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Stories to impress foreign people you want to sleep with...

JangoFett

So me and my mates were talkin about this, we all have stories, complete lies, we tell foreign women to make ourselves seem cooler or whatever!

Mine is that I am descended from Irish royalty. I did a family tree and found that I'm technically an Irish Prince. A few girls have believed it cuz I elaborated on it a bit more and gave them some Irish history

Anyone else have these tall tales?

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antodeco

I have a 10 foot langer. That generally works

Latchy

Did any foreign girls sleep with you OP ?

JangoFett

So far, one girl, I'm in Oz and tell every Aussie/foreign girl that story, a few have believed it

Sea Sharp

Say subtely that your family's rich. And it'll all be going to you.
They'll give you a blow-job

Rob_l

I heard and this all my just be a rumour but I did hear it and that was "Lies make the baby jesus cry".

antodeco

JangoFett wrote: »

So far, one girl, I'm in Oz and tell every Aussie/foreign girl that story, a few have believed it

Dude, I dont think that the story "technically works" if its only one person

Just tell them your Bono's kid. Even better if theres two girls. Look at them in the eyes and say "Hey, Im bono's son. Did you hear he's going solo and the band are looking for replacements? How about "you two" and me get together and Ill make my own bono".

Then tell them you have a 10 foot langer.

2-ShortDa5foot5

My great grandfather was involved in the Irish War of Independence... Good reaction always!

(Unless they're English! :eek:)

antodeco

Rob_l wrote: »

I heard and this all my just be a rumour but I did hear it and that was "Lies make the baby jesus cry".

Meh, he's a baby, so he's probably crying anyways.

Latchy

2-ShortDa5foot5 wrote: »

My great grandfather was involved in the Irish War of Independence... Good reaction always! (Unless they're English! :eek:)

You might find quite a few english women would find that a turn on

JangoFett

antodeco wrote: »

Dude, I dont think that the story "technically works" if its only one person
.

True, but I'm gonna be trying it again tomorrow night. Its a good line for complete bllocks like

Latchy

JangoFett wrote: »

So far, one girl, I'm in Oz and tell every Aussie/foreign girl that story, a few have believed it

Those foreign /aussie girls are so easly led

ScumLord

2-ShortDa5foot5 wrote: »

My great grandfather was involved in the Irish War of Independence... Good reaction always! (Unless they're English! :eek:)

I was in Manchester a few weeks ago and they all where chanting IRA slogans (after they found out we where Irish) and didn't seem to have any problems with the IRAs past discretions. One even suggested we visit a pub that was blown up by the IRA.

JangoFett

latchyco wrote: »

those Foreign /aussie Girls Are So Easly Led

Exactly!!!!

Latchy

JangoFett wrote: »

Exactly!!!!

Keep up the good work

ryoishin

"I should nt really be drinking ill need a clear head tomorrow, for what! oh i saved this kid from drowning and im getting an award".

JangoFett

Like a dog, loyal to my bone, c'mon, surely everyone else has some stories

2-ShortDa5foot5

ScumLord wrote: »

I was in Manchester a few weeks ago and they all where chanting IRA slogans (after they found out we where Irish) and didn't seem to have any problems with the IRAs past discretions. One even suggested we visit a pub that was blown up by the IRA.

Good sense of humour those Brits! Just in case I offend anybody it's the 1916-1920's era IRA I'm referring to, not the 1970+ "New IRA"!

Sherifu

Ciúnas bóthar cailín bainne.

JangoFett

lol, thats worked a few times over here in Oz as well

PCB

this only works really works in OZ if your built and look athlethic.

''yea im not drinkin tonight. have a big day tomo''

''oh really...what you got on?''

''im just over here meet my new team mates. my drunken ass friends over there just tagged along for the ride. they are such idiots''

'' what team you going playing for?''

'' i just signed with (insert local professional teams name here). really looking forward to it''

''omg really, like really, that is so cool. matilda come here wait til you hear this!''

q some easy puntang!!

this is extra impressive if you are completely locked and only drinking water because ur so f0cked!!

try it. people think irish dont lie:D:D

Neamhshuntasach

My little white lie was to tell girls while i went to college in the states that i was a photographer or a talent scout for an Irish fashion magazine that was trying to move into the America market. Worked like a charm over the years. Americans love the chance to be famous.

But the Irish accent alone was a good story because once it was heard in a bar i'd always get attention. Well that and the fact that i'm a handsome mother fcuker

MikeHoncho

No. I dont need to trick women into sleeping with me.

[Deleted User]

This post has been deleted.

AckwelFoley

i just show them my 14" Penis.

They either run screaming, stick around and take some photos.. or smile like they've got a plan in mind for it.

AnonoBoy

I tell them that I'm a nice decent guy.

Oh wait... I tell that lie to Irish girls too.

The Bollox

I tell them I work for a pharmaceutical company and ask them if they think the rag I'm carrying smells like chloroform. works a charm

Keano

cúpla foca

Enough said.

boardinwork

JangoFett wrote: »

So me and my mates were talkin about this, we all have stories, complete lies, we tell foreign women to make ourselves seem cooler or whatever!

Mine is that I am descended from Irish royalty. I did a family tree and found that I'm technically an Irish Prince. A few girls have believed it cuz I elaborated on it a bit more and gave them some Irish history

Anyone else have these tall tales?

Told a half japanese/english girl in London that i had 2 degrees and restored priceless picture frames for some of the largest art galleries in the world. I was just in London to have a look at an old Rembrandt piece and once i was finished there, I would probably be flying off to a new gallery in New York where "i heard the money is great"!

It worked but had to backtrack and come clean when we were in a taxi back to "my place".

I was staying in my mates brothers place.

It was a squat in Peckham! He had only told me it was a squat when we were actually on the flight over!

Anyway, i came clean and she saw the funny side

Latchy

Wearing a uniform of sorts ie, soldier ,police .abulance has a strange effect on some women .Get yourself into a uniform lads

Jimoslimos

latchyco wrote: »

Wearing a uniform of sorts ie, soldier ,police .abulance has a strange effect on some women .Get yourself into a uniform lads

A uniform you say.....
Well I've tried motorcycle cop, red indian, sailor and construction worker uniforms and none of them have had the desired effect on the ladies:(