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What do I do now?

Devon

Recently, a friend told me he was gay and that I was the only one on the planet he's told. So far. It has to be the most courageous thing he's ever done. I still can't imagine how difficult that must have been for him.

He's only a young guy and I'm a lot older than he is. I've known him for a long time now and know that he trusts me more than anyone else he knows.

I feel like he was reaching out to me but I feel so inadequate in supporting him because I don't know what I'm supposed to say/do/advise in such a situation.

I know some of you reading this will have gone through what must have been a very emotional time in your life "coming out". Can you tell me what you found helpful and supportive, and what you suggest I do to help him through what lies ahead for him?

Thanks for any replies folks.

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azezil

He just needs a friend, someone to talk to, even just having someone to listen can work wonders in these early stages, you don't need to advise him or try direct him. If he's in Dublin there's a group called BelongTo for under 24's, they'll be able to help him if he wants to interact with other young gay individuals.

Boston

1) Be there for him

Be a friend, do all the stuff you normally do. You're not expected to provide advice, more be a person to listen to him. He's probably very confused and uncertain at the moment.

2) Don't break his confidence in you.

A lot of people decide that to supposedly make things easier they start outing someone to other people. Its actually scary how some people rationalise this.