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Books to avoid like a bookworm on a diet

BossArky

We have threads for:

- 10 books to read before death
- books we are currently reading
- general book threads and queries.

How about a thread which highlights books to be avoided at all costs? - i.e. waste of reading time, no educational value, biased, waste of ink, paper and some poor writers nerves.

Of course, most books no matter how bad teach us something.... but there must be a few gems out there ready to clobber the unwary reader into an early snooze.

Try to give a brief desciption of why you want the book on this list.

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josephineperry

Twilight, full moon, and all this stuff by Stephanie Meyer. I tried to read the first book because I had heard so much about it I wanted to give it a try. Awfully written, I don't get all the hype...

Kev W

Jurassic Park by Michael Crichton. So very very dull and a remarkably slow read for such a relatively short book.

DB Cooper 23

Under the Dome by Stephen King. That man doesn't know how to write an ending

Thargor

Kev W wrote: »

Jurassic Park by Michael Crichton. So very very dull and a remarkably slow read for such a relatively short book.

Sorry but Jurassic Park is definitely not a book to avoid as the thread says, its pretty much a genre classic.

Kev W

Thargor wrote: »

Sorry but Jurassic Park is definitely not a book to avoid as the thread says, its pretty much a genre classic.

But it's SO DULL.

Thargor

Would it be dull if you'd never seen the film and didnt know the plot so well because of that though? Thats not the books fault...

Kev W

Thargor wrote: »

Would it be dull if you'd never seen the film and didnt know the plot so well because of that though? Thats not the books fault...

It's actually the prose style I found tedious, not the storyline.

Lucena

DB Cooper 23 wrote: »

Under the Dome by Stephen King. That man doesn't know how to write an ending

Haven't read that particular book, but I remember reading a lot of his books as a teenager and finding the end to be the hardest part to get through, and thinking exactly the same thing as yourself.

I read the recent Kennedy book which was an exception i.e. proper ending, and it was an enjoyable read.

The One Doctor

Anything by Margaret Atwood. Both tedious and disturbing.

La_Gordy

The One Doctor wrote: »

Anything by Margaret Atwood. Both tedious and disturbing.

I'd disagree with this and say that she has some duds. The Oryx and Crake trilogy is excellent, bar the last book, which is a missed opportunity. Pish.

On this front I really enjoyed Haruki Murakami right up until IQ84. That was a very lengthy load a baws.

katydid

Dades wrote: »

I found "The Historian" by Elizabeth Kostova really turgid.
A lot of words but very little happening.

Half way through now, I only read it when I can't sleep.

Funny, I quite liked it. It was turgid in parts, I agree, but I persevered. And re-read it a couple of years later.

katydid

Anything by Frank McCourt

katydid

BossArky wrote: »

Steer well clear of Paulo Coelho's "The Valkyries", a joke of a book..

All his stuff is crap.

katydid

Merrick wrote: »

Amongst Women by John McGahern.
I had to study it for school. It led to some of the worst English classes I have ever experienced.

Totally disagree. It is a dismal book. Not great as a school text, but it is a powerful book.

Birneybau

katydid wrote: »

Totally disagree. It is a dismal book. Not great as a school text, but it is a powerful book.

boobar

I'm a big fan of the singer Morrissey, really enjoyed his Autobiography, really well written with the brilliant turn of phrase that you'd expect from this great lyricist.

However his new offering List of the Lost is like a pothole...to be avoided at all costs.

Here's a sample of what you will enjoy if you don't heed my advice

“At this, Eliza and Ezra rolled together into the one giggling snowball of full-figured copulation, screaming and shouting as they playfully bit and puled at each other in a dangerous and clamorous rollercoaster coil of sexually violent rotation with Eliza’s breasts barrel-rolled across Ezra’s howling mouth and the pained frenzy of his bulbous salutation extenuating his excitement as it whacked and smacked its way into every muscle of Eliza’s body except for the otherwise central zone.”

Kev W

boobar wrote: »

I'm a big fan of the singer Morrissey, really enjoyed his Autobiography, really well written with the brilliant turn of phrase that you'd expect from this great lyricist.

However his new offering List of the Lost is like a pothole...to be avoided at all costs.

Here's a sample of what you will enjoy if you don't heed my advice

“At this, Eliza and Ezra rolled together into the one giggling snowball of full-figured copulation, screaming and shouting as they playfully bit and puled at each other in a dangerous and clamorous rollercoaster coil of sexually violent rotation with Eliza’s breasts barrel-rolled across Ezra’s howling mouth and the pained frenzy of his bulbous salutation extenuating his excitement as it whacked and smacked its way into every muscle of Eliza’s body except for the otherwise central zone.”

Wow. I had no idea that Morrissey has never had sex.

The things you learn, eh?

Censorsh!t

I'm currently struggling through A Hand Reached Down to Guide Me by David Gates. I find all the characters annoying, pretentious arseholes, and so far all the stories appear to be pretty much the same.

ivytwine

Kev W wrote: »

Wow. I had no idea that Morrissey has never had sex.

The things you learn, eh?

I dunno about Moz but his description has certainly put me off it for a while!

Qiaonasen

The Expats by Chris Pavone.

It's not possible to write a book this bad!

The Young Wan

Us by David Nichols. I tried to get into it, I really did. But my god that story dragged for me, and I had to give up on it.

ivytwine

The Young Wan wrote: »

Us by David Nichols. I tried to get into it, I really did. But my god that story dragged for me, and I had to give up on it.

Agreed! I thought the wife was an absolute gowl tbh. Lots of things rang really false, also the descriptions of Europe never surpassed a fourth-class "what I did on my holidays" essay.

I finished it but out of annoyance!

Nemanrio

Nearly finished All is silence Manual Rivas.

Translation from Galician is very ropey in places tbh.

The book is good in parts.

Swiper the fox

The Young Wan wrote: »

Us by David Nichols. I tried to get into it, I really did. But my god that story dragged for me, and I had to give up on it.

I quit on that one as well, I did like One Day though.

heathledgerlove

Chicken Soup for the Soul. White picket fence, apple pie cooling overly-American sentimentalist drivel!

isntlee

War and Peace

When I realised that two characters I particularly disliked would probably survive the tale, book got tossed, after 800 pages.

TICKLE_ME_ELMO

isntlee wrote: »

War and Peace

When I realised that two characters I particularly disliked would probably survive the tale, book got tossed, after 800 pages.

Don't start me on W&P. F**king Pierre :mad:

telpis

any jane austen

Balf

telpis wrote: »

any jane austen

"Ah, Miss Dashwood. Would I seem forward if I sat on the toilet seat while it was still warm after you?"

Sheridan81

C.Bronte-Jane Eyre
Longeurs alert

Kipling-Kim
I read the whole thing without actually becoming absorbed in what the hell it was they were doing.

Zen And The Art Of Motorcycle Maintenance
Zen and the art of complete bollocks.

The Secret
The secret is that there's no secret.

Anything by James Patterson or

Dean Koontz