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Why do people still have expensive weddings?

lightspeed

I dont get it at all. My brothers Wedding is gonna cost over €30000. Him and the bride to be have both been saving for over 2 years. I just cant understand why people still pay this kind of money for a wedding.

I know others in work who say they are going to struggle to get the money together for a deposit on a house and yet spare no expense when it comes to the wedding day?

What i find odd is that plenty people from middle class tax bracket to those on the higher end will complain when taxes are increased but will spend this kind of money on one ****ing day?

What is wrong with just getting a neighbour to dress up as a priest, have it in the back garden and let all the guests tuck into a swiss roll?

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Leverarchfile

southsiderosie wrote: »

If a young couple needs cash that badly, perhaps they would be better served by not spending $30,000 on their wedding day.

That's what one couple wanted, as I said, we broke even on ours, it cost considerably less, and as it was well costed and managed and we had decent guests, we'd have made money if we had invited more.
Very useful for any young couple starting out in life and why would you begrudge them that ?

There were some people we could not invite because we thought we could not afford it, now we're sorry we didn't.

Addle

Leverarchfile wrote: »

a young couple need a cash present starting out in life.

But couples choosing to marry now mostly aren't that young and are rarely starting out in life.

Leverarchfile

eviltwin wrote: »

See when i got married I just wanted my nearest and dearest there, I didn't do it to make a few bob.

Not everyone has that choice, and a lot of people are invited to stop them pissing and moaning about not being invited, not because they are actually wanted there.

April O Neill

Leverarchfile wrote: »

we'd have made money if we had invited more.

Leverarchfile wrote: »

There were some people we could not invite because we thought we could not afford it, now we're sorry we didn't.

Ugh, tacky.

Who else would you have invited, assuming you invited everyone who meant something to you? Just some bums on seats in order to turn a profit? I'd love to be filler wedding guest, to be bled for money. NOT.

Leverarchfile

Addle wrote: »

But couples choosing to marry now mostly aren't that young and are rarely starting out in life.

I don't know what your definition of young is, are you saying most are not planning a family, home etc ? Are you going to pensioners weddings ?

Leverarchfile

April O Neill wrote: »

Ugh, tacky.

Nothing tacky about living and setting up home. Some people can't have daddy pay for everything.

eviltwin

Leverarchfile wrote: »

I don't know what your definition of young is, are you saying most are not planning a family, home etc ? Are you going to pensioners weddings ?

Every single wedding I have been to in the past 10 years the couples were living together. Many already had kids.

Leverarchfile

April O Neill wrote: »

Ugh, tacky.

Who else would you have invited, assuming you invited everyone who meant something to you? Just some bums on seats in order to turn a profit?

Something your probably scarce of. Friends.

Leverarchfile

eviltwin wrote: »

Every single wedding I have been to in the past 10 years the couples were living together. Many already had kids.

So what's wrong with them getting married ? Were they all rich ?

southsiderosie

Leverarchfile wrote: »

Nothing tacky about living and setting up home. Some people can't have daddy pay for everything.

No, they have (apparently unwanted) wedding guests to do that! :P

.jacksparrow.

Just leave people to do as they wish, once their not harming you why would you piss and moan about it?

eviltwin

Leverarchfile wrote: »

So what's wrong with them getting married ? Were they all rich ?

Of course not, I'm just saying they already had their big buys sorted, house, cars etc. They weren't young people starting out on life

April O Neill

Leverarchfile wrote: »

Nothing tacky about living and setting up home. Some people can't have daddy pay for everything.

Daddy won't be paying for mine. Couldn't even if he wanted to.

Your attitude is crass in the extreme.

Leverarchfile

southsiderosie wrote: »

No, they have (apparently unwanted) wedding guests to do that! :P

If you're not decent enough to pay your own way, then stay at home rather than expect to whine and dine at others expense.

April O Neill

Leverarchfile wrote: »

Something your probably scarce of. Friends.

Nope. Yay for me! \0/

April O Neill

Leverarchfile wrote: »

Not everyone has that choice, and a lot of people are invited to stop them pissing and moaning about not being invited, not because they are actually wanted there.

Well, they were wanted. For their filthy lucre.

inmyday

Leverarchfile wrote: »

Something your probably scarce of. Friends.

Sure get divorced, then get married again next year, and see can you make a profit.
If you can make a good profit, maybe repeat it every two years. Never work again!

[Deleted User]

Mod

Leverarchfile has been sitebanned so he won't be responding again.

Sierra Oscar

The gifts themselves cover a huge cost of the wedding, especially since most people now just give cash. I know of one couple who have made a profit on a big wedding! Although the parents did help out with the costs somewhat I would imagine.

inmyday

Sierra Oscar wrote: »

The gifts themselves cover a huge cost of the wedding, especially since most people now just give cash. I know of one couple who have made a profit on a big wedding! Although the parents did help out with the costs somewhat I would imagine.

Is it just me, or does anyone else hate the word "profit" being used when talking about wedding??? A wedding is not a business.

These are gifts from your family and friends.

On an old thread on boards about wedding presents, someone said that they give cards with receipts from a charity donation. Prefect present imo.

April O Neill

inmyday wrote: »

Is it just me, or does anyone else hate the word "profit" being used when talking about wedding???

Yup.

Grayson

krudler wrote: »

Last ones standing have mood brought right down by singsong of dour Irish songs, everyone else is "sshhhed" while someone drunkenly belts one out.

I thought I was the only one who hated that. It's the worst part of any wedding.

And you're always made feel like you're the one ruining everyones buzz by wanting to do something different.

spankysue

Grayson wrote: »

I thought I was the only one who hated that. It's the worst part of any wedding.

And you're always made feel like you're the one ruining everyones buzz by wanting to do something different.

I hate that too, we want to do the end of our wedding different, when it comes to the national anthem, we're going to get our DJ to play Ghost Town

[Deleted User]

30 K on a wedding is mad considering how high the Divorce rate is getting these days. Big gamble.

How much will a divorce cost ?

People should only invite their closest friends and not who their parents want them or feel they should invite. This think of inviting relatives, neighbours etc that you are not close to is ridiculous.

What's wrong with a marquee in your garden if you have one or one of the relations, friend etc ?, DJ and a catering service ?

Then the Church weddings when most people don't even go to Mass, all for the attention of walking down the Isle in the white dress ! mad!

Addle

[Deleted User] wrote: »

What's wrong with a marquee in your garden if you have one or one of the relations, friend etc ?, DJ and a catering service ?

There's the hassle involved in organising it and that it probably costs more than a reception in a hotel.

krudler

Grayson wrote: »

I thought I was the only one who hated that. It's the worst part of any wedding.

And you're always made feel like you're the one ruining everyones buzz by wanting to do something different.

Its the worst part of any gathering or night out, the misery inducing Irish songs at the end. way to end the night on a downer.

2mins into this, nails it

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kpZbaz3Wlfw

awec

What I don't understand is people who invite people they barely know, or don't even know at all.

If they aren't the bride or grooms family, or the bride or grooms close friend, or the +1 of the bride or grooms close friend then what the hell are they doing there?

I reckon some people think they have to invite every person they've ever met, as if Sally who lived 2 doors down 10 years ago is going to be offended at the lack of an invite.

I don't really understand why anyone would need more than 100 or so people at their actual wedding (barring having some pretty large family). The rest of the people can come to the reception in the evening after the meal has been served. Saves the couple a fortune, it saves the attendees money too. That's been the way at the past few weddings I've been at and it has been far, far better.

oldyouth

Addle wrote: »

2 massive generalisations.
Lots of women aren't interested in the big to do.
Lots of men are.

Lots maybe, I'll grant you, but hardly equal numbers. IMO, men, for their wedding, want whatever will make the bride happy. There is nothing wrong with that but I assure you that the wedding day itself is rarely on a chap's bucket list of things to do before he croaks.

oldyouth

southsiderosie wrote: »

These are two of the more ridiculous generalizations I have seen in AH, and that's saying a lot.

Two and a half hours later, not one agreement to your comment.

(Being AH, I expect that to get back dated now :P)

Corruptedmorals

It's some people's dream. My sister is getting married next year with most of the trimmings, which isn't my cup of tea at all but it's not my day and it's what her and her fiance want. She's no bridezilla and is fully prepared to go cheap with invitations and stuff like that. I love the idea of non traditional weddings, like a barbecue or something in place of a normal reception..but everyone's different and the big traditional day is just what a lot of couples want.