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Most stupid requests you've ever had at work?

bear1

Anyone have to suffer the most idiotic questions at work almost everyday?

Yesterday I was asked by our financial controller how to refresh a page....
Today I was asked why I didn't use certain payment terms in a document.
I politely said that if I am not given those details how am I to know and that the system inserts the default date.
This goes back and forth until I'm asked how did I not know what dates she wants?
ARE YOU FCUKING MENTAL!?!?!?!

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A_Sober_Paddy

secondrowgal wrote: »

I actually have no idea what you're saying here??

Work in retail

We bank daily for the previous days takings, the amount we must bank is generated by our in house system.

The other day the amount to bank was €2,750, but we only had €2,600 by the time the banks closed. But in that €2,600 included coins and money to keep the till full, so we could give out change.

So i rang the bosses boss, to inform him of the issue, and he asked me WHY i couldn't bank the €2750 with what was in store...I told him we were short, he still asked WHY???

The fact is the only question i was asked is WHY, by a lad who earns circa £80k a year

The Moldy Gowl

Yeah. Where is this 150 going???

Just bank it the next morning like.

A_Sober_Paddy

Gowlasauras Rex wrote: »

Yeah. Where is this 150 going???

Just bank it the next morning like.

it gets banked the next morning, but you have to report it if its a day late...

The way the system works is, it calculates the amount to bank, i don't know exactly how it does it, the 150(in previous post 2600 was the amount i have available to bank, with probably 170€ in the tills in small notes and coin) was there but in the till in coins and small notes, we get a lot of 50€ notes so its a pain trying to have enough change to service these customers if their purchases are lower than 20€

cml387

Much clearer now.

The Moldy Gowl

A_Sober_Paddy wrote: »

it gets banked the next morning, but you have to report it if its a day late...

The way the system works is, it calculates the amount to bank, i don't know exactly how it does it, the 150(in previous post 2600 was the amount i have available to bank, with probably 170€ in the tills in small notes and coin) was there but in the till in coins and small notes, we get a lot of 50€ notes so its a pain trying to have enough change to service these customers if their purchases are lower than 20€

Yeah it calculates tax and your 3000 gross turns into 2800ish or whatever. I worked in retail for years and hae never heard of money being banked before a bank closed.
Why bank 2600 now and then I'm the morning bank the 150.

You close up at 6. Cash up your til, leave your float of 200. Put the bankings in a bag with a lodgement slip in a safe.
Next morning go to the bank with the money???

The way you do just makes it a few steps too many and that's why he was getting confused.

Gummy Panda

somesoldiers wrote: »

Insert float for flood maybe, you can tell I do a lot of cryptic crosswords- as for the last bit, no notion.

So he doesn't need the monies for the flood from halo?

DesperateDan

Domino's Pizza:

*Customer walks in and orders*

Customer - "Can you bring that out to the pub around the corner there for me like a good lad"
Me - "Sure we can arrange that but you'll be charged extra"
Customer - "Why?"

Eh, let me think, because I'm not a delivery driver and I don't have the f*cking time to bring your food out to you where ever the f*ck you please.

The Moldy Gowl

DesperateDan wrote: »

Domino's Pizza:

*Customer walks in and orders*

Customer - "Can you bring that out to the pub around the corner there for me like a good lad"
Me - "Sure we can arrange that but you'll be charged extra"
Customer - "Why?"

Eh, let me think, because I'm not a delivery driver and I don't have the f*cking time to bring your food out to you where ever the f*ck you please.

Did he give you half the money when you got there to bring back to the till and then the other half in the morning?

A_Sober_Paddy

Gowlasauras Rex wrote: »

Yeah it calculates tax and your 3000 gross turns into 2800ish or whatever. I worked in retail for years and hae never heard of money being banked before a bank closed.
Why bank 2600 now and then I'm the morning bank the 150.

You close up at 6. Cash up your til, leave your float of 200. Put the bankings in a bag with a lodgement slip in a safe.
Next morning go to the bank with the money???

The way you do just makes it a few steps too many and that's why he was getting confused.

Well i don't make the rules on when to lodge, its decided by the bosses, as it currently stands we have a float of 50 for each till since they implemented the current system which has led to serious cash flow issue in some of the store around the country...Float for the safe is non existent as there is technically none...They've spend a fortune on this system and it just makes the job of managing change/cash flow a nightmare

Ging Ging

A_Sober_Paddy wrote:

Well i don't make the rules on when to lodge, its decided by the bosses, as it currently stands we have a float of 50 for each till since they implemented the current system which has led to serious cash flow issue in some of the store around the country...Float for the safe is non existent as there is technically none...They've spend a fortune on this system and it just makes the job of managing change/cash flow a nightmare

Please stop

Adyx

minidazzler wrote: »

Customers ordering a Bombay gin martini... Using those exact words.... And then asking can they change it for something else when they realise it's nothing at all like an Apple Martini..... It's come to a point that anyone who asks for a gin martini gets asked if they know what it is and are they sure,lol it's extremely condescending of me, but definitely needed.

Or people disappointed that Bombay Sapphire isn't actually blue...
During the summer I got asked for an "Absolut 7". He got a Smirnoff and Sprite like everyone else.

anewme

Odd person in the office used to ask everyone to save documents with the cursor left up in the right hand corner, the idea being that everyone knew where the cursor was when they opened a shared document

Loved that one.

Grayson

Someone here replied all to a mail thread to ask if they could be added to that mail thread.

mistress_gi

supervisor asked for a one month long experiment, I got down to getting everything ready and doing the work (this has never been done/published before).
One week later:
"How is it going? where are you results?"
Me: It has been one week, I am yet to get any definitive results
Himself: Well clearly you are not working hard enough!"

WTH just happened?

Grayson

Actually that reminds me, I'm going to assume that anyone here who works for a large company has the same experience. A large bulk mail about something goes out to a huge distribution list (say 2000 people).
Someone replies all to ask that they don't receive future notifications.
Then someone replies to that asking the same.
Then someone replies all with instructions on how to remove yourself from the distribution list.
Then someone replies all to the mail where someone asks to be removed, asking to be removed.

And on it goes.

Axel Lamp

Grayson wrote: »

Actually that reminds me, I'm going to assume that anyone here who works for a large company has the same experience. A large bulk mail about something goes out to a huge distribution list (say 2000 people).
Someone replies all to ask that they don't receive future notifications.
Then someone replies to that asking the same.
Then someone replies all with instructions on how to remove yourself from the distribution list.
Then someone replies all to the mail where someone asks to be removed, asking to be removed.

And on it goes.

And don't forget the person who does a 'reply to all' telling everyone to stop replying to all.

Collie D

One from a couple of days ago.

Supplier emails asking for our postal address to send an invoice to. Recipient forwards it to me asking could I answer for them as it was more of an accounts issue.

Not sure if sheer laziness or stupidity but the original recipient has worked in same building as me for a number of years.

heldel00

Collie D wrote: »

One from a couple of days ago.

Supplier emails asking for our postal address to send an invoice to. Recipient forwards it to me asking could I answer for them as it was more of an accounts issue.

Not sure if sheer laziness or stupidity but the original recipient has worked in same building as me for a number of years.

^^^^ Good lord. That is unbelievable.

Ted_YNWA

Collie D wrote: »

One from a couple of days ago.

Supplier emails asking for our postal address to send an invoice to. Recipient forwards it to me asking could I answer for them as it was more of an accounts issue.

Not sure if sheer laziness or stupidity but the original recipient has worked in same building as me for a number of years.

heldel00 wrote: »

^^^^ Good lord. That is unbelievable.

Some people do want to put themselves on the radar as a point of contact for external clients.

DuchessduJour

Had to write a report on merger control and the Anti Monopoly Law in Japan back in March 2013. The Japanese fiscal year runs from April to April, so the latest data I used was from the 2011 fiscal year as the report was written during the 2012 fiscal year. I got torn a new one for using 'outdated information' and was told that the entire report was totally worthless as a result :rolleyes:

Birneybau

DuchessduJour wrote: »

Had to write a report on merger control and the Anti Monopoly Law in Japan back in March 2013. The Japanese fiscal year runs from April to April, so the latest data I used was from the 2011 fiscal year as the report was written during the 2012 fiscal year. I got torn a new one for using 'outdated information' and was told that the entire report was totally worthless as a result :rolleyes:

Shocking

Collie D

Ted_YNWA wrote: »

Some people do want to put themselves on the radar as a point of contact for external clients.

Could be. To be fair I can understand her not wanting to be bombarded with another department's post but she could have just told the supplier to mark it "FAO Accounts" which the supplier probably would have done anyway
.

I answered politely anyway. Sometimes it's not worth getting into a game of email tennis when you're still trying to make up for work that piled up over Xmas holiday.

Another post related one from a few years back when I worked on the reception/postroom. In this case I'm the guilty party.

Lady (fairly senior role) within the company emails me saying she was expecting a package containing some disks which she needed urgently. Could I keep an eye out for them and let her or someone in her department know as soon as they arrive? Yes of course but I'm out of office for most of the day so will pass message along to my two colleagues.

I forward her email to the two guys and CC herself and her department saying Miss X urgently requires some DICKS and to give them to her ASAP.

Luckily she saw the funny side and she told me she had a good laugh on an otherwise stressful day

Paddy Cow

When I left a very small company (mother and son) and the son rang me asking me to delete gmail from my laptop, as he didn't think I should have access to their emails anymore. He couldn't seem to wrap his head around the idea that I couldn't delete gmail from my laptop and all he had to do was change his password. He kept arguing with me that I had to delete gmail :pac:

After much debate, I convinced him that the only thing he could do was change his password, which it turns out, he didn't know how to do. Even after going through the steps with him and making sure I didn't know the new password, he still was a bit suspicious that I could somehow hack into their system and play havoc :rolleyes: It was only when I said to him "try logging in with the old password" and he was denied access, was he happy that I could no longer access their emails.

as_mo_bhosca

Can I get an Irish Scotch?

There's something wrong with this bread. I think it's stale. It just breaks up when I try to butter it.
That's weet-a-bix, sir. It's a breakfast cereal. You put it in a bowl and add milk.

Cuddlesworth

I got asked to fix a Toaster. I was a low level desktop IT tech. I didn't know how to react. I just walked away.

panevthe3rd

In a meeting once discussing the problem of a field along the river being unusable during floods when one guy suggests that we could pump the floodwater back into the river. Everybody just pretended not to hear it and quickly moved on.

New Home

I was asked by my line manager to check first manually -with paper and pen- and then with a calculator the totals of a spreadsheet full excel calculations to make sure they were correct. :mad:

I was asked by a client if I had received a fax which he said he hadn't sent yet.

I had to have a conference call with a client and their counterparts - the counterparts didn't want to disclose their delivery details 'because that's confidential information' - how the hell can we deliver if you don't tell us where?!?

:mad:

I was asked, 'If I photocopy a black and white picture with a colour photocopier, will it come out in colour? And if I print it from a colour printer?' For the love of puppies....:mad::rolleyes:

I struggled for months on end with a co-worker who could never find her excel files in word, and vice versa, and kept asking me for help. To her, opening excel or word, and opening a folder, were exactly the same thing... I had to explain to her that you keep your socks in your sock drawer, and your underpants in your underpants drawer, but that both drawers belonged to the same chest of drawers. *bangs head against the wall*

Plllenty more, I'll post them when they spring to mind.

RainyDay

New Home wrote: »

I struggled for months on end with a co-worker who could never find her excel files in word, and vice versa, and kept asking me for help. To her, opening excel or word, and opening a folder, were exactly the same thing... I had to explain to her that you keep your socks in your sock drawer, and your underpants in your underpants drawer, but that both drawers belonged to the same chest of drawers. *bangs head against the wall*

I sympathise with her. Separating files based on the file type is a terrible idea, and one of the worst structures that MS gave us with default Windows settings.

somefeen

Right so basicaly all of boards is IT people?

Not a clue what half of ye are on about

New Home

Personally, I'm not IT but I do work with computers... if you pardon the analogy, just because I have to drive a car it doesn't automatically make me a mechanic, although I know where the engine is...