Wasn't suitable for Ladies Lounge so trying it here

Ok first things first im a guy......second thing is im single and have tried online dating.
What I dont understand is that so many women seem to join POF and such sites because all they meet are creepy old drunk men when they are out.
These women seem really genuine and nice.
I am 26 and do not drink, yet I never seem to meet these women anywhere I go.
So my questions are, where do women like to be chatted up, wjat signs do you give guys to say (in a subtle way) that you are interested, and what things are a must or a no-no to say or do when flirting??
P.S Im not desperate, just intruiged!