what is wrong with me!

Graciefacey wrote: »

I am 5 foot 3, 9 st 10 & train with a personal trainer once a week. I am small build but have built quite a bit of muscle, dress size 8. I lead a healthy diet & exercise regime 80percent of the time but the other 20% I am disgusted with. I just feel 'soft' lately, I work in a very busy stressful job & bread and chocolate are my comforts! I didn't bother packing lunch today as I said I'd grab a salad, however I found myself with a chicken fillet roll. Why do I keep jeopardizing myself I am absolutely disgusted

You had a chicken fillet roll for lunch. You didn't smother a puppy so maybe take it easy on the self recriminations.

Question: why do you feel bread and chocolate are your comforts? Just have a think about genuinely answering that.

And you're not the first person to opt for convenience. Maybe consider preparing lunches in advance to make lunch decisions easier and less likely to end in you feeling so bad about them.

It's a long game. Some days we make the wrong choices but if they are far outweighed by healthy choices then you're on the right track. And unless you're eating something messed up, there's nothing that should leave you feeling disgusted with yourself.

Graciefacey wrote: »

Thanks for that! I think!

Look its all in the planning,as you say you ate the chicken fillet roll because you didn't have the food prepared.

If you are aiming for weight loss btw 1 day a week with a trainer will do nothing, 3 minimum (Not necessarily with a trainer)

Fail to prepare prepare to fail. You don't have to ruin your life getting in shape just eat below your maintenance calories during the week,exercise tues-thurs and don't go mental during the weekend and you will lose weight.

if you cant put in the effort to make the meals and exercise then you don't really want it.

You just need to do it spot on for 2-3 weeks and one you see results then you'll want to continue.

Looking at a few of your other posts your problem seems to be motivation and not just relating to your diet, I'm not being funny but you need to want to change and people telling you what you want to hear from behind a screen wont help, you need to want to.

I think you'd be well advised to go to a Cognitive Behavioural Therapist.

If you stay stuck in this cycle of starving then binging and then thinking dodging sweets is the answer, you might keep falling back into the cycle.

There's something deeper at the root of it that you need to address. Just my two cents.

Graciefacey wrote: »

I would have to disagree, my self esteem is very high I just have no willpower!

I never mentioned self esteem and it's not the only reason for CBT.

It's understanding behaviours and resolving the root of a problem since you mentioned a disorder yourself.

It's just advice offered to help get you out of a cycle

theboy1 wrote: »

OP, I would suggest cutting gluten out of your diet, it sounds like you may me gluten intolerant.

Its nothing to do with gluten intolerance which is a bloody gimmick for 99% of people.How many people were gluten intolerant in the 50's that were deathly ill, its simply eating too much and moving to little.

Graciefacey wrote: »

I would have to disagree, my self esteem is very high I just have no willpower!

CBT will find a deeper reason why you've fluctuated and feel so disgusting that you ate a chicken roll. It's completely nothing to be disgusted about at all.

I've got kind of two bits of advice, I'm lucky enough not to have suffered from any eating disorder but I'm very into fitness and my chocoalte. What I've found best is:

1) Try to think of the now not the when. I do eat a bit too much chocolate and find myself asking questions, is it the craving controlling me or do I really want the chocolate? Can I survive right now without it, and usually it's a yes. I try not to think into the future of ooo but I want it, when will I get chocolate, when can I pig out again? It's about the now and substituting that craving into something else, in your case a salad and to fill your appetite with that.

2) Also beating yourself would certainly increase your stress and reduce your will power; "can I really do this, can I keep this up?". What's done is done and to be honest a slip up here and there is fine. 99% of us don't aspire or never will reach the physique that marketing has portrayed as being "ideal". Those people in magazines etc are not really part of the general public. No one should aspire to be someone else, just look at your own case and be comfortable with your goals. Goals aren't reached overnight and we wouldn't be human without lapses in concentration or an odd slip up here and there.

All in all when you're about to make a decision, don't think of it as "I'm disgusting", think of it as, do I really need this right here right now. Can I survive without it and can I suplement it with something else? And the odd time that you do slip up, say, actually ye, I'd love to eat it! Enjoy it! You don't get to eat it much by the sounds of it, so enjoy it, don't beat yourself up about it, and just get back on track again straight away and hit the gym or whatever you do a little harder.

Everyone has fitness goals, but noone ever reaches those goals in reality, because we move the posts. I want to lose x weight, now I want to put on muscle, now x y and z. Be comfortable with hitting your main goals but realise it's a process. You'll be fine, if I beat myself up every time I slipped up I'd be twice the weight. I just hit the gym harder and try the rest of the time to eat clean.