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Child Item

Whats your favourite saying of all time -motivational humourous or otherwise

mkdon

to get the ball rolling

One of mine would be "yesterday was the easy day"

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swarm.of.bees

You can lead a horse to water - but a pencil must be lead.

Funny, cos pencils are actually made from graphite and wood and not lead at all!! How I laughed...

Riddle101

These aren't really saying but some quotes/jokes that I like

After the 1916 Rising, Nancy O' Brien has a few words with her cousin Micheal Collins, as the Risers march through the streets. It's nor really a quote but I like what he says

Nancy O Brien: What will you do now?

Micheal Collins: Do? sure i'll get ready for the next round. I've got all the names all taken down, the besht of min(Best of Men)
...
Mary: What? how are you going to train them?

Micheal: Sure won't his majesty's government train them for me

Also

You can have my gun, when you pry it from my cold dead fingers"- Edgar, Men In Black

"And you will know my name is the LORD, when I strike down apon thee with great vengence and furious anger"-Ezekiel 25:17

"I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil"-The 23rd Psalm
...
"There are four lines of equal length, how long will Kerry Katona be in the bathroom"- Frankie Boyle

"The most scottish thing i've ever seen. I was in this town called, Basque and I saw this guy pissing on a door. He then took out his keys and went inside"- Frankie Boyle

Gracelessly Tom

"We don't stop playing because we get old, we get old because we stop playing" George Bernard Shaw.

carfiosaoorl

When life hands you lemons squirt them in peoples eyes

punchdrunk

Clay Davis,the wire

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-0hjSaYCRnA&feature=related

Savage Tyrant

"Enough is enough! I have had it with these motherfucking snakes on this motherfucking plane"

Taco Corp

There's no such thing as stupid questions, just stupid people.

Copper23

J2D2 wrote: »

"The quickest way to a girl's bed is through her parents. Have sex with them and you're in."

Christ

J2D2

Copper23 wrote: »

Christ

I am the man with no name, Zapp Brannigan at your service.

chrisxii

When someone gives you something "You shouldn't have but I'm really glad you did".:D

bc dub

you are on a rock floating thru space

tony007

My fellow Americans. As a young boy, I dreamed of being a baseball. But tonight I say, we must move forward, not backward; upward, not forward; and always twirling, twirling, twirling towards freedom!

Vicxas

Those two are ridin' on the sly!

sipstrassi

What would you expect from an ass but a kick.

timewilltell

'If he was anymore inbred he'd be a sandwich'

My dad about a man in our area.

sensibleken

stateofflux wrote: »

groucho marx ftw all the way

my 5 personal favs:

"i intend to live forever or die trying'

"I never forget a face, but in your case I'll be glad to make an exception."

"Those are my principles, and if you don't like them... well, I have others"

"Some people claim that marriage interferes with romance. There's no doubt about it. Anytime you have a romance, your wife is bound to interfere."

"I've got a good mind to go out and join a club and beat you over the head with it."

Go! and never darken my towels again!

sensibleken

"Personally, I don't think there's intelligent life on other planets. Why should other planets be any different from this one?"

"I want to die peacefully in my sleep, like my father. Not screaming and terrified like his passengers."

"I can remember when safe sex meant a padded headboard."

"People often think I'm from Kent. I hear them whisper it as I walk past."

---Bob Monkhouse, underapreciated genius

Rebel021

The curse of F**k upon you
My dad always says it

Funkfield

"The meaning of life is that it stops" - Franz Kafka

The guy

TouchingVirus wrote: »

Following the detonation of a nuclear bomb during the Manhatten Project, the head of the project, Dr Robert Oppenheimer, said the following:

"If the radiance of a thousand suns were to burst at once into the sky, that would be like the splendor of the mighty one. Now I am become Death, the shatterer of worlds."

It's from the Baghavad Gita and it's imagery sticks with me though I hope to never witness it myself.

I love that quote, this is brilliant.

s_carnage

"Take a bow son, take a bow" Andy Gray

The man is like a modern day Joyce with the expressions he comes out with. A legend that will live on through centuries.

Scrambled egg

'Theres 3 types of people in the world ; those who can count , and those who can't.'

Rebel021

s_carnage wrote: »

"Take a bow son, take a bow" Andy Gray

The man is like a modern day Joyce with the expressions he comes out with. A legend that will live on through centuries.

That man is a gibbering gimp:mad:

uch

Do Farts have lumps?

.same.

The Thin Red Line
Everything's a lie. Everything you hear, everything you see. So much to spew out. They just keep coming, one after another. You're in a box. A moving box. They want you dead, or in their lie... There's only one thing a man can do - find something that's his, and make an island for himself. If I never meet you in this life, let me feel the lack; a glance from your eyes, and my life will be yours.

midlandsmissus

Laughter is the shortest difference between two people.

Tar.Aldarion

Like a fox

I remember when this was all fields.

jackie1974

well you reap what you sow ........ so true

Sergeant

He has all the virtues I dislike and none of the vices I admire.

Gingy

"Between the jigs and the reels", we "darkened the door" of the local last night and ended up "3 sheets to the wind".

3 gems in 1 sentence.;)