be bringing something else to the deal because he is bald'. I just can't resolve it in my mind. It is like a death, no? You had to become reborn to get back out there?
Just gotta take it in your stride brother! There's a lot worse things could happen to you than going thin. Many women find it appealing. You just need to accept that it's now a part of who you are, and the sooner you do that - the sooner you'll become comfortable with it. 0 -
Esel I appreciate the long post, thanks for taking the time. I suppose everyone goes through a denial/acceptance phase, I stubbornly thought I'd be able to kill myself before having to go through it, but it appears I am a mere mortal!Woeful night, really restless. Exhausted now & can't deal with the thoughts of smiling at my mother all day long.
I'm kinda the same hersheys. Going into the bright lights of a big shop to get her flowers and and a lotto ticket was not something I needed this morning, very anxiety provoking but I just thought of it as submerging under water. Out the door, head underwater, pop back up for air when I get back. And now she will appreciate the thought an all that.
I don't think she'll be expecting you to smile all day. Just think of it as company, try to see her with fresh eyes.Just gotta take it in your stride brother! There's a lot worse things could happen to you than going thin. Many women find it appealing. You just need to accept that it's now a part of who you are, and the sooner you do that - the sooner you'll become comfortable with it.
Yes this is the next step man, it's just I think what they find appealing might be the tight cut rather than the fact that hair is missing, but they are strange creatures so I suppose anything's possible!0 -
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