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Buffalo & Doozerie - The mild musings of two grumpy old men!

Lusk Doyle

Having read a fair amount of giving out rants from these two recently and also the responses to same from both the subject matter of said ranting and fellow boardsies, I think it's time for this thread to be rolled out. Their stories are deserving of their own home!

Buffalo, doozerie - care to humour us?

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Bloggsie

I was going to unleash a volley of abuse towards numpty muppet motorists who havent a clue blah blah blah!, yesterday while crossing from Connolly Station onto Talbot Street, a bloke and a girl broke the red light and gave out to pedestrians who had the cheek to point out the fact that they had the green light to cross, last I heard was back & forwards of effin cyclistsbackstards and a similar reply from a "lovely" girl on a has to be said rather nice trek road bike.

Pinch Flat

Followed a guy on a hybrid through the phoenix park cycle lane this morning.

He stopped to berate each and every of the half a dozen or so walkers and joggers in the cycle lane (it is clearly marked with a symbol indicating no Pedestrians).

Then he broke the red light at park gate street, taking a fairly irresponsible zig zag move into traffic coming from chapelizod direction.

CramCycle

Bloggsie wrote: »

I was going to unleash a volley of abuse towards numpty muppet motorists who havent a clue blah blah blah!, yesterday while crossing from Connolly Station onto Talbot Street, a bloke and a girl broke the red light and gave out to pedestrians who had the cheek to point out the fact that they had the green light to cross, last I heard was back & forwards of effin cyclistsbackstards and a similar reply from a "lovely" girl on a has to be said rather nice trek road bike.

Its every road user has a subset who haven't a clue or have no manners, its not specific to anyone type.

My other pet hate at the minute is stopping at lights at the minute and not the RLJer but the guy who overtakes you and plops right down in front of everyone. The people in front of me were here first, I pulled in behind those who were here first and I overtook you before the lights. Nothing dangerous about it, just the height of bad manners.

If anyone has something witty and clever to say here I would appreciate it as I just can't think of anything. It has to be short though, I have witty things but they are a mouthful and I want something that can be done on a flyby

Bloggsie

CramCycle wrote: »

Its every road user has a subset who haven't a clue or have no manners, its not specific to anyone type.

My other pet hate at the minute is stopping at lights at the minute and not the RLJer but the guy who overtakes you and plops right down in front of everyone. The people in front of me were here first, I pulled in behind those who were here first and I overtook you before the lights. Nothing dangerous about it, just the height of bad manners.

If anyone has something witty and clever to say here I would appreciate it as I just can't think of anything. It has to be short though, I have witty things but they are a mouthful and I want something that can be done on a flyby

"Nice ass" & wink or blow them a kiss if they are the same gender as you when you pass them!

NeedMoreGears

@cram "See you next tuesday" works for me

eeeee

"why?" works for me. It isn't very witty though. I suspect most of the people I say it to have no idea why (!) I say it.
Most of the time I just say nothing and fly by them, grumble a little bit.

CramCycle

Bloggsie wrote: »

"Nice ass" & wink or blow them a kiss if they are the same gender as you when you pass them!

I only give complements to those who deserve them, and this does nothing to express my (admittedly minor) annoyance.

gadetra wrote: »

"why?" works for me. It isn't very witty though. I suspect most of the people I say it to have no idea why (!) I say it.
Most of the time I just say nothing and fly by them, grumble a little bit.

So far mine have been about the same. Best so far has been to slow slightly, "well that (overtake) was f'cking worth it" and then tear off, other than that it is usually, "how's that queue working out for you?" which I suspect is lost.

Alek

I do it sometimes. It is easier / safer to filter than overtake in moving traffic.

I usually go quite fast in the city and get overtaken back very rarely (not bragging, just to support the above).

I am sorry if it hurts someone's feelings though :pac:

DaithiMC

CramCycle wrote: »

I only give complements to those who deserve them, and this does nothing to express my (admittedly minor) annoyance.

So far mine have been about the same. Best so far has been to slow slightly, "well that (overtake) was f'cking worth it" and then tear off, other than that it is usually, "how's that queue working out for you?" which I suspect is lost.

"Yeah, go ahead, we're right behind you!" or the one that always made me feel the worst when said by the mother, (said with a sighing voice) "I'm very disappointed in you" - also gets points for being a bit bizarre saying to strangers!

eeeee

What I particularly don't get, is how people can do something so blatantly wrong/dick-like and it not knock a hop off them. As soon as I so something like that I feel a burning shame of being a dick and feel sheepish and sorry. They seem to be impervious. I don't get it. They just don't realise/accept/countenance that they have done anything wrong/acted the dick.
There is a chronic lack of empathy now I think.

I have never typed the word 'dick' out so many times!

eeeee

DaithiMC wrote: »

"Yeah, go ahead, we're right behind you!" or the one that always made me feel the worst when said by the mother, (said with a sighing voice) "I'm very disappointed in you" - also gets points for being a bit bizarre saying to strangers!

Ha ha ha ha ha that's brilliant!

CramCycle

Alek wrote: »

I am sorry if it hurts someone's feelings though :pac:

Doesn't hurt my ego though, it's just rude, if your faster than them, you will overtake them shortly, you don't know you are faster than them until then though unless you were gaining rapidly before the lights.

The guys who do it to me, I have generally overtaken in the past 250m, if I hadn't then it wouldn't bother me as they more than likely gained on me and know they are faster.

Alek

Doesn't hurt my ego though, it's just rude, if your faster than them, you will overtake them shortly,

I still see no rationale why is it rude to overtake it while cyclists are standing, and not rude when they're moving.

CramCycle

Alek wrote: »

I still see no rationale why is it rude to overtake it while cyclists are standing, and not rude when they're moving.

Imagine you are in a car, and I overtake you on a straight stretch of road, then I come to a set of lights with a long turnaround time. There is no traffic around, low ditches, you catch up with me, and you can see all roads in every direction so you think, ah sure, I will just drive around you and sit in front of me until the lights go green. It soon becomes apparent that you are slower than me while driving, for what ever reason, I now will go through the process of overtaking you again as soon as it is safe to do so.

Do you really not see why this is rude?

buffalo

Alek wrote: »

I still see no rationale why is it rude to overtake it while cyclists are standing, and not rude when they're moving.

It's a queue. Don't skip other people in the queue.

You can pass other shoppers in the aisles, not at the checkouts. Does that help?

Darkglasses

Alek wrote: »

I still see no rationale why is it rude to overtake it while cyclists are standing, and not rude when they're moving.

It's called shoaling, and it's annoying because if you're the faster cyclist, you have to overtake the same person numerous times, or get stuck behind them.

Lusk_Doyle

Alek wrote: »

I still see no rationale why is it rude to overtake it while cyclists are standing, and not rude when they're moving.

Of course, in Poland people have zero idea on how to stand in line. I speak from experience. It's like they still think that the shops have feck all gear left or the other one is "I'm old. Let me through." Your position is understandable. Wrong, but understandable.

Lusk_Doyle

CramCycle wrote: »

Imagine you are in a car, and I overtake you on a straight stretch of road, then I come to a set of lights with a long turnaround time. There is no traffic around, low ditches, you catch up with me, and you can see all roads in every direction so you think, ah sure, I will just drive around you and sit in front of me until the lights go green. It soon becomes apparent that you are slower than me while driving, for what ever reason, I now will go through the process of overtaking you again as soon as it is safe to do so.

Do you really not see why this is rude?

Just start shouting out them "Where the f were you when the other guy attacked? You better ride your a$$ and try to bring him back or you are finished as a domestique."

Alek

Enough, ouch, enough. I'll reconsider

Still, my point is: it is safer to filter than overtake, especially in the city centre traffic. I may annoy some, but at the end of the day it is safer for both me and them if I pass them at lights than negotiate space between moving cars on the right and cyclists on the left.

Before someone says that I do not have to overtake if it is not safe to do so - of course! But even if it is, my judgement of road situation may fail. Filtering is kind of fail-safe.

eeeee

I have found the answer to dealing with shoalers…:

Alek you may want to get a bigger chamois

The tax man

Lusk_Doyle wrote: »

Just start shouting out them "Where the f were you when the other guy attacked? You better ride your a$$ and try to bring him back or you are finished as a domestique."

Preferably decked head to toe in US Postal kit for that added effect.:D

buffalo

Alek wrote: »

Enough, ouch, enough. I'll reconsider

Still, my point is: it is safer to filter than overtake, especially in the city centre traffic. I may annoy some, but at the end of the day it is safer for both me and them if I pass them at lights than negotiate space between moving cars on the right and cyclists on the left.

Before someone says that I do not have to overtake if it is not safe to do so - of course! But even if it is, my judgement of road situation may fail. Filtering is kind of fail-safe.

If that's your train of logic, than not filtering and not overtaking is the safest of all. And won't annoy other road users, and therefore doubly safer, because nobody will stab you in the kidneys when you decide to skip past them in the queue.

nomdeboardie

And then there's the 'inner shoaling' - not for the first time a fellow cyclist plonked themselves between me and the footpad as I waited at a red light...
...intending to go LEFT, dammit! :mad:
Move away from them a bit to reclaim some personal space, sighing, then take off quickly on green, signalling left ostentatiously. FFS :rolleyes:

** Gibber **

triggermortis

Lusk_Doyle wrote: »

Of course, in Poland people have zero idea on how to stand in line. I speak from experience. It's like they still think that the shops have feck all gear left or the other one is "I'm old. Let me through."

The Swiss are very similar to this, especially where doors are involved ie going in/out of shops and on/off busses. Not had many experiences with cyclists as my commute is out of normal hours

RobertFoster

buffalo wrote: »

If that's your train of logic, than not filtering and not overtaking is the safest of all. And won't annoy other road users, and therefore doubly safer, because nobody will stab you in the kidneys when you decide to skip past them in the queue.

Ah, I knew I was forgetting something. Multitool ✓ Spare tubes ✓ Mini pump ✓ Bowie knife ✗

buffalo

RobertFoster wrote: »

Ah, I knew I was forgetting something. Multitool ✓ Spare tubes ✓ Mini pump ✓ Bowie knife ✗

Plenty of implements on the multitool to get the job done.

Lusk_Doyle

buffalo wrote: »

Plenty of implements on the multitool to get the job done.

You've gone very aggressive of late!

CramCycle

RobertFoster wrote: »

Ah, I knew I was forgetting something. Multitool ✓ Spare tubes ✓ Mini pump ✓ Bowie knife ✗

Buffalo since his upgrade to A1, win at all costs:

CramCycle

So yet again, the guy who shouldered me a few weeks ago and did not notice, and shoaled past me twice (meaning I had to overtake him twice) makes another appearance. I have seen him many times since but have just rolled on by.

I pull upto the lights and there are two bikes in front of me, so I just stop behind, another bike or two stop behind me. Then, up he comes on the inside and pulls in right in front of us at the lights. I had overtaken him about a minute before hand. I presume that he thought the two on hybrids in front of me were obviously lesser mortals. Needless to say, he took off so slowly I could see the hybrid in front of me having to brake as the slow take off was not expected from this incredible man on metal who had no need for civilised behaviour. He of course then proceeded slowly as he looked at his feet trying to clip in. I pulled out into the traffic lane beside the rapidly increasing queue, and slowed ever so slightly as I passed him. I of course then blanked on the witty retorts mentioned previously, so blurted out "Ever heard of queue, you pr8ck", didn't shout, he looked a bit shocked but he also looked like he still had not clipped in properly. I looked behind me at the next junction to see two of the cyclists he overtook had decided to go past with the hybrid, previously in front of me, drafting him.

Uno my Uno.

CramCycle wrote: »

Its every road user has a subset who haven't a clue or have no manners, its not specific to anyone type.

My other pet hate at the minute is stopping at lights at the minute and not the RLJer but the guy who overtakes you and plops right down in front of everyone. The people in front of me were here first, I pulled in behind those who were here first and I overtook you before the lights. Nothing dangerous about it, just the height of bad manners.

If anyone has something witty and clever to say here I would appreciate it as I just can't think of anything. It has to be short though, I have witty things but they are a mouthful and I want something that can be done on a flyby

Its a pet hate of mine too, in my experience its usually some goon on BSO who will take off like he is Mark Cavendish on the Champ Elysee, blow up within 30 meters and then revert to pedaling at a crawl meaning everyone has to pass him out again. Sometimes it is the slightly older type in a suit and tie who is more important that the rest of us because we aren't him.

I have taken to occasionally calling out to both types "excuse me, its rude to skip the queue." or "excuse me, we are all waiting for the lights." if you do it right everyone hears and shoaler gets a kind of mortified look on their face which I am ashamed to admit, makes me feel as if I have done my good deed for the day. A lot of people just give a stonewall reaction and on more than a few occasions I have been told to "fcuk off" but luckily that doesn't bother me very much, I've made my point at that stage and everyone else knows it.