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Urgent advice needed

kdak

ok so im new here (been on for a while but not really posted before)
i need some advice but its a long story so please stick with me!

my friend has recently been thrown out of his mums house and is temporarily living with his dad. he cant stay there for long as his job, family, child, girlfriend (lives with parents) friends are all a two hour drive away.

he cant afford rent for a house (his child stays with him a few days a week and a flat wouldnt be suitable) and has nowhere close to stay.

trouble is he has talked to a number of community welfare officers and basically hes not entitled to rent allowance.
he may be if he puts his name on the housing list but even then he may not be accepted. and even if he is he'll have to wait for his application to be processed etc.

he was told he might also be entitled if he claims some sort of benefit but
he works one day too many to sign on for the days hes not working and doesnt need/ isnt eligible for any other benefits.

surely there must be a way around this as he genuinely needs it! at the mo hes spending his weeks wages on petrol to get from his dads to work! and even this wont be an option soon as the new nct rule comes in and his car may not pass the test.

everyone is passing him round and telling him to claim so and so but when he tries hes not entitled.
is there anywhere he can go to get this sorted? or any way around it? hes really getting desperate at this stage, please help!

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CDfm

He could be entitled to a dependent child tax credit worth 1830 per annum if the child stays with him more than one night a year.

thebouldwhacker

CDfm wrote: »

Reading between the lines - they are teenage parents and both sets of parents and probably a few others have gotten sick of their whinging and excuses.Everything would be fine if other people would only behave the way they want them to.

Isnt he lucky his Dad took him in.

Its time for a reality check.

Damn, i didn't realise this was the 'i'm a single parent and I want someone to come along with their preconcieved judgments and tell me I suck' thread... damn

CDfm keep such comments for Joe Duffy, we are trying to help.

kdak

CDfm wrote: »

Reading between the lines - they are teenage parents and both sets of parents and probably a few others have gotten sick of their whinging and excuses.Everything would be fine if other people would only behave the way they want them to.

Isnt he lucky his Dad took him in.

Its time for a reality check.

well tbh you know nothing about them.
its only the dad that has nowhere to live, the mothers parents are fine with her 'whinging'.and i also dont see how you came to the conclusion that they are whinging!

i said nothing about other people behaving like they wanted. its nothing to do with behaviour at all so i dont know how you read between the lines and got that.

and theres no excuses being made at all, they've been through all the options and none are viable bar the mother taking the child 24/7 which she is doing at the moment but to be perfectly honest i dont see why the father should have to miss out on seeing/minding his child just because hes not claiming the right benefits. neither of them are cheating the system like other people do, they've been told by nearly all of our mates that the only option is for the mother to claim rent and live with the dad but they want to do things the right way so i dont see why you have to be rude about me asking for some advice to help them out. and before you say 'get a job instead of claiming benefits' he has tried.

CDfm

Reading between the lines - they are teenage parents and both sets of parents and probably a few others have gotten sick of their whinging and excuses.Everything would be fine if other people would only behave the way they want them to.

Isnt he lucky his Dad took him in.

Its time for a reality check.

SarahMc

They should apply for a place in a Community Creche .The place will be considerably cheaper than what they are paying.

Stheno

kdak wrote: »

he could but they used to take alternate days in order to work round her schedual (sp?) cause gettin the train in was a struggle for her in the morning with the buggy. so it'd put alot of strain on the mum. also shes in college all day and when she gets back hes in work so by the time hes off the child is in bed. and shes back in college at nine (leaving at half seven) the next day.

well tbh there has to be a bit of compromise here, if she'd make the effort to take the child into creche every day, it means he gets to rent a place and be close to his child and gets to see him, pay his half of the creche fees, and even have money over to pay off his overdraft and pay her maintenance.

kdak

he could but they used to take alternate days in order to work round her schedual (sp?) cause gettin the train in was a struggle for her in the morning with the buggy. so it'd put alot of strain on the mum. also shes in college all day and when she gets back hes in work so by the time hes off the child is in bed. and shes back in college at nine (leaving at half seven) the next day.

Stheno

kdak wrote: »

so is there a way of breaking the cycle? just save a bit each month til its enough to pay it off?

Yeah, e.g. either ask the bank to reduce the overdraft by a set amount each month (could be any amount) or just budget to reduce it.

In your friends situation though, unless he rents a single room like syklops outlined, he won't be able to afford that.

Could he rent a single room and visit the child at his gf's?

kdak

so is there a way of breaking the cycle? just save a bit each month til its enough to pay it off?

Stheno

kdak wrote: »

i dunno how it works tbh, he said he went into his 500 euro overdraft once and it was taken from his wages the next month, as a result he then needed to use his overdraft again cause he had less money and the cycle keeps repeating, so basically he used 500 then paid it back but then after paying it back he needed to o/d again if that makes sense??? i think thats it anyway.

shes in full time education and the creche is on campus. i think they're looking into finding a cheaper creche. they cant afford to move in together as she'd lose her benefit which is used on the creche and her college expenses (travel, lunch, books etc) and the childs food, nappies etc. for at her parents house.

That's how an overdraft works tbh, until you start paying it back.

A cheaper creche/childminder is definitely worth looking into.

kdak

i dunno how it works tbh, he said he went into his 500 euro overdraft once and it was taken from his wages the next month, as a result he then needed to use his overdraft again cause he had less money and the cycle keeps repeating, so basically he used 500 then paid it back but then after paying it back he needed to o/d again if that makes sense??? i think thats it anyway.

shes in full time education and the creche is on campus. i think they're looking into finding a cheaper creche. they cant afford to move in together as she'd lose her benefit which is used on the creche and her college expenses (travel, lunch, books etc) and the childs food, nappies etc. for at her parents house.

syklops

nouggatti wrote: »

That doesn't make sense about his overdraft, if he has an overdraft facility for €500 he'd not pay that off every month, but he could budget and pay off 50 a month off it and clear it over 10 months.

As for the creche fees, that's €346 he'd have to pay a month if he splits it equally with his gf, have they looked at a cheaper creche or using a childminder?

Even with that, and using the figures above for living in Dublin 15, if he rented as above, kept his food bill to €100 a month, and his gas/esb to €50 a month each (none of which is impossible) and walked to work, then his outgoings including creche fees (assuming he kept his overdraft)

Rent: 825
Creche: 346
Food: 100
Gas/ESB: 100

Total €1371`

It would be very tight but he could do it.

Is the girlfriend working? If she is, then could she not move in with him and they could share rent/bills etc? That would make renting above much more dooable?

Thats what I was trying to get around to in a polite way. If his gf does not work, then why do they need a creche?

syklops

Does his girlfriend work? Could she help him out a bit?

Stheno

kdak wrote: »

sorry shouldve said, his monthly overdraft is 500 so every month thats 500 from his wages to pay it off. dont actually know how he got into the overdraft in the first place but its there. but even without an overdraft their creche alone is 160 a week.
i wasnt saying you were belittling him in any way i was just saying thats what he does and its not min wage (cause if it was he would prob be entitled!)
he finishes work at 10 or 11 each night so he misses the last train. he can get in on public transport just not home.
i know it sounds like im being really stubborn and throwing all your ideas back at you im really not trying to!

That doesn't make sense about his overdraft, if he has an overdraft facility for €500 he'd not pay that off every month, but he could budget and pay off 50 a month off it and clear it over 10 months.

As for the creche fees, that's €346 he'd have to pay a month if he splits it equally with his gf, have they looked at a cheaper creche or using a childminder?

Even with that, and using the figures above for living in Dublin 15, if he rented as above, kept his food bill to €100 a month, and his gas/esb to €50 a month each (none of which is impossible) and walked to work, then his outgoings including creche fees (assuming he kept his overdraft)

Rent: 825
Creche: 346
Food: 100
Gas/ESB: 100

Total €1371`

It would be very tight but he could do it.

Is the girlfriend working? If she is, then could she not move in with him and they could share rent/bills etc? That would make renting above much more dooable?

kdak

sorry shouldve said, his monthly overdraft is 500 so every month thats 500 from his wages to pay it off. dont actually know how he got into the overdraft in the first place but its there. but even without an overdraft their creche alone is 160 a week.
i wasnt saying you were belittling him in any way i was just saying thats what he does and its not min wage (cause if it was he would prob be entitled!)
he finishes work at 10 or 11 each night so he misses the last train. he can get in on public transport just not home.
i know it sounds like im being really stubborn and throwing all your ideas back at you im really not trying to!

Stheno

syklops wrote: »

I am sorry if I belittled his career, and I am glad he is not on minimum wage, but that is good news for his part.

With regard to houses:
Single bed in house share in clonsilla - 290 quid.

Single bed in house share in Tyrrelstown - 250

There are plenty others.

The problem with that appears to be his need to have his child stay with him.

There are two bed apartments available in Clonsilla/Blanch/Dublin 15 though for €825 per month.

Once he got the deposit together for it, then potentially using the net €1386 figure I used above, he'd pay €825 for rent, his transport cost would go down to approx. €30 for a bus pass, food and bills should be covered by 300 a month, and he'd have €236 left over after that, and his child would be able to stay over a few days a week too.

He does have a few options imo OP.

http://www.daft.ie/searchrental.daft?s%5Bcc_id%5D=c1&s%5Ba_id%5D%5B%5D=177&s%5Ba_id%5D%5B%5D=189&s%5Ba_id%5D%5B%5D=195&s%5Ba_id%5D%5B%5D=198&s%5Ba_id%5D%5B%5D=200&s%5Ba_id%5D%5B%5D=3674&s%5Ba_id%5D%5B%5D=204&s%5Ba_id%5D%5B%5D=3700&s%5Ba_id%5D%5B%5D=209&s%5Bmnp%5D=&s%5Bmxp%5D=900&s%5Bbd_no%5D=2&s%5Bpt_id%5D=&s%5Bmove_in_date%5D=0&s%5Blease%5D=&s%5Bfurn%5D=0&search=Search+%BB&more=&tab=1&s%5Bsearch_type%5D=rental&s%5Btransport%5D=&s%5Badvanced%5D=&s%5Bprice_per_room%5D=

syklops

kdak wrote: »

hes not on min wage, hes in the back doing the stock/ deliveries etc.
he also needs the car now cause hes to get from loais to dublin!
if he finds accomodation he wont be using it but right now he needs it!
and its not a souped up power car its just a basic car to get from a to b.
could you put up a link for the daft page please?
the money he gets from the benefit isnt what he wants, its the fact he'd be entitled to rent allowance if hes in receipt of the benefit.

I am sorry if I belittled his career, and I am glad he is not on minimum wage, but that is good news for his part.

With regard to houses:
Single bed in house share in clonsilla - 290 quid.

Single bed in house share in Tyrrelstown - 250

There are plenty others.

Stheno

kdak wrote: »

hes not on min wage, hes in the back doing the stock/ deliveries etc.
he also needs the car now cause hes to get from loais to dublin!
if he finds accomodation he wont be using it but right now he needs it!
and its not a souped up power car its just a basic car to get from a to b.
could you put up a link for the daft page please?
the money he gets from the benefit isnt what he wants, its the fact he'd be entitled to rent allowance if hes in receipt of the benefit.

Regarding the car, he has potential alternatives in terms of public transport.

Is he paying his dad rent at the moment?

kdak

syklops wrote: »

Ok, so he is 19, working in Blanchardstown, doing store operations. I assume that means he stacks shelves etc in a supermarket for minimum wage?

I would say under no circumstances should he reduce his hours just to get benefit. Social welfare for the under twenties was halved in the budget, so I doubt it would be worth anything to him, and as you said he will have major difficulty getting the hours back. Minimum wage is about 8.65 an hour which for 28 hours a week comes to about 242 euro's a week or 968 euro's a month.

I just had a quick look on daft and you can get rooms in houses in Blanch for as little as 250 a month.

Also, he needs to get rid of the car, or at the very least stop using it. Alot of my friends in the 18-27 age bracket still live at home and have a nice car, and have what I call 'virtual independence'. Sure, they can go anywhere they want, whenever they want to, but in my opinion, unless you live in the country, you have no business having a car, until you can afford it, and on 28 hours a week, minimum wage, you can not afford a car. He could probably barely afford it when he lived at home. Working in blanch, living in blanch, he probably wont even need the bus to get to work, and can then use the bus to go see his child.

hes not on min wage, hes in the back doing the stock/ deliveries etc.
he also needs the car now cause hes to get from loais to dublin!
if he finds accomodation he wont be using it but right now he needs it!
and its not a souped up power car its just a basic car to get from a to b.
could you put up a link for the daft page please?
the money he gets from the benefit isnt what he wants, its the fact he'd be entitled to rent allowance if hes in receipt of the benefit.

Stheno

syklops wrote: »

Ok, so he is 19, working in Blanchardstown, doing store operations. I assume that means he stacks shelves etc in a supermarket for minimum wage?

I would say under no circumstances should he reduce his hours just to get benefit. Social welfare for the under twenties was halved in the budget, so I doubt it would be worth anything to him, and as you said he will have major difficulty getting the hours back. Minimum wage is about 8.65 an hour which for 28 hours a week comes to about 242 euro's a week or 968 euro's a month.

I just had a quick look on daft and you can get rooms in houses in Blanch for as little as 250 a month.

Also, he needs to get rid of the car, or at the very least stop using it. Alot of my friends in the 18-27 age bracket still live at home and have a nice car, and have what I call 'virtual independence'. Sure, they can go anywhere they want, whenever they want to, but in my opinion, unless you live in the country, you have no business having a car, until you can afford it, and on 28 hours a week, minimum wage, you can not afford a car. He could probably barely afford it when he lived at home. Working in blanch, living in blanch, he probably wont even need the bus to get to work, and can then use the bus to go see his child.

Good point ref social welfare, I forgot about the changes. I've edited my post above to reflect that

Stheno

ok I'll not quote it then.

If the 320 is net then he shouldn't be spending all of that on petrol just to get to work.

I live in Portlaoise and have commuted to Dublin in the past petrol at most (when prices were 1.40 a litre) cost €80 a week.

He can change his address with his bank etc once he goes in with his id, and then use a bank statement etc, as proof of his address in his dads.

Are his shifts normal hours (like 9-5)? If they are then there are a fair range of bus services from Portlaoise to Dublin, including one to the airport, which would potentially work out cheaper than driving, and there is a bus from the airport to blanch too, timewise it probably wouldn't be any more than he's doing as he's not got the bus lanes that the bus services have.

Also would he consider renting in Laois possibly? Rents in Laois have dropped hugely this past six months, you can rent a two bed house/flat in Laois from €500 a month.

If he considered that, then on 320 a week, which rounds up to 1386 per month, he'd have 836 after rent, which would potentially pay for transport (max €346) food (150 a month), bills (200 per month should cover esb, gas, car insurance and phone), leaving him €190 which is about 40 a week.

http://www.daft.ie/searchrental.daft?s%5Bcc_id%5D=c8&s%5Bmnp%5D=&s%5Bmxp%5D=600&s%5Bbd_no%5D=2&s%5Bpt_id%5D=&s%5Bmove_in_date%5D=0&s%5Blease%5D=&s%5Bfurn%5D=0&search=Search+%BB&more=&tab=1&s%5Bsearch_type%5D=rental&s%5Btransport%5D=&s%5Badvanced%5D=&s%5Bprice_per_room%5D=

syklops

kdak wrote: »

hes not paying maintenance at the mo, she doesnt mind this but she does need him to contribute to things like nappies, food, etc. in the long term. he never really pays a set maintenance amount just gives the mother money to get by like.
they've got a good relationship and shes happy to just let him get himself sorted while she looks after the child.
hes in dublin 15 and working 28 hours a week in store opperations.
hes almost twenty.
he cant stay with the gf.
he said there'd prob be able to get his hours reduced but he cant apply for the jobseekers if he has no proof of address (or in this case, an actual address!) and hes wary of gettin the hours rduced as if he gets refused benefits he wont get them hours back. once they're reduced thats it.

thanks again for all your replies, its a case of the more advice the better, so its appreciated.

Ok, so he is 19, working in Blanchardstown, doing store operations. I assume that means he stacks shelves etc in a supermarket for minimum wage?

I would say under no circumstances should he reduce his hours just to get benefit. Social welfare for the under twenties was halved in the budget, so I doubt it would be worth anything to him, and as you said he will have major difficulty getting the hours back. Minimum wage is about 8.65 an hour which for 28 hours a week comes to about 242 euro's a week or 968 euro's a month.

I just had a quick look on daft and you can get rooms in houses in Blanch for as little as 250 a month.

Also, he needs to get rid of the car, or at the very least stop using it. Alot of my friends in the 18-27 age bracket still live at home and have a nice car, and have what I call 'virtual independence'. Sure, they can go anywhere they want, whenever they want to, but in my opinion, unless you live in the country, you have no business having a car, until you can afford it, and on 28 hours a week, minimum wage, you can not afford a car. He could probably barely afford it when he lived at home. Working in blanch, living in blanch, he probably wont even need the bus to get to work, and can then use the bus to go see his child.

For blanch, read clonsilla. You said Dublin 15, and I wanted to put a name to it. Clonsilla should even be cheaper.

kdak

his dads near enough to laois and the gf and child in clonsilla.
i think its roughly about 320 a week, give or take.
he has no proof of his dads address as all his post goes to his old house.
would a letter from his dad do as proof?
he works three 8 hour days (i think) and then a few hours on the fourth day so if he was to drop hours he'd just stick to working the 3 8 hour days.
(as silly as it sounds im a bit wary of puttin up all his info so il prob delete it in a while)

Stheno

kdak wrote: »

hes not paying maintenance at the mo, she doesnt mind this but she does need him to contribute to things like nappies, food, etc. in the long term. he never really pays a set maintenance amount just gives the mother money to get by like.
they've got a good relationship and shes happy to just let him get himself sorted while she looks after the child.

Well that's a start at least.

hes in dublin 15 and working 28 hours a week in store opperations.

And where do his dad and girlfriend live?

he said there'd prob be able to get his hours reduced but he cant apply for the jobseekers if he has no proof of address (or in this case, an actual address!) and hes wary of gettin the hours rduced as if he gets refused benefits he wont get them hours back. once they're reduced thats it.

Why couldn't he use his dad's address to claim the benefits from?

Are the 28 hours four 7 hour shifts?

Do you mind me asking roughly what he earns pw?

kdak

hes not paying maintenance at the mo, she doesnt mind this but she does need him to contribute to things like nappies, food, etc. in the long term. he never really pays a set maintenance amount just gives the mother money to get by like.
they've got a good relationship and shes happy to just let him get himself sorted while she looks after the child.
hes in dublin 15 and working 28 hours a week in store opperations.
hes almost twenty.
he cant stay with the gf.
he said there'd prob be able to get his hours reduced but he cant apply for the jobseekers if he has no proof of address (or in this case, an actual address!) and hes wary of gettin the hours rduced as if he gets refused benefits he wont get them hours back. once they're reduced thats it.

thanks again for all your replies, its a case of the more advice the better, so its appreciated.

syklops

Yea, it would be nice to know roughly what he earns, where he lives, where his work is and what he does. That way one of us might be in a situation to help him.

Did you say he is still with the mother of the child? And she lives at home but cant let him stay with her? If thats the case then he does not need to pay maintenance. His child has a roof over his head and is safe. Stop giving herself money for the moment, until he gets things sorted.

How old is he?

Stheno

kdak wrote: »

the mother and father of the child are together as a couple but not living together (she lives with her parents). they cant afford to move in together as a couple.
it is complicated!

Could he do any of the following:

1. Move in with his gf and her parents for a short while to allow him build up the money for a house/flat?

2. Ask the gf if they could agree to reduce his maintenance payments (via court if it's a court agreement) short term with a time frame for it to end?

3. Rent a room in a houseshare, and arrange to visit his child with his gf, rather than having his child stay with him, again short term to allow him to build up the funds to rent a place where his child can stay?

4. Speak to his employers about potentially going from 4 days a week to 3 days a week, so that he is then eligible for some benefits?

5. See if any of his family could loan him some of the money he needs to sort a deposit and first months rent on a house/flat that would be suitable for his child?

Do you mind me asking what part of the country he lives in and where he works?

kdak

the mother and father of the child are together as a couple but not living together (she lives with her parents). they cant afford to move in together as a couple.
it is complicated!

Overheal

hes in a relationship with the mother so the maintenance isnt a problem at the mo but thats only a short term fix that doesnt really make much of a difference.

Whos dating what now?

You aren't going to like hearing this and neither will he but his child is acting like a Dead Weight. Realistically he needs to find accomodation closer to work and that will be much easier if the baby is left with his Dad (or girlfriend) for a while. I wouldn't like to part with a child either but when his situation is clearly quite dire he needs to consider the option as viable.

CDfm

Does he regularily stay there ?

It seems to me that the CWO are not buying his story and wont pay 2 lots of benefit for ! kid.