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Requesting guest specific gift.

13567…29

Comments

  • #102
    rainbowtrout
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 15,382 ✭✭✭✭rainbowtrout


    clint_silver wrote: »
    Remember marge painted mister burns. And really captured his essence.

    Are you saying the OP should paint the couple naked sitting atop a mountain bike, a food mixer or a stack of argos catalogues??? :D


  • #103
    Lau2976
    Registered Users Posts: 1,030 ✭✭✭Lau2976


    rainbowtrout wrote: »
    Are you saying the OP should paint the couple naked sitting atop a mountain bike, a food mixer or a stack of argos catalogues??? :D

    Maybe all three? :D


  • #104
    Milly33
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 8,657 ✭✭✭Milly33


    Toots wrote: »
    Not for all the tea in China!!! :eek:



    I reckon this is exactly it. I knit and crochet and someone recently wanted me to make them a fancy cardigan type thing. They offered to pay me €200 and got really snotty when I said I couldn't do it. I told them that would just about cover the materials, and in addition it would take me weeks to finish it. Their response was "but sure why would you charge for something that you just do when you're sitting in front of the TV?". They were lucky the conversation happened by phone, cos if it had been face to face they'd have ended up having to have a crochet hook removed from somewhere unpleasant!

    Sure you know they were just speaking the truth, sure they could easily do it..Not the cheek of them


  • #105
    Kinley Nutritious File
    Posts: 0 CMod ✭✭✭✭ Kinley Nutritious File


    Picture of the mixer or bill them for the painting (and your friend bill them for the cakes) is the only way to go


  • #106
    bjork
    Closed Accounts Posts: 2,554 ✭✭✭bjork


    Lau2976 wrote: »
    I decided to give the benefit if the doubt and thought maybe they had forgotten about the portrait but just received a text from the groom asking if I can confirm the date for the sitting as they need to arrange a sitter. And a nice little side note asking if I needed to swap what gift I was getting them as they have other people asking to get them different things

    I think I might buy the mixer, paint it and then keep it for myself!

    They have also asked the guy who's making the cake to add on 90 cupcakes. And then sent him the measurements for the bike!

    Get them around to sit for an hour or 2 anyway, in silence posing while you paint the picture of the mixer


  • #107
    Tails142
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 2,117 ✭✭✭Tails142


    eh.... these are your friends why? =P


  • #108
    sillymoo
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,083 ✭✭✭sillymoo


    Lau2976 wrote: »
    I probably won't TBH. I have a few more weeks before I have to RSVP so I'll have a think but the cost is massive. Not only is it the gift an the painting but it requires me staying in a hotel if I decide to go to the reception as it's across the country.

    If it's near my house I'll put you up. I'll even drop you to and from the wedding.

    Only on the condition that you keep us all informed on this thread!


  • #109
    Whosthis
    Closed Accounts Posts: 1,342 ✭✭✭Whosthis


    For the benefit of the boards community I think its paramount that you attend this wedding. Set up a crowd funding page.


  • #110
    biketard
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 540 ✭✭✭biketard


    As well as you painting the mixer, you should get cake guy to do a cake of a kid's bicycle.


  • #111
    [Deleted User]
    Posts: 14,344 ✭✭✭✭ [Deleted User]


    Lau2976 wrote: »
    I probably won't TBH. I have a few more weeks before I have to RSVP so I'll have a think but the cost is massive. Not only is it the gift an the painting but it requires me staying in a hotel if I decide to go to the reception as it's across the country.


    I would in my hole!

    The money it's costing?! I'd just send them a text saying "sorry, I won't be around I've another event on", and I'd be on Ryanair's site looking to spend my money on a cheap and cheerful few days away.


    Have a word with the other chap doing the cake, and any other friends you know that are going, and have a little group holiday away, instead. You'd have a great 3-4 days away with €1,000 (and it's looking like that's at least what it's gonna cost you to attend this Wedding).


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  • #112
    Mathrew
    Registered Users Posts: 55 ✭✭Mathrew


    clint_silver wrote: »
    Different strokes for different folks here. I personally am way happier when I get an invite with a "we'd prefer gifts of x" with an invite. People know you're going to give a gift of some sort. It's just perfect logic to me to make sure the gift is something you actually need.
    Head over to adverts under the wedding section for pages and pages of presents for sale that aren't needed.
    Instead of it being crass on the invite Id see it as saving people money getting the wrong thing. Each to their own though.

    Me too, I'd prefer it, it would be a lot easier for me, instead of thinking what to buy.
    But it's very unusual, very few would be like that.


  • #113
    wuffly
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 662 ✭✭✭wuffly


    Surely this is some sort of social experiment to see how far you can push your wedding guests before they tell you to feck off?? Are you being secretly filmed?! I don't doubt you OP but they sound like complete a**sholes. The level of entitlement is off the charts!


  • #114
    Gatica
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 3,300 ✭✭✭Gatica


    Quote them for your planned work, whatever it is... 600 Euro? 700?
    Ask them will they be paying cash before the wedding.
    If they're cool to do that, then maybe take their cash, do their painting (job done). Decline the invitation.

    I don't know what ties you have to these people, but if there's nothing tying you to them, I'd be cutting them ties...
    Tbh though, would be best to tell them exactly what you think about requests for gifts and that you've no interest in attending their wedding or staying in touch.


  • #115
    NewYork1979
    Registered Users Posts: 129 ✭✭NewYork1979


    To be honest I'm getting a bit annoyed with the OP. I just don't see why you'd even contemplate going to this wedding and why you'd even be friends with them.


  • #116
    Feed Up
    Registered Users Posts: 55 ✭✭Feed Up


    I have never come across a 'specific gift' but I think a gift list is a great idea.

    For me anyway it takes all the hassle out and you also know that they want the thing.


  • #117
    lazygal
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 12,644 ✭✭✭✭lazygal


    Jaysus, I thought I'd heard it all with wedding related shenanegans!


  • #118
    loyatemu
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 15,107 ✭✭✭✭loyatemu


    assuming this isn't a windup, surely someone from their family or close friends would tell them that this is not the done thing in Ireland (or anywhere else I'd suspect). They sound deluded, living in a self-absorbed wedding bubble, someone needs to snap them out of it.

    OP - how well do you know these people, is it in keeping with their character generally?


  • #119
    Oryx
    Subscribers Posts: 19,425 ✭✭✭✭Oryx


    The icing on the (wedding) cake really is the bike for the kid. This is something the happy, greedy, avaricious, scheming couple should be buying themselves for the child if they feel it's required. To ask a guest to provide it is just the most presumptuous and self centred thing I have ever heard. If these people go any further up themselves theyll turn inside out.


  • #120
    Sligo1
    Closed Accounts Posts: 3,948 ✭✭✭Sligo1


    Lau2976 wrote: »
    I decided to give the benefit if the doubt and thought maybe they had forgotten about the portrait but just received a text from the groom asking if I can confirm the date for the sitting as they need to arrange a sitter. And a nice little side note asking if I needed to swap what gift I was getting them as they have other people asking to get them different things

    I think I might buy the mixer, paint it and then keep it for myself!

    They have also asked the guy who's making the cake to add on 90 cupcakes. And then sent him the measurements for the bike!

    OP seriously.... This has HAS to be a windup???


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  • #121
    Sligo1
    Closed Accounts Posts: 3,948 ✭✭✭Sligo1


    Neyite wrote: »
    No, the same one. :) I call it dinnergate to differentiate it from the usual bridsmaidsgates that happen.

    *wonders if the mod is open to bribes to reinstate that thread...*

    I thought at the very end after bridesmaid gate thread was closed Toots did actually post an update from the OP? I remember reading it and it posted about what actually then went down on the day. I'm sure I read what happened in the end. Perhaps the thread has since been deleted.... Maybe I dreamt it??!


  • #122
    beyondbelief67
    Registered Users Posts: 550 ✭✭✭beyondbelief67


    Sligo1 wrote: »
    I thought at the very end after bridesmaid gate thread was closed Toots did actually post an update from the OP? I remember reading it and it posted about what actually then went down on the day. I'm sure I read what happened in the end. Perhaps the thread has since been deleted.... Maybe I dreamt it??!
    No you didn't dream it, the op sent the update and toots posted it and it was every bit as bad as we had feared !


  • #123
    NewCorkLad
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 958 ✭✭✭NewCorkLad


    beyondbelief67 wrote: »
    No you didn't dream it, the op sent the update and toots posted it and it was every bit as bad as we had feared !

    I would love to know if they still have any friends after it.


  • #124
    NewCorkLad
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 958 ✭✭✭NewCorkLad


    http://www.boards.ie/vbulletin/showthread.php?t=2057262110

    Found it


  • #125
    dobsdave
    Closed Accounts Posts: 1,814 ✭✭✭dobsdave


    I would contact them requesting the first payment on the portrait.


  • #126
    toadfly
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 3,412 ✭✭✭toadfly


    NewCorkLad wrote: »
    http://www.boards.ie/vbulletin/showthread.php?t=2057262110

    Found it

    Is the original thread around or gone forever?!


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  • #127
    NewCorkLad
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 958 ✭✭✭NewCorkLad


    toadfly wrote: »
    Is the original thread around or gone forever?!

    Gone Forever


  • #128
    carltonleon
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,178 ✭✭✭carltonleon


    You should paint the portrait like a caricture ..... with moths flying out of just opened wallets


  • #129
    Milly33
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 8,657 ✭✭✭Milly33


    NewCorkLad wrote: »
    http://www.boards.ie/vbulletin/showthread.php?t=2057262110

    Found it

    OMG skitting I was reading it to the other girl in work. I knew I remembered something about them being stranded..

    What a twat of a couple I must say.. I would have started a tab at the bar for them and left it running...


  • #130
    Neyite
    Society & Culture Moderators Posts: 25,947 Mod ✭✭✭✭Neyite


    bjork wrote: »
    Get them around to sit for an hour or 2 anyway, in silence posing while you paint the picture of the mixer

    You made me laugh out loud at work. If I get fired, its all your fault! :P


  • #131
    skallywag
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 3,008 ✭✭✭skallywag


    D3PO wrote: »
    its rude and ignorant to expect a gift not to mind specify one..

    I don't agree. It is perfectly normal to expect wedding gift to be given from those who you invite.


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  • #132
    tinkerbell
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 6,423 ✭✭✭tinkerbell


    :eek: :eek: :eek: :eek: :eek:

    *grabs box of popcorn leftover from bridesmaidgate*

    I love the Weddings forum!!! :pac:


  • #133
    CaraMay
    Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 4,652 ✭✭✭CaraMay


    Deleted User wrote: »
    The most recent Wedding I was at had the following request on the Invite
    "The only present we require is YOUR presence. Please help us make our special day memorable."

    I like that. That's classy. I don't agree with people having to pay out for an event you have invited them to.


  • #134
    sparksfly
    Registered Users Posts: 552 ✭✭✭sparksfly


    skallywag wrote: »
    I don't agree. It is perfectly normal to expect wedding gift to be given from those who you invite.

    We invited friends to our wedding because they were just that, our friends and we wanted them there. If they gave a gift -great. If not-great as well.

    Anybody who even dreams of mentioning wedding gifts on an invitation is crass beyond belief. Why not extend this racket to birthday parties, christenings and confirmations as well.


  • #135
    sunshine and showers
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 2,027 ✭✭✭sunshine and showers


    If they want a mixer that badly, I'd text back confirmation for the painting sitting asking for confirmation of the address to send the invoice for it to. The cheek!


  • #136
    westernlass
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 598 ✭✭✭westernlass


    I'm here panicking to make sure we don't rely on presents and people get away with asking for two, that's insane.

    I'm hoping to ask a friend to help me with the cake but I'm nervous it's too much pressure on her. She's made loads and I'd buy all the ingredients but as far I'm concerned that's more than a big present. I actually hate the idea of asking for anything, how do people have the cheek?

    We choose to get married. Our friends didn't choose to give us a ton of presents to attend


  • #137
    Sligo1
    Closed Accounts Posts: 3,948 ✭✭✭Sligo1


    I've actually come to the conclusion that this thread is a complete and utter have. If it's not.... It beats cupcake gate, bridesmaid/dinnergate and all other threads ever posted on this and other similar wedding forums. O bar the one where some woman was going apesh*t because her children who were cousins of a cousins cousin weren't invited to a wedding that she was invited to.


  • #138
    tinkerbell
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 6,423 ✭✭✭tinkerbell


    ^ oh, I'd forgotten about that one Sligo!!! Hee hee :D


  • #139
    westernlass
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 598 ✭✭✭westernlass


    The one about the cousins kids was legit I thought. She was all over another forum too


  • #140
    vanessamee
    Registered Users Posts: 194 ✭✭vanessamee


    You will be the bigger fool if you give in and buy the stand mixer ive one but only because im a chef. paid 700 for my one. id ger her a bowl and for ever five years married id send a hand held mixer (tesco 20e) than id send them mixing tongs and so on actually send a plug first.


  • #141
    michellie
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 2,691 ✭✭✭michellie


    westernlass wrote: »
    The one about the cousins kids was legit I thought. She was all over another forum too

    Yea and wasn't there like 5 children?


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  • #142
    beyondbelief67
    Registered Users Posts: 550 ✭✭✭beyondbelief67


    michellie wrote: »
    Yea and wasn't there like 5 children?

    Yes and she had told them they were going, and I think either got them the outfits for it or told them what they would be wearing to it, and was all set to bring grandad in to sort the wedding couple out because she hasn't got her way !!!


  • #143
    westernlass
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 598 ✭✭✭westernlass


    I just meant I think she was actually nuts and not a troll


  • #144
    ShazGV
    Registered Users Posts: 1,508 ✭✭✭ShazGV


    I am nowhere near getting married (though I do work on the fringes of the wedding business) but this forum is my new favourite.
    Laughed out loud multiple times reading through this thread, especially at the portrait of the stand mixer, hilarious. :D


  • #145
    Lau2976
    Registered Users Posts: 1,030 ✭✭✭Lau2976


    I was sketching last night and ended up drawing the stand mixer after getting a call from the mother of the bride.

    Her and my mother are close and my moter had mentioned that I was baffled at their request. She called me to apologize. She said she was trying to reign them both in but that both regard the gift as payment for the invite.

    She said they had decided to value my portrait at €35. I was totally taken back and furious! She valued the mixer at €200 and said that they thought that €235 was a reasonable gift!


  • #146
    bjork
    Closed Accounts Posts: 2,554 ✭✭✭bjork


    Lau2976 wrote: »
    I was sketching last night and ended up drawing the stand mixer after getting a call from the mother of the bride.

    Her and my mother are close and my moter had mentioned that I was baffled at their request. She called me to apologize. She said she was trying to reign them both in but that both regard the gift as payment for the invite.

    She said they had decided to value my portrait at €35. I was totally taken back and furious! She valued the mixer at €200 and said that they thought that €235 was a reasonable gift!


    Value the portrait at €10,000 and ask her for your change. :pac:

    It's fairly obvious she's not living on the same planet at the rest of us!!


  • #147
    westernlass
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 598 ✭✭✭westernlass


    I'd be seeing red. As a bride to be even to cover your guests costs the average is 100e per head. But you dont get married to make money!!!!

    Invest the money you are spending on sometime else if thats the case


  • #148
    XxMCRxBabyxX
    Moderators, Education Moderators Posts: 7,439 Mod ✭✭✭✭XxMCRxBabyxX


    Lau2976 wrote: »

    Her and my mother are close and my moter had mentioned that I was baffled at their request. She called me to apologize. She said she was trying to reign them both in but that both regard the gift as payment for the invite.

    €235 was a reasonable gift!

    Nice to see that they really value your presence. That's outrageous.


  • #149
    westernlass
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 598 ✭✭✭westernlass


    Also an average painting or portrait goes at 750e. I know cos we bought one lately for a family member.


  • #150
    ShazGV
    Registered Users Posts: 1,508 ✭✭✭ShazGV


    €35 for a portrait?! Christ, I understand to a certain extent when people don't realise the cost of materials/labour/etc for things like this (like the knitting mentioned earlier in the thread too) but where is she off to with that price.

    And €235 a 'reasonable gift'? Kindly feck off.


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  • #151
    Oryx
    Subscribers Posts: 19,425 ✭✭✭✭Oryx


    €35 wouldnt even pay for the blank canvas.


This discussion has been closed.
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