Skunkle wrote: » I'm just responding to the OP and mentioning the fact that out of all the single mothers I know every one of them lives with a partner. Perhaps you mistook what I said for "I hate single mothers, they are a drain on society, everyone I know is scamming the system and Its a big deal, why wont someone do something about this". Lets not lose the run of ourselves yeah ?
CorkMan wrote: » I'd glad my partner and I saw that and sorted out the situation pronto.
looky loo wrote: » Why doesnt the social welfare deduct payments from these runaway dads for the upkeep of their children?...seems a good solution to me.
hatrickpatrick wrote: » Until custody courts start treating men and women equally, these arguments are meaningless. I wonder how many "deadbeat dads" would love to spend time with their kids but are being denied it by vindictive exes? We all know at least one guy this has happened to.
Pompey Magnus wrote: » How misogynistic is Ireland when it comes to child custody battles between a father and a mother? On issues with children in Ireland a little bad press for single mothers is a small price for women to pay for the massive advantage their gender affords them when it comes to custody. Why don't we hear more women calling for gender equality when it comes to issues where they hold the advantage?
Bipolar Joe wrote: » My Mother disappeared off the face of the planet when I was about a year old, my Sister's and I ended up living with my Pop and Aunt for five years. All of a sudden she shows up, packs us into a taxi and next thing I know we're in England. Dad wasn't allowed to see us, she got full custody, it took five years before he could, all because the courts favour the Mothers instantly. It's a ridiculously crooked system.
looky loo wrote: » Isnt that kidnapping? Sorry that happened to you awful. I agree men and women should be treated equally in the whole child caring/custody/visitation argument, but the only way you are going to get that is by lobbying the local td, get him to bring it to government and try to bring it into to law.
CorkMan wrote: » I used to work for the social before, some of my duties were to investigate instances of fraud. I did call into houses where there was evidence of an adult male living there, other times not. In many places where there was no evidence of an adult male present, I saw loads of cans on the floor, toddlers screaming because they weren't tended to by their mothers, burnt pizzas in the oven. Disgrace TBH. In one case all of the above was happening in the house. Before I entered the house, I was waiting for the mother to arrive back outside the door, whilst hearing a toddler screaming. The mother came down the road drunk out of her skull talking on the phone. Within a space of about 10 feet, she was stumbling side to side. The other investigator and I entered the house, the stench was unreal. The toddler has not been cleaned, there was gone off food rotting on the counter. Not even in the bin. I'd glad my partner and I saw that and sorted out the situation pronto.
Bipolar Joe wrote: » It wasn't classed as kidnapping because she's the Mother. A percentage of child support goes to the courts and so on, so long as they're getting paid, who cares, right?
wild_cat wrote: » Jesus I'm glad I already don't want children. Reading that would turn you off having children just in case something went wrong relationship wise in the future.
looky loo wrote: » Playing devils advocate here, dont have kids, so its no skin off my nose. No point getting pissy with me..
looky loo wrote: » Title for another thread perhaps, this one is about the fathers that dont input on their childs life.
hinault wrote: » Interesting. Do SW staff have to witness the presence of an adult male living in the same house, in order to prosecute? Or can a neighbour report the presence with of a male in the house with supporting photograhic evidence to the DSW, to commence a prosecution?
hatrickpatrick wrote: » The more I read about how easily vindictive ex wives can screw men over in divorce court, the more convinced I am that while I want to meet a girl and stay with her forever, I don't ever want to sign that wretched contract, at least unless they sort this out. Seems to me the terms are literally, "You must stay together forever*" Small print: If you're the woman and you choose to leave, you can take everything with you. If you're the man and you choose to leave, you must give up everything.
Witchie wrote: » hatrickpatrick wrote: » The more I read about how easily vindictive ex wives can screw men over in divorce court, the more convinced I am that while I want to meet a girl and stay with her forever, I don't ever want to sign that wretched contract, at least unless they sort this out. Seems to me the terms are literally, "You must stay together forever*" Small print: If you're the woman and you choose to leave, you can take everything with you. If you're the man and you choose to leave, you must give up everything. Its not always the case. When I showed my ex the door he didnt bother with his kids and only for me bringing them (along with a packed lunch coz he was too lazy to feed them) to his house for a few hours every week, he wouldnt have seen his then 5 & 2 yr old sons. Then he moved away and didnt see them for almost 3 months until I sent a solicitors letter telling him I was filing for maintenance. He then demanded that he get to see them every 2nd weekend, which he got with no bother from me. Eventually he got another girl pregnant and moved even further away from his sons and started only seeing them once a month. He went on to marry her and have 2 more kids and despite it being written into our divorce that he see them every 2nd weekend, he doesnt bother. Only once in 10 years have I denied him access, and that was because he text my eldest the day before he decided he was going to see them and I had made plans for that weekend and was not dropping them just coz he decided at the last minute to be a dad. I encouraged my sons and even paid for them to travel by bus twice this summer to go spend a week with their family down the country and always make them call their sisters just that and not step-sisters. I always make sure that we get them birthday and christmas presents (including their dad and step-mom) I have done all I can to maintain the relationship with their dad, including varying the maintenance order to €0 when he was on sick leave from work last year and not able to pay anything. Im a softie. I should be a bitch and get him to step up but all I can think of is that will leave 3 little girls with less and I cant do that.
gcgirl wrote: » sounds a lot like my story! Being a parent is 24/7/365 till you outlive them. Tomorrow they are going to their dads brothers wedding I paid for everything he did not pay a cent towards their clothes. And his gonna spend the one day in every 2 weeks tomorrow.
Witchie wrote: » gcgirl wrote: » sounds a lot like my story! Being a parent is 24/7/365 till you outlive them. Tomorrow they are going to their dads brothers wedding I paid for everything he did not pay a cent towards their clothes. And his gonna spend the one day in every 2 weeks tomorrow. Its a head wreck! I often wonder how their step-mother could put up with a guy who was so neglectful of his children never mind have 3 more with him. What if that marriage fails too? Will she be sure he will look after her girls? I couldnt go out with a guy who if he had kids, wasnt a real dad to them unless the mother was stopping him from being so.
Witchie wrote: » Its not always the case. When I showed my ex the door he didnt bother with his kids and only for me bringing them (along with a packed lunch coz he was too lazy to feed them) to his house for a few hours every week, he wouldnt have seen his then 5 & 2 yr old sons. Then he moved away and didnt see them for almost 3 months until I sent a solicitors letter telling him I was filing for maintenance. He then demanded that he get to see them every 2nd weekend, which he got with no bother from me. Eventually he got another girl pregnant and moved even further away from his sons and started only seeing them once a month. He went on to marry her and have 2 more kids and despite it being written into our divorce that he see them every 2nd weekend, he doesnt bother. Only once in 10 years have I denied him access, and that was because he text my eldest the day before he decided he was going to see them and I had made plans for that weekend and was not dropping them just coz he decided at the last minute to be a dad. I encouraged my sons and even paid for them to travel by bus twice this summer to go spend a week with their family down the country and always make them call their sisters just that and not step-sisters. I always make sure that we get them birthday and christmas presents (including their dad and step-mom) I have done all I can to maintain the relationship with their dad, including varying the maintenance order to €0 when he was on sick leave from work last year and not able to pay anything. Im a softie. I should be a bitch and get him to step up but all I can think of is that will leave 3 little girls with less and I cant do that.
