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Child Item

Putting people in their place.

Lando Griffin

So today my OH was buying a smart phone and the assistant was loving showing off how tech savy she was when she asked " You have wifi dont you" in a patronising way.
My OH looked at me quizingly to which I replied " yea, we have two of them"
This shut her right up and we bought the phone and insurance and left.
Have you ever put some wise crack in their place?

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NuckingFacker

Was buying the damn phone not a bit of a "negates smart comment I made in my own little mind"ish thing to do? Surely not buying the phone was the better road to take?

She goes "you do have wifi right?"
You go "Yes, and now you have a phone you could have sold, byyyee".

I like that version better.

Senna

The jerk store called, they're running out of you!!!

Annasopra

I still don't get this

danish pasterys

RachaelVO wrote: »

I only ever think of something smart to say about 2 days later :mad::mad::mad:

Haha same here except almost with everything

danish pasterys

I was in tesco and the shop assistant asked me if i was blind tat i didnt see a sign and i took it like a little bitch. That was two years ago and my god that will never happen again i dont take any **** anymore off people

Chucken

danish pasterys wrote: »

Haha same here except almost with everything

danish pasterys wrote: »

I was in tesco and the shop assistant asked me if i was blind tat i didnt see a sign and i took it like a little bitch. That was two years ago and my god that will never happen again i dont take any **** anymore off people

Yes. Indeed.

ringadingding

I bet it did shut her up .

How the fûck do you reply to that ?

razorblunt

Wahey it's one of those threads were people post stories but include the witty remark they thought of after the matter. Splendid.

shleedance

I can never think of one to save my life.

The closest I got was when a knackerish kid said to me as I went down the road "nice bike" in a very sarcastic tone. I replied "nice hat" in an equally sarcastic tone.

Mugatuu

In the shop I work in, a large group of students came in the other day, three guys came up to the counter, they were all fairly tall, seemed older and I didn't think they were part of the students, one of them was a good 6ft and I asked did he get any petrol or diesel and he laughed in my face and handed me a bottle of sprite.

I looked and him and repeated the question and he goes "erm no I'm 18 for god sake?!" I replied "I assume you didn't get fuel then". and he responds with "clearly not... I got a bottle of sprite" proceeds to point to it on the counter and goes "Oh I suppose you want to see my Age-card for the sprite do you?!"

Seen as he was rude to me for no reason and clearly acting up in front of his friends I decided to put him in his place and told him no I clearly didn't want to see his little age card and asked him if he wanted a medal? he started to go all red and I handed him a "share a coke" key-ring, he asked what the key-ring was for and I told him it was for his bruised ego and his friends burst out laughing at him and he went even more red!

In fairness he deserved to be put in his place for showing of to his friends by being rude to me.. idiot !:pac:

Chucken

razorblunt wrote: »

Wahey it's one of those threads were people post stories but include the witty remark they thought of after the matter. Splendid.

Its not really one of those threads. Its mostly people wondering what the OP was on about.

Birneybau

EdenHazard wrote: »

Working and these nackers start wisecracking, 'dopey looking c*nt' and the uglies lad I've ever seen goes 'look like a cabbage' I was like 'dude, you have no hairline, your eyes are too close together, you have terrible skin, and have a double chin, also your pale as ****, go out and get the sun, then come back and call me that.

Classic EdenHazard

Birneybau

Mugatuu wrote: »

In the shop I work in, a large group of students came in the other day, three guys came up to the counter, they were all fairly tall, seemed older and I didn't think they were part of the students, one of them was a good 6ft and I asked did he get any petrol or diesel and he laughed in my face and handed me a bottle of sprite.

I looked and him and repeated the question and he goes "erm no I'm 18 for god sake?!" I replied "I assume you didn't get fuel then". and he responds with "clearly not... I got a bottle of sprite" proceeds to point to it on the counter and goes "Oh I suppose you want to see my Age-card for the sprite do you?!"

Seen as he was rude to me for no reason and clearly acting up in front of his friends I decided to put him in his place and told him no I clearly didn't want to see his little age card and asked him if he wanted a medal? he started to go all red and I handed him a "share a coke" key-ring, he asked what the key-ring was for and I told him it was for his bruised ego and his friends burst out laughing at him and he went even more red!

In fairness he deserved to be put in his place for showing of to his friends by being rude to me.. idiot !:pac:

You told him! Woo, would have loved to have seen his face. BURN!

krudler

So hang on, she asked you a perfectly normal question when buying a phone ensuring you weren't going to be spending a fortune on mobile data, you told her something stupid then bought phone insurance? you do realise you gave her extra commission for that?

Birneybau

Shut up Becky!

Corvo Attano

I'm at a loss to get anything from that OP.

OP you have come across as a mighty fool.

efb

For the OP:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7f_HsjpSVaI

skregs

I remember this bitch in a phone shop asked me if I had wifi and I just looked at her dead in the eye, straight on, silently, for about 15 seconds, not blinking, not looking away. Then I told her I had banana flavoured milk in the fridge at home, handed her €50 and walked out without buying anything, and she didn't even work there.

I didn't look back, but if I did, the look on her face would have said it all. We both knew I had won that battle.

Rackstar

Don't know who's thicker the op or his wife. What a waste of a thread.

Super-Rush

Both the op's wifi's must be down.

LisaLee

I was working in a deli and we had a hot food unit with a door that customers could open on their side of the counter and take out the food (burgers, chicken wings etc). It had a sign above it called 'Grab and Go'.

One day a group of lads came in and one of them stands in front of it, has a look and knocks on the glass of the unit.
Guy: "Hey! Here, you!"
Me: "Yes?"
Guy: "Gimme a burger and some chicken wings"
*His friends are watching and smirking*
Me: "Sure, just open the door on your side and take them out."
Guy: "What? How does this thing work?"
Me: *Pointing to the sign* It's a grab and go unit. You just open the door and grab the food you want, then go to the till and pay for it.

He went bright red and his friends fell about the place laughing at him. Not the first time he had tried showing off in the shop in front of his mates, but it was the last time!

Sinfonia

wil wrote: »

No, still singular. It's a technology, not an object.

I have 'IEEE 802.11b Direct Sequence' just didnt trip off the tongue.

Perhaps this is the basis of the OPs retort? That 'having WiFi' technically doesn't make sense in the first place, thereby highlighting that the sales clerk wasn't so tech-savvy after all. Still, not great.

Senna wrote: »

The jerk store called, they're running out of you!!!

What's the difference, you're their all-time best seller!
waits for it...

MadsL

A friend of mine calls wifi "Whiffy"

Do I win?

Andrewf20

This...

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/uknews/law-and-order/5698062/Burglar-left-bruised-and-bleeding-by-retired-boxer-72.html

Also a few years ago, a few hoodies were kicking off upstairs at the back of a double decker bus near Amien street in evening traffic. They were shouting, laughing, and smoking weed and being a general annoyance to everyone. I reckon a punter who proceeded to go downstairs to get off the bus tipped the driver off about the carry on upstairs, because he put on the anchors at a bus stop and came roaring across the P.A something like. "THIS BUS ISNT MOVING 1 INCH UNTIL YOU IDIOTS UPSTAIRS AT THE BACK DROP THE SMOKES AND CUT THE CRAP OUT. ANYMORE NONSENSE AND ILL BE RINGING THE GUARDS". The lads quietened down but got off about 2 stops later. Brilliant.

Sunglasses Ron

Lando Griffin wrote: »

So today my OH was buying a smart phone and the assistant was loving showing off how tech savy she was when she asked " You have wifi dont you" in a patronising way.
My OH looked at me quizingly to which I replied " yea, we have two of them"
This shut her right up and we bought the phone and insurance and left.
Have you ever put some wise crack in their place?

I don't get it.

As for mine, in 1974 I was catching the London train from Crewe station. It was very crowded; I found myself in a last-minute rush for the one remaining seat beside a tall, good-looking man with collar-length hair, it was the seventies; buckaroo! I looked up and saw it was none other than Peter Purves, it was the height of his Blue Peter career. He said, "You jammy bastard" and quick as a flash, I replied, "Don't be blue, Peter!"

Needless to say, I had the last laugh, now **** off.

Ted_YNWA

After reading the whole thread & no clear answer to this riddle.

Are the two wifis .. the wifi & wifey .

Is this a poor attempt at humour that backfired ?

justforlaugh

I’m actually starting to feel sorry for the op, bet she's wishing she could lock this thread and make it disappear

A Primal Nut

You might have two routers but you don't have two wi-fis.

oldyouth

Lando Griffin wrote: »

This shut her right up and we bought the phone and insurance and left./QUOTE]

Sales assistant is probably still telling this story to her colleagues

lufties

Lando Griffin wrote: »

So today my OH was buying a smart phone and the assistant was loving showing off how tech savy she was when she asked " You have wifi dont you" in a patronising way.
My OH looked at me quizingly to which I replied " yea, we have two of them"
This shut her right up and we bought the phone and insurance and left.
Have you ever put some wise crack in their place?

jeebus, if talking about wifi is deemed as being tech saavy these days, god help us. do you live on a island off the coast of kerry by any chance?