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Child Item

Breast Feeding in Restaurant

Cheeky_gal

Was out for lunch in a very busy restaurant today and a woman at the table next to us started breast feeding. Couldn't believe it. I thought it was so ignorant. I looked around at people's reactions and everyone seemed shocked. Obviously it's not something people haven't seen before, but in a restaurant while people are eating?

There's a time and a place.

I wonder if the majority of people feel this way. Going by people's facial expressions in the restaurant they weren't too impressed.

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Acoshla

I'd find it a lot stranger to see anybody being fed/eating in a toilet than in a restaurant, where, y'know, you can eat and stuff.

bronte

Reminds me of a story I read a while back where a woman was asked to leave a pub for breastfeeding
http://www.hampsteadpeople.co.uk/groups/generaldiscussion/Breastfeeding-Mother-Asked-Leave-Hampstead-s-King/story-11046424-detail/story.html

Probably illegal as hell. :eek:

ceadaoin.

Cheeky_gal wrote: »

Exactly, I never once said it was "disgusting" of the mother, but I do think she could have done it elsewhere. Not in a restaurant.

You all seem very annoyed. I didn't mean to cause offence. A debate more so as it's an interesting discussion.

As people have said,its not like she whipped her top off and exposed her nipples to the entire restaurant. So what exactly is your problem with it? Why should it be done elsewhere?

If you think that a germ filled public toilet is a suitable place to feed a baby then you really are ignorant!

LETHAL LADY

Its a common misconception that cavemen clubbed women on the heads in order to claim them as their own, the truth is that they found one of the most natural acts between mother and baby put them off their dinner.

Princess Peach

hondasam wrote: »

Babies do not just get hungry,mothers have a good idea when the next feed is due and plan accordingly. If the mother had just got to the restaurant she would have known the baby was due a feed.
Maybe she could have tried to give the baby a drink from a bottle first, maybe she did try this I dunno.

But why should she have to try feeding her baby with a bottle? She has chosen to breastfeed, for many reasons that are proven beneficial for both mother and baby.

I don't understand this issue at all. We have all seen boobs, we have all seen babies. I don't know what the deal is.

AboutTwoFiddy

Should have taken out a camera and posted it on YouTube!

Bobby42

I can never understand people's outrage with breastfeeding.
What was the mother supposed to do?
Her infant was hungry, was she supposed to put the sensitivities and feelings of the strangers in the restaurant ahead her own child's needs?
Next time you see breastfeeding in public and you're "outraged" just remember that the infant and his or her needs are more important that your personal comfort. So look away, the situation will blow over in a few minutes.

hondasam

Princess Peach wrote: »

But why should she have to try feeding her baby with a bottle? She has chosen to breastfeed, for many reasons that are proven beneficial for both mother and baby.

I don't understand this issue at all. We have all seen boobs, we have all seen babies. I don't know what the deal is.

I meant give the baby a drink from a bottle which most mothers do between feeds. I don't know what age this baby is. Expressing milk and feeding with a bottle is common also even for mothers who breastfeed.

dark crystal

Cheeky_gal wrote: »

Was out for lunch in a very busy restaurant today and a woman at the table next to us started breast feeding. Couldn't believe it. I thought it was so ignorant. I looked around at people's reactions and everyone seemed shocked. Obviously it's not something people haven't seen before, but in a restaurant while people are eating?

There's a time and a place.

I wonder if the majority of people feel this way. Going by people's facial expressions in the restaurant they weren't too impressed.

You sure get shocked easily OP. You must have had one hell of a sheltered upbringing if seeing a mother feeding her child naturally disgusts you so much.

I honestly believe some people have no idea what breasts were actually designed for....

LETHAL LADY

Princess Peach wrote: »

But why should she have to try feeding her baby with a bottle? She has chosen to breastfeed, for many reasons that are proven beneficial for both mother and baby.

I don't understand this issue at all. We have all seen boobs, we have all seen babies. I don't know what the deal is.

But it only ok on the beach or page 3 it seems.

ilovesleep

hondasam wrote: »

Babies do not just get hungry,mothers have a good idea when the next feed is due and plan accordingly. If the mother had just got to the restaurant she would have known the baby was due a feed.
Maybe she could have tried to give the baby a drink from a bottle first, maybe she did try this I dunno.

Every baby is different and some are more hungier than others. Nobody knows expect for the mother what sort of a gap there is between. Say for example there was a two hour gap between feeds. A two hour timeframe does not leave much of a time frame to do your business in town and a break will be needed to feed.

Dudess

We live in a society where breasts in a sexual context is more acceptable than breasts being used for their primary function - I don't use this term often, but it's a pretty repressed attitude.

ceadaoin.

hondasam wrote: »

Babies do not just get hungry,mothers have a good idea when the next feed is due and plan accordingly. If the mother had just got to the restaurant she would have known the baby was due a feed.
Maybe she could have tried to give the baby a drink from a bottle first, maybe she did try this I dunno.

Eh,Babies do just get hungry sometimes. If they are having a growth spurt they might want to feed every hour. Anyway maybe the mother knew the baby was due a feed so she went to the restaurant to sit down and do it. She probably didn't expect such backwards attitudes from other diners.

hondasam

ilovesleep wrote: »

Every baby is different and some are more hungier than others. Nobody knows expect for the mother what sort of a gap there is between. Say for example there was a two hour gap between feeds. A two hour timeframe does not leave much of a time frame to do your business in town and a break will be needed to feed.

I know and I'm not having a go at the mother at all, if she is happy and comfortable then that's what matters but I suppose what I'm saying is you have to take other peoples views into consideration as well.
I'm pretty sure this lady was as discreet as she could be, no woman wants everyone staring at her while she is feeding her baby.

IcedJade

I wonder Cheeky Girl. Are you going to research breastfeeding versus Formula feeding before you ever give birth? Or will you mindlessly follow tradition of a culture regardless of the best interest of your new baby?

Then (lets say) once you have choosen to breastfeed you realise very very few places have an area available to feed your child and in fact people are offended when you discreetly feed your baby while you eat. Then the awkward stares of ignorant people around cause your milk to not let down properly which inturn causes your infant to be upset and frustrated.

Later thats leads you to staying home more for the best interest of your child so that they can feed in a loving warm environment.

You need inform yourself Cheeky Girl? Breastfeeding is natural. All women have milk at the end of pregnancy because thats what the body expects next.... To feed their baby.

I am all for what suits the baby and mom best. An excepting attitude is needed so badly in Ireland. Let people have their choices and turn your eye if it is offensive to you.

How do you feel about your reaction now that you've had time to think about it?

ilovesleep

hondasam wrote: »

I meant give the baby a drink from a bottle which most mothers do between feeds. I don't know what age this baby is. Expressing milk and feeding with a bottle is common also even for mothers who breastfeed.

Yes, that is true but you do not know what the circumstances are of another person - a stranger - she may not have had time to express milk into a bottle that morning.

hairyprincess

Cheeky_gal wrote: »

Was out for lunch in a very busy restaurant today and a woman at the table next to us started breast feeding. Couldn't believe it. I thought it was so ignorant. I looked around at people's reactions and everyone seemed shocked. Obviously it's not something people haven't seen before, but in a restaurant while people are eating?

There's a time and a place.

I wonder if the majority of people feel this way. Going by people's facial expressions in the restaurant they weren't too impressed.

It's a restaurant, people eat there..................duh :rolleyes:

iguana

hondasam wrote: »

Babies do not just get hungry,mothers have a good idea when the next feed is due and plan accordingly.

The standard medical advice now given is to feed on demand not to have set meal times as it's better for the child in numerous ways. As for feeding with a bottle, no most breastfeeding mothers do not express and carry a bottle of their own milk around with them. What would be the point of that? It would confuse the baby and disrupt their milk supply. They express for other people to feed when they aren't there.

hondasam

ceadaoin. wrote: »

Eh,Babies do just get hungry sometimes. If they are having a growth spurt they might want to feed every hour. Anyway maybe the mother knew the baby was due a feed so she went to the restaurant to sit down and do it. She probably didn't expect such backwards attitudes from other diners.

Do small babies have growth spurts? I would imagine if the child was more than a year old it would be eating solid food.

Kirby

The issue is the weird double standard that it would appear 90% of the thread are ignoring.

If the woman in question had her breasts on display without a baby, she would be making some people uncomfortable and would probably be asked to leave. Or she could be arrested for public indecency. Why does a baby suddenly make it perfectly okay?

Is The OP being overly-sensitive and a bit of a dramatic ninny? Probably. But a person has the right to have a bit of dinner without another person in the place exposing themselves.

Personally, I'm fine with it. Doesn't bother me at all. But I completely understand if it bothered other people and I also understand why some people find it inappropriate. It's not difficult to understand and alot of people in the thread are just being obtuse for the sake of it and in traditional After Hours fashion are just crapping all over the OP.

hondasam

iguana wrote: »

The standard medical advice now given is to feed on demand not to have set meal times as it's better for the child in numerous ways. As for feeding with a bottle, no most breastfeeding mothers do not express and carry a bottle of their own milk around with them. What would be the point of that? It would confuse the baby and disrupt their milk supply. They express for other people to feed when they aren't there.

I said to give the baby a drink of water in a bottle, babies need drinks sometimes between feeds. I understand not all mothers express milk or carry a bottle with them.

rainbowtrout

Bobby42 wrote: »

I can never understand people's outrage with breastfeeding.
What was the mother supposed to do?
Her infant was hungry, was she supposed to put the sensitivities and feelings of the strangers in the restaurant ahead her own child's needs?
Next time you see breastfeeding in public and you're "outraged" just remember that the infant and his or her needs are more important that your personal comfort. So look away, the situation will blow over in a few minutes.

I can't understand it either. It's the most natural thing in the world. Most women that breastfeed just get on with it and certainly don't draw attention to themselves mainly because there are people out there who find it so shocking, disgusting etc.

Actually what I find so bizarre is that there tends to be more outrage about women breastfeeding in public than there is about people having sex in public and I can tell you I've seen more people having sex in nightclubs than I've seen women breastfeeding in restaurants, yet it seems to be breastfeeding that draws more outrage from a certain cohort in society. The mind boggles.

ck83

hondasam wrote: »

Princess Peach wrote: »

But why should she have to try feeding her baby with a bottle? She has chosen to breastfeed, for many reasons that are proven beneficial for both mother and baby.

I don't understand this issue at all. We have all seen boobs, we have all seen babies. I don't know what the deal is.

I meant give the baby a drink from a bottle which most mothers do between feeds. I don't know what age this baby is. Expressing milk and feeding with a bottle is common also even for mothers who breastfeed.

I'm breastfeeding my baby.
Firstly, If I express a feed, it can take anything up to three days to get enough. When I manage that, it's nice to leave it for someone else to give him, so I can actually go out for a few hours.
Secondly, expressed milk only keeps for a certain length of time when it's not in a fridge. Maybe it wouldn't have been practical for that lady to do that, even if she did want it.
Thirdly, maybe that baby refuses to take milk from a bottle.
Finally, if someone chooses to breastfeed that's their choice, and there's nothing wrong with it, no matter where they choose to do it.

dark crystal

hondasam wrote: »

I know and I'm not having a go at the mother at all, if she is happy and comfortable then that's what matters but I suppose what I'm saying is you have to take other peoples views into consideration as well.

Why should the mother give two sh!ts about what one or two prudes think about her feeding her child.

In 2012, why should anyone still be so backward as to be shocked at seeing a woman breastfeeding. It beggars belief!

iguana

hondasam wrote: »

I said to give the baby a drink of water in a bottle, babies need drinks sometimes between feeds. I understand not all mothers express milk or carry a bottle with them.

Again no. If the baby is hungry what good will water do?

ilovesleep

hondasam wrote: »

I know and I'm not having a go at the mother at all, if she is happy and comfortable then that's what matters but I suppose what I'm saying is you have to take other peoples views into consideration as well.
I'm pretty sure this lady was as discreet as she could be, no woman wants everyone staring at her while she is feeding her baby.

She doesn't have to take anyone elses views into consideration at all.

Do some women getting dressed for a night out take other peoples views into consideration when it comes to showing off cleavage.

Fact of the matter is you will see more boobs on a saturday night in town and that's with their clothes on than you you will ever see from a woman breastfeeding.

JONJO THE MISER

That unreal, i would of complained to the Manager.

Jess16

I have no issue with women needing to breastfeed in public, however I do feel that there are certain environments that adults should be able to enjoy exclusively as adults, without having children present. Restaurants are one of these places.

It's expensive to eat out and people generally do so for the experience, to enjoy the food and ambience in adult company. It is not appropriate for people to haul their children to adult environments and expect everybody else to tolerate it and I am tired of people assuming that being a parent is a get-out clause to do what you want.

Non-parents preferences deserve equal respect and consideration too and in my experience, it's precisely members of the Yummy Mummy brigade who are only too happy to complain when something irks them.

Dudess

Kirby wrote: »

The issue is the weird double standard that it would appear 90% of the thread are ignoring.

If the woman in question had her breasts on display without a baby, she would be making some people uncomfortable and would probably be asked to leave. Or she could be arrested for public indecency. Why does a baby suddenly make it perfectly okay?

Hell yeah, just an auld baby. A mere accessory really...

But to answer you: because her tits are covered and the baby needs to be fed? You're not SERIOUSLY comparing subtly feeding a baby via the breast and covered up as much as possible - to public nudity are you?

The exposed breasts are in the OP's head.

Nope, people aren't being obtuse for the sake of it.

LETHAL LADY

Unless the woman stood up and started shooting breastmilk at all the customers or the child was aged about ten (bitty) I really see no reason for offence, are people nowadays that backward.