nav[aria-label="Primary Navigation"] { padding: 0; & ul { list-style: none; width: 100%; display: flex; flex-direction: row; justify-content: start; align-items: start; gap: 30px; padding: 0; & li { margin: 0; } & ul li { list-style: none; } } }

Child Item

Kids outside house

Stevo1011

Looking to find a way to stop random kids playing football outside the house,

I have tried talking to them but all i get is abuse back.

I know kids are kids but i cant go through another summer of them kicking the ball against the window.

Are there any ways i could stop them playing outside?

Find more posts tagged with

Quick Links

Comments

Feeona

Buy them a playstation

Penn

No.

Agent Smith

Murder their Parents

Stevo1011

Feeona wrote: »

Buy them a playstation

Looking for advice not sarcastic comments pal

sagat2

Pay some bigger kids to come buy and give them a beating.

wellboy76

Stand naked in the window

sagat2

Sell them Drugs.

bonerm

Stevo1011 wrote: »

Looking for advice not sarcastic comments pal

Buy them a playstation 3.

Feeona

Stevo1011 wrote: »

Looking for advice not sarcastic comments pal

And you didn't think 'Murder their parents' was sarcastic? :pac:

Vain

Do this works 60% of the time every time

Stevo1011

Feeona wrote: »

And you didn't think 'Murder their parents' was sarcastic? :pac:

Ha now that is true in fairness, you win ha

chin_grin

Molest them.

My name is URL

Is there any particular reason that they choose to play outside your house? If kicking ball is all they're doing then there isn't much you can do about it.

mariebeth

challenge them to a water fight & then go in & boil the kettle...

It's the AH - you're going to get sarcastic comments.

CreepingDeath

Stevo1011 wrote: »

Looking to find a way to stop random kids playing football outside the house,

Erect a basketball net.

Sonics2k

Poison the grass.
Do naked Aerobic's by your window.
Paint Pedo Bear on your door.

super_furry

Try to be down with the kids, using the same kind of slang that they do, but talk to them about Jesus and God and whatnot.

hondasam

Stevo1011 wrote: »

Looking to find a way to stop random kids playing football outside the house,

I have tried talking to them but all i get is abuse back.

I know kids are kids but i cant go through another summer of them kicking the ball against the window.

Are there any ways i could stop them playing outside?

lighten up and go play football with them. you might enjoy it.

chicken fingers

Hose them down. Preferably from inside an upstairs window.
They will run away and be pissed, and probably come back to throw rocks at your windows. But if you hose them down with a watergun or hose every time they kick the ball at your windows / car, they wont come back. I did this a couple of times years ago with some kids in my neighborhood.

tldr: blast em with water / piss

bronte

Break their legs.

strobe

I've a few ideas. You can try them separately....or all at once, or mix and match. It's up to you. Not sure of the effectiveness either way.

1. Play music out onto the street. Either classical music, something like The Four Seasons violin concertos by Vivaldi or maybe a mixed play list of songs by well known gays, The Village People, Elton John, Justin Beiber etc. With the classical option they might just find it really annoying and fukk off, with the gay option they might be too embarrassed that people they know will walk past and see them all running around exercising to YMCA and fukk off.

2. Get a few of you mates to come around at night when they are playing and all sit there in your garden on deck chairs having a few beers. Alternate between cheering them on and clapping far too enthusiastically whenever they do something good and laughing and shouting "Taxi!" whenever one of them scuffs a shot or falls on their ass. They will dislike when either is done.

3. Get a borrow of some pretty teenage daughters from your friends or neighbours. Pay them a tenner each to come and watch the lads playing for 15 or 20 minutes and then to start commenting to each other overly loudly that football is really gay and they reckon only homosexuals play it so they get to get all sweaty and hug each other when they score a goal.

4. Go to your nearest Traveler site with 100 euro and buy a few dags. Ask them for right vicious little bastards cause you want to put them in the fights. Release them mid game.

Snakeblood

Stevo1011 wrote: »

Looking to find a way to stop random kids playing football outside the house,

I have tried talking to them but all i get is abuse back.

I know kids are kids but i cant go through another summer of them kicking the ball against the window.

Are there any ways i could stop them playing outside?

Run at them with a baton while wearing a motorcycle helmet.

Results may vary.

Doom

Agent Smith wrote: »

Murder their Parents

Murder the ball:D

CreepingDeath

Stevo1011 wrote: »

I know kids are kids but i cant go through another summer of them kicking the ball against the window.

Each time they hit the ball against your window confiscate it until one of their parents comes around to request it back.

biko

Stevo1011 wrote: »

Looking for advice not sarcastic comments pal

Welcome to After Hours, the Everything Help Desk.

marcsignal

Stevo1011 wrote: »

Are there any ways i could stop them playing outside?

send Cuddles out to play with them :pac:

Captain_Generic

1. Walk out your door.
2. Put both arms straight up in air like this.
3. Run full speed on a winding run towards their football shouting "SERVICE" while keeping your arms above your head.
4. Toe-bog the ball as hard as you can in an arbitrary direction, it doesn't really matter.
5. Return to base.
6. Repeat as necessary.

TanG411

Invite them in.

Sonics2k

In this order:

1. Play a collection of hits from Michael Jackson and Gary Glitter.

2. Stand in your front yard, wearing a stained white vest thats way to small for you, tight y-fronts and sandles with socks.

3. Pick at your belly button whilst muttering to yourself and watching them run around.

4. Wave casually to them whilst smiling.

This should get rid of them*

*it may also result in a visit from the Gardai and an angry mob.

TanG411

Break your windows, or move them higher.