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BGRH Escorts Inc.

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2

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    #32
    citytillidie
    Registered Users Posts: 22,050 ✭✭✭✭citytillidie


    Chewy

    You can fill in the special requests if the wimmin enquires about other female attention :p

    ******



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    #33
    Galvasean
    Registered Users Posts: 30,746 ✭✭✭✭Galvasean


    ChewChew wrote: »
    I feel very hard done by with this.

    When I enter teh bar I sometimes (ok most of the time) feel like one of the brothers. Even though I is a wimminz.

    I do not make shambo's. I only eat them.

    I do not partake in the washing up.

    I drink only beer.

    I'll belch and fart like the rest of you boys if you wish.

    I have a gut, and currently working on filling it with beer.

    I'm getting old and losing the hair everytime I wash it.

    You know, youre only a nip or two away from being one of us.


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    #34
    ruthiedv
    Closed Accounts Posts: 107 ✭✭ruthiedv


    Slow Motion wrote: »

    This is a new service and questions and suggestions for additional services are welcome, enquire below!

    I think your idea is nothing short of genius. You have identified a definite need there. Maybe optional toilet blocking and sheet skidding services to make sure we're nice and busy and so don't interrupt the beer drinking with conversation and other unnecessary trivia.


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    #35
    legspin
    Registered Users Posts: 1,018 ✭✭✭legspin


    Kharn wrote: »
    An ex teacher of mine was a rose of Tralee escort and he made hints that it was rather a good laugh :)

    .

    I know a couple of blokes who were escorts and they said 'twas good craic alright but they had to pay for pretty much everything themselves. No free beer in other words.


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    #36
    Nevyn
    Closed Accounts Posts: 43,045 ✭✭✭✭Nevyn


    This is a very different type of service.


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    #37
    Splinter
    Hosted Moderators Posts: 3,331 ✭✭✭Splinter


    grames_bond wrote: »
    i had a teacher who entered the rose of tralee :pac:

    anyway sign me up!
    did she enjoy being entered? :D


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    #38
    ruthiedv
    Closed Accounts Posts: 107 ✭✭ruthiedv


    143949012_dfd86fc811.jpg?v=0


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    #39
    John Mason
    Hosted Moderators Posts: 10,661 ✭✭✭✭John Mason


    Hi

    I would like an escort for this weekend, please, as my usual will be away and i wont know what to do with myself.

    I like making rasher sandwiches and fetching beer

    thank you


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    #40
    Slow Motion
    Closed Accounts Posts: 3,831 ✭✭✭Slow Motion


    irishbird wrote: »
    Hi

    I would like an escort for this weekend, please, as my usual will be away and i wont know what to do with myself.

    I like making rasher sandwiches and fetching beer

    thank you

    Ahh! Our first customer, well Miss I see you already have the two core competencies covered, do you have any specific requirements? Specialist sports knowledge, some of our escorts have a limited interest. We could throw in a bout of crotch scratching for a special introductory price!


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    #41
    John Mason
    Hosted Moderators Posts: 10,661 ✭✭✭✭John Mason


    Slow Motion wrote: »
    Ahh! Our first customer, well Miss I see you already have the two core competencies covered, do you have any specific requirements? Specialist sports knowledge, some of our escorts have a limited interest. We could throw in a bout of crotch scratching for a special introductory price!

    that sounds good and probably an all consuming interest in football to the point where i cease to exist would be good (or even some other intane sporting event)


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    #42
    Slow Motion
    Closed Accounts Posts: 3,831 ✭✭✭Slow Motion


    irishbird wrote: »
    that sounds good and probably an all consuming interest in football to the point where i cease to exist would be good (or even some other intane sporting event)

    I don't think that would be possible, passion for food and beer are the pre-eminent requisits for our escorts, sport while high on some agendas must come behind these, otherwise such and individual would not be able to claim the status of BGRH escort and would meerely be an escort and liable to be confused with a car!


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    #43
    LostinBlanch
    Registered Users Posts: 2,908 ✭✭✭LostinBlanch


    Jaysus Slomo,

    for the first customer you could at least throw in the farting and belching for free!


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    #44
    grames_bond
    Registered Users Posts: 9,820 ✭✭✭grames_bond


    LostinBlanch wrote: »
    Jaysus Slomo,

    for the first customer you could at least throw in the farting and belching for free!

    ...and free ass pats, i think that would get the word around at how professional the escorts are! thus increasing interest!


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    #45
    Slow Motion
    Closed Accounts Posts: 3,831 ✭✭✭Slow Motion


    LostinBlanch wrote: »
    Jaysus Slomo,

    for the first customer you could at least throw in the farting and belching for free!
    grames_bond wrote: »
    ...and free ass pats, i think that would get the word around at how professional the escorts are! thus increasing interest!

    At this point everything is open to negotiation!


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    #46
    The Bollox
    Closed Accounts Posts: 5,372 ✭✭✭The Bollox


    Slow Motion wrote: »
    At this point everything is open to negotiation!

    I fully agree. if you keep giving and giving then the wimmins are going to keep wanting more and more reductions. make them work for the reductions


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    #47
    DJ_Spider
    Closed Accounts Posts: 1,958 ✭✭✭DJ_Spider


    I like escorts, but I think the Mondeo has a better shape. Oh...sorry are we talking about the same sort of escort? :eek:


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    #48
    Rob_l
    Registered Users Posts: 2,905 ✭✭✭Rob_l


    grames_bond wrote: »
    ...and free ass pats, i think that would get the word around at how professional the escorts are! thus increasing interest!


    These are specialist services some of us spent years getting to the level we are at now and you want us to just give it away for free:eek::eek:


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    #49
    Slow Motion
    Closed Accounts Posts: 3,831 ✭✭✭Slow Motion


    Rob_l wrote: »
    These are specialist services some of us spent years getting to the level we are at now and you want us to just give it away for free:eek::eek:

    That's quite true, the ass pat is a very well honed and practised movement and only to be trusted to a senior brother, I couldn't allow an Escort to administer one without proper preparation and due consideration, thus the reason for the extra charge in the first place!


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    #50
    grames_bond
    Registered Users Posts: 9,820 ✭✭✭grames_bond


    Slow Motion wrote: »
    That's quite true, the ass pat is a very well honed and practised movement and only to be trusted to a senior brother, I couldn't allow an Escort to administer one without proper preparation and due consideration, thus the reason for the extra charge in the first place!

    i totally understand that, i for one have mastered the ass pat i am proud to say! but to peak up interest and to get wimmins signing up maybe the first wimmin to order gets one for free! then word will spread of how good they are!


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    #51
    Galvasean
    Registered Users Posts: 30,746 ✭✭✭✭Galvasean


    grames_bond wrote: »
    i for one have mastered the ass pat i am proud to say!

    Your experience counts for nothing here boy!

    daily23.jpg


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    #52
    Nevyn
    Closed Accounts Posts: 43,045 ✭✭✭✭Nevyn


    Ok that pic is either demeaning and misogynistic or else it's superman in a consenting erotic power exchange spanking scene.

    Either way it's not suitible for this thread or indeed this forum.


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    #53
    Slow Motion
    Closed Accounts Posts: 3,831 ✭✭✭Slow Motion


    Thaedydal wrote: »
    Ok that pic is either demeaning and misogynistic or else it's superman in a consenting erotic power exchange spanking scene.

    Either way it's not suitible for this thread or indeed this forum.

    QFT! An ass pat is not a spanking! Our Escorts do not provide that kind of service! I can just imagine this thread showing up in a S&M google search:p


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    #54
    Rob_l
    Registered Users Posts: 2,905 ✭✭✭Rob_l


    Slow Motion wrote: »
    QFT! An ass pat is not a spanking! Our Escorts do not provide that kind of service! I can just imagine this thread showing up in a S&M google search:p


    Nonsense it is nothing more than a firm pat on the ass


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    #55
    Slow Motion
    Closed Accounts Posts: 3,831 ✭✭✭Slow Motion


    Not really, one will get you a giggle and maybe a slap, the other will get you a restraining order and maybe a prison term!


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    #56
    Nerin
    Registered Users Posts: 10,523 ✭✭✭✭Nerin


    Ahem
    *taps foot*
    Thaed, why was i not informed this got the go ahead.
    i was to be part of the pet service!


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    #57
    monkeyfudge
    Registered Users Posts: 23,216 ✭✭✭✭monkeyfudge


    Galvasean wrote: »
    Your experience counts for nothing here boy!

    daily23.jpg

    It's always the ass with Lois.

    loisbackentrance5zq.jpg


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    #58
    Santa Claus
    Registered Users Posts: 2,699 ✭✭✭Santa Claus


    Thaedydal wrote: »
    Either way it's not suitible for this thread or indeed this forum.

    Since when was anything in BGRH "suitable" ? We are the rebels without a clue of boards !


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    #59
    Looby_Loo
    Registered Users Posts: 414 ✭✭Looby_Loo


    Ahem,
    Any of the Brothers available for some light DIY? :)
    I will of course be willing to pay triple the standard rate to compensate for the effort. :D


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    #60
    Slow Motion
    Closed Accounts Posts: 3,831 ✭✭✭Slow Motion


    Looby_Loo wrote: »
    Ahem,
    Any of the Brothers available for some light DIY? :)
    I will of course be willing to pay triple the standard rate to compensate for the effort. :D

    I think you might have the wrong end of the stick, unless by DIY you mean drinking the beers you hand him!


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    #61
    Looby_Loo
    Registered Users Posts: 414 ✭✭Looby_Loo


    But how bout bribery with many beers????
    And...........................................cake???


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