Weirdos on the bus

LolaDub · 22-08-2008 11:20am

Zzippy wrote: »

We have a winner! :P

+1

ekevosu · 22-08-2008 1:27pm

Moonbaby wrote: »

Heading back to NYC from the bowels of middle America on an excruitiatingly long greyhound coach trip.
.........
I decided to look for the skinniest (breathing space), moodiest , most uncommunicative looking fecker I could find.
I settled on a chinese man, and was delighted when he turned his back to me as I sat down.
They turned the lights down low, and off I drifted to the land of nod.
At this point I should probably point out that I make a point of not sleeping in public.
I have a tendancy to talk in my sleep and I don't say nice things.:o
But I slept throughly, until the rising sun started to worry at the sleep in my eyes.
I tried my best to stay suspended there in that warm comfortable place between both worlds.
Until I realised that I shouldn't be warm.
I rocketed to my senses to find myself indecently assaulting the chinese man! And judging from the residual heat I'd been doing it for quite a while.:eek:
I saw his eyes flutter and I realised that he was awake and aware of the situation.
I extracated myself and he pretended to sleep for the rest of the journey while I blushed furiously.

was there not an incident recently involving a greyhound bus in north america, a chinese man and a man sleeping beside him..... and the loss of a head!!!!!! Guess the headless guy wasn't as friendly as you....

marti101 · 22-08-2008 3:13pm

My son was on the luas on some mad fella was eyeing up my sons toblerone and he was locked and he wouldnt leave anybody alone.Cause he was annoying everybody about something or other.

monkeyfudge · 22-08-2008 3:23pm

I hope toblerone isn't a euphemism there...

Dinxminx · 22-08-2008 3:53pm

Not the bus, but a couple of weeks ago on the Luas I was sitting, dozing with my head against the glass when this homeless man came and stood right in front of me. Suddenly, apropos of nothing, he kicked me hard in the shin. When I stared at him, he yelled "MUSEUM!"

"What?" I asked.
"MUSEUM!" he yelled again.
He kicked me again and I glared at him.

"ARE YOU GETTING OFF AT MUSEUM!??"
I shook my head at him and moved my legs to the side.

He got off at the next stop.

:eek:

Dinxminx · 22-08-2008 3:58pm

mental07 wrote: »

Was on a bus from Galway to Dublin a couple of years ago. We were about an hour away and there were only a handful of others remaining on the bus. I was minding my own business, earphones in, when suddenly I felt a brushing on my shoulder. Turned around. There was a man (scrawny. small. moustached. greasy. sleazy-looking) sitting behind me just staring at me. Gave him a "what the hell are you doing?!" look and turned back around. He did the same thing again. I ignored it this time and he stopped...for about five minutes and then he did it again. Except this time he actually groped my, ahem, chest. So basically I sat there, got groped numerous times, removed his hand each time, threw him some serious daggers but he just wouldn't stop. Until eventually I could take it no more and I just turned around and yelled "Stop it! Please!" Each time I looked at him he was just sitting there, motionless, staring at me, staring through me even. It was really creepy! Needless to say, when the bus stopped at O'Connell bridge I was first off! Legged it up O'Connell St. SO FAST to get my bus home from town...

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!! I'm laughing at my desk and everyone now thinks I'm crazy! Thank you!

marti101 · 22-08-2008 4:14pm

monkeyfudge wrote: »

I hope toblerone isn't a euphemism there...

God i never thought of that,i hope so too.:D

Madame Razz · 22-08-2008 5:25pm

Ok, im from the sticks so the whole train/bus thing is sort of lost on me.....always a few oddballs on the train to Dublin though.

Had this eejit sit opposite me with his friend and try to get my attention. The more he tried to get my attention the more engrossed i became in my book, until eventually he SAT on my legs(i had them up on the seat opposite)!!!!!!!

He was getting off in Tullamore and insisted i gave him my number and took his before he got off the train.

The doors were closing and he wasn't getting off. Harrassed me until we got to Clara for my number, eventually i succumbed, cos he was cute, cos i felt bad he'd missed his stop, and cos, admittedly, i was oddly flattered by his efforts!!

Anyway, he turned out to be a lot younger than he looked, he was only 20, so i didnt keep contact with him after that....feckin gas tho.

We had a fella on our skool bus years ago that used to set girls hair on fire tho:eek:, and take the tapes(yes, back in the day!!) out of ppls walkmans and fcuk them out the window...he also pulled the stuffing out of the seats every so often.....strange chap really thinking back on it!!

MrVestek · 22-08-2008 5:44pm

Rozabeez wrote: »

There's one guy who practically lives on the 66 bus, he's small, old, grunts and growls to himself, and scratches his little baldy head til it bleeds.

I know the guy you're on about. He argues with himself alot too shouting 'ahhh he was a ****ing ****... a ****ing **** I would have killed him' etc... severe split personality disorder methinks.

He used to be on the 66 alot when I'd be visiting friends in Maynooth. Thankfully I leave nearer the train line now :-)

snickerpuss · 22-08-2008 5:50pm

If somebody kicked me in the shin, or stroked my hair, they'd be getting a slap upside the head at least.
Maybe that reflects my status as dodgy northsider though. You people are way too nice!

I usually get the 27, which is a bit dodgy but the worst I had was some junkie getting me to spell stuff on their phone for them. Quite nice really. And lots of old women telling me bizarre stories.

JaneyMc · 22-08-2008 7:27pm

One night about 4 years ago was on my way home from work, was sitting talking to my mate not paying any attention when this guy gets on the bus screaming at the bus driver "CAN I GET ON THE BUS??? CAN I???" It took me a few seconds to twig, he was completely in the nude :eek: It was a female bus driver as well, she just sat there flabbergasted. He eventually got off and she pulled away. There was no sign of the guy, we eventually spotted him in a parked car putting his clothes back on and some guy was sitting there with a video camera in his hand! Must have been some sort of bet/forfeit.

There is also a guy who insists on sitting beside me in the morning on the bus, even if there are like 10 other double seats free It drives me mental, because he smells awful and sometimes its that bad it makes me want to physically heave. Not really weird, but very annoying.

EDIT: Was on the 49 before and there was a woman sitting across from me eating a packet of King crisps but not using her fingers, she just shoved her whole face in the bag, and then would throw her head back like a duck eating, munch the crisps then do it again. It was very strange, I mean her hands worked properly, she was texting a few minutes earlier.

monkeyfudge · 22-08-2008 7:54pm

snickerpuss wrote: »

I usually get the 27, which is a bit dodgy but the worst I had was some junkie getting me to spell stuff on their phone for them. Quite nice really. And lots of old women telling me bizarre stories.

Ah the 27. I once saw a woman change her babies nappie on the lower floor of the bus. Worst of all she used an empty bag of Tayto to wipe the babies bottom.

snickerpuss · 22-08-2008 8:46pm

Sounds like the 27 alright!

allandanyways · 22-08-2008 10:14pm

Speaking of baby stuff on the bus... there's a woman gets my bus that breastfeeds every time she gets on the bus (like everytime im on the bus and she's on it aswel.. i cant speak for all her bus journeys..) Right fine, breastfeedings natural and all that but firstly, the child she's breastfeeding cant be younger than 5 y.o. and secondly she leaves her boobs hanging out after she feeds like she wants them to cool off or something... was interesting bringing my wee cousin on a bus for the first time and there's yer wan hanging out...

Pythia · 23-08-2008 12:24am

There was a woman on the bus before who was mentally not all there. She kept accusing everyone who sat down beside her of wanting to rape her. They'd get up and sit somewhere else, but then someone else would get on and it would happen again. Was absolutely hilarious.

....shell.... · 23-08-2008 1:53am

Was on the bus one day with a friend and sat down the back as there were only about ten people sitting down...a few seats ahead of us was the crazy guy who started roaring at us sayin he was going to stab us and stand over us and watch us bleed to death..saying noone would ever find our bodies...needless to say we were terrified and moved to top of the bus and he continued shouting about how he would take his knife out and slit throats...we prayed for the bus driver to stop and get rid of him but he got off at next stop...

thusspakeblixa · 23-08-2008 2:08am

The 150 is a veritable mental asylum these days
On the way back from a concert in Temple Bar once me and my friend sat at the front. This guy gets on, starts talking about the concert, then asks us to check out his daughter (gave us her number and bebo), starts telling us how we're great guys and how a lady would be lucky to have us (never met the guy before)
Another guy spat on my neck before. I turned around and he just said ''ich kann nicht englisch sprechen''. So, as I speak German, I asked him why he spat at me and called him a twat in german. And then he just walked away...
And then another time a girl just broke down in tears in front of me...really upsetting, as she just was crying... not begging for money or help or anything...
I still love the 150 though

dfx- · 23-08-2008 2:17am

Getting the bus home from Drumcondra, I think the 11, one woman got on and sat down and every so often would start screaming, shaking her head everywhere and then settle down again...then start muttering away to herself and again, scream and shake her head and then settl...etc.

Once on the 51B, a random lad who turned out to be a boxer eyeballed a 9 yr old stranger because one of them slagged another 9 year old they knew :eek:

That's before I go onto the 77 group..

tk123 · 23-08-2008 7:23pm

dfx- wrote: »

Getting the bus home from Drumcondra, I think the 11, one woman got on and sat down and every so often would start screaming, shaking her head everywhere and then settle down again...then start muttering away to herself and again, scream and shake her head and then settl...etc.

.

I was going to post about her! If it's the same person she gets the 19/19A as well - screams/mutters and bites her hands:eek:. Another time on the 19/19A I can't remember if it was the same aul one, the bus is stuck in croker traffic so it's crawling home, she's muttering to herself the whole time saying 'the judge said you should never harm children" then in a different voice 'yes that's right you should never harm a child" over and over again.:eek:

A friend of mine was getting hassled one time on the nitelink (she was sitting in the higher seats over the wheels) by some guy so takes her phone out to pretend he's busy. He tried tries to take the phone off her so tells him to fcuk off and pushes him away only the guy slides out of the seat onto the floor. The bus driver stops asks whats going on and a woman says 'he's been bothering that girl since we left town' (20 mins or so) the driver opens the side door and throws the guy out. :pac:

thusspakeblixa · 23-08-2008 11:50pm

dfx- wrote: »

That's before I go onto the 77 group..

the 77 and 77a are the bane of my life too.
Lets not even start...

Monkey61 · 25-08-2008 11:39am

Myself and my girlfriend live in London and being paupers, we usually take the bus home to Dublin and back.

On one particular occasion we had the misfortune to sit behind a rather rotund one legged, diabetic, gentleman who's foghorn like voice could only be described as being of the "Quavery high pitched, rural child molester" type. All was well until we reached our final break. He exited the bus and returned to find that his phone had disappeared. At this point he began to scream at the top of his creepy voice "I only have one leg"and "I'm a diabetic. I have to eat. Constantly." Also "I have to drink sugary drinks. Constantly."

A man a couple of seats back told him that he had seen his phone left on the seat when we were all getting off the bus. Long John Silver goes feckin' mental at the man for not picking up the phone and minding it for him. Cue more shouting about only having one leg.

Then the bus driver had to get involved. He said he would let the man use his phone when we got to London cos the guy needed to ring his brother to get a lift. Guy goes even more mental - "My brother is a wanted man" he screams, "he's not going to answer the phone if it's not my number." Then he throws himself down on the ground and starts scrabbling around under the seats to look for the phone. My girlfriend tells him to calm down and that we had already looked there at which point he starts punching her in the leg while screeching "where did you put it? Where's my phone?"

Never did I think I would face the dilemma of wondering whether it was okay to hit a one legged diabetic man. I did not for fear that popular opinion would turn against me terribly and also because it was 5am and nobody was really thinking straight.

He eventually calmed down - until ten minutes down the road when he started talking to the bus driver.

Driver - "Sorry man I can't really chat now, I need to concentrate on the road."
Diabetic - "Oh yeah anyway" and on he would go.

This happened about six times before the guy starts getting riled up and starts abusing the bus driver.

Diabetic - Sure you can't even drive the bus.

Driver screeches to a halt - "What did you say?...Well...well... what did you say? Can I or can I not drive the bus? Eh? Eh?"

Twas madness indeed.

LolaDub · 25-08-2008 12:40pm

I thought the 150 was a nice bus!! On the 54a once before a handicapped boy threw a bottle of water on my backside when i stood up to get off and starting shouting you've wet yourself!!!:o

rainbow kirby · 25-08-2008 12:53pm

You really do get some, erm, special people on buses to Tallaght.

LolaDub · 25-08-2008 12:56pm

The tallaght buses are something else! I'm in templeogue so i get to run off after about 20 mins Thank God!

rainbow kirby · 25-08-2008 1:21pm

I'm in Firhouse, so it's a bit further away - but at least I don't have to get the 77! You do get some prize tards on the 49 though.

MrVestek · 25-08-2008 5:29pm

LolaDub wrote: »

I thought the 150 was a nice bus!! On the 54a once before a handicapped boy threw a bottle of water on my backside when i stood up to get off and starting shouting you've wet yourself!!!:o

Hehehe ok ok you win the Internet!

thusspakeblixa · 25-08-2008 7:30pm

LolaDub wrote: »

I thought the 150 was a nice bus!! On the 54a once before a handicapped boy threw a bottle of water on my backside when i stood up to get off and starting shouting you've wet yourself!!!:o

Well I mean the 150 makes any of the Tallaght buses look like a Royal Carriage. Most of the crazy ones get off in the Barn or at the Black Horse, and if you're upstairas ya miss em

LolaDub · 25-08-2008 8:03pm

I always try to sit downstairs now in case i need to leg it or move up to the driver. in fairness the handicapped kid wasn't a weirdo probably it was just an odd thing. And having to leave the bus and walk home with a massive wet patch down my ass wasn't the most lovely of days

MrVestek · 26-08-2008 5:51pm

LolaDub wrote: »

I always try to sit downstairs now in case i need to leg it or move up to the driver. in fairness the handicapped kid wasn't a weirdo probably it was just an odd thing. And having to leave the bus and walk home with a massive wet patch down my ass wasn't the most lovely of days

I'm surprised you didn't attract even more weirdos walking down home with said wet patch tbh.

LolaDub · 26-08-2008 10:46pm

I know its a sexy picture but they managed to keep it in their pants Thank God

Odysseus · 26-08-2008 11:28pm

I grew up in Ballyfermot, I really can't believe the 78A isn't metioned on this tread. I always find it interesting to watch peoples reaction to addicts and their behaviour on buses. I'm somewhat immune to it as I work in a treatment facility, but if your not used to it its interesting to watch peoples reactions.

IanCurtis · 27-08-2008 12:59am

Trinity1 wrote: »

When i was younger an old man tried to feel my boob and put his hand on my leg on the bus. I was shaking and crying when i got home. I blamed myself as i said he looked a bit lilke sean connery. I certainly was not chatting him up but he obviously got the wrong idea! I do not tell people who they look like anymore

Completely off-topic, but that reminds me so much of the story when Paul "Gazza" Gascoigne met Sean Connery. Gazza shook his hand and turned around to his mate and said "Imagine how many tits that hand has been on!"

Hmm, maybe that was Sean Connery!

thusspakeblixa · 27-08-2008 10:14pm

Odysseus wrote: »

I grew up in Ballyfermot, I really can't believe the 78A isn't metioned on this tread. I always find it interesting to watch peoples reaction to addicts and their behaviour on buses. I'm somewhat immune to it as I work in a treatment facility, but if your not used to it its interesting to watch peoples reactions.

...the 18 is nearly as bad
My abiding memory of the 78A will always be the junkies down the back. ALWAYS there.

Weirdos on the bus

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