Young girls paying to lose their virginity

Xavi6 · 30-10-2008 2:11am #1

Hi folks,

Came across a story this morning that I was quite frankly very surprised at -

http://news.ninemsn.com.au/article.aspx?id=657558

Young female virgins pay for sex

11:00 AEST Thu Oct 30 2008

Young female virgins are increasingly turning to male prostitutes for a "clinical" way of dealing with their first sexual experience, Australian sex industry workers have revealed to ninemsn.

The women, mainly aged in their late teens to early 20s, are paying upwards of $250 per hour for male "escorts" to deflower them.

Global Escorts owner and founder Berney told ninemsn his Melbourne agency had noticed an increase in the number of female virgins seeking their escort services over the last five years.

"They're younger ladies who tell us they're virgins … they want to do it gently and clinically," he said.

Vivian from the Sydney-based Escorts for Women — whose male escorts charge from $250 to $500 per hour for "private time" — said she had also noticed the trend.

"Some of our clients are virgins," she told ninemsn.

"I'd say they are generally aged in their early 20s and are women who want their first time to be special, or to be taught how to make love."

But things don't always run smoothly despite the young women paying big money for the experience, Berney admits.

Some of Berney's escorts had told him horror stories of virgins who had been unprepared for the reality of what is involved.

"It can be hard when the young lady is so inexperienced … they don't know where to start and can't handle it," he said.

"Psychologically it's a problem for them and they just clamp up."

And while some Australian women are paying to lose their virginity, some women overseas are cashing in on theirs.

Italian showgirl and bikini model Raffella Fico announced plans in September to sell her virginity — for $1.8 million.

The 20-year-old told an Italian magazine she was offering herself up for the cash to help pay for acting classes.

Natalie Dylan, a 22-year-old college student, is currently in the process of auctioning her virginity through a Nevada brothel, to pay for her tuition fees.

Berney, whose Global Escorts Agency was the first business in Australia to offer sexual services for women when it opened 20 years ago, said it is still very much a niche market.

"Compared to Europe, the industry in Australia is tiny, but it's growing as society's attitude towards sex and women changes," he said.

The type of women seeking out male prostitutes were "many and varied", Berney said.

"We have clients who are professional white collar ladies and some are your average run-of-the-mill working girl."

"Some ladies will basically save up to do it once a month, or there are others who are about to get married and want to have one last fling.

"Then there are women who have a fear of going out there and meeting the wrong man, perhaps because they have been treated badly on the first occasion."

I was going to post it in AH but felt I might get more intellectual responses than "w00t! every guy's dream!" and "Sign me up!".

Basically just wondering what you think. Of course the first time can be daunting but would you ever have resorted to this? Is there method in their madness?

Nuravictus · 30-10-2008 2:19am

Sign me up !

yayamark · 30-10-2008 2:19am

Opens bag of Taytos and dives behind couch waiting for xavi to be shredded!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

zuroph · 30-10-2008 2:21am

tbh, this showed up on the front page and i was over here like...well, me.

Acacia · 30-10-2008 2:24am

That's a bit bizarre to be honest. If you waited for the right person, then the first time you have sex shouldn't be a big deal, and certainly not something to be dealt with 'clinically'. To each their own, but surely they would be more comfortable with a guy they know rather than a random stranger? People make too big a deal out of losing their virginity- it's just sex.

orestes · 30-10-2008 2:28am

I can see a certain amount of logic to it tbh and I can see where they're coming from.

There is a lot of pressure on women these days to be sexually confident. This seems like a very pragmatic and practical approach for some people who would like to get the nerves/worries about their first time/couple of times out of the way so that they feel comfortable and confident when it comes to forming real sexual relationships and having their first emotionally involved sexual encounters. Without sounding crass, it's like getting a few private lessons on something before going on to try it out in public, like getting a few dance lessons before you start going out to clubs.

Not everyone is a sentimental type

Curlypinkie · 30-10-2008 11:01am

""Some of Berney's escorts had told him horror stories of virgins who had been unprepared for the reality of what is involved. ""

These are women in their 20ies

JaneyMc · 30-10-2008 11:27am

I have heard a fair amount of horror stories concerning girls losing their virginity over the years to understand why this might be an option for some people. For most losing their virginity is a very uncomfortable experience, and these guys won't be in it for their own sexual pleasure, they're there to do the job, so hopefully there are elements to it that would be easier. It's a bit sad that the word clinical is mentioned, sex is supposed to be about a connection between two people, abd they make it sound like a procedure in a hospital.

It wouldn't be my style, the only thing I would be able to think about would be how many people has this man put his thing in before me. I didn't lose mine until I was with someone I trusted and cared for and I certainly would never pay to be deflowered if the right person had not come along.

citytillidie · 30-10-2008 11:45am

Maybe its just like the guys who go to Amtserdam to do the same.

Trinity · 30-10-2008 11:48am

I'd pay to have mine back.

Dudess · 30-10-2008 12:01pm

Curlypinkie wrote: »

These are women in their 20ies

Early 20s - and yes, plenty of girls that age are virgins. No offence but it's views like yours (they "should" be experienced at their age) that puts them under enough pressure to resort to drastic action like this in the first place.

Acacia wrote: »

That's a bit bizarre to be honest. If you waited for the right person, then the first time you have sex shouldn't be a big deal, and certainly not something to be dealt with 'clinically'. To each their own, but surely they would be more comfortable with a guy they know rather than a random stranger? People make too big a deal out of losing their virginity- it's just sex.

Where's the guarantee you'll meet "the right person" though? I agree people shouldn't feel under so much pressure sexually, but I can understand the mindset of someone who's sick of waiting and just wants to experience it - if that's with a "professional lover", all the better.

Xavi6 wrote: »

I was going to post it in AH but felt I might get more intellectual responses than "w00t! every guy's dream!" and "Sign me up!"

Fair play to you. It took me seven months of moderating the place to realise that...

Chucky the tree · 30-10-2008 12:13pm

Dudess wrote: »

Early 20s - and yes, plenty of girls that age are virgins. No offence but it's views like yours (they "should" be experienced at their age) that puts them under enough pressure to resort to drastic action like this in the first place.

The article seemed to suggest some girls didnt know excactly what was going to happen. As in, chap wipes it out and the girl is like "ehm, where does he expect me to put that?

" kind of way.

I think that's what curly was getting at, they dont have to be Jenna jamesison but atleast know where the bloody thing goes...

Curlypinkie · 30-10-2008 12:17pm

Dudess wrote: »

Early 20s - and yes, plenty of girls that age are virgins. No offence but it's views like yours (they "should" be experienced at their age) that puts them under enough pressure to resort to drastic action like this in the first place.

I'm not saying they should not be virgins. I was surprised by the statement they didn't know what s€xual intercourse was about. Unless you're living without any connection to the media (I'm thinking Amish here) there is no way a girl in her early 20ies wouldn't know the basics about birds and bees.

Chucky the Tree beat me to it

WindSock · 30-10-2008 12:18pm

Acacia wrote: »

People make too big a deal out of losing their virginity- it's just sex.

I agree with that bit but I can also see why some women would like to have their first experience to be from someone who is experienced as well though. They might want to just get it out of the way and not want to have to accost a random stranger in a club or whatever.

Dudess · 30-10-2008 12:21pm

Chucky the tree wrote: »

The article seemed to suggest some girls didnt know excactly what was going to happen. As in, chap wipes it out and the girl is like "ehm, where does he expect me to put that? " kind of way.

I think that's what curly was getting at, they dont have to be Jenna jamesison but atleast know where the bloody thing goes...

Curlypinkie wrote: »

I'm not saying they should not be virgins. I was surprised by the statement they didn't know what s€xual intercourse was about. Unless you're living without any connection to the media (I'm thinking Amish here) there is no way a girl in her early 20ies wouldn't know the basics about birds and bees.

Ah I see - sorry. The way I read it was: not that they don't know what sexual intercourse involves but that they're unprepared for stuff like the need for lube/foreplay, the fact that "tightening up" due to nervousness is gonna prevent penetration from being accommodated, the soreness/discomfort that often accompanies the first time etc...

Mr. Presentable · 30-10-2008 12:22pm

Call me cynical, but an escort agency I never heard of is now known worldwide. Reminds me of the "Loony Tile Shop Owner" in Terenure during the world cup, who's best mate happens to work for the Star newspaper. Headline news for his promotion, front page at least twice.

Curlypinkie · 30-10-2008 12:23pm

Dudess wrote: »

Ah I see - sorry. The way I read it was: not that they don't know what sexual intercourse involves but that they're unprepared for stuff like the need for lube/foreplay, the fact that "tightening up" due to nervousness is gonna prevent penetration from being accommodated, the soreness/discomfort that often accompanies the first time etc...

Yeah, for all that craic- no pun intended - I would have loved to pay someone who actually had a clue what they were doing. Wish I had the option (and the guts) to do it way back then:rolleyes:

g'em · 30-10-2008 12:32pm

Here's the thing though; let's say you do decide to go to an escort, are you setting yourself very high (and possibly unrealistic) expectations for future sexual encounters??

Dragan · 30-10-2008 12:39pm

g'em wrote: »

Here's the thing though; let's say you do decide to go to an escort, are you setting yourself very high (and possibly unrealistic) expectations for future sexual encounters??

This is making the assumption that the escort is going to be a great lay, which may not be the case. Lately i have really started to believe in sexual compatability. Someone who might be a great lay for one person might be a bad lay for another, nothing to do with your "ability" but more your likes and dislikes, the biomechanics behind it all etc.

I think maybe our first time out we have no expectations, and you sure as hell haven't found your likes and dislikes yet, or what really turns you on.

Sexual maturity is a great thing that way, as you get a bit older and lean more about yourself , in my opinion, sex gets better.

I mean, would we apply the assumption that all prostitutes are great in bed?

Not really.

I guess there is the case though that there should be no crappy lines, no awkward requests, nothing coming up in the mix of sex that you would not want or be interested in, so i guess that way then yes, it could lead to some false expectations.

Hiring and escort etc makes it all about the woman.

Sex is about two people.

Galvasean · 30-10-2008 12:44pm

Trinity1 wrote: »

I'd pay to have mine back.

Look no further.

JaneyMc · 30-10-2008 12:52pm

Believing in Jesus Christ does not bring back one's virginity! Either does making the decision to stay abstinant until after marriage if you have already done the dirty deed.

Galvasean · 30-10-2008 12:55pm

JaneyMc wrote: »

Believing in Jesus Christ does not bring back one's virginity! Either does making the decision to stay abstinant until after marriage if you have already done the dirty deed.

Tell them that, they reckon you can 'buy it back'.

JaneyMc · 30-10-2008 12:56pm

Then there is the method of having it done surgically... :rolleyes:

WindSock · 30-10-2008 12:58pm

Galvasean wrote: »

Look no further.

I thought that link was going to be about Hymen restitching.

Edit: oops JaneyMc beat me to it.

Nevyn · 30-10-2008 1:14pm

Dudess wrote: »

Ah I see - sorry. The way I read it was: not that they don't know what sexual intercourse involves but that they're unprepared for stuff like the need for lube/foreplay, the fact that "tightening up" due to nervousness is gonna prevent penetration from being accommodated, the soreness/discomfort that often accompanies the first time etc...

There is a big difference between reading about what happens and experiencing what happens, if it is so clinical and there is not enough passion it can be very unnerving and they just will not be responsive enough in the right way.

JaneyMc · 30-10-2008 1:19pm

WindSock wrote: »

I thought that link was going to be about Hymen restitching.

Edit: oops JaneyMc beat me to it.

I find it ridiculous though! Why bother? Your virginity is still gone! The same nervousness won't be there, you will have some idea of what is going to happen and how to do it. The only thing different is the pain. Some people have more sense than money.

Galvasean · 30-10-2008 1:26pm

That restitching thing is weird. Apparently a lot of guys like breaking it. Can't see why. As far as I'm concerned it's a nasty experience for both parties.

LolaDub · 30-10-2008 1:27pm

Thaedydal wrote: »

There is a big difference between reading about what happens and experiencing what happens, if it is so clinical and there is not enough passion it can be very unnerving and they just will not be responsive enough in the right way.

I read this the way dudess did and would have to agree with thaed also. I think the article meant they weren't emotionally prepared for what happened. I'm sure a few people have stories about having sex and for whatever reasons being upset. I'd say the reality of being with a prostitute might hit when you're doing the deed and that could be very upsetting.

I think its a particularly sad article, its like the pressue of being sexualy competant has taken away all emotion and natural attraction for these girls. Being with someone the first time and knowing they have o feeling for you, when they're holding you its about money not about you, personally i would find that very empty.

WindSock · 30-10-2008 1:32pm

JaneyMc wrote: »

I find it ridiculous though! Why bother? Your virginity is still gone! The same nervousness won't be there, you will have some idea of what is going to happen and how to do it. The only thing different is the pain. Some people have more sense than money.

I think it's mostly done by those that still live in societies where virgin wives are to be expected.
Although its probably done by those aswell that want to be born again virgins or some other such nonsense.

Nevyn · 30-10-2008 1:32pm

Even if you have your hymen broken and have used dildos it is still not the sames as the feeling of a man being inside you and moving in and out and around. The pressure of them, the touch, the sight and smell and the noises that sex makes can be very strange.

There is in the usa a growning number of what are called body workers.
They are professional sexual surrogates who work with people who have sexual dysfunction
( which in some cases is from abuse/rape ) but it is done as treatment and prescribed by a therapist.

Dudess · 30-10-2008 1:36pm

LolaDub wrote: »

I read this the way dudess did and would have to agree with thaed also. I think the article meant they weren't emotionally prepared for what happened. I'm sure a few people have stories about having sex and for whatever reasons being upset. I'd say the reality of being with a prostitute might hit when you're doing the deed and that could be very upsetting.

I think its a particularly sad article, its like the pressue of being sexualy competant has taken away all emotion and natural attraction for these girls. Being with someone the first time and knowing they have o feeling for you, when they're holding you its about money not about you, personally i would find that very empty.

I agree Lola, but you know what? Sex with someone you're in love with... well it's too amazing for words for those of us who have been lucky enough to experience it... but it doesn't happen for everyone. We're conditioned to believe it's an inevitability but it isn't. So then, you go for the nowhere-near-as-wonderful option - e.g. this one - and while it's nothing like being with someone whom you're mad about, at least you're getting to experience sex... and yes, finding out what all the fuss is about.

WindSock · 30-10-2008 1:40pm

Thaedydal wrote: »

Even if you have your hymen broken and have used dildos it is still not the sames as the feeling of a man being inside you and moving in and out and around. The pressure of them, the touch, the sight and smell and the noises that sex makes can be very strange.

Plus a dildo doesnt wipe itself on the curtain when it's done

LolaDub · 30-10-2008 1:45pm

Dudess wrote: »

I agree Lola, but you know what? Sex with someone you're in love with... well it's too amazing for words for those of us who have been lucky enough to experience it... but it doesn't happen for everyone. We're conditioned to believe it's an inevitability but it isn't. So then, you go for the nowhere-near-as-wonderful option - e.g. this one - and while it's nothing like being with someone whom you're mad about, at least you're getting to experience sex... and yes, finding out what all the fuss is about.

Thanks dudess. I wasn't just discussing love, just some emotion and attraction. I think nearly everyone would have been with someone they had feelings for at some stage and its a wonderful experience, being with someone you love is mind blowing but you're right that doesn't happen for everyone. Just because of that i don't think its enough to give up altogether

JaneyMc · 30-10-2008 1:47pm

Thaedydal wrote: »

Even if you have your hymen broken and have used dildos it is still not the sames as the feeling of a man being inside you and moving in and out and around. The pressure of them, the touch, the sight and smell and the noises that sex makes can be very strange.

There is in the usa a growning number of what are called body workers.
They are professional sexual surrogates who work with people who have sexual dysfunction
( which in some cases is from abuse/rape ) but it is done as treatment and prescribed by a therapist.

I never considered the fact they might not have had sex and their hymens had broken in other ways.

So these sexual surrogates, they are legal sex workers then? Do they have full intercourse if that's what the client requires to help get over what ever issues they might have?

Dudess · 30-10-2008 1:52pm

Young women (late teens, 20s)... it's a shame all right. However, a more mature woman - e.g. in her 30s/40s - it's not a bad idea because the pressure they're under must be terrible (real or imagined). Channel 4 showed a documentary on people who are virgins late in life and one of them was a woman in her 40s who paid an escort, and she seemed delighted with the decision and how things went.

Dragan · 30-10-2008 1:57pm

WindSock wrote: »

Plus a dildo doesnt wipe itself on the curtain when it's done

Neither does a penis.

Dudess · 30-10-2008 2:17pm

There's a thread near this one called "Remove stains". Now both threads are inextricably caught up with each other in my mind...

Oryx · 30-10-2008 2:18pm

Dragan wrote: »

Neither does a penis.

I think most of the men who are slovenly enough to wipe themselves in the furnishings dont bother going as far as the window. The sheets do just fine. And yeah, dont accuse the poor ol penis. I blame the owners, personally.

Im not really qualified to comment here. Me and my virginity parted company so many years ago that abstinence was taught as birth control in schools and the world wide web was science fiction. At the time I suppose I saw it as a precious commodity, something that should be revoked with a lot of ceremony. When the reality is that its awkward, painful and often a bloody mess. Having it built up as something wonderful means that how it actually happens can make you feel like a failure. But to get rid of it as a financial transaction is a failure to me too.

The importance of the first time would be for me that youre with someone you chose because you liked them, ideally. Someone you have a rapport with so you can relax. It may not be wonderful, but at least it was real. I just hate the idea that this, like everything else in the world, is becoming less about emotion and joy and more about ticking a box and saying: done. It took me a lot of time to learn that the best sex was not just about physical gymnastics, but the whole mind and body experience. Something like this puts the poor girls who do it waaaaaaaaaaay back down the line in terms of learning that. To use the dance analogy, you can learn the steps, but until you begin to feel and enjoy it with your partner, youre only halfway there.

Macha · 30-10-2008 3:00pm

It's very sad that girls are feeling this way - that their virginity is some sort of burden. I had heard of young men doing this but never young women. I mentioned in an earlier thread about prostitution that many male clients have issues with responsibility and it appears to be the same thing here.

The girls are feeling too much responsibility/pressure to please the other partner and be some sort of sex vixen so they go to a person who is paid not to put that pressure on them. As Dragan pointed out, sex is about 2 people and going to a prostitute means you don't have to worry about the other person.

Galvasean · 30-10-2008 3:02pm

Dudess wrote: »

There's a thread near this one called "Remove stains".

Ive avoided that thread. is it actually about... THAT? :eek:

Dragan · 30-10-2008 3:16pm

taconnol wrote: »

It's very sad that girls are feeling this way - that their virginity is some sort of burden. I had heard of young men doing this but never young women. I mentioned in an earlier thread about prostitution that many male clients have issues with responsibility and it appears to be the same thing here.

The girls are feeling too much responsibility/pressure to please the other partner and be some sort of sex vixen so they go to a person who is paid not to put that pressure on them. As Dragan pointed out, sex is about 2 people and going to a prostitute means you don't have to worry about the other person.

Actually, in Guam, it is common practice for girls to hire the services of a "wandering salesman" for want of a better word, as virgin brides are not desirable.

So it is rather predominant in some cultures for various reasons.

Gyalist · 30-10-2008 3:27pm

Interesting discussion, but I'm very sceptical of the original article itself. Sounds very much like a clever marketing stunt. free publicity for the businesses concerned and a potentially new market and revenue stream for them to tap into.

Acacia · 30-10-2008 3:46pm

Dudess wrote: »

Where's the guarantee you'll meet "the right person" though? I agree people shouldn't feel under so much pressure sexually, but I can understand the mindset of someone who's sick of waiting and just wants to experience it - if that's with a "professional lover", all the better.

Not necessarily the 'right person' as in the love of their life or 'the one', but just somebody they feel comfortable with. I just find paying somebody to do it a bit cold, personally.

I think that people put too much of emphasis on sex these days, like it's a competition to see who can lose their virginity first and I think this contributes to the mindset of wanting to 'get it over with'. I can understand your point, and where the girls are coming from, it's just not for me, I guess.

Dudess · 30-10-2008 3:51pm

Galvasean wrote: »

Ive avoided that thread. is it actually about... THAT? :eek:

You'd better believe it...

Latchy · 30-10-2008 4:06pm

Be intresting to see the type of guys who are available to these young girls and women .Like are they all Adonis type guys ,great looks ? .If so then it's obiously a turn on sexual thing to be enjoyed and they are no different to young men in that respect who are doing the same .But as mentioned it will be an akward and uncomfortable expierence for many .

Trinity · 30-10-2008 5:19pm

Dragan wrote: »

Neither does a penis.

Nope, only pricks do that

Trinity · 30-10-2008 5:27pm

I was just kidding bout the virginity thing. I doubt people would believe i am still a virgin when they see 2 kids hanging out of my legs. :eek:

Paying to lose it. Hmmm. I think if i was going to be that clinical about sex i would just go out and have a one night stand or a short fling with someone i didnt care about, or get myself a fcuk buddy to practice on.

I dont equate sex with love, i dont believe you have to be in love with someone to fcuk them, hell you dont even have to know their name if you are that way inclined, but in my opinion sex improves the longer you are with someone, you get to know them, their fantasies, desires, bodies, what they like what they dont You become more open, less inhibited and more adventurous. And thats not something paying to get deflowered can teach you.

Oryx · 30-10-2008 5:36pm

Imagine the queue when that crowd advertise for escorts. I wonder what prospective candidates put on their cv as education and work experience?

1995-2000 Fumbling in cinema. Light petting.
2000-2002 Logistics of shagging in cars.
2002-present Nightclub doorman and occasional stripogram.

Two year night class in Locating the clitoris is a must-have.

Although, now that I come to think of it, maybe these girls are onto something. These escorts must be smarter than the average bear.

Latchy · 30-10-2008 5:49pm

Trinity1 wrote: »

a short fling with someone i didnt care about, or get myself a fcuk buddy to practice on.

When i was younger there were plenty of fcuk buddies around .They were called slappers

Dragan · 30-10-2008 5:58pm

latchyco wrote: »

When i was younger there were plenty of fcuk buddies around .They were called slappers

And what about the guys who were with them?

Legends no doubt?:rolleyes:

Latchy · 30-10-2008 6:01pm

Dragan wrote: »

And what about the guys who were with them?

Legends no doubt?:rolleyes:

Well actually i agree, it's just some people bandy this americanism word around like ' fcuk buddies ' like ' think i'll just pop into see my fcuk buddie for a few moements ''

Young girls paying to lose their virginity

Comments