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Child Item

Weekend Drinking = Alcoholic

luckyfrank

I dont drink weekdays ever but i do enjoy drinking saterday and sunday and getting pissed im a merry drunk, but my other half nags the bollix out of me,im not out in the pub im at home, i provide for everything

Do i deserve this ?

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CiaranC

starbelgrade wrote: »

When a habit becomes a dependency then it becomes an addiction.

Of course.

Its perfectly possible to remain in the first bracket though, the huge majority of people do comfortably. Its silly to suggest than one automatically leads to the other or that the act of drinking beer every weekend defines you as an alchoholic. This sort of thing distorts and distracts from real addiction issues.

dark crystal

CiaranC wrote: »

Its perfectly possible to remain in the first bracket though, the huge majority of people do comfortably. Its silly to suggest than one automatically leads to the other or that the act of drinking beer every weekend defines you as an alchoholic. This sort of thing distorts and distracts from real addiction issues.

The act of drinking beer every weekend doesn't define you as an alcoholic, you're right.

The act of drinking 24 cans of beer in order to get p!ssed every single weekend, affecting your relationship in the process, just might.

It's also a really sh!t example to be setting to his kids. I don't know one child who enjoys watching their mum or dad regularly getting drunk or seeing their dad with a can in his hand all weekend. I know, because I was one of those kids.

Caraville

Op, dress it up any way you like, but 12 cans in one day, whilst they mightn't make you feel pissed, is still not safe or healthy.

If I had a friend who was drinking like that I'd be really worried about him, and I'd be doubly worried if he had children.

Could you not find some other way to relax or pass the time? There's no way I'd put up with a husband/partner who sat around drinking all day on a Saturday, and I'm a very laid-back girlfriend. Surely there's something else you could be doing with your children at the weekend? What are they doing when you're drinking?

CiaranC

dark crystal wrote: »

The act of drinking beer every weekend doesn't define you as an alcoholic, you're right.

The act of drinking 24 cans of beer in order to get p!ssed every single weekend, affecting your relationship in the process, just might.

It's also a really sh!t example to be setting to his kids. I don't know one child who enjoys watching their mum or dad regularly getting drunk or seeing their dad with a can in his hand all weekend. I know, because I was one of those kids.

Totally agree with you, its completely irresponsible behaviour.

ceadaoin.

You spend all day drinking until you are pissed, then you fall into bed. It's actually quite a pathetic way to spend your weekend. And the worse part is your kids are seeing all this.

You said that your own father is an alcoholic so you probably witnessed this sort of behaviour from him too. Now you think it's normal for a parent to drink all day rather than spend quality time with his kids. It's not normal.

If drinking is causing problems in your life, which by the sounds of things it is, then you have a drinking problem.

Frank Black

This may be a secondary concern OP, but 12 cans of cider is over 2,500calories which exceeds the daily recommended amount for a male.

If as you say, you eating as per normal on a Saturday and Sunday as well, I suspect you are well over the amount of calories you should be consuming.

Would you consider yourself overweight?

TBH, even if you're not an alcoholic, what you're doing to your body in terms of alcohol and calorie intake sounds pretty unhealthy.

ChubbyHubby

luckyfrank wrote: »

kids are in bed since 8, f-off to everyone with the kids thing everyone here is holier than thou, my kids have everything

If you drink in front of the kids then it's pretty irresponsible. Sounds like you don't but your wife can't be happy if the only alone time she has with you at the weekend is watching you get drunk. What does your wife do when the kids are in bed and you are drinking? Sounds like she's just unhappy, wants attention etc.

finty

ICD-10 Diagnostic guidelines

A definite diagnosis of dependence should usually be made only if three or more of the following have been present together at some time during the previous year:

A strong desire or sense of compulsion to take the substance;

probable but we'll leave you off on this one

Difficulties in controlling substance-taking behaviour in terms of its onset, termination, or levels of use;

probable too, but we'll leave you off on this one

A physiological withdrawal state when substance use has ceased or have been reduced, as evidenced by: the characteristic withdrawal syndrome for the substance; or use of the same (or closely related) substance with the intention of relieving or avoiding withdrawal symptoms;

check, we've seen a post about "dying" from drinking at the weekend

Evidence of tolerance, such that increased doses of the psychoactive substance are required in order to achieve effects originally produced by lower doses (clear examples of this are found in alcohol- and opiate-dependent individuals who may take daily doses sufficient to incapacitate or kill nontolerant users);

check, 12 cans to get "merry"........thats a problem

Progressive neglect of alternative pleasures or interests because of psychoactive substance use, increased amount of time necessary to obtain or take the substance or to recover from its effects;

check, spending the weekend sitting in the house boozing

Persisting with substance use despite clear evidence of overtly harmful consequences, such as harm to the liver through excessive drinking, depressive mood states consequent to periods of heavy substance use, or drug-related impairment of cognitive functioning; efforts should be made to determine that the user was actually, or could be expected to be, aware of the nature and extent of the harm.

check, harmful to relationship with wife. Acknowledges health consequences. History of Drink-driving arrest

danslevent

Frank you might feel ganged up on with everyone pushing you to realise your problem but I think most people in Ireland have been affected or had close ones affected by alcoholism, either by dealing with family member or friends. It truly is a horrible condition and I hope you seek help...

MagicSean

Having read the ops other thread about his other half cheating I wondered if that incident drove him to drink or if his drinking was a reason his other half cheated. The fact that he was in a drunken coma when she did would indicate to me that his drinking is costing him a lot more than he'd like to admit.

It's not about wether he drinks too much or not (he does). The fact is that he drinks constantly while caring for his kids and to such an extent that his other half appears to have little love for him. If that's not a drink problem I don't know what is.

Shenshen

luckyfrank wrote: »

I dont drink weekdays ever but i do enjoy drinking saterday and sunday and getting pissed im a merry drunk, but my other half nags the bollix out of me,im not out in the pub im at home, i provide for everything

Do i deserve this ?

Yes.

luckyfrank

Anyways........ ive came to an arrangement with the OH ill only drink every 2nd weekend, keeps everyone happy

Spunge

yeah just stick with the heroin every 2nd week

opinion guy

luckyfrank wrote: »

Anyways........ ive came to an arrangement with the OH ill only drink every 2nd weekend, keeps everyone happy

Good luck frank
Come back and let us know in like a month or two how ye get on (if you feel like it that is!)

Caraville

luckyfrank wrote: »

Anyways........ ive came to an arrangement with the OH ill only drink every 2nd weekend, keeps everyone happy

To be fair, I don't think it's the fact that you drink every weekend that worries people. It's the amount in one day. You could actually drink every night and I wouldn't be worried so long as it was one small glass of wine or similar small amount. Every second weekend is an improvement, but I still wouldn't be happy with my partner/husband drinking that much in one sitting, even if it was every second weekend.

But I don't think I'll ever convince you of that.

mikedragon32

Wonder if Dad of the year had his dozen cans of ladycider earlier...

Eric Cartman

OP , your wife sounds like a nag to be fair , I dont know what the other posters are saying here , but i think we should go drinking sometime

luckyfrank

mikedragon32 wrote: »

Wonder if Dad of the year had his dozen cans of ladycider earlier...

havnt touched a drop this week, will get ****-faced paddys day

Auldloon

Luckyfrank can't believe the crap you have had thrown at you in this thread. Mikedragon's post above a perfect example. As for the person who searched through your past posts....what a saddo.

Well done at having a weekend off, keep it up.

opinion guy

luckyfrank wrote: »

havnt touched a drop this week, will get ****-faced paddys day

How does it feel not drinking on the weekend ?

Immaculate Pasta

mikedragon32 wrote: »

Wonder if Dad of the year had his dozen cans of ladycider earlier...

A bit provocative no? And by a mod as well! Good effort! I love this forum

:cool:

luckyfrank

opinion guy wrote: »

How does it feel not drinking on the weekend ?

feels great walking the dog x2 everyday losing weight, went to howth today with the kids had something to eat walked the pier, the way ive dealt with it is to go on a long walk, takes your mind off drinkin, movie for tonight cosy cosy

opinion guy

luckyfrank wrote: »

feels great walking the dog x2 everyday losing weight, went to howth today with the kids had something to eat walked the pier, the way ive dealt with it is to go on a long walk, takes your mind off drinkin, movie for tonight cosy cosy

Sounds great man! Was in Howth yesterday myself for first time in donkeys years - great place for hiking etc. Couldn't resist the Beshoff's chips mind you :P

luckyfrank

opinion guy wrote: »

Sounds great man! Was in Howth yesterday myself for first time in donkeys years - great place for hiking etc. Couldn't resist the Beshoff's chips mind you :P

yeah markets a good on a sunday bloody stream does nice grub, crab sandwich and soup cant beat it

jluv

dark crystal wrote: »

Sure, you're just as bad by stating he 'IS NOT' an alcoholic. No one except those directly privy to the OP's case can diagnose whether he is a 'REAL' alcoholic or not. I'll say this, though - he ticks a lot of the boxes.

Anyway, without saying too much else on the matter, going by some of the OP's historic posts, I would have serious concerns about his drinking and the effect it's had and is having on his life.

Based on what I am reading here(and only what I am reading here) I think he has a alcohol problem in that he has made his view of an enjoyable weekend as having a few(12 i know)drinks and then calling quits on it on a mon morning. I actually think that for whatever reason he has just become in the HABIT of drinking at the weekend. Now I am only basing this on what I'm reading. In my opinion if he was an alcoholic he would not contain his drinking to the weekend. He would not be able. Glad to see you are making changes. Changing the habit perhaps...