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age difference....

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  • 12-09-2008 5:59pm
    #1
    grumpyno2
    Closed Accounts Posts: 3 ✭


    okeee! im 23 yr old gal!
    have interest from 18 year old guy ,in the past week(only met him last wk).. my older cousins boyf's younger friend...
    at first i was messing around, saying haha my toyboy.. and he came rgiht out and told my cuz he thinks i'm "hot" and really nice etc..
    considering i'v been single past 2 years.. i'm completely flattered...but he's 18!
    so.. didnt take any notice till he adds me to msn.. chatting away, then after having 3 way conversation with cousin.. he comes out with it sayign he likes me.. eeek!! has my number now..
    he's lovely, acts and looks older than 18!
    as a friend says wont make any differnce when i'm 90 and he's 85 lol!!
    but advice on how to let him down gently cos he's a nice lad or do i go for it?


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Comments

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    #2
    Dudess
    Closed Accounts Posts: 37,215 ✭✭✭✭Dudess


    No-brainer. If you like him, go for it. Far better to go for it, have things not work out (if they don't) and at least have given it a shot, rather than putting a stop to it just because of his age (not a good enough reason in my opinion) and spend ages wondering "what if". There's a considerable difference between 18 and 23 - particularly in terms of life stages - but who's to say these will prove to be obstacles unless you go find out for yourself?

    Others will probably pass comments and stuff but again, that's not good enough reason to go for it. This is about the two of you, not them.


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    #3
    veryangryman
    Registered Users Posts: 5,540 ✭✭✭veryangryman


    :rolleyes:

    Im not touching this one with a 40 foot pole...


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    #4
    challengemaster
    Registered Users Posts: 16,931 ✭✭✭✭challengemaster


    Stop being silly about it. You're both adults.


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    #5
    Dr P Bear
    Closed Accounts Posts: 6 ✭Dr P Bear


    "We that are true lovers run into strange capers; but as all is mortal in nature, so is all nature in love mortal
    in folly."


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    #6
    randylonghorn
    Moderators, Education Moderators Posts: 29,509 Mod ✭✭✭✭randylonghorn


    23 / 18?

    You're hardly Mrs. Robinson!

    If that's the only thing that's stopping you, pfft, tbh!

    Taking it slowly and light-heartedly at first, and not rushing into anything, might be a sensible approach though.


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    #7
    Raze_them_all
    Closed Accounts Posts: 13,477 ✭✭✭✭Raze_them_all


    tis only 5 years. I'm only 19 and i was hooking up with a 29 year old. Dont worry bout age


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    #8
    Black Swan
    Moderators, Category Moderators, Science, Health & Environment Moderators, Society & Culture Moderators Posts: 47,226 CMod ✭✭✭✭Black Swan


    Robbing the cradle! (OK, someone had to say it) Go for it, ha!


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    #9
    Luuca
    Closed Accounts Posts: 37 ✭Luuca


    My friend married her husband 9 years younger than her last year. They are as happy as Larry so I wouldn't worry about the age gap.


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    #10
    [Deleted User]
    Posts: 0 ✭ [Deleted User]


    It is only common sense for a woman to look for such an age gap.
    They have shorter lifespans.


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    #11
    The Bollox
    Closed Accounts Posts: 5,372 ✭✭✭The Bollox


    feckin' pedraphiles :D

    my current gf is 4 years older than I am (I'm 22 she's 26), I don't see the harm. if you like each other then what's stopping you?


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    #12
    Dudess
    Closed Accounts Posts: 37,215 ✭✭✭✭Dudess


    veryangryman wrote: »
    :rolleyes:

    Im not touching this one with a 40 foot pole...
    Why? Would you be using the rolleyes symbol if the OP was a 23-year-old guy interested in an 18-year-old girl?


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    #13
    veryangryman
    Registered Users Posts: 5,540 ✭✭✭veryangryman


    Dudess, i couldnt find a smiley that looks upward at that post. The rolleyes is as close as i can get.

    Ok ill touch it with a 40 foot pole so...:pac:

    There is no definitive answer to the OPs question. Depends on the people, circumstances etc. Just be ready for occasional (good natured) slaggings at first.

    As for whether id so the rolleyes on a guy with a girl that much younger, i think i would.


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    #14
    LolaLuv
    Closed Accounts Posts: 2,496 ✭✭✭LolaLuv


    If you're comfortable with it, then go for it. But it seems you aren't, so what's holding you back? Fear of social censure?


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    #15
    Cmol
    Closed Accounts Posts: 732 ✭✭✭Cmol


    veryangryman wrote: »
    Dudess, i couldnt find a smiley that looks upward at that post. The rolleyes is as close as i can get.

    Ok ill touch it with a 40 foot pole so...:pac:

    There is no definitive answer to the OPs question. Depends on the people, circumstances etc. Just be ready for occasional (good natured) slaggings at first.

    As for whether id so the rolleyes on a guy with a girl that much younger, i think i would.

    That much younger??? Its 5 Years!!! Hardly a lifetime...


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    #16
    Zaph
    Registered Users, Subscribers Posts: 47,280 ✭✭✭✭Zaph


    Cmol wrote: »
    Its 5 Years!!! Hardly a lifetime...

    It is for my nephew. :)

    Personally I reckon that if you're interested at all, as opposed to just being flattered, go for it. Sure what's the worst that can happen? Actually it may be best you don't read the worst dates thread...


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    #17
    Jemmy
    Registered Users Posts: 3,385 ✭✭✭Jemmy


    I say go for it if you like, you'll regret it otherwise. Was in a similar situation before and didnt go for it bcoz of the age sorry i didnt now! :(


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    #18
    GirlInterrupted
    Closed Accounts Posts: 1,440 ✭✭✭GirlInterrupted


    Jemmy wrote: »
    I say go for it if you like, you'll regret it otherwise. Was in a similar situation before and didnt go for it bcoz of the age sorry i didnt now! :(

    My mother was nineteen when she met my father who was thirty four, and within six months of meeting, they married. They just celebrated their 40th wedding aniversary this summer.

    They are - very obviously - still in love :).

    Take from that whatever you like.


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    #19
    Kotick
    Closed Accounts Posts: 86 ✭✭Kotick


    After they're legal, age doesn't matter. Go for it!


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    #20
    omb0wyn5ehpij9
    Closed Accounts Posts: 16,095 ✭✭✭✭omb0wyn5ehpij9


    I say go for it!


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    #21
    pow wow
    Closed Accounts Posts: 5,288 ✭✭✭pow wow


    Cmol wrote: »
    That much younger??? Its 5 Years!!! Hardly a lifetime...

    Could seem like a lifetime when he's only 18!

    But they're both young, might aswell go for it. :D


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    #22
    cee_jay
    Moderators, Business & Finance Moderators Posts: 7,920 Mod ✭✭✭✭cee_jay


    Seriously age is only a number. What have you got to lose by going for it?


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    #23
    Madame Razz
    Closed Accounts Posts: 13,252 ✭✭✭✭Madame Razz


    cAr0l wrote: »
    Seriously age is only a number. What have you got to lose by going for it?


    I agree!! My best relationship to date was with a guy a few years younger than me. Everything about the relationship was fantastic. He was more mature than other men I have dated who were older/ alot older than me. He was the model boyfriend. I could have missed out on what was a fantastic relationship if I had left his age stand in the way!

    Age IS only a number, its all about the person themselves at the end of the day.


    THe main thing is that the person makes you happy. Its hard to find that person. Don't make it all the harder by imposing silly age restrictions upon yourself.

    You can't choose who you fall in love with;)


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    #24
    Toto Wolfcastle
    Registered Users Posts: 25,005 ✭✭✭✭Toto Wolfcastle


    Yeah go for it. Expect some people to comment on it though. I have a friend who thinks it's weird that I'm even friends with a 19 year old. (I'm 22) Some people find it weird, but all that matters is how you feel.


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    #25
    greenapplesea
    Closed Accounts Posts: 96 ✭✭greenapplesea


    I say go for it girl! My boyfriend is younder than me and I couldn't be happier- he's a fantastic boyfriend. Fun yet mature and sensible. There can be some issues with life stages/the future etc. but every other part of our relationship make up for this! I say take things slow at first, have fun and just feel out what he's looking for in a girlfriend before you get too serious.


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    #26
    LightningBolt
    Registered Users Posts: 1,639 ✭✭✭LightningBolt


    Just go for it, no point in having regrets


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    #27
    Burial
    Registered Users Posts: 817 ✭✭✭Burial


    Can I just ask a genuine quesion, what is the problem here? If it was a male at 23 and the girl at 18, there wouldn't be a problem... but if it's vice-versa there somehow is...

    Anyway, what do you care what other people think? Peer pressure won't make you happy. If you like this guy go for it. Simple.


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    #28
    veryangryman
    Registered Users Posts: 5,540 ✭✭✭veryangryman


    What is wrong with you people?!

    Ill say it again..

    IT DEPENDS ON THE PEOPLE INVOLVED

    It not "ok" or "not okay". **** lads the only difference it should make is to the 2 people in question


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    #29
    Burial
    Registered Users Posts: 817 ✭✭✭Burial


    veryangryman wrote: »
    What is wrong with you people?!

    Ill say it again..

    IT DEPENDS ON THE PEOPLE INVOLVED

    It not "ok" or "not okay". **** lads the only difference it should make is to the 2 people in question

    Your username does you justice! Care to provide an example where a 19 year old dating a 23 year old wouldn't be ok? I honestly can't think of any..


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    #30
    Zaph
    Registered Users, Subscribers Posts: 47,280 ✭✭✭✭Zaph


    veryangryman wrote: »
    What is wrong with you people?!

    Ill say it again..

    IT DEPENDS ON THE PEOPLE INVOLVED

    It not "ok" or "not okay". **** lads the only difference it should make is to the 2 people in question

    We would greatly appreciate it if you toned it down a bit in your future posts on this forum.

    Thank you


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    #31
    Phlann
    Users Awaiting Email Confirmation Posts: 827 ✭✭✭Phlann


    I went out with an 18 year old girl when I was 22 and I found the age difference made it pretty difficult for us to talk to each other.

    I agree that when you're a bit older the age difference doesn't matter that much, but at 18 you've still got an awful lot of growing up to do.

    I'd go for it anyway though, just be aware that the immaturity might start to grate a little after a while.


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