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Rude/Insensitive Things People Have Said and Done to You

UpCork

I have a family member undergoing chemotherapy for cancer and as a result I frequent a breast cancer message board to read up on what others are saying about treatment etc.

Anyway, a very popular thread on that forum is rude/insensitive things people said and did when they were told of their friend/family members illness. I could not believe what some people had said to them.

We, as a family have had a bit of experience of that too, since my relative's diagnosis.

That got me thinking - not in relation just to illness, but what is the rudest, most insensitive thing anyone has ever said to you?

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Dr.Robotnik

Being called gruesome...of all words

Being told by an ex who was had a similar build as Doug from King of Queens that I should go to the gym and tone up a bit. Fcuk off

"You're lucky you're pretty because you are so dumb"

[Deleted User] wrote: »

Feeling so sad after reading some of these. Can't share any of my own or I'll be even sadder.
Think I'm gonna start complimenting random strangers on a regular basis and try to offset all the little dicks out there, offending people for a laugh.

I try to do this, even if its only something small. "Your jacket is lovely! Looks so snug and warm too!" Usually makes people smile

beks101

The amount of bile directed at overweight women as evidence in this thread is almost alarming. It would confirm what I've often seen in public too. I think it's a pretty sad indictment on society tbh.

Back on topic, can't really think of anything inherently rude or insensitive that was ever said to me. I'm sure there's been a few. I tend to have a filter, increasingly as I get older. Zero fcuks given. Smile and nod. Some people are just born and will die ignorant. I tend to remember compliments though

The Backwards Man

Whyohwhy? wrote: »

"it's mick ffs"

Nope, I'm not Mick either

[Deleted User]

PucaMama wrote: »

id be so surprised at that id probably question what you were at.

not good when compliments are that surprising to people.

Today a girl in a shop complimented my purse. Made me smile. A tiny thing but still nice. I'll do little ones like that.

cassid

There are a couple of people here I just want to jump into the internet and give them the biggest hug ever:p ,what awful things people say.

As Mark Twain said the more I learn about people, the more I like my dog.

PucaMama wrote: »

id be so surprised at that id probably question what you were at.

Whyohwhy?

The Backwards Man wrote: »

I got called a stupid big thick ignorant Paddy by a train conductor once.

'My name's not Paddy', I replied.

"it's mick ffs"

PucaMama

Deleted User wrote: »

Feeling so sad after reading some of these. Can't share any of my own or I'll be even sadder.
Think I'm gonna start complimenting random strangers on a regular basis and try to offset all the little dicks out there, offending people for a laugh.

id be so surprised at that id probably question what you were at.

[Deleted User]

Feeling so sad after reading some of these. Can't share any of my own or I'll be even sadder.
Think I'm gonna start complimenting random strangers on a regular basis and try to offset all the little dicks out there, offending people for a laugh.

Siog-Alainn

I suffered with acne as a teenager that completely eroded my self confidence. At one stage, I broke out in a rash on my neck from a topical treatment that didn't agree with me. A girl in school saw this rash, thought it was a hickey and then very loudly said in a group "who was kissing you?!"

I was already so self conscious about the acne, and then also the rash and then she goes and draws attention to it, not to mention throwing in a dig about how absurd it would be that anyone would kiss me:(

wp_rathead

why did i think this thread would be a good idea to read before I go to sleep.. a lot of upsetting stories here..
some amount of pricks out there

Hammer89

xLisaBx wrote: »

Don't even know where to start here..

I get a lot of comments about my weight, I have all my life and to be honest I'd be surprised if they ever stopped. Was on a night out 2 weeks ago when 2 young fellas drove past, told me to cover my legs because they were fat, threw a glass bottle of drink at my legs and shouted "that might fix it". I was with a friend so had to hide the fact that I was absolutely devastated. I get a lot of comments off random girls saying that I need fake tan or that I should wear clothes that are more fitted and less clingy to hide my fat. I'll wear whatever the fcuk I like, thank you very much.

I was bullied a lot as a child, but as a teen 3 boys kept at it although the rest had stopped. 2 of them beat me senseless one day after school (I'm a 5 foot 3 girl and these are 2 guys..)

I got offered a place in medicine in a few universities, but decided to study biomedical science instead. My aunt proceeded to tell me that I was a disappointment to my parents and that I should go back and be a doctor. I'll be a biomedical scientist, thank you very much :pac:

"Your body is completely destroyed with those stretch marks, you'll never be able to wear a bikini on holiday" - My Mother.

This is heart-breaking.

Ruu

Yes to weight comments, not just to those who have a little weight on their side, mostly stupid but they still bother me. 'Put a bit of meat on them bones'. That or 'cheer up' or 'smile', people just have no idea. Shut up!

smash

A Chaplin in a hospital peeked her head through the door unannounced literally 2 minutes after finding out some really bad news about a family member and said "it's important to remember that God doesn't make this stuff happen, but he'll be there to help you get through it". In all my life, I've never wanted to punch someone more than that. I chased her out of the room and she ran down the hall.

xLisaBx

Don't even know where to start here..

I get a lot of comments about my weight, I have all my life and to be honest I'd be surprised if they ever stopped. Was on a night out 2 weeks ago when 2 young fellas drove past, told me to cover my legs because they were fat, threw a glass bottle of drink at my legs and shouted "that might fix it". I was with a friend so had to hide the fact that I was absolutely devastated. I get a lot of comments off random girls saying that I need fake tan or that I should wear clothes that are more fitted and less clingy to hide my fat. I'll wear whatever the fcuk I like, thank you very much.

I was bullied a lot as a child, but as a teen 3 boys kept at it although the rest had stopped. 2 of them beat me senseless one day after school (I'm a 5 foot 3 girl and these are 2 guys..)

I got offered a place in medicine in a few universities, but decided to study biomedical science instead. My aunt proceeded to tell me that I was a disappointment to my parents and that I should go back and be a doctor. I'll be a biomedical scientist, thank you very much :pac:

"Your body is completely destroyed with those stretch marks, you'll never be able to wear a bikini on holiday" - My Mother.

apple_ blossom

When I was a teenager my mother felt the need to point out that I was unfortunate to have "inherited" my dad's short legs and not her lovely legs lol ..To this day I feel conscious of it and for years I'd only wear high heels. She also told me to be careful when putting on weight because I have such a body type that it goes on my back (??) I'm a size ten now though I admit I was a little heavier in my teenage years, still , before she pointed out these two "facts" it had never even occured to me and I can't remember being a ..hunchback or whatever. A handbook on a positive body image would have come in handy around the house-for her ! !

December2012

My father was dying, painfully and gradually. He was a religious man in his youth and somebody from the church community called up to see him on his final days. Despite the clear distress of the situation this zealot told my family that it was "wonderful and a great comfort" to my father that he is dying with such suffering, so he can suffer similarly to the Lord he loves so much.

Dick

Gerry Rio

The posters telling stories that take place in the workplace really need to discover the Human Resouces department.

JJJJNR

Had people in work walking past me making sniffing noises, after a family member had committed suicide by over dosing, and encouraged others to do the same. Awful place to work.

TG1

Its probably not the worst thing that's ever been said but it was recent so I remember it.

I broke my pelvis in a few places and when I got out of the hospital after two full weeks was chatting to a friend about how hard it was to have to move back home, use a wheelchair, get the 28 stitches out etc. And she came back with "well now you might have an understanding of how hard it was for me when I broke my foot."

She had a hairline fracture of a metatarsal about 4 years ago and was in a removable cast for a couple of weeks... I was too gobsmacked to do anything but laugh!! I couldn't believe she really thought it was the same thing!

Crann na Beatha

This post has been deleted.

banie01

I was widowed at 27, and even now 8yrs later I encounter levels of questioning and social awkwardness that often defy belief.
But its not a situation many people expect someone my age to be in and I've learned to go with the flow but ne that always sticks in my head is this.
A few years ago I had to fill out a form for the Revenue commissioners to ensure I received the Single person Child carers tax credit, On the form it asks your basic details, PPSN, Marital Status, Address and dependents and so on.
It also states that applying for this relief as primary claimant means the secondary claimant must relinquish their claim to this credit as only one person can claim it.(Fair enough)

So I fill in the form, tick the box that says widowed(Which is in big bold text and 2nd question on the form) and proceed up to a Revenue agent and ask them to look over the form to ensure I completed it correctly and save myself the hassle of a future trip back in.
The Revenue agent looks over the form and informs that there is no way I can claim this relief without having my wife's consent/relinquishment of her claim to it.
I ask the revenue agent to look over the form again and confirm the details(Because often the whole "I'm widowed" conversation is draining and to be fair the details were in their hand) only to be told "it didn't matter how many times I check the form, without her consent i wasn't getting the allowance!"
So I asked her if she could recommend a medium, because without a seance I couldn't see my wife's consent being easily available.......

Starokan

Started a new job , there was a small office off a large one, was in small office with a couple of colleagues who were also new just going through some work , couple girls in main office were talking and one launched into a tirade about this dog ugly bastard who had started that week, it became pretty apparent within about 30 seconds that she was referring to me as the abuse was shockingly personal .

It's years back now but I can still remember the humiliation as my new colleagues did not know where to look , I was kind of dumbstruck but in end stood up and went out and simply requested that if she had something to say then at least say it to my face. She was shocked to be caught but honestly she did not give a damn and my sticking up for myself really set her against me. It was very hard to work in the office for a while afterwards as even though many people were lovely she was insanely popular with everyone and I knew that people were taking sides as they did not want to fall out with her.

It totally isolated me for lunches etc, work nights out, I also would have at that time been a guy who had pretty much zero self confidence so it was a complete mess and I nearly left the job.

My saving grace was a female friend who told me it was make or break for me, stay and be counted or run and she wins. I stayed for another two years, it took me about six months or so to win people over to the fact that I was a normal guy , one thing I knew I had going for me was that I can make people laugh and its a great way to make friends with anyone. Slowly my popularity rose and it drove her to new heights of stupidity until she launched into another more public tirade against me , it backfired and a couple of people who I was now friends stood up for me immediately. That was the end of it, the moment someone spoke up she changed but everyone at that point saw her for the person she was and shortly after she left.

In some ways it was character building but in many ways it was an awful experience I should not have had to go through , people really need to think before they speak - words can and do hurt and the hurt can last years depending on the person they are speaking too or about.You have no idea when you call someone fat or ugly or skinny or whatever just how many times that same insult has ground them down in the past . Just be nice to each other and when you see someone getting put down for no reason try and stand up for them if at all possible

Gerry Rio

JustShon wrote: »

Bit of background for this one. Had a sister who hung herself when I was younger.

Mentally unstable mother of my girlfriend at the time, who didn't like me and was drunk at the time sends this text:

"Hey, just wondering if you use a washer-drier or do you HANG your washing out to dry?"

There was almost a murder that night.

LCD wrote: »

Mother in law saying to my wife (in front of me) less than 2 weeks after our second miscarriage, "you wouldn't understand, your not a mother"

Summer wind wrote: »

When I was 9 months pregnant with my first little boy I'd very high blood pressure and was kept in hospital overnight a few times before I had him. On one morning just after being discharged from hospital my mam and I decided to go to the shop for an hour before going home. We left our car in the car park and walked to the lift. The lift was big enough for 9 people and there was a very well dressed man and a woman and a boy of about 8 years in it.
We got in too and pressed the button for the floor we wanted and the man shouted at us and said his wife was afraid of enclosed spaces and we shouldn't have shared their lift. He kept shouting that we had some cheek and I said to him I've just gotten out of hospital and would he please stop shouting. His reply was that he didn't give a f*ck about me or my child. When the lift stopped he called us a load of names and walked off with his wife who'd remained silent the whole time. His son then called me a bitch and ran off after them. It made me so sad that that boy was being brought up with this as normal behaviour.
Sorry for the long post but I've never forgotten how upset I was that day.

inocybe wrote: »

'What do you want me to do about it?' - first thing a GP said to me when I went to him as I was miscarrying.

'Maybe it's for the best' - father of miscarried child.

:eek:

Riddle101

Not me, but a guy from my old college course. He was weird sort of guy really when I think about it. He was also quite biggish(fat), and was sort of geeky looking. Anyway there were a group of guys in the class who used to be right p*icks. Always laughing everytime he said something, or just mocking him in their own way. One guy compared him the the internet guy from South Park. Anyway he just ignored them the whole time, but I'm pretty sure he was well aware they were mocking him. I was pretty nice to him though, although I'm a bit a loner type, and barely ever socialized with anyone in the course so I never attempted to strike up a friendship with him or anything.

The internet guy from South Park
http://brokenanalog.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/12/1379145196116.jpg

Lone Stone

Some dick joined a class I was in once, just walked up to me one day you have a really big nose. He would just try piss people off, like told one guy he should shave his head because he was going bald ugh was always trying to belittle people. It should be legal to murder people like that.

J Mysterio

melted_face wrote: »

when i was born a neighbour remarked to my mother that i had 'a very mountainy head' . not too sure what it means but can't see anyway it's not insulting

LOL!

2Mad2BeMad

My uncle (who use to bully me when I was a kid) told my Girlfriend of 5 years only last week at a party that she can do so much better then me and why is she with me.

Well I am bigger then him now and I will get my revenge

what an idiotic thing to say to a girl whos with your nephew for so long.
I mean does he really think she would not say it back to me.

Probably not the worse thing to happen to me but since it happened so recently my blood is still boiling over it.

Lashes28

My aunt a few weeks ago. 'Ah sure you don't look pregnant you just look fat.'

Last week,'ahhh now you look pregnant instead of blubby '
Think she thought it was a compliment as she was delighted saying it to me
Just let it go
I'm 7months pregnant I'd be worried if I didn't look any bigger than usual?!?!?

Mesrine65

This Fat Girl Runs wrote: »

It doesn't really warrant a response, even if I could bring myself to call people names. They don't respect me as a person, they're hardly going to respect anything I have to say about their rudeness.

And honestly, these are fleeting moments with random strangers whose names I'll never know and faces I'll never remember. Sure, I remember their words but I don't dwell on them. I certainly don't let them stop me from being me and achieving my goals and dreams.

I know there's more to me than my weight. I have hopes and dreams and hurts and thoughts and ideas and hobbies and friends and family and I love and hate and laugh and cry and smile and frown, just like everyone else does.

I'm not sad for myself when people call me names or say rude things about my weight. I'm sad for them; they can't, or won't, see the people around them for the complex and fascinating beings we actually are. Nothing I could say to them would change that.

That's a fantastic attitude you have, much respect

This Fat Girl Runs

Deleted User wrote: »

Would you ever think of having a standard response, something so blunt that it catches them, like a "f*** off you c***".

Or do you not any to stoop to their level?

Or is it about not drawing them on?

I find it disgusting to think this is a common occurence, and fel sp sorry for you that you almost have to just put up with it.

It doesn't really warrant a response, even if I could bring myself to call people names. They don't respect me as a person, they're hardly going to respect anything I have to say about their rudeness.

And honestly, these are fleeting moments with random strangers whose names I'll never know and faces I'll never remember. Sure, I remember their words but I don't dwell on them. I certainly don't let them stop me from being me and achieving my goals and dreams.

I know there's more to me than my weight. I have hopes and dreams and hurts and thoughts and ideas and hobbies and friends and family and I love and hate and laugh and cry and smile and frown, just like everyone else does.

I'm not sad for myself when people call me names or say rude things about my weight. I'm sad for them; they can't, or won't, see the people around them for the complex and fascinating beings we actually are. Nothing I could say to them would change that.