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Wanker watch: Warning signs that someone is a tosser

Boring username

What sets your alarm bells ringing that someone is a bit of an arsehole? For me, there are a handful of things that almost always ring true (although there have been very, very rare exceptions in general.)

1. Wearing a trendy Palestinian type scarf. Always a major indicator that a know it all, insufferable bore is about to lecture you with their 'right on' views of the world. Sometimes accompanied by a neckbeard and general scruffiness.

2. A cokehead. I don't think I ever met a cokehead who wasn't a prick. It really is a great way of identifying a jumped up big time wannabe. Avoid.

3. Any of that corporate speak i.e. "going forward, we'll touch base, from the get-go, out of the ballpark etc".

You are cordially invited to vent you rage and misgivings in your own words.

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MonkstownHoop

Brian from Bray wrote: »

Men with long hair

Being from Bray and called Brian

Paulownia

Am I mistaken in what this word means? I was certainly under the impression that ladies were biologically capable of the female version of the exercise.

lapua20grain

this pair of ****
http://thedailyedge.thejournal.ie/irish-lads-debs-paris-2328119-Sep2015/

Agricola

lapua20grain wrote: »

this pair of ****
http://thedailyedge.thejournal.ie/irish-lads-debs-paris-2328119-Sep2015/

Jaysus, I thought the idea of the Debs was to go to your first grown up function in a nice suit with a girl in a gown on your arm? These two ditch the women and decide they need a spontaneous getaway to the romance capital of the world!

superelliptic

Baron Kurtz wrote: »

People who have a long list of grievances in this thread. It'd be tough going for a pint with someone rattling off their hates that they can recall with such ease.

In fairness people probably spent a while compiling these lists though...

Sure come for a pint with me and I'll tell you this joke I know :pac:

superelliptic

Kev W wrote: »

So what if people take a lot of pictures of themselves? Who does it hurt?

Themselves, because it encourages narcissism?

And by extension the rest of us who have to put up with them

Dirty Dingus McGee

Any man who proclaims "I'm a feminist".

I'm pretty sure most men are for equal treatment of women so no need to view this point of view as an achievement, to me it also seems to imply that by not declaring your a feminist means you want women to be tied to the kitchen at home.

Tropheus

lapua20grain wrote: »

this pair of ****
http://thedailyedge.thejournal.ie/irish-lads-debs-paris-2328119-Sep2015/

Absolute focking ledges.

Streetwalker

lapua20grain wrote: »

this pair of ****
http://thedailyedge.thejournal.ie/irish-lads-debs-paris-2328119-Sep2015/

So they went from their debs on a whim to Paris and of course they just happened to have their passports and money for flights with them? Hard to believe people fall for these self indulgence publicity stunts.

stephenl15

Streetwalker wrote: »

So they went from their debs on a whim to Paris and of course they just happened to have their passports and money for flights with them? Hard to believe people fall for these self indulgence publicity stunts.

To be fair, they probably had their passports as ID

Saipanne

stephenl15 wrote: »

To be fair, they probably had their passports as ID

To be fair, it was clearly planned and ripped off the antics of an English student about two years ago.

Saipanne

There we go. Same site, same story. Unfunny and unoriginal.

http://www.dailyedge.ie/manchester-night-out-woke-up-in-paris-1184328-Nov2013/

Ging Ging

People who bear a strong physical resemblance to people I already don't like. ****.

valoren

lapua20grain wrote: »

this pair of ****
http://thedailyedge.thejournal.ie/irish-lads-debs-paris-2328119-Sep2015/

Just look at the guy on the right with the pipe in his mouth.
So yeah, a teenager with a pipe, that's a wanker warning sign right there.

Daith

Saipanne wrote: »

There we go. Same site, same story. Unfunny and unoriginal.

http://www.dailyedge.ie/manchester-night-out-woke-up-in-paris-1184328-Nov2013/

This guys seems much better craic. "I'm freezing, can't understand a word, so expensive and my mom thinks I'm a pillock"

vs the lad with a pipe.

osarusan

valoren wrote: »

Just look at the guy on the right with the pipe in his mouth.
So yeah, a teenager with a pipe, that's a wanker warning sign right there.

Not just a warning sign - immediate and definitive proof.

Can we call him an instawanker?

kunst nugget

I bet they're both CEOs at 'Being Mad Bastards'.

Crooked Jack

stuboy01 wrote: »

People that don't tip delivery drivers. Especially when the change is less than a euro. Damn that's tight...allowable exceptions being students. Unforgivable examples being the ridiculously wealthy.

Why? Don't they get paid? I've done a wealth of ****ty minimum wage jobs and I dont remember anyone tipping me. In particular I used to hate the delivery drivers in dominos when I worked there. I was one of the pizza makers, we did all the work while they sat on their arses driving around. Never heard them offering to split tips with us.

asherbassad

lapua20grain wrote: »

this pair of ****
http://thedailyedge.thejournal.ie/irish-lads-debs-paris-2328119-Sep2015/

So they just happened to have their passports at the Debs and didn't actually plan the whole thing in search of attention. ****.

asherbassad

stephenl15 wrote: »

To be fair, they probably had their passports as ID

Not a Garda ID?. I would also imagine that this pair of knobheads probably have drivers licenses or provisionals.

Also last flight to Paris is 19:30 unless these tits took the red-eye at 0620

riclad

People who have large tatoos on arms ,neck, back, people with nose piercing, a ring in the nose .
Any woman with a large tatoo thats visible when she wears a tee shirt .
large tatto =low iq .
Men who have a pony tail .
people who wear celtic football jersey,s to the pub .
Pregnant women who smoke and drink .
People who just wear a tracksuit all the time .

RWCNT

asherbassad wrote: »

Not a Garda ID?. I would also imagine that this pair of knobheads probably have drivers licenses or provisionals.

Also last flight to Paris is 19:30 unless these tits took the red-eye at 0620

So, so salty. I'm sorry you never got up to anything fun when you were young.

kunst nugget

RWCNT wrote: »

So, so salty. I'm sorry you never got up to anything fun when you were young.

Getting pictures taken of myself looking like a cúnt with a pipe wouldn't have been my idea of fun when I was younger. Using the plane ticket money for drugs instead would have been way more fun.

Daith

RWCNT wrote: »

So, so salty. I'm sorry you never got up to anything fun when you were young.

They got on a plane to Paris. Kevin McCallister they're not.

Yeah_Right

riclad wrote: »

People who have large tatoos on arms ,neck, back, people with nose piercing, a ring in the nose .
Any woman with a large tatoo thats visible when she wears a tee shirt .
large tatto =low iq

People that criticise people with tattoos but can't spell tattoo.

asherbassad

RWCNT wrote: »

So, so salty. I'm sorry you never got up to anything fun when you were young.

I did.....and a lot more adventurous than going to the airport and flying somewhere, then alerting the media about it and pretending it was spontaneous.

Mad, crazy bastards aren't they.

Saipanne

I love tattoos on women. I didn't before, but I was dating a woman who did body painting and after experiencing the rather unique scenario of making love to a work of art, I find that ladies with tattoos definitely catch my eye now.

TheBlock

Saipanne wrote: »

I love tattoos on women. I didn't before, but I was dating a woman who did body painting and after experiencing the rather unique scenario of making love to a work of art, I find that ladies with tattoos definitely catch my eye now.

People who make love....Just get your end away lad.

Saipanne

TheBlock wrote: »

People who make love....Just get your end away lad.

I was trying to be delicate about it.

What was great about it was the fact that she was mainly painted blue and she had blonde hair.

So I basically ****ed Smurfette.

[Deleted User]

stuboy01 wrote: »

People that don't tip delivery drivers. Especially when the change is less than a euro. Damn that's tight...allowable exceptions being students. Unforgivable examples being the ridiculously wealthy.

Crooked Jack wrote: »

Why? Don't they get paid? I've done a wealth of ****ty minimum wage jobs and I dont remember anyone tipping me. In particular I used to hate the delivery drivers in dominos when I worked there. I was one of the pizza makers, we did all the work while they sat on their arses driving around. Never heard them offering to split tips with us.

There is usually an existing delivery charge of 1.50/2.00 already also. Sometimes I will though, tbh. I wont miss an extra euro.