costadeldole wrote: » I am a 37 year old man, never married, no kids. Am I happy? Yes. I don't feel the need, or desire to every marry or have kids. For some its an ambition or goal in life, but for others like me; it isn't. And that is just the way it is, different strokes for different folks. I used to get some peer pressure from parents, and friends; but after years of it they stopped, and just accepted me for who I am. In Ireland its cultural, and expected of us to marry and have kids, people follow their parents wishes and expectations; often marrying or having children with the wrong partner in doing so. Personally I feel the key to happiness is not giving a f.uck what anyone thinks of you. Its easier said than done, but the more free one is from expectations, the happier one is. I can understand why people want to marry and have kids, but I value you my freedom to do what I like with no responsibilities more. Selfish? Yes, it is. Lonely? At time yes. But being able to do as you wish, without having to consider anyone else's wishes is a luxury. I have friends that are happily married with kids, and those that aren't. So it works for some, and not for others. The only problem I have, is that often a man in his late 30's or early 40's without a wedding ring or kids, is stereotyped as being odd or gay. Being older and single with no kids does attract women though, as the younger ones often want a mature man, over one their age. And the older women prefer a man with no ex-wife or kids to deal with; so it has its benefits sometimes. I used to worry about not being married and having no kids up until about 35, but then I stopped caring about it. At this stage in life, I don't think my view will change.
costadeldole wrote: » I am a 37 year old man, never married, no kids. Am I happy? Yes. I don't feel the need, or desire to every marry or have kids. For some its an ambition or goal in life, but for others like me; it isn't. And that is just the way it is, different strokes for different folks. I used to get some peer pressure from parents, and friends; but after years of it they stopped, and just accepted me for who I am. In Ireland its cultural, and expected of us to marry and have kids, people follow their parents wishes and expectations; often marrying or having children with the wrong partner in doing so. Personally I feel the key to happiness is not giving a f.uck what anyone thinks of you. Its easier said than done, but the more free one is from expectations, the happier one is. I can understand why people want to marry and have kids, but I value my freedom to do what I like with no responsibilities more. Selfish? Yes, it is. Lonely? At time yes. But being able to do as you wish, without having to consider anyone else's wishes is a luxury. I have friends that are happily married with kids, and those that aren't. So it works for some, and not for others. The only problem I have, is that often a man in his late 30's or early 40's without a wedding ring or kids, is stereotyped as being odd or gay. Being older and single with no kids does attract women though, as the younger ones often want a mature man, over one their age. And the older women prefer a man with no ex-wife or kids to deal with; so it has its benefits sometimes. I used to worry about not being married and having no kids up until about 35, but then I stopped caring about it. At this stage in life, I don't think my view will change.
anncoates wrote: » While I'm impressed and respect your view, 37 is actually relatively young. If you still feel that way in 20 years time, Id be even more impressed.
Teyla Emmagan wrote: » Great to be a man!
costadeldole wrote: » I am a 37 year old man, never married, no kids. Am I happy? ....... I used to worry about not being married and having no kids up until about 35, but then I stopped caring about it. At this stage in life, I don't think my view will change.
costadeldole wrote: » .Being older and single with no kids does attract women though, as the younger ones often want a mature man, over one their age. And the older women prefer a man with no ex-wife or kids to deal with; so it has its benefits sometimes. .
anncoates wrote: » ?
Teyla Emmagan wrote: » Just moaning about my biological clock again. You know, the usual
costadeldole wrote: » I can understand why people want to marry and have kids, but I value my freedom to do what I like with no responsibilities more. Selfish? Yes, it is.
supersean1999 wrote: » In fairness its pretty hard to tell if anyone is happy. Especially men. Iv a good few mates who are single. We dont tend to sit down and discuss there happiness much. But i know lads who seem to love being single. One buck near 50. No problem getting a woman. But loves his freedom. Big tv for sports. He did tell me once that he would crack up if someone was nagging him about doing the dishes. Etc etc. So i guess he is happy. Or else he is just a big childish pleb.
Saralee4 wrote: » Whatever works for you Costadeldole and as long as you are genuinely happy and don't hurt anyone else then I don't see a problem. Your quote above though about the younger women wanting an older mature man? You sound very mature but when a woman goes for an older man because he is 'mature' I would imagine that is probably or possibly because they feel they might be or may have been messed around some 'immature' younger man. Do these women that you attract know that you are a confirmed bachelor, not interested in a relationship or children ever?
Lau2976 wrote: » I know girls who would be around my own age (24) who would go for men like Costadeldole because he doesn't want that. I even know a girl who won't date anybody under 35 because of it. A lot of the girls I know want flings and not relationships or friendships. So they go with slightly older bachelors because they feel gaurenteed that they'll just want some fun.
Saralee4 wrote: » Really? I would have thought the opposite that more men in early 20s would be more interested in a casual relationship and the more mature man would be looking for something more meaningful and deeper by that time. I not saying that an older man should be that way! What i am saying is if i was a 24 year old women and looking for casual sex i dont think it would be hard to find another 24 year old man looking for the same thing so i wouldnt think that i would have to necessarily attract an older man in order to do that.
karaokeman wrote: » Anyone know any confirmed bachelors/ never met anyone special who were happy?
