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Dumb/Great Facebook Status {merge} [No Names]

Jaafa

I saw my fair share of these before I deactivated my account.

One of the worst came from an american 'friend'(?) of mine.

She said and I quote:
"Ughhh so stupid...I have to get a visa to go to south america! I mean seriously isn't this the UNITED sates! Ahhhhh....Worst state ever!"

She was promptly removed from my friends list.

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internet of cats

hope ur ok hun

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Apanachi

Ok, so here's the next person who's going to getblocked from my newsfeed, her latest status:

"Ima little teapot short and fat heres my dildo heres my twat"

What is wrong with some people?

hefferboi

This is one of the worst:
"wont be alone for valentine's day .. FINALLY ! : D . ; **"

newbee22

hefferboi wrote: »

This is one of the worst:
"wont be alone for valentine's day .. FINALLY ! : D . ; **"

Oh dear god!!

mfceiling

hefferboi wrote: »

This is one of the worst:
"wont be alone for valentine's day .. FINALLY ! : D . ; **"

Nothing like smacking of desperation!!

I've cousins in England who post daily about how great their kids are and how amazing their husbands are (who then comment on that)....attention seeking fcuk bags looking for comments.

My aunt (their mum) has some kind of bone cancer...cue 3 weeks of "love you mum" posts and stuff like "we'll get through this as a family"....when asked by "friends" what the problem was, they replied with "rather not talk about it"

Eh, why the fcuk are you putting cryptic clues on Facebook then??

Chorcai

membersonly wrote: »

That is the worst on this thread so far.

Think I can top it with this...

A: hey boo boo..missin u so much (sadface) wish i was der 2make u feel better..keep well rested til i get hme bbe..i love u more than t sun moon n stars!!!♥ xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Hey chucken, I miss you loads 2 can't wait 4 u 2 come home its been way 2 long (sadface), gavin found my wallet thank god, I love you mucho millions loadza many much 2 boo xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx.

A: no way yay

smile 4me chucken!!!xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

‎:D big smiles

4 u babe xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx.

A: good babe

my does love u haha xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

No no neooooooooo that's my sayin!! U cansh take it from me! MY DOES LOVE YOU 2 Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

A: i said it 1st :P haha o would love sum of ur tlc ri nw even thou ur t one dat needs it ha xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Cmere ta me n well have a cosy day could do with it, what's goin on with ur page likin things?? Buzz me in abit if u can?? Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

____________________________

serious day with my boo ( apart from the whole alarm thingy goin off)!!!! but yuss i went shoppin i stuck it out lads pheeeeeeeeeeeeeeew!!!! im still alive! serioulsy leep when i gosh home n woke up 2a munch ready 4 me

( now thats the way the cookie crumbles)!!!

i love you

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

A: haha ah sure i have 2luk after u boo

ha yeh u had a serious day lukin at my arse in dresses if i recall (im diggin ur arse in dat):P haha

love u babe xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Hmmmmmmmm yuss esp the white 1 beeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeend over darlin!! Haw haw love you 2 boo, u up?? Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx.

A:haha shnaaaaaaaaaaaake

love it ha..ehhh yeh i am nw :P xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

seee its not my fault the mirror was rysh there otay!!, bout time ya lazy ****er!!:P xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

A: ssssssssssssshhhhhhhhhh im very sick otay (sadface) xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

my ickle ole baby is all sicky (sadface) what welse can i do 2 make u feel better

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

________

I've hidden everything they update now, a little bit of me dies everytime I go and look at their page.

lol had to remove a few of the purple sadfaces

(You have included 19 images in your message. You are limited to using 15 images so please go back and correct the problem and then continue again.)

KKkitty

Chorcai wrote: »

membersonly wrote: »

That is the worst on this thread so far.

Think I can top it with this...

A: hey boo boo..missin u so much (sadface) wish i was der 2make u feel better..keep well rested til i get hme bbe..i love u more than t sun moon n stars!!!♥ xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Hey chucken, I miss you loads 2 can't wait 4 u 2 come home its been way 2 long (sadface), gavin found my wallet thank god, I love you mucho millions loadza many much 2 boo xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx.

A: no way yay smile 4me chucken!!!xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

‎:D big smiles 4 u babe xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx.

A: good babe my does love u haha xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

No no neooooooooo that's my sayin!! U cansh take it from me! MY DOES LOVE YOU 2 Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

A: i said it 1st :P haha o would love sum of ur tlc ri nw even thou ur t one dat needs it ha xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Cmere ta me n well have a cosy day could do with it, what's goin on with ur page likin things?? Buzz me in abit if u can?? Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

____________________________

serious day with my boo ( apart from the whole alarm thingy goin off)!!!! but yuss i went shoppin i stuck it out lads pheeeeeeeeeeeeeeew!!!! im still alive! serioulsy leep when i gosh home n woke up 2a munch ready 4 me ( now thats the way the cookie crumbles)!!! i love you xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

A: haha ah sure i have 2luk after u boo ha yeh u had a serious day lukin at my arse in dresses if i recall (im diggin ur arse in dat):P haha love u babe xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Hmmmmmmmm yuss esp the white 1 beeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeend over darlin!! Haw haw love you 2 boo, u up?? Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx.

A:haha shnaaaaaaaaaaaake love it ha..ehhh yeh i am nw :P xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

seee its not my fault the mirror was rysh there otay!!, bout time ya lazy ****er!!:P xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

A: ssssssssssssshhhhhhhhhh im very sick otay (sadface) xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

my ickle ole baby is all sicky (sadface) what welse can i do 2 make u feel better xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

________

I've hidden everything they update now, a little bit of me dies everytime I go and look at their page.

lol had to remove a few of the purple sadfaces

(You have included 19 images in your message. You are limited to using 15 images so please go back and correct the problem and then continue again.)

Oh dear god my eyes hurt after reading that. Do they not have phones to keep in touch to save others from that total and utter pukefest.

[Deleted User]

Have to say hate statuses which announce time for a friend cull or clear up my friends lists . Followed by loads of friends oh please dont delete me . Who cares ? Ugh

IvyTheTerrible

catthinkin wrote: »

Have to say hate statuses which announce time for a friend cull or clear up my friends lists . Followed by loads of friends oh please dont delete me . Who cares ? Ugh

I delete people that put up notices of culls. It's the height of dickery.

Dravokivich

Apanachi wrote: »

Ok, so here's the next person who's going to getblocked from my newsfeed, her latest status:

"Ima little teapot short and fat heres my dildo heres my twat"

What is wrong with some people?

Can't get the ride obviously. :pac:

Dan133269

mfceiling wrote: »

Taken:o

Girl from home who posts a minimum 10 times a day

One example - it's time this princess went to bed to dream of her prince charming

She's single and 35......

I recently figured out one of my facebook contacts had broken up with her boyfriend purely from the pictures she was sharing. You know them ones with a motto or something in them - "Never waste your time with dishonest people, you are too good for their company" and all that jazz.

Another contact has been updating her profile the last while with all these captions along the lines of:

- "I'm an individual, making my own choices in life, some disagree, but I'm unique and that's the most important"

- "The perfect man doesn't exist, all men are selfish sex-obsessed slobs, the perfect woman however, does exist"

- "Never regret anything in your life, it's those experiences that made you into the strong, confident endearing woman you are today."

- "Before you judge me, walk a mile in my shoes, then you will understand how I feel and why I do things the way I do"

She is a morbidly obese single mother in her 40s living in a council house, and working odd jobs for the past 20 years with no further education than school.

The King of Moo

A Facebook friend ("OP" below) recently shared an anti animal-cruelty poster on their wall. Fair enough, I hate animal cruelty as much as anyone else.

But then the following exchange unfolded in the comments.
Words fail me...

OP'S FRIEND: Its been a very mild winter which means a load of flies this year that need killing !

OP: Flies are not Animals OP'S FRIEND:....they are insects!

OP'S FRIEND: So Cats and Dogs are not animals, they are mammals ???

OP: No!!!! whales and dolphins are mammals...Cats and dogs are Animals...

OP'S FRIEND:: OP WHAT ARE YOU ON !!! LOL Animals are any living things other than plants, from some Bacteria to ourselves, human beings !!! Birds, Mammals, Insects, Reptiles, Amphibians etc. etc. are all animals !

OP: Ya I know but these are not the kind of animals that get beaten or abandoned by stupid people....every body kills a fly or any insect,,,, there is no law to say save the flies like....I haven't see or heard protesters or animal activists..Saying same the bacteria..ha.....Thats what I'm on about OP'S FRIEND:.....!

OP'S FRIEND: Unfortunately you don't get protesters and animal rights activists saying "Save the bacteria or save the creepy crawlies" because most of them are not trying to protest about cruelty to animals, just the ones that they like. Fighting for the rights of animals everywhere should mean just that and not just the cute cuddly ones. And any animal that comes into my house making a buzzing sound and annoying certainly stands the chance of getting a beating or being gassed! LOL

OP'S FRIEND: I AM NOT IN FAVOUR OF BLATANT CRUELTY TO ANIMALS !! before anyone jumps on me for that. I'm just making the point that self survival has to come first. We have to eat for one, so yes, we do kill animals to survive (unless you're a vegitarian, and there's nothing wrong with that). If a tiger's hungry and you happen to walk passed be sure he'll eat you .... Self survival, its the rule of the animal kingdom.

OP: Ya I get your point...Im talking about animals ,mammals, epecially Cats dogs all Gods creatures...You know me OP'S FRIEND:...

blatantrereg

The King of Moo wrote: »

A Facebook friend ("OP" below) recently shared an anti animal-cruelty poster on their wall. Fair enough, I hate animal cruelty as much as anyone else.

But then the following exchange unfolded in the comments.
Words fail me...

Some people seem to take any concern for animal rights as a personal affront - outside of someone beating their pet or something like that. They react by trying to undermine ideas about it - usually from an uninformed or highly biased standpoint. I think it comes from repressed guilt.

One such argument I found particularly irritating recently for some reason: That you should eat meat - so that the lambs get a chance for a [short] life gamboling in a field.

I think it was the word 'gamboling' that was so irritating

dan1895

blatantrereg wrote: »

The King of Moo wrote: »

A Facebook friend ("OP" below) recently shared an anti animal-cruelty poster on their wall. Fair enough, I hate animal cruelty as much as anyone else.

But then the following exchange unfolded in the comments.
Words fail me...

Some people seem to take any concern for animal rights as a personal affront - outside of someone beating their pet or something like that. They react by trying to undermine ideas about it - usually from an uninformed or highly biased standpoint. I think it comes from repressed guilt.

One such argument I found particularly irritating recently for some reason: That you should eat meat - so that the lambs get a chance for a [short] life gamboling in a field.

I think it was the word 'gamboling' that was so irritating

Why does the word "gamboling" remind me of George Hook?

Ah that fecking sky ad!!!!!

token101

Know this guy, who's not a bad guy, but who was constantly posting stupid s*** like above 'Wuv u my wuvly' and all that f**king nonsense on his girlfriends wall. When his girlfriend FINALLY dumped him and he updated his relationship status, followed by 'Pure gutted', one of my buddies posted the Streets 'Dry your Eyes' video on his wall almost instantly. I had to dry my eyes after all the laughing

MintyDoris

Sorry all, I know it's late but the girls are top banter tonight so only remembering to do this now xx — with XXXX XXXXXX and 3 others at XXXXX.

NO ONE CARES!

Laura_lolly87

the minute i saw this I thought of this thread and the worst thing is 3 people liked it :eek:

Boy: I Really Like You; Will You Please Go Out With Me...?
Girl: Yes.
Boy: What?!?
Girl: Yes.
Boy: YES!
*Girl Starts To Fall For The Boy*
*Exactly One Month Later*
Girl's friend: I Think It`s Time You Two Broke Up.!
Girl: Okay..{Secretly Doesn`t Want To But Is Too Afraid Her Friend Will Hate Her If She Says No.}

Boy: Hey.
Girl: Hi.
Boy: How's it going?
Girl: It's fine.
Boy: What's wrong?
Girl: I think we should break up..
Boy: What..?
Girl: We should break up.
Boy: Why..?
Girl: It`s Just... We Never See Each Other Anymore/:
Boy: I can change that.
Girl: I've never met your family..
Boy: I can change that.
Girl: I just don't feel that way for you anymore..
Boy: I wish I could change that.
Girl: I'm sorry.
Boy: I know.
Girl: I Have To Go..
Boy: Thanks for trying..
{Next day:}
Boy: Hey.
Girl: I'm sorry..
Boy: No I'm happy we broke up I could tell we weren't going anywhere too.
Girl: Okay.../;

{next year:}

Girl: (Playing their song) I like him.I have since we first started dating,but I can't tell him;I can't tell anybody.

{next* year:}

Boy: (Has A New Girlfriend)
Girl: (Playing their song) I like him...I still do...but I can't tell him,I can't tell anybody.
{next year:}

Boy: (Him And His Girlfriend Break Upp)
Girl: I Like You. I Always Have -&&- Always Will!
Boy: I'm Sorry, I Like Someone Else.
Girl: (Runs Away Cryingg.)

{The next day:}
Boy: (Finds a note in his locker)

Note: I Told You I Like You, But I Was Wrong. I Meant I Love You; But You Don`t Love Me. I Wish I Could Change That. I`m Sorry For That Day Back whn we broke up. I Really Didn`t Want To. I`m Gone Now, I`ve Been Sick For A While Now.. But The Time You Read This I`ll Be In The Hospital On Life Support. I Just Needed To Tell You Before I`m one. I Love You♥ Don`t Forget That!!(:

Boy: (Stares At The Paper For A Long Time And Runs Down The Hall, He Went To Her House, But She Wasn`t Home.)

{The next day:}
Boy: (Goes To The Hospital And Tells The Nurse Who He Wants To See)
Nurse: It seems she checked out yesterday.
Boy: She's better?
Nurse: I'm afraid not. She had cancer and she passed away yesterday. I'm sorry.
Boy: (stares at the floor, he runs out the door and down the street)

{The Next Day, At Her Funeral!)
Boy: (Asks to speak)
Boy: A Few Days Ago I Received A Note From Her. (He Reads The Note) And I Wanted To Tell Her Before She Left That I Loved Her, I Love Her. I Loved Her For A Long Time; And There Is Nothing I Can Do Now.! -Nothing-
All I Can Say Is I Love You, And Now Your Gone.... I Wish I Could Change That.!
Boy: (Starts Crying And So Does Everyone Else.)
~
The Boy Ends Up Marrying Her Friend Who Told Her To Break Up With Him In The First Place. When He Found Out What She Had Done, He Killed Himself; To Be With The Girl He Really Loves!♥ He Was 28.
Repost Or You Will Have Bad Luck In Love For 28 Years./:
Repost And Somebody Will Tell You They "Love You" Tomorrow And You Will Get Good News Tonight At Midnight:)
Repost If You Have A Heart And Want To Find A Cure For All Serious Diseases Including Cancer.
Repost For All The People Who Fear Death Is At There Doorstep; Waiting To Go
ANY ONE THAT DONT REPOST THIS HAS NO HEART :'(

merengueca

This is just a snapshot from her. I just think these boys are going to have one or two issues growing up.....(The kids are called Kai and Lex-Thien!!!! FFS)
Do it just fine to show us single mothers . ... Kais headmaster said kai is his star pupil .And if he carries on he is goin right to the top . Mothers doin it for themselves oh yeh that's how this mother rolls !

<H6 class=uiStreamMessage data-ft='{"type":1}'>HAPPY 12TH BIRTHDAY TO THE BESTEST BIG SON KAI,KAI..... love you... my son my best friend ... xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

<H6 class=uiStreamMessage data-ft='{"type":1}'>lexi asleep wow before 8 cani believe now just gota get kai away from his I mac to come watch a film with me again , can't get him away from it !

<H6 class=uiStreamMessage data-ft='{"type":1}'>Get ma lex into bed an me an ma big son r goin to watch a film snuggled in his bed ! With a hot hot vimto :eek:he's 12!!!!

<H6 class=uiStreamMessage data-ft='{"type":1}'>my kai kai is soooo good just gets up gets himself ready and off he goes to north ces , even offered him the day off bcos he wasn't feelin 100 % but no he said I want to go to school . Feels so good knowing ur kids actually want to go and learn . And do well at school . Ya on the right path son ! And who says single parents can't bring up our kids properly ? Single parents rock !

</H6>

</H6>

</H6>

</H6>

Sindri

This thread makes me want to cause pain to a lot of people.

Sindri

Dan133269 wrote: »

I recently figured out one of my facebook contacts had broken up with her boyfriend purely from the pictures she was sharing. You know them ones with a motto or something in them - "Never waste your time with dishonest people, you are too good for their company" and all that jazz.

Another contact has been updating her profile the last while with all these captions along the lines of:

- "I'm an individual, making my own choices in life, some disagree, but I'm unique and that's the most important"

- "The perfect man doesn't exist, all men are selfish sex-obsessed slobs, the perfect woman however, does exist"

- "Never regret anything in your life, it's those experiences that made you into the strong, confident endearing woman you are today."

- "Before you judge me, walk a mile in my shoes, then you will understand how I feel and why I do things the way I do"

She is a morbidly obese single mother in her 40s living in a council house, and working odd jobs for the past 20 years with no further education than school.

From reading that I don't think I'd fit into even one of her shoes.

Richard Hillman

laterssssssss face****ersss ha me going liverpool in an hour enjoy ur weekend people cause i will haha :P

I'd rather be able to string a coherent sentence together than be going to a hole like Liverpool for the weekend.

WoollyRedHat

Facebook just seems to be the big bad brother to Bebo, same stuff just worse

batistuta9

WoollyRedHat wrote: »

Facebook just seems to be the big bad brother to Bebo, same stuff just worse

It's not facebook it's the people, i don't understand why people blame facebook for it

CMpunked

batistuta9 wrote: »

It's not facebook it's the people, i don't understand why people blame facebook for it

I think he just means facebook as an overview term. Like saying "Ireland is in debt". The land mass isn't, the people are.

Either way, yes, Facebook kinda sucks. Whoever invented like pages should have given the ability to remove them indefidently.

El Guapo!

Why the fúck do people try to talk to the dead on Facebook??!!
Ok I know it's sad someone you know died, but every day there's a new post saying "Missing you today" or "Hope you're ok up there" or something stupid.
It's so fukn irritating. I'm pretty sure the dead aren't spending all day on Facebook so you're just clogging up the news feed with shíte talk to someone who's not gonna answer you.

amdublin

Dean09 wrote: »

Why the fúck do people try to talk to the dead on Facebook??!!
Ok I know it's sad someone you know died, but every day there's a new post saying "Missing you today" or "Hope you're ok up there" or something stupid.
It's so fukn irritating. I'm pretty sure the dead aren't spending all day on Facebook so you're just clogging up the news feed with shíte talk to someone who's not gonna answer you.

Yep. Or the ones who talk to their children:

Xxxx is with their dad tonight. I love you so much xxxxx, you are the best son in the world

Or

Happy birthday to my little angel xxxxx, wait until you see your surprise when you get home from school

Your kids aren't on facebook, go away.

arybvtcw0eolkf

IvyTheTerrible wrote: »

I delete people that put up notices of culls. It's the height of dickery.

Excellent idea.

Although I done it last week when I was considering disabling my boards.ie account, then realized I'd some really cool mates from boards.ie on facebook and kept 'em.

El Guapo!

Teagan Enough Wreckage wrote: »

Excellent idea.

Although I done it last week when I was considering disabling my boards.ie account, then realized I'd some really cool mates from boards.ie on facebook and kept 'em.

Why were you gonna delete your Boards account? Gettin bored of it?

Laika1986

Dean09 wrote: »

Why the fúck do people try to talk to the dead on Facebook??!!
Ok I know it's sad someone you know died, but every day there's a new post saying "Missing you today" or "Hope you're ok up there" or something stupid.
It's so fukn irritating. I'm pretty sure the dead aren't spending all day on Facebook so you're just clogging up the news feed with shíte talk to someone who's not gonna answer you.

I couldnt agree more, a friend of mine died suddenly 2 years ago and recently there was like a memorial page created for her. I wasn't too happy about it and it annoyed me why someone would do it. However I then found out it was her little sister who made the page and thought well if it helps her cope with losing her sister then **** it at least it's doing some good

amdublin

Laika1986 wrote: »

I couldnt agree more, a friend of mine died suddenly 2 years ago and recently there was like a memorial page created for her. I wasn't too happy about it and it annoyed me why someone would do it. However I then found out it was her little sister who made the page and thought well if it helps her cope with losing her sister then **** it at least it's doing some good

I don't mind the memorial pages.

It's the people talking to people who've died through their status that gets to me.

Laika1986

amdublin wrote: »

I don't mind the memorial pages.

It's the people talking to people who've died through their status that gets to me.

Yeah i get ya but I get them kind of messages to the page the whole time!very annoying