LexieOnRale wrote: » What, so most relationships don't involve doing something nice for the other person? Your oh doesn't buy presents, bring you away for weekends/holidays? Doesn't take you out to dinner? Doesn't bring home your favourite wine if he knows your having a bad day?
LexieOnRale wrote: » It's not. If I treat him it's because I love him and he makes me happy and if I see something that he'll love, I'll get it because he means a lot to me. Yeah, sometimes that leads to sex because it's a "close" moment.
mhge wrote: » OK so I don't know what your previous posts on rewarding him with sex for gifts were about but I guess there's no point...
LexieOnRale wrote: » It's not rewarding him specifically for gifts, but the chances of having sex are higher when he's being really nice.
Speedwell wrote: » Women do like sex for its own sake, ffs. If my husband had to buy stuff for me every time he wanted sex, he'd be fed up with me by now and gone. There are times when men aren't in the mood, either. I don't have to buy stuff for him to make him feel valued. When we have sex, it's because we want mutual intimacy and mutual pleasure. I'd consider a "transactional" marriage as dysfunctional as a "transactional" friendship ("I'll be your friend if you give me stuff"). This one-sided "I let him touch me because he buys me things"... well, it's a good thing the purchase of sex is currently legal, that's all I have to say about it.
pablomakaveli wrote: » I think it should be legal. Criminalizing it just leads to wasting Garda time and resources stopping prostitutes who are doing it willingly when they could be using that time to help the ones who are genuinely being coerced. Theres also an element of sexism at play as people who want to have it criminalized seem to think (mostly unintentionally) that women need to be protected from themselves. That if they decide to be a prostitute that they are being coerced or forced to do it. They dont seem to grasp that some women might enjoy it. And yes some of them might be doing it just for money but at the end of the day they're adults. They can make their own choices. It may not always be the right one for them but thats life. The only time the law should be sticking its nose is when women are being forced.
pablomakaveli wrote: » I think it should be legal. Criminalizing it just leads to wasting Garda time and resources stopping prostitutes who are doing it willingly when they could be using that time to help the ones who are genuinely being coerced.Theres also an element of sexism at play as people who want to have it criminalized seem to think (mostly unintentionally) that women need to be protected from themselves. That if they decide to be a prostitute that they are being coerced or forced to do it. They dont seem to grasp that some women might enjoy it. And yes some of them might be doing it just for money but at the end of the day they're adults. They can make their own choices. It may not always be the right one for them but thats life. The only time the law should be sticking its nose is when women are being forced.
melissak wrote: » There are many kinds of force though, forced by poverty addiction etc that are not as obvious as a big baddie pimp in the shadows.
One eyed Jack wrote: » Where's the element of sexism in advocating that sex work should not be facilitated by the State? That applies to both men and women.
Deleted User wrote: » But...isn't it legal here?
HensVassal wrote: » Is prostitution legal in Ireland?
pablomakaveli wrote: » Why not have it facilitated by the state? Safe working environments for prostitutes, taxable revenue, protection for prostitutes and freeing up the gardai to focus solely on helping trafficked and coerced prostitutes.
And lets be honest male prostitutes are generally an afterthought if that in these debates.Most of the focus is on female prostitutes. I dont ever recall Ruhama or the government give any attention to male prostitutes.
exiztone wrote: » I suggest you watch this interview with Maggie McNeill on the matter. She explains more eloquently than I could about the elements at play when removing agency from women under the guise of protecting them. A lot of this has to do with anachronistic social attitudes regarding sexuality and women.
One eyed Jack wrote: » Because the State should be investing it's resources in education and employment opportunities for people rather than wasting it's resources on facilitating exploitation and indignity.
And they shouldn't be. You may not recall attention being given to male sex workers, but that doesn't mean that they're forgotten about by everyone involved in the politics of sex work. It simply means that most of these political lobby groups give male sex workers a token nod, like a sentence or two at the end of a paragraph all about the "rights" of sex workers (usually assumed to be exclusively women, Amnesty International for example).
pablomakaveli wrote: » Well first of all if its banned you still have resources going into enforcing that ban so that irrelevant. The second part of that line is your opinion only and says more about your attitude to sex and selling it. Thats not a good basis for basing a law on. We should be basing the law on whats best for the prostitutes rather than trying to avoid offending the morals of a subset of people. You're right but they are still forgotten a lot of the time. Lets face it the issue for a lot of people that the idea of a woman having sex for money is repugnant for some and thats why they want it banned. The idea of a man doing it isnt as bad so there's less focus on male prostitutes. Which ties in with the "women need protection from themselves" way of thinking.
gilberto_eire wrote: » Like anything that isn't morally wrong or detrimental to society.... It should be legal and regulated to take it out of the hands of the traffickers and pimps. But common sense usually takes a back seat when it comes to this kind of thing.
esforum wrote: » Common sense dictates that some degree of illegal activity will always be associated with prostitution. Se slaves arent being paid a working weeks wages, regulating wontn stop criminals from exploiting people. Then there will be people who want to use a prostitute in a manner that most people would find vile and wrong, again they will pay criminals or junkines to facilitate their requests.
mynameis905 wrote: » No it doesn't. Stupid, regressive laws based on outdated religious mores ensure that prostitution is associated with criminality. Allow for full legalisation and you take it out of the hands of criminals. The state has absolutely no business interfering in sexual activity between consenting adults. None.
pablomakaveli wrote: » Well first of all if its banned you still have resources going into enforcing that ban so that irrelevant.
The second part of that line is your opinion only and says more about your attitude to sex and selling it.
Thats not a good basis for basing a law on. We should be basing the law on whats best for the prostitutes rather than trying to avoid offending the morals of a subset of people.
You're right but they are still forgotten a lot of the time. Lets face it the issue for a lot of people that the idea of a woman having sex for money is repugnant for some and thats why they want it banned. The idea of a man doing it isnt as bad so there's less focus on male prostitutes. Which ties in with the "women need protection from themselves" way of thinking.
melissak wrote: » No. Basing the laws on "what's best for prostitutes" is also selectively suiting "a subset of people's morals". We base laws here on the common good. That is what jack is advocating Imo regarding preventing exploitation. What's best for crack dealers also then? As I see it anything you do that harms no-one else is your own business. But that is not the case if we have factors that lead to exploitation within an industry being funded by the state to suit the people who make money from the industry,in any industry, ever this is unacceptable.
melissak wrote: » If you consider looking at playboy the same as actual sex it is the same.
pablomakaveli wrote: » Banning it suits the morals of those who finds it distasteful even though it has no direct impact on them. What happens between two or more consenting adults is no one elses business.
The "common good" is having a safe regulated system for people to sell or buy sex because whether its illegal or not it will still be there regardless and it will have little bearing on those being exploited.
You mention the sale of drugs and while its not crack (which is highly addictive and can really damage somones health), marijuana has been legalized around the world which has taken control of that drug from criminals, brought in tax revenues from sales and made things safer. Its actually a good parallel to legalizing prostitution.