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Dumb/Great Facebook Status {merge} [No Names] - Part II

G_R

Original thread here: http://www.boards.ie/vbulletin/showthread.php?t=2056238863

Last thread hit 10k posts so needed to be closed.

Remember, no personally identifiable information please and thanks.

Anyway, as you were

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eternal

skirtgirl wrote: »

"Hav,nt drank since christy 30th birthday. And sham tha was almos 3yrago, ive the house hunked up to cris spekers. Better trne dwmn the musek shamm.il hav gaurds ot 2us. O i lue vodka amd maxmim of wiske haha. O no jut cope iv2 go dwn to athlon mornin. Hope i dot hav lilman on my head bang bang.. Sorry if i derment any1 tonight. Im of peps iv a man to pleac nitynight akl. Booom wha u sa now lok"

I say boom boom turn up the music.

First class honours in UCD?

Michael D Not Higgins

eternal wrote: »

First class honours in UCD?

Booom wha'

Precious flower

anna080 wrote: »

Filters, the right angles, lighting, make up etc.. Basically I could make my big toe look like Cindy Crawford if I tried hard enough

Or girls who post up really grainy/blurry profile pictures where you can just about make out their faces and they get 50 plus likes for it? Along with comments like "Stunner" "Ride" etc.

Rubberlegs

Oh dear Lord, just when I think I have seen it all there's this. A friend liked it so it came up on my newsfeed.

Dear All,

It's been almost a year since I departed and my friend is going to close my account tomorrow.

Think of me now and again with a smile x

This is followed by comments such as "hope you're enjoying it up there, friend"
I had a little stalk on the page, as you do

. It is full of status updates, as if the deceased has written them himself. Letting everyone know his dog is now up there with him is one example. What the actual fook?? It's stuff like this that makes me weep for humanity

kunst nugget

73Cat wrote: »

Oh dear Lord, just when I think I have seen it all there's this. A friend liked it so it came up on my newsfeed.

Dear All,

It's been almost a year since I departed and my friend is going to close my account tomorrow.

Think of me now and again with a smile x

This is followed by comments such as "hope you're enjoying it up there, friend"
I had a little stalk on the page, as you do . It is full of status updates, as if the deceased has written them himself. Letting everyone know his dog is now up there with him is one example. What the actual fook?? It's stuff like this that makes me weep for humanity

'I had my first sh¡t up in heaven. It was epic'

'Jesus is such a dick, he keeps putting my Malteasers through his stigmata. It's rank!'

'Dog poo turns to marshmallows in heaven. No need for pooper scoopers!'

coolhull

But maybe he just departed to Australia a year ago.
And got a pet passport for his dog and shipped him over?
On Facebook anything is possible.

Rubberlegs

coolhull wrote: »

But maybe he just departed to Australia a year ago.
And got a pet passport for his dog and shipped him over?
On Facebook anything is possible.

Hehe ! There is actually a status saying what clothes he was laid out in , and where he is laid to rest. Definitely dead

kunst nugget

73Cat wrote: »

Hehe ! There is actually a status saying what clothes he was laid out in , and where he is laid to rest. Definitely dead

'Can't believe they got me a snazzy Gucci outfit for the coffin. Deffo going to be the best dressed corpse in Glasnevin. #feelingblessed'

efb

73Cat wrote: »

Hehe ! There is actually a status saying what clothes he was laid out in , and where he is laid to rest. Definitely dead

Celtic Jersey?

pebbles21

"I'd like to wish my late dada in heaven a very happy 113th birthday today,still missing you after all these years dada"

F.F.S!!

efb

I hear Facebook is geoblocked in heaven!

PopePalpatine

efb wrote: »

I hear Facebook is geoblocked in heaven!

You wouldn't want "d angles" to hear about pages like "Atheist Jesus", I guess. :pac:

coolhull

If you really want to know Jesus, send him a friend request.

kunst nugget

coolhull wrote: »

If you really want to know Jesus, send him a friend request.

He's very cliquey. Just hangs out with his posse of 12 bros and that's it…

fussyonion

A girl on my FB posted a petition for people to sign to "Stop the Abuse Marq O'Neill is receiving in Big Brother".

She captioned it with: "Guys, I never do this but please sign this. Marq is being bullied in BB and BB hasn't given anyone a warning. It's not right and it's very upsetting to see him getting so worked up. If you do one thing today, sign this."

I don't know what's worse; the fact she's being serious or the fact Mark is spelled "Marq".

This girl is a real cringe-fest; posting pictures of her latest nails, her latest hair-style, her neice, her dinner, the wound she got from cutting veg last week, her Mother on the toilet.
I despair.

FionnK86

My cousin posted a link to an article of the 2004 Madrid Train Bombings to a friend of her's travelling to Fuerteventura, with the message "jesus christ, u'd be in danger evrywhere u go! Der in Spain now 2 Martina,b careful on yer holliers".

FOUR POINTS

1. Fuerteventura is an island, located 2,100km from Madrid.
2. This attack happened over 10 years ago.
3. Fundamentalist Islamic fights have existed in Spain since before the invasion of the Moors in 711AD.
4.My cousin is a gobdaw.

sligojoek

kunst nugget wrote: »

He's very cliquey. Just hangs out with his posse of 12 bros and that's it…

It's down to 11 now. He unfriended Judas.

El Weirdo

sligojoek wrote: »

It's down to 11 now. He unfriended Judas.

Nah, I hear he's quite forgiving.

efb

El Weirdo wrote: »

Nah, I hear he's quite forgiving.

Jesus doesn't unfriend.

efb

Jesus has already sent you a friend request, he's just waiting for you to accept.

coolhull

I often see his name come come up in ''People you may know'' but I would need to find out more about him before I send him a friend request

rsl1976

FionnK86 wrote: »

My cousin posted a link to an article of the 2004 Madrid Train Bombings to a friend of her's travelling to Fuerteventura, with the message "jesus christ, u'd be in danger evrywhere u go! Der in Spain now 2 Martina,b careful on yer holliers".

FOUR POINTS

1. Fuerteventura is an island, located 2,100km from Madrid.
2. This attack happened over 10 years ago.
3. Fundamentalist Islamic fights have existed in Spain since before the invasion of the Moors in 711AD.
4.My cousin is a gobdaw.

I have seen quite a few people share it. They are just sharing without even reading:mad:

Rosie Rant

Someone just posted a status wishing their DOG a very happy 3rd birthday..

Rubberlegs

My cousin posted about the "great start" to her weekend. Apparently, she puked her guts up, "after two bouts of chronic runs". Why she thought this fit to share is beyond me

How so Joe

Rosie Rant wrote: »

Someone just posted a status wishing their DOG a very happy 3rd birthday..

We may have a mutual friend. Unless there's two people out there doing this...

Rosie Rant

How so Joe wrote: »

We may have a mutual friend. Unless there's two people out there doing this...

I'm sure there are plenty of them!

Wishing your kid who can't read a happy birthday online isn't too far off wishing a happy birthday to your "gorgeous fur baby" .

sammyjo90

I'm ashamed to say my sister does this..I love their dog to bits but id never wish it a happy birthday online!

Duffy the Vampire Slayer

We'll be using minions to fight about ISIS next.

MonkstownHoop

Duffy the Vampire Slayer wrote: »

We'll be using minions to fight about ISIS next.

I hate them!

retro:electro

MonkstownHoop wrote: »

I hate them!

Minions or ISIS? I hate both