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Lets all be anxious/depressed together.

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    #4202
    Princess Peach
    Registered Users Posts: 11,698 ✭✭✭✭Princess Peach


    My energy and motivation have just been zapped lately. Tried eating better but to no avail. Just wanna sleep all the time.

    Probably would help if I got out of bed this weekend >_<


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    #4203
    flyswatter
    Closed Accounts Posts: 3,625 ✭✭✭flyswatter


    Feeling good enough these days.


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    #4204
    LegacyUser
    Registered Users Posts: 166,026 ✭✭✭✭LegacyUser


    Going unreg for this, im afraid im not brave enough to use my username. I dont know if any of this will make sense so I apologise in advance. Always feel miserable and anxious. I have recently been up and down like a yoyo. I cant even properly explain it. I just have always felt detached from things. I tend to lock myself away from the world and after periods of not having spoken to friends and acquaintances i somehow make them the enemy in my own mind. Then at the drop of a hat, then they can be ok people again if we happen to meet. Ive now played out in my mind all manner of awful scenarios where friends of theirs will come after me and my family. Ive met some great folks down through the years, but now at 33, im starting to wonder is it all worth it. That life would be much better to not know anybody. If a genie gave me one wish right now, it would be to erase me from peoples memory. To have no trace of me, get a chance to start over.

    I dont seem to be able to tell if im actually being picked on at times. I ended up having to go out and meet a few acquaintances the other night, and one of them made a comment about situation im in. Now it may have been completely innocent, but with me ive convinced it was meant maliciously. Thing is, I cant tell if people are mocking or messing with me, I act like a nervous school boy in front of these people. Its horrible, im not even sure if I have a personality at all. At 33 to admit that is quite the failure.

    Yesterday, still reeling and obsessing over that comment, I went out for a walk against my better judgement. I cant explain how I feel at those times, kind of like a sub human species that everybody I come across will look down upon me. On the path there was a large group of youths being loud and obnoxious, it frightened me so I had to end up altering my route to avoid them. So now, its another week to face, I hope to god this lifts and I can claw back some kind of normality.

    As stated above, if the above made no sense, I apologise.


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    #4205
    KyussBishop
    Closed Accounts Posts: 5,797 ✭✭✭KyussBishop


    Hey fear2012; ya I remember feeling a lot like that in school, not knowing how to interpret others comments, and overanalyzing things, being unable to tell if it was malicious or just joking (in my case, much of it was malicious, but that's not always the case).
    A lot better now thankfully, but stuff like that (coupled with other longstanding issues) crippled me socially then, and has had a lasting effect up to now.

    It's the kind of thing that, if you find it hard to interpret on your own, it really helps to get a second perspective on it; it sounds like these kind of issues plague you a lot, so seeing a counselor or psych to discuss these things with could be really beneficial, even if just to get an outside perspective.


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    #4206
    nesf
    Registered Users Posts: 27,645 ✭✭✭✭nesf


    I've a rather unusual sleep pattern at the moment. 8pm-12pm. :/


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    #4207
    Temaz
    Closed Accounts Posts: 1,758 ✭✭✭Temaz


    nesf wrote: »
    I've a rather unusual sleep pattern at the moment. 8pm-12pm. :/

    Do you take sleepers? 2 Stilnoct at night helps me drift off for a few hours at least.


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    #4208
    nesf
    Registered Users Posts: 27,645 ✭✭✭✭nesf


    Temaz wrote: »
    Do you take sleepers? 2 Stilnoct at night helps me drift off for a few hours at least.

    They don't want to give me sleepers since the sleep problems have been going on over 10 years.


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    #4209
    Temaz
    Closed Accounts Posts: 1,758 ✭✭✭Temaz


    nesf wrote: »
    They don't want to give me sleepers since the sleep problems have been going on over 10 years.

    Bummer!!!


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    #4210
    degausserxo
    Closed Accounts Posts: 1,492 ✭✭✭degausserxo


    Not doing great at the minute. Food issues seem to be magnified tenfold. Having family members constantly comment on it isn't helping either.


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    #4211
    stupidusername
    Closed Accounts Posts: 14,762 ✭✭✭✭stupidusername


    I'm so so tired of this. i'm tired of being me. i'm tired of thinking things all the time. i need a break. some sort of relief. and i never get it. i mess things up with everyone because of my problems. this is another person i'm going to make hate me.


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    #4212
    midlandsmissus
    Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 3,838 ✭✭✭midlandsmissus


    Really bad day , I'm so tired of being mentally ill, I'm exhausted. It's exhausting, isolating. I don't know if I can live this life.


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    #4213
    midlandsmissus
    Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 3,838 ✭✭✭midlandsmissus


    And also I was absolutely horrible to some-one last weekend. I was abused last year, and it made me in turn be horrible to some-one at the weekend. I couldn't bare him near me and I treated him like **** because I wanted him to go away. So now the abused has become the abusee, so now I feel terrible about that too.


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    #4214
    moe_sizlak
    Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 883 ✭✭✭moe_sizlak


    stupidusername wrote: »
    I'm so so tired of this. i'm tired of being me. i'm tired of thinking things all the time. i need a break. some sort of relief. and i never get it. i mess things up with everyone because of my problems. this is another person i'm going to make hate me.

    was thier a time when you saw yourself very differently ?


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    #4215
    stupidusername
    Closed Accounts Posts: 14,762 ✭✭✭✭stupidusername


    moe_sizlak wrote: »
    was thier a time when you saw yourself very differently ?

    you mean when my self esteem wasn't a problem? nope.


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    #4216
    cloud493
    Closed Accounts Posts: 11,835 ✭✭✭✭cloud493


    I don't really know what to say. I could say 'it'll get better' but I don't know that, so :(


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    #4217
    stupidusername
    Closed Accounts Posts: 14,762 ✭✭✭✭stupidusername


    I know what you mean cloud. don't worry about it.

    i'm going to make him hate me and i'll be on my own again. I just want to switch off


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    #4218
    midlandsmissus
    Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 3,838 ✭✭✭midlandsmissus


    cloud493 wrote: »
    I don't really know what to say. I could say 'it'll get better' but I don't know that, so :(

    Say something to me. Anything nice, anything at all. I'd appreciate it. I'm in a bad place tonight.


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    #4219
    cloud493
    Closed Accounts Posts: 11,835 ✭✭✭✭cloud493


    If he is who you're meant to be, really, he'll understand. You won't be able to push him away.


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    #4220
    midlandsmissus
    Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 3,838 ✭✭✭midlandsmissus


    cloud493 wrote: »
    If he is who you're meant to be, really, he'll understand. You won't be able to push him away.

    Was that for Stupidusername? Sigh, not at you, at the world. It's........not a great night.


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    #4221
    cloud493
    Closed Accounts Posts: 11,835 ✭✭✭✭cloud493


    midlandsmissus wrote: »
    Was that for Stupidusername? Sigh, not at you, at the world. It's........not a great night.

    It was. What's up?(midlandmissus)


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    #4222
    stupidusername
    Closed Accounts Posts: 14,762 ✭✭✭✭stupidusername


    cloud493 wrote: »
    If he is who you're meant to be, really, he'll understand. You won't be able to push him away.

    don't really believe in all that. i'd push a saint to the brink


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    #4223
    midlandsmissus
    Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 3,838 ✭✭✭midlandsmissus


    cloud493 wrote: »
    It was. What's up?(midlandmissus)

    I'm sad. To sum it up. Can't get over stuff that has happened in the past. How do you cope?


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    #4224
    cloud493
    Closed Accounts Posts: 11,835 ✭✭✭✭cloud493


    I'm not really over it :3 happened.. 5 years or so ago, and I still remember it like it was yesterday :/ I hurt myself. Thats how I cope. Not advised, to be honest. And hope, that better days will come.

    @stupudusername - I don't know :( But for better and worse, and all that.


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    #4225
    midlandsmissus
    Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 3,838 ✭✭✭midlandsmissus


    cloud493 wrote: »
    I'm not really over it :3 happened.. 5 years or so ago, and I still remember it like it was yesterday :/ I hurt myself. Thats how I cope. Not advised, to be honest. And hope, that better days will come.

    @stupudusername - I don't know :( But for better and worse, and all that.

    That's how I feel, it's like its imprinted in your DNA. It's so hard sometimes? I don't know what to do.


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    #4226
    cloud493
    Closed Accounts Posts: 11,835 ✭✭✭✭cloud493


    It is a part of you, effectively. its very difficult to just.. forget about. The highest thing to aspire to, so i've been told, is to get used to it. Then it doesn't hurt as much.


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    #4227
    howsyourtusk
    Closed Accounts Posts: 1,005 ✭✭✭howsyourtusk


    I cope by just talking and talking and talking about it until I've poured everything out and cried and feel relieved. Then it builds back up again and I repeat. It's the only thing that works for me!


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    #4228
    Seren_
    Closed Accounts Posts: 4,810 ✭✭✭Seren_


    You guys are amazing for managing to still be here after all you've been through, always remember that.

    *hugs*

    I feel like crap and want to stay in bed forever and never wake up.


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    #4229
    cloud493
    Closed Accounts Posts: 11,835 ✭✭✭✭cloud493


    Your Text Here wrote: »
    You guys are amazing for managing to still be here after all you've been through, always remember that.

    *hugs*

    I feel like crap and want to stay in bed forever and never wake up.

    What's up your text here? *Big hug*


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    #4230
    Seren_
    Closed Accounts Posts: 4,810 ✭✭✭Seren_


    cloud493 wrote: »
    What's up your text here? *Big hug*
    I don't even know cloud :( that's the worst bit, because if I knew I could try change it.


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    #4231
    howsyourtusk
    Closed Accounts Posts: 1,005 ✭✭✭howsyourtusk


    Your Text Here wrote: »
    You guys are amazing for managing to still be here after all you've been through, always remember that.

    *hugs*

    I feel like crap and want to stay in bed forever and never wake up.

    Know I'm always here for the chats. Never an imposition :)


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