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Approaching a Girl in the Street

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Comments

  • Closed Accounts Posts: 2,540 ✭✭✭Giselle


    guitarzero wrote: »
    I know! Wait, erm, whats wrong with sex??

    Absolutely nothing.

    Theres a lot wrong with feeling as though you're being predated upon though. Ask any girl who's been cornered at closing time by a guy who sees you as a walking orifice (or collection thereof).


  • Registered Users Posts: 25 tis a fine line


    Phat Cat wrote: »
    Well then it's about time that women started to take the initiative then isn't it?

    I dunno, i've taken the initiative a few times in my life and it has never worked, i got the feeling that the men in question were turned off as soon as they realised i was interested?

    Only want what you can't have syndrome?

    That could be an issue with approaching women in the street also...

    I suppose to do it successfully, a man would have to be confident, not cocky, friendly, and a little intriguing, to instill curiosity in a woman?


  • Registered Users Posts: 25 tis a fine line


    Galvasean wrote: »
    *glances over at the online dating thread*

    Oh we have to bother alright...

    Maybe i just don't get it so... mind you i have been out of practice


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 371 ✭✭Catxscotch


    I went to visit a sex shop once, just for a nosy, but the owner had gone to run an errand and left a sign saying "back in 5 mins", so i decided to wait. There was a bus stop nearby so I acted as if I was just waiting for a bus. Some guy comes over and says Hi, I seen you from across the street and wanted to say hello, luckily Im waiting for the same bus". I was really chuffed but have a boyfriend, and told him so. He said that was fine and smiled back. Just then the bus arrives and he gets on. He sees I don't get on and starts saying he not a stalker and I shouldn't be so rude! I didn't know what to do so just walked off. I bet he thought I was a stuck up bitch.. Ah well!!


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 51,342 ✭✭✭✭That_Guy


    Catxscotch wrote: »
    I went to visit a sex shop once, just for a nosy,

    What did you buy? :pac:


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 30,746 ✭✭✭✭Galvasean


    What did you buy? :pac:

    A 'nosy' obviously.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 9,463 ✭✭✭KTRIC


    Galvasean wrote: »
    A 'nosy' obviously.

    Ah, is that what the young ladies call them these days :pac:


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 6,561 ✭✭✭GrumPy


    Catxscotch wrote: »
    I bet he thought I was a stuck up bitch.. Ah well!!


    Turns out you were just plain old horny! :D


  • Registered Users Posts: 409 ✭✭lecker Hendl


    I wouldn't approach an irish woman in the street for the time of day never mind a date.

    The foreigners however...


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  • Closed Accounts Posts: 9,925 ✭✭✭Otis Driftwood


    I wouldn't approach an irish woman in the street for the time of day never mind a date.

    The foreigners however...

    no_country_for_old_men_tommy_lee_jones.jpg

    Dont start that crap in here please.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 30,746 ✭✭✭✭Galvasean


    I wouldn't approach an irish woman in the street for the time of day never mind a date.

    The foreigners however...

    Ah here, are people still hung up on that Polish wimmin v Irish wimmin buzz?

    edit: oops, just saw Ottis' post :o


  • Registered Users Posts: 409 ✭✭lecker Hendl


    It's not really crap. Girls that are not irish are more approachable and accepting of this behaviour. Please don't be so insensitive.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,425 ✭✭✭guitarzero


    Giselle wrote: »
    Absolutely nothing.

    Theres a lot wrong with feeling as though you're being predated upon though. Ask any girl who's been cornered at closing time by a guy who sees you as a walking orifice (or collection thereof).

    Predated? Not sure what you mean there.

    Cornered, who mentioned anything about being cornered?

    A walking orifice, implying that he just wants sex which brings me back to...

    ...whats wrong with sex?


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 9,925 ✭✭✭Otis Driftwood


    It's not really crap. Girls that are not irish are more approachable and accepting of this behaviour. Please don't be so insensitive.

    Because you have approached every foreign woman and every Irish woman in the country Im sure?

    Ive told you once not to post that crap in here.Dont do it again.


  • Registered Users Posts: 409 ✭✭lecker Hendl


    It's not crap. You are right. I have not approached every irish and every foreign girl in the street, but are surveys done by approaching every person? No. Ban me if you must but your argument is just as bad. I stayed on the thread topic. I gave my opinion on approaching girls. I don't approach irish girls. I have no doubt that there are lovely ones out there.


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  • Closed Accounts Posts: 2,540 ✭✭✭Giselle


    guitarzero wrote: »

    A walking orifice, implying that he just wants sex which brings me back to...

    ...whats wrong with sex?


    Nothing. As I've said.

    Theres very much wrong with being treated as available gynecology instead of a human being.

    Being preyed upon as JUST such is a distinctly uncomfortable experience.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,425 ✭✭✭guitarzero


    Giselle wrote: »
    Nothing. As I've said.

    Theres very much wrong with being treated as available gynecology instead of a human being.

    Being preyed upon as JUST such is a distinctly uncomfortable experience.

    You seem to say that you feel like a victim by men showing interest in you, that you are being preyed upon, I dont get it. You're certainly not being clear anyway.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,713 ✭✭✭Cianan2


    I did this last week, and gave the girl my number to leave the ball in her court from there! She was delighted and looked forward to meeting me again. Nearly 7 days later and i have yet to hear from her :( I guess I am just paranoid that I gave her the wrong number, maybe she is playing some sort of game!


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 2,207 ✭✭✭jaffacakesyum


    Cianan2 wrote: »
    I did this last week, and gave the girl my number to leave the ball in her court from there! She was delighted and looked forward to meeting me again. Nearly 7 days later and i have yet to hear from her :( I guess I am just paranoid that I gave her the wrong number, maybe she is playing some sort of game!

    This somebody you just met on the street? You could've given her the wrong number, she could've lost it...don't go crazy trying to figure out why. The most likely answer is she was just being polite when you gave her your number, and wasn't really interested in meeting you again.

    Absolutely fair play to you for approaching a girl and giving her your number. If you haven't heard from her in 7 days though don't drive yourself mad trying to figure out why. Onwards and upwards. :)


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 2,353 ✭✭✭Galway K9


    It's not crap. You are right. I have not approached every irish and every foreign girl in the street, but are surveys done by approaching every person? No. Ban me if you must but your argument is just as bad. I stayed on the thread topic. I gave my opinion on approaching girls. I don't approach irish girls. I have no doubt that there are lovely ones out there.

    Whoever said a Freedom of speech exists?:D


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  • Registered Users Posts: 70 ✭✭Yo! MTV SUCKS


    Im just gunna put this here

    http://www.travelbumshow.com/travelbum/

    its basically a few short episodes following around a photographer around new york and what he gets up to,an absolute fantastic watch and would reccomend to anyone with a genuine interest in this type of shtuff


  • Registered Users Posts: 18 pauge2007


    Pembily wrote: »
    Happened me with a guy in a shop I had been in a few times. I said yes and we had a fun few weeks :)

    Would love to try going up to a girl sometime and trying to wooh her!


  • Registered Users Posts: 18 pauge2007


    Im just gunna put this here

    http://www.travelbumshow.com/travelbum/

    its basically a few short episodes following around a photographer around new york and what he gets up to,an absolute fantastic watch and would reccomend to anyone with a genuine interest in this type of shtuff

    Thats really good show!


  • Registered Users Posts: 33 wordisbond


    I've done this before and still do sometimes. Wanted to try it and the first time I did it took me 2 hours to work up the courage. World didn't end. Totally worth it. I say to anybody thinking about it go for it.

    I can haz advice though...

    If your from a small town/college this kinda thing might come back and bite ya in the ass and has done to me before. You will inevitably run into them again. Can be awkward. Do it in the big citay!

    I think stopping people walking in the street is a bit weird. Sitting beside somebody or approaching somebody who is chilling and not walking to a destination is much more comfortable and less weird I would say.

    Be honest. Don't ask for directions/the time etc.

    1.Excuse me (Smile) 2. Genuine compliment 3. My name's ____ 4. Stick out hand

    Doesn't really matter what happens after this because you win at life!


  • Registered Users Posts: 5,933 ✭✭✭Logical Fallacy


    It's not crap. You are right. I have not approached every irish and every foreign girl in the street, but are surveys done by approaching every person? No. Ban me if you must but your argument is just as bad. I stayed on the thread topic. I gave my opinion on approaching girls. I don't approach irish girls. I have no doubt that there are lovely ones out there.

    It really is. If Irish girls had the massive issue with being approached/chatted up and generally came on to that the odd sad bastard on this forum portrays then we would have a declining population.


  • Registered Users Posts: 204 ✭✭wivy


    what if it was the other way around...
    would you be wierded out if a girl approached you on a street? its something i wouldnt mind giving a go..


  • Administrators Posts: 54,090 Admin ✭✭✭✭✭awec


    This post has been deleted.


  • Registered Users Posts: 8,247 ✭✭✭Maguined


    wivy wrote: »
    what if it was the other way around...
    would you be wierded out if a girl approached you on a street? its something i wouldnt mind giving a go..

    Wouldn't be weirded out at all, there would be initial shock as it is something that has never happened but I would be really impressed with a woman for doing it, there are always nerves involved with such an approach so the confidence someone has to have to get over the nerves and just go for it is a good start.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 2,484 ✭✭✭The Snipe


    I'm really interested in giving this a try, been reading the thread over the last two days. I want to check what ratio of people accept and shoot down straight away.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 102 ✭✭dtipp


    Many years ago I was out jogging with a friend of mine (two fellas) and we passed a bus stop and we discussed the gorgeous girl that was among those standing there. We weren't far from the spot where we turn around and jog back, so we passed the bus stop again about 10-15 minutes later and she was still there, my friend stopped, chatted to her for a few minutes, asked her out, she said yes, and they went out for a few weeks.

    I would never have had the balls to do that.


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  • Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 3,144 ✭✭✭Scanlas The 2nd


    The Snipe wrote: »
    I'm really interested in giving this a try, been reading the thread over the last two days. I want to check what ratio of people accept and shoot down straight away.

    I think it's best not to think of the chances of you being rejected or not. Just accept the facts, each and every time you approach you do not know what will happen and can't control what will happen. Be ok with that. No matter what happens you are still the same as before. The world goes and and no one cares, it's forgotten about.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 2,484 ✭✭✭The Snipe


    I think it's best not to think of the chances of you being rejected or not. Just accept the facts, each and every time you approach you do not know what will happen and can't control what will happen. Be ok with that. No matter what happens you are still the same as before. The world goes and and no one cares, it's forgotten about.


    True, but as mentioned earlier in the thread by someone, it'd be more of an experiment to see how people react to people randomly entering their comfort zone.


  • Registered Users Posts: 1,295 ✭✭✭Joe10000


    Approach the guy/girl, smile, be nice and see what happens, if they can't be nice back the problem is theirs.


  • Registered Users Posts: 82 ✭✭SEEMagazine


    I've a million of these stories, but all from when I was a few lbs lighter, and a LOT more hair.

    Asked out a stunner from Centra on Oliver Plunkett once (she said yes)... Nice lass and we stayed friends for ages after (no idea where she lives these days, or even what her surname is anymore).

    There was a girl from the Music Dept who used appear where I was quite a lot, very hot, but the notion that I was being shyly stalked was unsettling, even though I would have said yes. Funny really.

    I've no idea what the norm for this is in Croatia, though I wouldn't be interested these days. Of course, if you like the black haired big brown eyed type I'd say you're spoilt for choice here.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 3,328 ✭✭✭karaokeman


    if you like the black haired big brown eyed type I'd say you're spoilt for choice here.

    Karaokeman does like his brunettes ;).

    But yeah I also intend to start a habit of talking to anyone I see sitting by themselves on a bus/train or on the street.

    I probably won't stop people walking on the street as that is understandably weird and would knock my confidence.

    Probably best to just see how it goes first, no thinking about acceptance/rejection until after, the more you think about what will happen thats beyond your control the more daunting it becomes.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,830 ✭✭✭shawnee


    I've a million of these stories, but all from when I was a few lbs lighter, and a LOT more hair.

    Asked out a stunner from Centra on Oliver Plunkett once (she said yes)... Nice lass and we stayed friends for ages after (no idea where she lives these days, or even what her surname is anymore).

    There was a girl from the Music Dept who used appear where I was quite a lot, very hot, but the notion that I was being shyly stalked was unsettling, even though I would have said yes. Funny really.

    I've no idea what the norm for this is in Croatia, though I wouldn't be interested these days. Of course, if you like the black haired big brown eyed type I'd say you're spoilt for choice here.

    Know of a friend who went on holidays to Croatia, when he arrived at his destination, he asked the first lady he saw for directions to his accomodation.... they are now married and living in Croatia ten years after.
    Moral of the story !!:p


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 8,199 ✭✭✭G-Money


    Of course, if you like the black haired big brown eyed type I'd say you're spoilt for choice here.

    I'm moving to Croatia.
    shawnee wrote: »
    Know of a friend who went on holidays to Croatia, when he arrived at his destination, he asked the first lady he saw for directions to his accomodation.... they are now married and living in Croatia ten years after.
    Moral of the story !!:p

    Is it sad that the first thing I thought of was, did he really need directions or was he just using that as an excuse to get talking to her and he really knew exactly where he was going all along.


  • Registered Users Posts: 82 ✭✭SEEMagazine


    No, directions here are awkward... The Slavic languages bear zero relationship to that which we're more familiar with. We all probably have a smattering of French, German, etc, and would be able to follow street names etc, should we need to get directions.

    Here... Every street name changes when you describe it as a destination, from when it's used in an address... Plus there are 4-5 different endings which are used, from -ćeva, čeva, oka, ova, xyz, and abc. It can get confusing.

    As for that guy who married and settled here... He wouldn't have been an architect in his former life perchance? Into his Irish dancing?


  • Registered Users Posts: 31 flaccidmember


    That_Guy wrote: »
    Walking up the main street in Ashbourne and this gorgeous girl walked by. I passed her but I stopped and ran back to her and said, "excuse me. I know this is completely out of the blue but you're very pretty and was wondering if you fancied getting some lunch".

    "Eh no thanks you weirdo" was her reply.

    Fúck it. Least I tried.

    You should've then said 'You actually look like a stray cat with the mange that has been neglected all its life, so I thought I'd be charitable and try and say something nice to you. Now that I've found out that you're just a castrating, narrow-minded, issue-ridden yokel who likes to insult people that pay them compliments, I take it all back'


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  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 51,342 ✭✭✭✭That_Guy


    You should've then said 'You actually look like a stray cat with the mange that has been neglected all its life, so I thought I'd be charitable and try and say something nice to you. Now that I've found out that you're just a castrating, narrow-minded, issue-ridden yokel who likes to insult people that pay them compliments, I take it all back'

    Jaysus. :eek:


  • Registered Users Posts: 218 ✭✭Ammsy500


    From what I can remember I have only been approached by a guy once on the street. I was sitting waiting for the dart in Bray while reading some trash mag like heat when a guy sat down next to me on the bench I was sitting on. He first said something like 'Nice weather isnt it?' Me looking up from my mag said ye it is a lovely day and then after some more small talk he asks me 'would you like to go out sometime?' This was my reaction :eek: and then this :o. I couldnt believe it as this never happens to me or anyone I really know. Its the Irish way as this was something like out of the movies. I was very flattered but just taken a back so just said something like 'em I dont really know you so I dont think so' while nervously laughing. Ye I was young and just so scarlet and probably weary of strangers :D What I would do now for a cute guy to approach me while getting a coffee or waiting for the bus :P


  • Registered Users Posts: 118 ✭✭purplepapillon


    I used to work in a supermarket (not in the street, but not in a boozy situation either) in town and two anecdotes stand out:

    Both guys were regular customers with whom I had good rapport.

    1. One chatted to me about his dinner that night (ready meal) and aked me what time I was off at and did I go to the cinema often, or ever go after work. He left a ticket at my till. It was all very awkward as he didn't say anything about it. I hope to this day it was a mistake, as I didn't go. (I know, I'm a horrible cow - but he didn't ask me at all and I think confidence - faked or otherwise - is quite important)

    2. Another guy used to come in a lot and we chatted a lot. He was very intriguing and made me laugh. He asked me out, very casually, for a coffee sometime. The next time he was in, we organised the "sometime" at my suggestion that we do so.

    A bit of both taking the initiative works best.
    Phat Cat wrote: »
    Well then it's about time that women started to take the initiative then isn't it?

    Most of my female friends would never dream of doing this, yet constantly complain that they are single. One particular instance when we were in a pub, my friend was making this complaint (again) whilst also saying how a guy at the next table had caught her eye. There is NO point in thinking what "could" be - jump in and do something! So, she went to the loo and upon her return I asked the guy his name, introduced her and left them there. She was so shocked I had left her there I think, but they dated for a while after that. So success IMO!

    Some girls can be very freaked out by alleged "stalkers". I think the American attitude, as mentioned before in this thread, is the way to go. It is normal to want to date, to go out with, have sex with others. Catholic Ireland is not "dead and gone" at all at all. Personally, I would take it as a compliment if a guy approached me in the street.

    Go for it :D


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,271 ✭✭✭annascott


    It happened to me years ago in London when I was in my early twenties. I was 'picked up' twice by men who stopped me on the street. I had a few dates with both of them (not at the same time) to restaurants, bars etc. Nothing lasted, both were considerably older than me and I always had a slight creepy feeling that prevented me from being on my own with them. I always made sure that we were in a public place and never let them into the house. One was American and the other had been quite famous in the 70's (!)

    Oh, perhaps I should mention that one was driving a Porche and the other a Jaguar XJS. The cars made a difference. :p


  • Registered Users Posts: 30 Happyturtle00


    When I lived in the US, I saw this happen alot. You'd meet someone on the street and go for a drink/coffee. It happened regularly to friends of mine too, and we just accepted it as the norm. It didn't come across as creepy because loads of people did it.

    Haven't really seen it happen here in Ireland much, but I certainly wouldn't complain or think "he's a creep" if it did. Irish lads have a nice cheekiness to them that they should use to their advantage. I know if a guy could make me laugh, I'd be willing to hear him out.

    Having read the thread, I'd nearly consider doing it myself. Just need to figure out what to say....


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 25,243 ✭✭✭✭Jesus Wept


    annascott wrote: »
    It happened to me years ago in London when I was in my early twenties. I was 'picked up' twice by men who stopped me on the street. I had a few dates with both of them (not at the same time) to restaurants, bars etc. Nothing lasted, both were considerably older than me and I always had a slight creepy feeling that prevented me from being on my own with them. I always made sure that we were in a public place and never let them into the house. One was American and the other had been quite famous in the 70's (!)

    Oh, perhaps I should mention that one was driving a Porche and the other a Jaguar XJS. The cars made a difference. :p

    If you had a 'creepy feeling' why did you go out with them more than once or at all?


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  • Closed Accounts Posts: 3,265 ✭✭✭SugarHigh


    If you had a 'creepy feeling' why did you go out with them more than once or at all?
    |
    |
    \/
    Oh, perhaps I should mention that one was driving a Porche and the other a Jaguar XJS. The cars made a difference.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,877 ✭✭✭stripysocks85


    If someone thought I was beautiful enough, to approach me on the street & tell me so, I would be very flattered :) Hasn't happened yet! Don't expect it to either!


  • Registered Users Posts: 204 ✭✭wivy


    Went up to a guy the other night and start chatting to him..
    Was slightly awks when the gf came over... :L ah well!


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