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Child Item

I'm so broke that..

Akrasia

I can't afford to buy shoes to go to work.

Right now, I'm wearing a pair of shoes that used to belong to my Girlfriend's uncle who died a few months ago. They're about a size too small for me and make a sound like they've been filled with jam whenever I walk anywhere in them but I can't afford to get a better pair.

But, aren't I lucky to have a job.

Does anyone want a game of 'you call that broke... you don't know the meaning of it lad '

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Fart

... I don't have a pot to piss in.

I have a toilet.

Temptamperu

Im so broke I have to get a 32" tv instead of a 48" man my life sucks :pac:

neilthefunkeone

My lunch consisted of Aldi noodles.. 19c a pack!!!

Fart

Temptamperu wrote: »

Im so broke I have to get a 32" tv instead of a 48" man my life sucks :pac:

A 48 inch man? :eek:

Michael D. Higgins.

dahat

I can afford Broadband but not a pair of shoes........:rolleyes:

working fool

I'm getting a sex change and tricking Paul mc cartney into marrying me !

Sunnyisland

I'm so broke Someone saw me kicking a can down the street, and when asked what I was doing I said, "Moving."

the_pits

I'm so broke, I can't even afford to pay attention to this thread.

gamgsam

I had to use water in my tesco value porridge for breakfast lunch and dinner for 3 days a few weeks ago. The temporary poverty was self inflicted however.

Wasn't the worst at all

Fart

gamgsam wrote: »

I had to use water in my tesco value porridge for breakfast lunch and dinner for 3 days a few weeks ago. The temporary poverty was self inflicted however.

Wasn't the worst at all

You should have used Tesco value water too; it's cheaper.

Tazz T

...the budget will make absolutely no difference to my personal circumstances.

xsiborg

posting from my iphone 4 because im so broke i cant get the iphone 4S, boo hoo... :eek:

*really i wouldnt go anywhere near iproducts with a forty foot bargepole!

sensibleken

Im so broke i had to sell my skin to the chinese takeaway for won ton pastry so i could aford a chow mein.

Akrasia

dahat wrote: »

I can afford Broadband but not a pair of shoes........:rolleyes:

I need the broadband so I can play COD Black Ops online

but I'm so poor I can only afford a poxy wii to play it on

ilovesleep

I'm so broke that I didn't buy runners in 15 months and there's deep holes in the soles of my current runners.

And my socks are wet!

Oh and I didn't eat properly since summer.

Fart

I'm so broke that I now have to resort to using my housemates butter.

For spreading onto bread.

My name is URL

We should set up a benevolence fund for AH posters who have fallen on hard times.. I'm too poor to contribute towards it though.

aaronjumper

I'm so poor, people break into my house and leave money.

:cool:

ojola

So freaking broke I can afford the ferry home for me not to talk of the car or even the petrol to drive to the ferry port. So broke that swimming home is an option....

ojola

ojola wrote: »

So freaking broke I can afford the ferry home for me not to talk of the car or even the petrol to drive to the ferry port. So broke that swimming home is an option....

ojola

My name is URL wrote: »

We should set up a benevolence fund for AH posters who have fallen on hard times.. I'm too poor to contribute towards it though.

We need a fund manager I nominate you;)

smokingman

FIRST YORKSHIREMAN:
Aye, very passable, that, very passable bit of risotto.
SECOND YORKSHIREMAN:
Nothing like a good glass of Château de Chasselas, eh, Josiah?
THIRD YORKSHIREMAN:
You're right there, Obadiah.
FOURTH YORKSHIREMAN:
Who'd have thought thirty year ago we'd all be sittin' here drinking Château de Chasselas, eh?
FIRST YORKSHIREMAN:
In them days we was glad to have the price of a cup o' tea.
SECOND YORKSHIREMAN:
A cup o' cold tea.
FOURTH YORKSHIREMAN:
Without milk or sugar.
THIRD YORKSHIREMAN:
Or tea.
FIRST YORKSHIREMAN:
In a cracked cup, an' all.
FOURTH YORKSHIREMAN:
Oh, we never had a cup. We used to have to drink out of a rolled up newspaper.
SECOND YORKSHIREMAN:
The best we could manage was to suck on a piece of damp cloth.
THIRD YORKSHIREMAN:
But you know, we were happy in those days, though we were poor.
FIRST YORKSHIREMAN:
Because we were poor. My old Dad used to say to me, "Money doesn't buy you happiness, son".
FOURTH YORKSHIREMAN:
Aye, 'e was right.
FIRST YORKSHIREMAN:
Aye, 'e was.
FOURTH YORKSHIREMAN:
I was happier then and I had nothin'. We used to live in this tiny old house with great big holes in the roof.
SECOND YORKSHIREMAN:
House! You were lucky to live in a house! We used to live in one room, all twenty-six of us, no furniture, 'alf the floor was missing, and we were all 'uddled together in one corner for fear of falling.
THIRD YORKSHIREMAN:
Eh, you were lucky to have a room! We used to have to live in t' corridor!
FIRST YORKSHIREMAN:
Oh, we used to dream of livin' in a corridor! Would ha' been a palace to us. We used to live in an old water tank on a rubbish tip. We got woke up every morning by having a load of rotting fish dumped all over us! House? Huh.
FOURTH YORKSHIREMAN:
Well, when I say 'house' it was only a hole in the ground covered by a sheet of tarpaulin, but it was a house to us.
SECOND YORKSHIREMAN:
We were evicted from our 'ole in the ground; we 'ad to go and live in a lake.
THIRD YORKSHIREMAN:
You were lucky to have a lake! There were a hundred and fifty of us living in t' shoebox in t' middle o' road.
FIRST YORKSHIREMAN:
Cardboard box?
THIRD YORKSHIREMAN:
Aye.
FIRST YORKSHIREMAN:
You were lucky. We lived for three months in a paper bag in a septic tank. We used to have to get up at six in the morning, clean the paper bag, eat a crust of stale bread, go to work down t' mill, fourteen hours a day, week-in week-out, for sixpence a week, and when we got home our Dad would thrash us to sleep wi' his belt.
SECOND YORKSHIREMAN:
Luxury. We used to have to get out of the lake at six o'clock in the morning, clean the lake, eat a handful of 'ot gravel, work twenty hour day at mill for tuppence a month, come home, and Dad would thrash us to sleep with a broken bottle, if we were lucky!
THIRD YORKSHIREMAN:
Well, of course, we had it tough. We used to 'ave to get up out of shoebox at twelve o'clock at night and lick road clean wit' tongue. We had two bits of cold gravel, worked twenty-four hours a day at mill for sixpence every four years, and when we got home our Dad would slice us in two wit' bread knife.
FOURTH YORKSHIREMAN:
Right. I had to get up in the morning at ten o'clock at night half an hour before I went to bed, drink a cup of sulphuric acid, work twenty-nine hours a day down mill, and pay mill owner for permission to come to work, and when we got home, our Dad and our mother would kill us and dance about on our graves singing Hallelujah.
FIRST YORKSHIREMAN:
And you try and tell the young people of today that ..... they won't believe you.
ALL:
They won't!

The Internet Explorer

I'm so broke that I don't even have any money to spend.

ojola

Fart wrote: »

I'm so broke that I now have to resort to using my housemates butter.

For spreading onto bread.

peant butter? If i were you I would "fart" easy to concerve wasting energy

then I would Not have to eat too often. lol

dahat

I'm so broke i have to borrow sugar from my hot neighbour when my wife is in work.....

smash

I'm so broke that I have to adopt kittens to feed my snake because I can't afford frozen rats.

Fart

ojola wrote: »

peant butter? If i were you I would "fart" easy to concerve wasting energy then I would Not have to eat too often. lol

o.O

ojola

smash wrote: »

I'm so broke that I have to adopt kittens to feed my snake because I can't afford frozen rats.

Stuffed snake instead of stuffed turkey for Xmas:D . Fatting the snake up for xmas dinner? good idea..

sensibleken

im so broke the only social life i have is in a hedge with some porn i found.

RichieC

I've three euro in 20 cents and no dinner for me or the dog. the cat has loads of food.

I wonder can dogs eat cat food